Chapter Text
It had been a bad day. Nora had barely gotten more than three hours of sleep for a few nights in a row so keeping her eyes open was a challenge to say the least. Her teachers in school seemed oblivious to her inner struggles so they picked on her continuously, as she was an easy target knowing how far behind she fell compared to everyone else.
The last year of school she had found a way to sneak out of her least favorite subjects. The teachers would notice she wasn’t there but their scolding later brought her way less agony than actually attending the lessons so the choice was easy. Best part was her parents didn’t know she was doing it, so she allowed it to herself once again today, quietly sneaking back home, tiptoeing her way in to not alert anyone of her presence.
Nora wasn’t someone who ever secretly listened in on others’ conversations but on her way to her room something made her stop in her tracks, hiding behind the nearest wall - someone was talking in such thick resentment the hairs on the back of her neck stood up.
“She is weak. We have raised a disappointment unfit for the title of a God. Someone like her could never rule Dyminia, let alone Gradum!”
Immediately she felt every hair on her skin stand up, her body prickling with energy and dread but she couldn’t move forward as if her feet were bound by a spell. Her mother was talking about her.
“It is not too late to change her yet, Delia. We must send her there. Pacu’s magic will fix her.”
Her parents’ voices were as sharp and loud as ever but nothing could’ve prepared her for what was said by her father. Pacu was a demigod exiled far away from their society for practicing magic of souls. A long time ago he’d turned on one of his students’ and took away their sense of self. He could easily break and reshape whoever he wanted and they’d never be the same again.
She knew her parents hated her for being different from others but this was something else completely, she never let herself imagine they’d go this far, after all they were still her parents. But her duties seemed too great in the shadow of family, they were willing to make her into an emotionless puppet only to continue the traditions once put in place by their ancient ancestors.
Tears trickled away on her cheeks, she hadn’t even noticed she began crying. By this point the urge to flee away from this horrific place was the only thing on her mind. Nothing would ever be as bad as this, no loneliness or sorrow would be as awful as losing oneself forever.
Nora took a deep breath and silently snook away to her room. Every cell of her body screamed at her in alert to run away and quickly. It wouldn’t be safe here but she could hide away for a while in the human world, the only place she knew there was the forest she visited once secretly when she was little.
——————
A smell of sweet sap and rain filled her senses. The tall trees seemed to sing their own song as raindrops fell on their thirsty leaves, happy to be nourished by the sky. Under the dark clouds and the shadow of the woods it was more difficult to see around her but she could hear the forest as if it was a living breathing organism. Unlike the last time she was here she couldn’t hear birds chirping but the rustle between the bushes and leaves had a distinct sound that gave them away. Somewhere far she could also hear a splashing stream and a group of larger animals wandering around.
Nora took off her shoes and stepped into the rain. Back home this would’ve been unacceptable as this would make her dirty but she pushed those thoughts away, the rules of Gradum didn’t apply to her here anymore. The soil under her was cold and slippery, and the grass tickled her feet. Quickly she became soaked like everything else around her and she sighed in relief. A sense of comforting peace, a feeling of eutierria took over her as her mind drifted away into a strange kind of sleep she’d never felt before. Nora became one with the woods and everything disappeared.
Many days and nights passed. For someone as young and weak as her, the amount of power it took to travel alone through the realms to reach Dyminia completely sunk her out. The sleep she fell into was akin to a bear hibernating, a dreamless coma she didn’t have the strength to end. All she could do was exist and breathe together with the forest as it did its best to keep her alive.
——————
The sunlight felt as if it was burning her eyes which seemed more sensitive than usual. She wanted to keep on sleeping, to fall back into that sense of peace and connection but everything was suddenly too loud and too bright which gave her no other choice than to move and slowly force her eyes open. Silently grunting out her displeasure she sat up and stretched her body, only to realize she couldn’t move her feet off the ground.
“Ahhh! What is this?!” her legs were encircled by wines and small twigs and after a short inspection her calves and feet seemed to be made of roots and…
“Wood?!” Nora shrieked. They were made of wood. Hurriedly and nervously she began shuffling around looking for a way to free herself but she couldn’t find anything of use. The wines started pulling away back into the ground and her legs slowly shifted back into the form she was used to. Looking at them with eyes as round as two suns she blinked away her surprise. That has never happened before. What a strange thing.
“Ouch!” A small rock fell on her head and suddenly Nora was brought back into reality - she was in Dyminia, she had run away from home because her parents wanted to send her away. The last memory of their voices made her chest ache and her shoulders slump. Did she make the right choice by leaving them behind? Would the pressure that she carried around with her everywhere now fall on her brother’s shoulders?
Her stomach rumbled loudly. She had no idea how much time had passed and she wasn’t hungry, she was starved. Everything looked delicious, even the tree on her right. As she imagined biting it she winced in imaginary pain, that wouldn’t be great for her teeth.
She’d once read about humans eating birds, apparently they were quite tasty. If she could catch one she’d surely be able to satisfy some of her hunger.
Nora stood up slowly, her head dizzy and legs uncoordinated. Keeping her balance seemed to be a bit of a challenge, in a state like this catching an animal wasn’t going to be easy. Nora remembered hearing a stream before falling asleep, she could have a drink first.
She carefully stumbled in the direction, keeping herself from falling by leaning on the trees nearby. By the time she reached water she was exhausted, panting heavily. She fell on her knees with a thud and lowered herself to take a greedy sip.
“Ptooey!!” She quickly spit it out, she’d almost swallowed a bug. Nora shook her head and made sure to look next time before drinking. The water seemed somewhat dirty and had a different taste than what she was used to but her thirst pushed away any thoughts. After having many mouthfuls she sighed happily and splashed some of it on her face and arms. She’d have to take a proper bath after eating.
To catch a bird she’d need a weapon. Right! She’d brought some stuff with her. She hurriedly found her way back and looked for her bag. In it there was a small knife but that wouldn’t be enough, she needed to make herself a proper hunting weapon.
With the string on her bag and a few nice twigs she found walking around Nora put together a makeshift bow and arrow. Well, calling them that was an overstatement but it had to do. She closed her eyes and focused on the sounds around her. The sun was rising towards its highest point and the forest was loud with happy chirping. All she had to do now was pick a target, focus on it and shoot.
She chose the loudest one her ears could pick up. After sneaking up and silently climbing up a nearby tree she pointed the arrow towards it. The bird was not alone, next to it was what seemed to be its partner sitting on tiny colorful eggs. The big chirpy ball of feathers was feeding its partner and snuggling up to it. They seemed so content and joyful Nora found herself not being able to release the arrow. She was taught to kill without hesitation, as human and animal lives weren’t deemed as important or valuable. She didn’t think about it twice then but now she had the chance to watch and observe them with her own eyes. Something in her said the book didn’t know everything, something said the book might’ve not told her all of it.
Nora lowered her bow. The birds caught her sudden movement and perked up. A tense moment of silence followed as both parties examined each other. The bird Nora previously planned to kill and eat opened up its wings and swiftly flew towards her. In a moment of panic she covered up her head and face with her arms, thinking it’d fight her with its sharp nails, screeching, trying to protect the eggs and its partner from a foreign predator. When it all stilled and she felt no scratching or plowing of wings she slowly opened up her eyes again and looked through her arms carefully. The bird was so close, on the branch right in front of her, moving its head left and right, trying to get a good look at her. Nora slowly lowered her arms down and looked back.
“Tweet tweet” it’s as if the bird was saying hello to her, not a shred of defensiveness in its posture. Nora laughed under her breath.
“Hi to you too, birdie.” she couldn’t stop smiling “Do you know where i could find something to eat?”
——————
Big Beak turned out to be very smart. Beaconing her to follow he showed her how to dig up worms but after trying one Nora shriveled up in disgust. Not understanding why she didn’t like them the bird seemed lost but Nora gave it back to him and asked if there was something else. After a few seconds the bird chirped again asking her to come with it.
Now berries were delicious. After trying one she couldn’t seem to stop eating one after another. They were sweet and sour, small explosions of flavor and had a pleasantly crunchy texture. As she was stuffing her mouth Big Beak seemed delighted he finally found something Nora liked and broke out in song.
The night was nearing and the sun was setting quicker than you could blink. After eating berries and a few more plants the birdie showed her, Nora came back to the stream and found a deeper place to bathe. She washed herself and her clothes, came back and changed into something warmer and more comfortable, hanging up her old ones to dry on a branch.
She made a small campfire for warmth and had thought to take a thin blanket with her. It was uncomfortable to lay on the ground but soon enough the calming sound of grasshoppers and frogs lulled her into deep slumber.
——————
Waking up in a soft bed of moss and flowers made Nora giggle. The woods seemed to welcome her with open arms, something she wasn’t really used to, but she welcomed it all back soon, not hesitating to call the place her new home.
As months passed by she built herself a small house and a crop garden. The soil bloomed all plants in record speeds so she always had plenty to eat. Her bird friends brought back many kinds of different seeds and in return she helped them with their nests and adorable baby hatchlings.
Her favorite was the walnut tree right next to her house; the nuts were delicious and its blossoms were beautiful to look at through her window. She shared all of her food with the animals that would pass by and she quickly made friends not only with all of the flora but also the fauna of the forest.
She missed her family and classmates but pushed that feeling deep inside, they didn’t deserve it after treating her this way. If she hadn’t run away, who knows what would’ve happened to her? Every time she thought of the possibilities a cold, uncomfortable shiver ran down her spine. No, she made the right choice. They never cared about her wellbeing, so why should she.
——————
There are three days in the forest she’s sure she’ll never forget.
Number one - the time she first came here a few months ago and everything was so new. The rain, the trees, the birds and berries, all of it was like meeting someone you’ll love and knowing from the beginning that you will.
Number two - Big Beak’s family’s eggs hatching. The parents’ excitement and love could be felt by everyone that day. Their mom’s especially, the tiny bird always seemed more quiet and so focused on caring for the eggs for weeks on end, she’d never leave them alone even if she was hungry, cold, upset or tired. So when the important day came she chirped louder and shined brighter than the sun. The grumpy hatchlings made Nora cackle in surprise, she’d never seen newborn birds before so she had no idea they’d be so… naked. Where were their feathers?
Number three - about a month later it was time for them to learn to fly. She could sense the parents’ nervousness, this was one of the most important days of their life. Nora was anxious as well, this was dangerous and she knew by now that the parents had to drop the kids down a sharp slope, who then had to learn the right way to flap their wings and catch the wind on their own. All six babies had done so well it made Nora cry, it was a breathtaking moment and she couldn’t have been more proud of them.
After all of that she was ashamed of herself for it but she wished more than anything she was one of the birds’ babies. She didn’t even know such pure love existed to begin with, so seeing it be given to them so unconditionally and warmly made Nora think of her past. Was there something severely wrong with her to not deserve even a sliver of that? Could she have done better, pushed herself harder for her parents to look at her the same way the birds were looking at their kids? If she’d stayed and agreed to go get treated by Pacu and his dark magic, would she have been changed into someone better, would she have been enough?
No matter how hard she tried to convince herself she made the right choice leaving them all behind her heart kept betraying her. Small things in the forest kept reminding her of them and every time it felt as if her chest was being cracked open, making it hard to breathe. She fought back tears with all her might, torn between her yelling head and crying heart.
Nora forced herself to focus on the other thing she was envious about - flying. All birds she’d seen were born with wings: big, beautiful and mighty. Watching them soar through the skies, gliding in the gentle warm wind made her wish she could do the same. Nothing seemed as peaceful, as soothing as being up there, away from the tumult of the world, away from all problems and troublesome thoughts.
Maybe if she jumped off the tall cliff like the birds did, just maybe, she’d also come back up majestically, feathery wings adorning her back, pulling up all her weight effortlessly as the wind plays with her hair, her hands grazing the softest of clouds.
It hurt, her back hurt. Which was annoying. She laughed pathetically, as if wishing alone could make the wings grow.
She’d always been pathetic. All of her family seemed to develop their powers early on, her brothers being at the top of their classes, easily mastering whatever‘s had been thrown at them. Her curse was being born first. Only if she’d been born second no one would’ve paid her attention, no one would’ve cared she couldn’t seem to find her powers, that nothing seemed to stick. She was an abomination, a cruel joke of nature and she couldn’t fight against it, only try to run away but it’d always catch up to her no matter how far she fled. She was weak.
The sky above turned increasingly darker as angry clouds started spitting violent rods of lightning. The forest seemed to still, frightened by the sudden souring of the mood. The first hit of violent thunder woke Nora up from her thoughts, she’d gotten so lost in her head everything else around her had disappeared.
It was raining again. She remembered the day she came here, the forest looked and smelled exactly the same, only it was louder. All the sounds were now packed in the powerful hits of thunder, all at once, mimicking the bright flashes of lightning that appeared right before them.
Nora wanted to feel the soil and the grass with her bare feet again like she did that day, they were calling out to her. The ground seemed to pulse and the trees were swaying, all in the same rhythm as the sky. As she gave into it, taking off her shoes, that feeling of eutierria, of belonging started to take over her again. It was an indescribable kind of feeling, nothing she’d ever felt compared to it. Instead of being pulled towards sleep, this time she felt the uncontrollable urge to sing.
As the first notes rang she couldn’t understand where the noise was coming from. It was so shrill and broken, unpleasant to the ear, all Nora wanted to do is to cover them up. Only then it hit - she was the one making the sound, unable to stop. It’s as if the forest was playing through her, answering the rest of the instruments, all in the same breath.
The symphony was building towards a climax. Her cracking voice was suddenly mended all together and her aching body began to change rapidly. As the singing came to a height it almost drowned out the ugly sound of cracking bones and tearing fabric. Everything ever was happening at once and saying it was overstimulating would‘ve been an understatement.
——————
What happened afterwards seemed like a dream. Nora had a lot of dreams of her flying and gliding so she was sure this was just another one. That didn’t make it any less fun though, and it had been a while since she’d had one. This one was just more realistic, a lot more realistic. Big Beak’s family was right next to her as well, all chirping cheerfully, celebrating the flight. It was a good dream and she wished she could stay in it forever, surrounded by the sounds of happiness, doing what she loves.
——————
“Eghlpft” this wasn’t the first time she woke up with moss in her mouth. She wasn’t usually a belly sleeper but after the whole fiasco yesterday night she probably passed out face first on the ground. Actually, what the hell happened yesterday? Nora found it hard to distinguish between where reality ended and dreams began.
Her body felt heavy and sore. All her muscles felt as if she had run a long marathon as she struggled to sit up. Rubbing away the sleep in her eyes Nora yawned loudly. She got up from the ground groaning like an old man. Why was the sun shining so brightly? She didn’t usually mind it but now it was annoying her. Eh, she just probably hadn’t gotten enough sleep. It was time to go back to her bed and take a long nap until someone or something woke her up again.
In order to not wake up fully she kept her eyes closed as she stumbled towards her little hut. After spending so much time here she didn’t need to look anymore anyways, by this point she knew the woods like the back of her hand.
After opening the door of her house she stepped in only to - bounce right off it. Confused, she tried stepping through the door frame but the same thing happened again.
“Why…” Nora didn’t understand what body part was bumping against the walls, she never had a problem getting in.
She had to open up her eyes. The door looked normal. After a few seconds of staring at it she stepped back to look at it from further away. Suddenly, a bird came out of nowhere and flew almost right into her face which caused her to stumble back and turn around. Sighing frustratedly she brushed over her face and clothes, trying to get herself together again.
“Huh?” She raised up her eyes and examined her shadow - it was way wider in her torso area. Like a puppy chasing its own tail she whipped her head back and “Ah!!” She jumped up with shock. There were wings?! Big, white, feathery wings were adorning her back. Some dirt and leaves were sticking on them, probably from spending her night on the ground of the woods, they were rather light gray because of that but that was a real, moving, warm pair of wings, her wings.
Was she still asleep? No way. After pinching herself it was safe to say all sleep had left her. The wings opened up completely and she brushed over them with her hands. They were so soft, the feathers seemed to be new and still on the weaker side, like the ones Big Beak’s children had when they first started spouting on their tiny bodies. Nora had no mirrors here but she really wanted to get a better look at them so she ran towards the nearest big puddle she could find. Then she stared at her reflection and gasped with awe “Wow…”.
——————
Accepting that this wasn’t a dream continued to be a challenge. More than anything she had so many questions: did all of this happen because of her? Or was someone else involved? Did the forest make it happen? She was sure she was hopeless, if her powers were to show up that would’ve happened ages ago…
Nonetheless a spark of hope bloomed in Nora’s chest, maybe she wasn’t all a lost cause after all. Maybe this was a beginning, the spring of her life breaking its first flowers through thick snow.