Chapter Text
1. One - Fifth Year
Sirius buries his face in his hands.
“Why is he dressed like that?”
James chuckles, patting his back as if that gesture is meant to comfort him, and sips his butterbeer. Then, he raises his hand and waves. Sirius ducks and avoids being hit by a hair's breadth.
“Moony! We’re over here.”
Remus’ head turns around and he smiles brightly, heading in their direction with long strides. Sirius peeks through his fingers. Remus is wearing brown flared trousers, the ones that hug his waist the way Sirius wants to hug it as well. They dangerously cinch at his backside and Sirius has to avert his eyes.
Remus is even taller than usual in his heeled boots. And even though Sirius isn’t small, Remus would still tower over him. The colourful shirt Remus is wearing has an oversized collar and exposes his tanned chest, opening just wide enough to give Sirius a peak of his muscles. His hair isn’t styled today, honey brown curls reaching his shoulders, but he is wearing soft eyeliner to accentuate his beautiful eyes.
He looks good.
Sirius gulps.
“Sirius?” Remus sits down next to them and Sirius hides in his hands once more.
Why is Remus doing this to him?
“Are you okay?”
Sirius doesn’t lift his head.
“I’m fine.” he grumbles into his hands.
James snorts. “Don’t worry, Moony. He’s just a little dumb.”
That gets Sirius to lift his head. “I’m not!”
James stares at him with something akin to pity and doesn’t answer. Sirius sometimes really doesn’t understand his best friend.
Remus is frowning, his hazel eyes clouding. “Are you sure you’re fine?”
“Yes.” Sirius says, albeit a tad too loudly. James winces (which he deserves, that bastard) and Remus blinks.
“Where is Wormtail?” Sirius asks in an attempt to distract both Remus and himself.
Remus grins, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively. “On a date.”
“Ooh.” James claps his hands in excitement. “With whom?”
Remus shrugs, unable to recall. “No idea. Some Ravenclaw girl of our year.”
“Dixon?” Sirius offers readily. “Landon?”
Remus shakes his head, his brows furrowing. “No, the one with the blue hair.”
“Henderson?”
Remus squints his eyes now. “I think so?”
“She’s a sweet one.” Sirius sighs dreamily. “So docile.”
James huffs. “Did you sleep with every girl in our year?”
Sirius takes a moment to recount. There was Smith, Jackson, then Landon-
Remus raises his eyebrows. “Really, Padfoot?”
He sounds weird, something is off. Maybe he also wanted to take Henderson on a date?
Sirius snaps his fingers and beams when he remembers. “I didn’t sleep with Evans.”
Remus groans and massages his temples.
“I would hope so.” James glares at him. “That would be the ultimate betrayal.”
Sirius sometimes wonders if they understand that he is joking.
Yes, he has slept with a couple of girls but he isn’t really all that into women.
He’s more into men.
Men with honey brown hair and hazel eyes.
Men with soft scars along their body.
Men with deep, rumbling voices.
Men who have a furry little problem.
He can’t count how many cheesy songs he has written for Remus. (About fifty-seven, he believes.)
Probably a few too many. (Fifty-seven too many.)
But he just can’t stop.
He can’t stop himself from writing about that amazing guy and he can’t stop himself from touching that amazing guy either.
But they are just really good friends.
He throws an arm around Remus’ shoulders. (Damn those muscles.)
“What about you, Moony?” he inquires dryly. “Got any girl on your mind?”
Remus blushes furiously and James cackles.
“Why are you blushing?” Sirius teases and pinches Remus’ side, even though it feels as if his insides are twisting. “Who is it?”
Remus shoves his elbow into Sirius’ ribs. The latter howls in pain.
“Ow! What the fuck, Remus?”
Remus beams and that feeling in Sirius’ stomach promptly melts away.
“That was entirely your fault.” Remus says.
Sirius pouts but he is squealing on the inside.
That smile is so fucking gorgeous.
When he excuses himself to the bathroom, tearing his hair out, he mumbles. “How do straight men even exist? I mean, how can you meet a beautiful man and then not think about his smile for, like, the rest of your life?”
After a pause, he adds. “And his eyes and his jawline, his arms, his chest?”
They are such good friends.
They return to Hogwarts later that evening, now only the two of them, Remus and Sirius. James has already bid them goodbye, eager to catch up with Evans, who is walking a couple of feet in front of them, even if she is only going to ignore him.
Sirius keeps throwing glances at Remus from the side.
The werewolf is shivering in the cold that has filled the evening air. He is still only wearing that shirt with the damn wide collar.
Sirius considers casting a warming charm, he can’t believe Remus hasn’t thought of that yet, but decides against that.
He’s got a much better idea.
He shrugs off his thick leather jacket and presses it to Remus’ chest.
“Take it.” he says. “You’re freezing.”
Remus’ head whips around and he stares at him with wide eyes. The jacket nearly falls from his hands.
“What?”
Sirius rolls his eyes. “Put it on. You’re cold, you need it.”
“But you’ll be freezing.” Remus doesn’t let go of the jacket though.
Sirius grins lopsidedly. “Don’t worry. I’m hot-blooded.”
It’s rather dark but he can still make out the soft pink that colours Remus’ cheeks.
The latter sighs, holding the jacket for another moment before putting it on.
Sirius lets out a sigh. It feels oddly good to see Remus in his clothes.
He nods in approval, winking. “There, now you’re warm and devastatingly handsome.”
Remus turns even redder and Sirius suppresses the urge to touch his cheeks to feel if they are burning. He doesn’t though and Remus rolls his eyes, clearly not taking Sirius’ comments seriously, even though Sirius is definitely serious. (Duh.)
But later that night, Remus is still wearing the jacket and he sniffs it once when he thinks no one is looking.
Sirius is looking though.
Sirius is always looking at Remus.
(Even later that night, Lily notices the jacket Remus is wearing and giggles.
“Why won’t you tell Sirius that you want to kiss him?” she whispers in his ear.
Remus sighs. “I just don’t think he is into men.”
They are just really good friends.)
2. Fifth Year
Remus stumbles out of the library, arms full of books, and promptly runs into Sirius. He curses and crouches down to gather the dozens of books that now litter the floor.
Damn him.
“Shit, sorry.” Sirius bends down as well and takes the books from Remus’ hands. Their fingers brush and a shiver runs down Remus’ spine. “Let me carry ‘em.”
Remus doesn’t argue. Sirius is using that tone, that stubborn one which he uses when James has a mental breakdown over Lily and he has to cheer him up or Peter cries over the girl that turned him down and he has to convince him that he is still wanted.
(Or when Remus distances himself from them again because “Who would want to be friends with a werewolf?” and Sirius yells at him that “This motherfucker does.”)
Therefore Remus lets him be.
“I was worried, you know.” Sirius says in such a manner that Remus can’t take him seriously. He is also swaying dangerously as the werewolf stacks the last five books on top. “Dinner’s nearly over and you have been in that cursed place since noon.”
“I lost track of time.” Remus shrugs. “And it’s called the library. It’s not cursed.”
“Well, cursed or not, you’ve got to eat something.” Sirius pouts. He nearly falls when he doesn’t see the first step of the staircase but steadies himself in the last second.
Remus quickly pulls back the arm he had stretched out to catch Sirius.
“I went to the kitchens and got a snack.” he says. “Don’t worry.”
He is lying but he doesn’t want Sirius to drag him to the Great Hall where hundreds of other students eat and scream at each other.
He is dead on his feet right now.
Though Sirius probably knows that Remus is lying. (He always does.)
“Alright.” Sirius huffs and a couple of books tumble from his hold down the stairs. Remus runs after them, picking them quickly up.
Once Sirius arrives at the bottom of the stairs, Remus reaches out with one hand to take a few more books from Sirius. He really doesn’t need an accident right now.
Sirius stares at him for a second and then switches all the books he is holding to one arm, tucking them underneath (how he does this is a complete mystery), and takes Remus’ hand.
His fingers are warm and dry, curling around Remus’ palm.
Remus’ mouth opens and closes. “That not what I-”
He stops himself and sighs. “Okay.”
It feels nice to hold Sirius’ hand.
When they reach the common room, it is surprisingly empty.
“Hufflepuff’s throwing a party this night for winning against Slytherin.” Sirius says. “Of course, most Gryffindors will be there too.”
Right, there was a game earlier that day. Remus went with his friends to cheer on the Hufflepuffs. It feels like days have passed since the morning.
“Why aren’t you there?” he asks, concerned he might have ruined Sirius’ night.
“I just told you.” Sirius frowns. “I was worried.”
Remus’ eyes widen and he lets go of Sirius’ hand that he was still holding?
He turns his back to his friend so Sirius can’t see the heat tinting his cheeks pink. He hurries up the steps to their room, listening to Sirius’ slower, heavier footsteps that follow him. They set down the books on the floor between a few dirty shirts and old parchment and Remus grabs the essay he still has to finish before they head back to the common room.
There are maybe five other students sitting in various corners. Sirius pulls him to the couch right in front of the biggest fireplace, plopping down and leaning against the left armrest. Remus sits next to him, leaving a careful distance between their knees and spreads his papers across the little table next to the right armrest.
He gets to enjoy a few minutes of silence before Sirius declares loudly. “I’m bored.”
Remus chuckles and is ready to comment but the laughter sticks in his throat when Sirius lays his head on Remus’ shoulder. He freezes.
“This okay?” Sirius mumbles.
“Yeah.” Remus says hoarsely, even though he doesn’t know how this could cure Sirius’ boredom.
Fifteen minutes later, Sirius is sleeping soundly on his shoulder.
An hour later, Remus’ head is resting against Sirius’. This has probably been Sirius’ plan all along.
A couple of hours later, Remus stirs as people arrive, drunkenly joking and laughing.
“Subtle.” a voice that sounds suspiciously like James mutters from above.
(The next morning, Remus awakes when his pillow moves.
He sits up in confusion and the bed beneath him groans. He frowns, squinting through his sleep-swollen eyes, and makes out a figure. Long, black curls frame a striking face and grey eyes stare at him. Soft lips curl into a smile. Lips Remus would love to kiss.
At breakfast, James wiggles his eyebrows when they lock eyes and Remus blushes.
Maybe he did press a little kiss on that damned mouth.
So what?)
3. Sixth Year
The girl throws another glance towards their table.
Sirius glares at her.
She pins her hair behind her ear and blinks, fluttering her lashes.
Sirius glowers.
“What are you staring at?” Remus asks and turns around to follow Sirius’ gaze.
The girl blushes when Remus catches her staring and giggles. (Urgh.)
“Isn’t she a year below us?” James says, scratching his head while he is trying to recall her name.
“Hufflepuff.” Remus nods and waves.
The girl smiles brightly and raises her hand. Her fingers wiggle.
Sirius purses his lips.
“Hey.” Remus calls.
Now she beams and heads over.
“Hi, Remus.” she says with a disgustingly sweet voice.
Sirius wants to vomit.
“You’re Elise Smith, right?” Remus is smiling at her.
Something ugly rears its head inside Sirius’ chest.
“Lisa Smith.” the girl corrects. (Ha! Take that. He doesn’t even know your name.) She is still as red as a tomato.
In Sirius’ opinion there is only one person who looks good when flustered.
And it’s not her.
“Do you need help?” Remus asks and scoots over to make space for the girl.
Now his and Sirius’ feet aren’t touching anymore.
Sirius feels cold.
The girl sits down and smiles. “Yes, please.”
James snorts.
Smith looks up and frowns but doesn’t comment. (Sirius suppressed the childish urge to stick her tongue out at her.)
“Well, what do you need help with?” Remus is still so nice.
The girl bats her eyelashes. “Charms. I heard you are very talented.”
Sirius clenches his fist under the table.
“Thank you.” Remus grins. Why is he smiling at her?
He begins talking and Sirius tries to ignore them. He stares down at his unfinished essay on some weird spell about hair. He doesn’t even know what subject it’s for.
James next to him shakes as he is trying to suppress his laughter. Sirius elbows him. James yelps and turns his head to hide his grin. Why are they best friends again?
Smith and Remus continue talking and Sirius wonders if Remus even realises that she is flirting with him. She is touching his upper arm, his hand, she is tucking her curls away, and she is smiling so much her cheeks must hurt from the strain.
Sirius sighs, slumping.
“What’s wrong?” Remus asks, cutting the girl off. It’s satisfying how she glares at Sirius for something that clearly isn’t his fault.
Remus just likes him better.
“Nothing.” Sirius says. “I’m just lost. Help me?”
“Of course.” Remus says and turns to Smith. “Do you understand it now?”
She frowns. She is likely debating whether to disagree to stay but make Remus look like a bad teacher and make herself look stupid or to agree and leave.
“Yes, thank you.” she says and gets up, tittering. (Ew.)
But despite her leaving and Remus finally paying attention to him again, Sirius isn’t happy.
He isn’t happy when she greets Remus at lunch and then keeps smiling at him.
James laughs at him from across the table, taking advantage of a distracted Remus and leaning over. “Are you jealous, Padfoot? You are sulking.”
“I am not sulking.” Sirius insists, jutting his lower lip forwards even more.
James throws him a look. Sirius hopes Lily Evans rejects him again.
Then, he very casually puts an arm around Remus’ shoulders and pulls him close. He smells good.
“What’s up?” the other asks. He doesn’t withdraw.
“Nothin’” Sirius says. “Everything’s just peachy.”
James is still laughing at him. Sirius glares furiously and James laughs even harder. He redirects his glare at that Hufflepuff girl. And at every other person that even glances their way.
Eventually James stops making fun of him in order to dazedly smile at Lily Evans and ask her out again.
Sirius debates for a hot second if he prefers James laughing at him. He doesn’t come to a conclusion as Remus rises, Sirius’ arm falling from his shoulders.
“Where are you going?” he asks.
“Outside. I want to take a stroll.” Remus says. “Want to come with?”
Sirius grins. “Sure.”
On their way out he sticks his tongue out at the Hufflepuff girl.
Remus isn’t certain what is going on with his best friend.
The whole day Sirius has been tense and snapping and glaring at everyone in vicinity. Hopefully half an hour of fresh air will help.
They walk down the halls, coming across a couple of students. The corridors are mostly empty though and Remus thoroughly enjoys the silence.
…
Maybe he misses Sirius’ usual chatter but he doesn’t want to pressure his friend into talking.
Their shoulders are brushing as they walk and the back of their hands touch every few steps.
It would be so easy to take Sirius’ hand with his own.
Remus is confident in himself. Holding Sirius’ hand would certainly calm him down.
But then it might get awkward, walking down the hallways with others staring at them.
Holding hands is nice though.
What if Sirius would be disgusted? Maybe holding hands is totally uncool.
He keeps going through all of the pro and contra arguments through his head.
Eventually he wins the argument against himself and tentatively takes Sirius’ hand, not even intertwining their fingers. Their palms fit loosely against each other and warmth flows through Remus.
He carefully glances at the man beside him to catch his reaction. Blood drains from his face when he sees Sirius looking shocked, eyes wide and mouth open.
He is ready to withdraw his hold but then Sirius’ hand tightens. He jerks them upwards, waving their hands over their heads.
He yells. “Remus Lupin just grabbed my hand!”
Remus’ jaw drops but Sirius continues. “This is a glorious and beautiful day, my dearest friends of Hogwarts!”
Remus wants to dig a hole in the ground and hide. The handful of students in proximity are looking their way.
“Excuse us while I take my very best friend away for the next couple of hours, so I can snog him senseless!” Sirius shouts.
Someone giggles and another person snorts.
Remus’ cheeks burn.
(They might share a few kisses in the broom closet later on.)
4. Sixth Year
Sirius hates Valentine’s Day.
Kind of.
He likes the concept - chocolates and flowers are really nice - but he really despises the hundreds of roses and letters he receives every year.
There is only one person he would like to get roses and letters from but that person won’t give him those.
“What’s got you so caught up?” James asks from his bed, where he is lying on his stomach, browsing through a book.
Sirius groans and falls back into the sheets.
“Is this about Remus?”
Sometimes James is dangerously perceptive.
“No?” That sounds very much like a question out of Sirius' mouth.
“Why don’t you ask him out?” James offers. “Or at least get him a rose.”
“We are just friends.” Sirius says.
“But you would like to kiss him, right?” James tilts his head.
“I mean.” Sirius shrugs.” I’d make out with him but like - as friends, you know?”
“You can’t make out with your friend!” James says, slamming the book shut with a bang. Sirius doesn’t understand why he is so annoyed.
“Of course you can.” Sirius retorts. “We’ve done it many times before already.”
James drops his head in his pillow, muffling a scream.
Sirius really doesn’t get him.
But now he has an idea.
He spends the little money he has on chocolate, that expensive, bitter stuff Remus loves. He snags a couple of roses (he has already thrown the ones he received away) from the students who are distributing them. He places the flowers in a vase next to his bed and leaves the chocolate on the floor. Then he goes to find his secret stash of tapes in the secret corridor on the fifth floor and gathers three of his sweetest mixtapes.
When he returns and pads into their room, James and Remus are lounging on the floor, spying on someone with their map.
They look up at his entrance and Remus throws him a dazzling smile.
Sirius is blinded. He stares for a moment before James’ pointed cough rips him from his trance.
“Erm.” Sirius scratches his neck. Out with it, he tells himself.
“Do you think friends celebrate Valentine’s Day?” he asks.
“That’d be a bit unusual.” Remus says.
Sirius’ heart drops.
“It’s for couples.” James says, nodding, which is somehow supposed to encourage him but does the opposite.
Sirius’ shoulders sag.
“Why are you asking?” Remus asks.
“No reason.” Sirius says and steps over to hide the flowers from Remus’ view. He hopes they didn’t notice them before.
Something flickers Remus’ eyes.
“Are those from your admirers?” he asks.
Sirius’ cheeks burn. If he denies, he’ll have to answer even more questions, but if he agrees, he is lying. As if he would ever keep those slimy roses.
So he shrugs, stepping backward, and trips over the box of chocolate, landing on the bed.
Remus’ gaze follows him and Sirius can’t decipher what that look is supposed to mean.
He stuffs the mixtapes under his pillow.
Damn it.
Why did he think this was a good idea?
“How about a game of truth?” James says, interrupting Sirius’ despair. “We are so single, we need some fun today. A distraction.”
Peter peeks into the room. “Truth or dare?”
James grins. “Wormtail! Join us in a game.”
Peter sits on the floor next to the other two.
“Come on, Padfoot.” James says, patting the empty space between him and Remus.
Hmm.
Sirius likes that idea. If he can’t be Remus’ Valentine, he can at least still get to kiss him.
He jumps from his bed and grabs the empty beer bottle from his nightstand.
“Let’s go!” he grins.
James begins and luckily, the bottle stops spinning right when it’s pointing at Sirius.
“Padfoot!” he says. “Truth or dare?”
Sirius doesn’t contemplate. “Dare.”
James hums, thinking for a moment. “How about you steal McGonagall’s-”
Sirius’ gasps. “Wow, I can’t believe I have to kiss Moony.”
Remus next to him chokes on nothing.
“Padfoot, I didn’t-” James starts.
“Oh my.” Sirius fans himself. “This is going to be so embarrassing. I can’t believe you are making me do this.”
Peter buries his face in his hands. “Every damn time.”
“Sirius.” James says. “You really don’t have to-”
“You guys are so crazy.” Sirius says. “Okay, here I go.”
(When Sirius kisses him, Remus isn’t surprised at all.
This has happened before.
This is nice.
But he really wishes Sirius would have asked him out.
Really good friends can go on Valentine’s dates. And on regular dates.
He sighs into the kiss.)
5. Seventh Year
Sirius is dead tired when his alarm wakes him in the morning but he drags himself out of bed. He throws his coat over his shoulders and slips in a pair of clogs. He shuffles downstairs, leaving the Gryffindor dorms, and heads to the kitchens. The house elves giggle at him when they see his bed head but they eagerly prepare a cup of hot chocolate.
Sirius takes the mug and makes his way to the Hospital Wing. It takes all of his concentration to not spill anything. He doesn’t have his wand on him to clean up any mess he could make. (It’s just too early to remember things not related to Remus.)
Once he arrives he reaches for James’ Invisibility Cloak in his enlarged pocket. It takes a while and he nearly drops the cup twice. Eventually though, he is hidden underneath the magical cloak and sneaks inside.
Remus is the only patient and the white curtains are drawn close around his bed. Sirius slips through, checking for Madame Pomfrey but she isn’t there.
His friend’s nose is buried between the pages of a book. (Of course he is awake at this ungodly hour despite not sleeping all night.)
“Hi.” Sirius whispers.
The book falls from Remus’ hold and big eyes search the room. Sirius carefully sets the mug down on the bedside table and takes off the cloak.
“Madame Pomfrey will hex you.” Remus scrunches his nose. “And don’t scare me like that!”
Still, he takes the cup and gulps down its content.
“She’d never hex this face.” Sirius says, grinning, and snatches the book. Remus puts the now empty cup back on the table and pouts, reaching for the book but Sirius just laughs and sits down at his side. He scans the words on the pages before he starts reading them to Remus.
The werewolf leans back into the pillows, giving in and closing his eyes. Slim but warm fingers slide between his own. Sirius stays until Remus drifts away.
When Remus wakes again, the sky is coloured in a pretty red and orange clouds are hovering over the horizon. He watches the sun set and the night fall. The first stars begin to twinkle. He has slept the whole day and it feels good . For once, he is thankful for Sirius. (Just this once.)
Tomorrow he’ll have to go back to class.
“Moony!” a voice whisper-shouts next to his ear.
Remus sighs but a prickling feeling blooms in his chest. “Sirius? Why are you here again?”
The other appears next to him, a big smile on his face.
“I don’t want you to be lonely.” he says and fixes Remus with an expected stare.
“You want to spend the night here?” Remus asks.
Sirius nods vigorously.
Remus shakes his head in exasperation before throwing back the covers and letting Sirius crawl under them. The latter settles on Remus’ shoulder, arms and legs wrapped around his body like an octopus. Remus feels weirdly warm. Butterflies are dancing in his belly. He doesn’t fall asleep, stroking Sirius’ long curls instead and listening to his breaths slowing down.
The next morning, Sirius Black saunters into the Great Hall. His hair is in a messy bun and his tie is as loose as it can be. He plonks himself down at the Gryffindor table and everyone just stares.
His neck is covered in bruises, fresh and red, glistening on his skin.
He grins brightly, tilting his head as if to give everyone a better view.
The girls in the Hall are eyeing each other. You can basically hear them accusing each other of spending the night with the Black, and jealousy is rippling through the air.
Minerva McGonagall stares from the Head Table for a moment before averting her eyes. She, for once, can’t think of any rules Mr Black might have broken but - dear God - should this be allowed?
James Potter walks in, hand combing through his hair, throwing Lily Evans a kiss. Then, his gaze lands on Sirius and he raises his eyebrow before smiling.
“Merlin.” he says. “Remus, got a bit carried away, did you?”
Minerva McGonagall’s eyes snap to the student sitting across from Sirius who is just sitting there, as red as a tomato.
(Maybe it’s embarrassing and someone’s laughing but Remus is kind of pleased with himself.
He remembers waking up, just over an hour ago and pulling back Sirius’ curls.
“Are you sure?” he whispered and the other giggled. “Yes.”
And then he tied back the black hair into a pretty bun and buried his face in Sirius’ neck.)
+1. Grimmauld Place, somewhere along 1994 or 1995
Remus is not the same person Sirius knew all those years ago.
But somehow he also hasn’t changed at all.
He still has those beautiful hazel eyes that tell Sirius whether he is happy or upset or angry.
He still has those honey brown curls that Sirius buries his fingers in.
He still has that deep voice that sends shivers down Sirius’ back.
And Sirius’ feelings for him haven’t changed either.
That burning desire and prickling love are still there.
They are what kept him alive. What keeps him alive.
He sits down on the couch, a bottle of liquor in his hand. He places two shot glasses on the table and fills them to the brim.
Remus is sprawled in the armchair across. He is wearing some of his old clothes, a colourful dress shirt with the top buttons undone and flared trousers.
He looks good.
“That vodka?” he asks, putting the books he has been reading aside.
“Yeah.” Sirius offers him one glass.
Remus sniffs. “Straight?”
Sirius frowns. “No. Been gay for a while now.”
Remus blinks before snorting. “The vodka, Padfoot. Not you.”
“Oh.” Sirius feels the warmth rising to his cheeks. “Yeah.”
Remus chuckles and raises the glass, clinking it against Sirius’. “Cheers.”
“Cheers.” Sirius chugs down the content. It burns in his throat.
They don’t get drunk. Sirius isn’t even sure he is tipsy.
At some point though, Remus crawls over to the couch and curls into Sirius’ side.
For the first time in a while (a bit more than a decade), Sirius feels warm. The coldness that settled in his bones slips away.
“You know.” Sirius exhales. “I loved you back then.”
Remus freezes at his side.
“Like love-love. More-than-friends love.” Sirius says. “Like love-of-my-life love.”
“Back then.” Remus says. “Back then you loved me? You loved me? You loved me ?”
For a moment Sirius’ heart stops. His lips twitch. “Now too. I still love you.”
Remus stares at him with wide, sparkling eyes. They have the same charm as they did fifteen years ago.
“Probably always.” Sirius says and dares to hope.
His heart races when Remus leans in and suddenly his lips are on Sirius. There is nothing heated about the kiss. It’s soft and slow, chaste and shy. Sirius hums, cradling Remus in his lap.
Warmth pools in his chest and makes his skin tingle.
Remus eventually breaks away. “You took your time.”
Sirius’ face splits into a gigantic grin. “You love me too.”
“Yeah.” Remus breathes. “I do.”
(The next morning, Remus wakes up, lying on top of Sirius. There’s a broken vase on the floor. The last evening Sirius had bumped into the dresser while carrying a sleepy Remus to bed and the vase had fallen.
He sighs.
“Moony?” Sirius’ voice is muffled from underneath him.
“Tell me those three little words.” Remus says.
“I love you.” Sirius grunts.
“That’s sweet.” Remus smiles. “But try again. Everyone’s coming over today.”
Sirius huffs. “I will behave?”
“There we go.” Remus nods and kisses Sirius, uncaring of their morning breath. “I love you too.”)
(Four years later, Sirius cradles a baby in his arms, tears running down his cheeks.
“Sirius.” Remus says. “Tell me those three little words.”
“I will behave.” Sirius says seriously, his voice choked with tears.
“Not those.” Remus huffs, crossing his arms.
Sirius smiles. “I love you.”
Remus grins. “I love you too.”)