Chapter Text
The Fight
Brothers fought – it was normal. Especially triplets, three brothers that were as close as they were. They have spent their whole lives together since their births, practically attached at the hip. Sure, they had other friends – Matt himself had a best friend named Madi when he was a teenager in a Boston. Nick, the eldest triplet’s friends, were okay to Matt for the most part. They never tried to bully him or anything, but they did treat Chris, the youngest triplet a bit better than they did Matt. He truly just assumed it was because Matt was the middle child, and middle child syndrome was a real thing, right?
Anyway, brothers fight. This fight, though, this one was different. This fight made Matt run; run to the other side of the country.
It started gradually, Matt noticed. They were filming one of their car videos, Matt in the driver seat as usual, his fingers drumming on the steering wheel. His anxiety had been ramped up a bit lately, and he wasn’t sure why. “Jesus fuck, Matthew, would you knock it the fuck off!” Nick, the oldest triplet who was sat in the backseat, spat out. Matt jumped, surprised by both the loudness and the tone coming out of his brother’s mouth.
“Sorry,” Matt apologized, folding his hands in his lap, clenching his fingers together to the point of pain.
“What is with you today?” Chris added with a sigh, black beanie pulled low over his dark hair. He turned in the passenger seat to meet Matt’s eyes, and Matt couldn’t believe how annoyed his younger triplet looked.
“Wha- what do you mean?”
“Wha-Wha” Chris mocked making Nick snort from the back and Matt flinched. “Jesus, you’ve been practically mute this whole fucking video and then you can’t sit still, and now you’re gonna stutter? What’s wrong with you right now?” Chris practically demanded.
Matt didn’t understand what was happening. He didn’t understand what he did to make his brothers attack him like this. He could feel the tremors begin in his hands, and he crossed them over his chest to hid them from both the camera and his brothers. Nick let out a loud sigh, leaning forward quickly and turning the camera off.
“This isn’t going anywhere. We should just redo this one tomorrow, or something,” he suggested.
“Well, we were doing just fine,” Chris said, and Matt flinched again at Chris’ tone. He meant him and Nick and not Matt. He wasn’t doing well. He truly didn’t understand what was happening. Yes, he was quiet that day, but Nick and Chris knew he was quiet when his anxiety got high. They watched for that, they always had.
“Just drive us home,” Nick sighed. Matt nodded, putting his seatbelt back on with trembling hands and driving on autopilot. Had he said something that upset them and didn’t realize it? They would have told him, though, right? In Boston, they told each other everything. In LA, things felt different to Matt. They promised each other they wouldn’t change, that they wouldn’t become like the stereotypical influencers in California, but had they? Matt didn’t have any friends here besides his brothers. They had friends, friends that they shared and friends that were cool with the other triplet, but everyone always seemed so indifferent to Matt. Was it him? Was he the one who changed? Was he the problem?
Before he knew it, Matt was steering the car into the driveway of their house and his brothers were out of the car the second he had shifted into park. He let out a shuttering breath, turning the car off and following after them, pocketing the keys and trailing behind slowly. As he made his way up the steps and on the main floor of the house, Chris and Nick were loitering in the kitchen, talking. Matt watched them for a heartbeat, contemplating whether or not it was a good time to talk to them about what was going on, or what he did to upset them.
“Is there a reason you’re just standing there?” Chris questioned, and Matt zoned back in to see Chris staring at him with a raised eyebrow.
“I – sorry, I was wondering if we could talk?” Nick let out a dry laugh.
“Now you want to talk, but not while we were filming. You know, doing the think we get fucking paid for? Our job?” Matt’s heartbeat picked up to the point where it felt like it would burst out of his chest and the tremor came back to his hands. He decided to solve at least that problem by stuffing them in his pockets before continuing.
“I’m sorry, guys, my anxiety-”
“Always an excuse, Matty,” Chris chimed in loudly making Matt’s mouth snap shut with a click.
“Is this Gang Up on Matt Day, and I missed the memo?” He questioned weakly, stomach tightening as his panic rose with each passing moment.
“I’m so tired of your bullshit, Matthew,” Nick sighed, rubbing his forehead tiredly.
“I don’t understand,” Matt tried.
“You don’t contribute anything, Matt! To the channel, to the house! Nothing! Nowhere! You are practically useless at this point!” With each harsh word, Matt felt his shoulders get higher and higher as if they were offering some semblance of protection against the venomous words being hurled at him from his own brother.
“Have you seen some of the comments lately? There are so many people asking why we keep you around, Matt! You are so goddamn boring!” Chris yelled, slamming his palm down on the counter in front of him to get his point across. The noise made Matt jump, but Chris kept going. “I don’t even know why you stay around!”
That did it.
“You know what, Christopher? I don’t know why I fucking do either!” Matt finally exploded, tears filling his eyes. He truly had no idea what set his brothers off earlier, if maybe it was the comments on their channels about him and they just got so fed up with seeing them that they decided to say something to him in the worst way possible. “Do you want me gone? Is that it? Want me to stay off the channel and get rid of my own? Is that what you fucking want?” Matt had moved closer to Chris without realizing it, practically screaming in his face, Chris now backed up closer to Nick. A united front against Matt.
“Don’t yell at him, Matt,” Nick ordered with a snap, eyes blazing in anger, as he placed a hand out to stop Matt’s progress, making him freeze in surprise. Like Matt would ever attempt to physically hurt one of them, especially the youngest. Nick knew that, or Matt thought he knew that.
“Just leave, Matt! Get the fuck out!” Chris yelled, giving the still frozen Matt a hard shove. He wasn’t expecting it, and he wasn’t braced for it. Matt flew back, his back cracking against the corner of the kitchen island hard enough to not only make him gasp out in surprised pain but also bounce off of the island itself. He teetered to the side, balance lost completely, and the left side of his temple hit the counter opposite of the island. He must have blacked out for a heartbeat because the next time he blinked, he was on the floor, and it was almost silent in the room, the only noise he could hear was heavy breathing.
He shifted to his feet slowly, trying to figure out which part of his body he needed to be gentler with – the throbbing in his ribs that got worse every time he took a breath, or the sharp stab in his left temple that elevated when he moved his eyes in a different direction. Probably that one, now that he thought about it. When he got to his feet, he looked down at the small pool of blood now sitting where his head was just lying, and he realized that he had definitely cracked his head open on the counter. He turned slowly, seeing that his triplets were still standing there, even though it felt like it had taken him an hour to get to his feet.
They were both standing there, looking just as frozen as Matt himself did just a few moments ago. Was that only moments ago? He wasn’t really sure anymore. Nick’s mouth was hanging open, and he had one hand outstretched towards something. He was pale, much paler than usual. Chris, though, Chris was white and his blue eyes were wide. “Matt-” he started, voice cracking, but Matt was done. They had both crossed so many lines that day verbally, but then Chris had physically hurt him.
Matt was done.
“Shut up, Chris,” Matt snapped, voice sounding off, even to himself. Chris flinched back, but he didn’t have it in him to feel bad anymore. “You want me gone? Fine. I’m gone.” Matt shuffled as quickly as he could to the stairs, making his way down them as he took advantage of their frozen states to head to the car. He probably shouldn’t be driving, as he was ninety percent sure he was concussed, but, oh well. As soon as he backed out of the driveway and started driving down the road, he could barely make out the two figures of his brothers out in the streets waving their arms.
~||~
He somehow made it to the hospital safely, and as soon as one of the ER nurses took a look at him, he was brought back. They cleaned up the cut on his head, deeming it deep enough to need stitches, but also took him back for x-rays for his head and his torso to check for cracks and breaks. Thankfully, there were no cracks in his skull, but he did have three cracked ribs from the impact into the kitchen island and he would have heavy bruising for a while.
They dealt with the stitches first, cleaning the blood that had dried along his temple and trickled down the side of his face. No wonder the ER nurse had almost panicked at the sight of him. While one of the nurse practitioners was suturing his wound closed. Matt had his head tilted back, eyes closed, just trying to really comprehend what the fuck had just happened to make his life implode so spectacularly. Nick had been snappy before, even to the same magnitude he was that day, but he had never had such anger and malice just oozing from every pore.
And Chris - Chris, Matt’s best friend, his other half, had hurt him. Had physically shoved him hard enough to where he cracked three ribs and sliced his head open. He had blacked out for a couple of moments. He didn’t even remember hitting the fucking floor!
“Honey, do you need more pain meds?” The NP questioned, placing a hand on his shoulder. His eyes snapped open, and he realized that he had started trembling.
“No, no, sorry. ‘M fine,” he mumbled, settling back down. Her sweet brown eyes studied him for a long moment before she continued.
“Alright, honey, if you’re sure. Before I continue, I did receive word a minute ago that your emergency contact was called – a Nicolas Sturniolo? He said he was on his way.” A cold dread filled Matt’s entire being.
“I don’t want him here,” he blurted out, starting to feel himself panic. The heart monitor beeped louder, faster, in time with his panicking causing the NP’s eyes to widen a bit. “Please don’t let him back here!”
“Okay, okay, take a deep breath, honey,” she soothed. “I’ll keep him away once he arrives.” Matt nodded jerkily, inhaling sharply as he tried to calm himself down. If Nick was coming, Chris probably wasn’t far behind. Maybe. He seemed to hate Matt, now, so he might not show up with their oldest triplet. Matt was honestly surprised Nick was even showing up. It was probably just to save face.
She continued with the sutures, finishing up quickly, taping over sutures to keep them covered, and patting his thigh with a friendly smile. “Alright, honey, I’ll be right back with one of the other nurses so we can wrap those ribs and get you some pain meds, okay? A doctor will be in soon.” Matt nodded again, and watched her walk away, closing the curtain and closing off his area from prying eyes and giving him a semblance of privacy. Matt leaned back in his bed with a sigh, wincing at the pain in his back. He needed to leave. He wanted out of there so bad. He just wasn’t sure if his brain meant the hospital or LA in general.
The NP and two nurses were back a couple of minutes later, getting his ribs wrapped up quickly, and the nurses trailed out while the NP stayed behind. “Just to keep you updated, your brothers are here and are in the waiting room. They seemed very… annoyed.. upset, maybe, that we wouldn’t let them back,” she explained quietly. Matt didn’t care. He couldn’t care. He didn’t have the energy anymore.
“Thank you for letting me know.” She nodded, walking out, shutting the curtain again. Matt only had to wait a minute before a doctor walked in, not looking up from his clipboard.
“Matthew Sturniolo,” he recited, reading from the paper in front of him. “Twenty-one years old, three cracked ribs, laceration on head.” He looked up finally, and Matt raised an eyebrow, wondering if there was a question in there somewhere. “All of that sound correct?” Matt nodded.
“Yes, sir.” The doctor gave him a nod, and then checked over the work the nurses did.
“I want to keep you here over night for observation, and then-”
“No,” Matt blurted out, attempting to heave himself up into a sitting position.
“Mister Sturniolo-”
“I don’t want to be here anymore. Please, I just want to leave.” The doctor studied him for a moment, but sighed, seeing he was serious.
“I will have one of the nurses bring in the AMA paperwork for you to fill out before you leave. If you experience any worsening symptoms, come back here immediately.” Matt nodded. The doctor didn’t say anything else, but he did sigh in a disappointed way before leaving. It seemed Matt was disappointing everyone lately.
It only took about twenty more minutes before Matt was discharged, signing every paper put in front of him that basically told him he was an idiot for leaving and to stay put. One of the nurses from before was waiting near his bed with a wheelchair and a soft smile. “I don’t need that.”
“Sorry, kiddo, hospital rules,” the nurse said, motioning for him to have a seat. He sighed and sat down gingerly, being mindful of his ribs. A thought occurred to him, and he pulled out his phone. He had dozens of missed calls and three times as many unread messages. He ignored them, seeing that most of them were from Nick and Chris, and ordered a cab to come pick him up. “Smart,” the nurse commented, knowing what he was doing. “You shouldn’t be driving with your concussion.” Matt hummed in agreement, turning his phone off and laying it in his lap.
She wheeled him down the hall to an elevator, and the rode down to the main floor. When he was closer to the E.R. waiting room, he realized who would be there. “Wait!” He whispered, jerking in his slightly as she listened.
“What’s wrong?”
“Is there a side exit or something we can go through? My- my brothers are out there, and I don’t want to see them.” The nurse took her hands off of the wheelchair and peered around the corner to waiting room. He saw her eyes widen, probably not expecting that Nick and Chris were identical to him, and then made her way back.
“You’re good; they’re distracted.” She pushed him quickly and quietly to the front and Matt dared a look over to his left as he passed by. Chris was standing in front of a vending machine, watching as it moved to grab his Pepsi. Nick was on the phone, facing the opposite way with a tightness in his broad shoulders that spoke of annoyance. Probably annoyed that he was even called. Once they exited the hospital, Matt let out a whoosh of air out of his lungs in relief.
The nurse waited with him for five minutes until his cab pulled up. As he climbed out the wheelchair, he looked down at his phone now clutched in his hand and then dug his keys out of his pocket. While waiting, he had made a snap decision, deciding to run. He didn’t know where he was going yet, but he needed out of this city. He turned to the nurse, handing her his phone and keys. She took them hesitantly, a curious look on her face. He glanced over her shoulder, seeing Nick and Chris at the front desk and realized he needed to hurry.
“Would you please give those to my brothers? And- and tell them I’m sorry?” His voice cracked at the end, the tight hold he’s had on his emotions slipping. He and his triplets had only been separated once in their entire lives, and now here was - leaving. Leaving with no plans on returning. Her eyes softened.
“Of course,” she agreed, taking a step back. He nodded in thanks, and slipped into the back of the cab, shutting the door with a click behind him.
“Where to?” The cab driver queried, glancing at Matt through the mirror.
“To the nearest ATM first; after that, LAX, please.”
~||~
Nick sat in the hard, plastic chair in the hospital waiting room, leg bouncing as he waited for any news of his brother. He felt sick thinking about Matt; he and Chris treated the middle triplet like absolute shit earlier that day, and Nick felt horrible for it. He woke up in a bad mood that morning, the comments on their latest YouTube video making it worse. They weren’t even mean or nasty comments, just ones expressing their worry for Matt, who had been quieter lately. It pissed Nick off that complete strangers on the internet could tell that something was wrong with one of his twins when he couldn’t. He and Chris could both tell that something was bothering Matt but they talked it over and decided to give him space. Clearly, it was the wrong thing to do. Matt wasn’t getting better, his anxiety was worse and he was always lost in his thoughts. Nick was worried and upset and hurt that Matt wouldn’t talk to them – to him, so he snapped, getting more and more frustrated with Matt as the days passed.
He should’ve just talked to him, aired out his concerns. Instead, he let it fester and now – now, Matt was hurt. Watching Chris shove Matt into the kitchen counter, hearing the loud crack echo through the room at the same time as a gasp of pain left him at the impact. Hearing his head slam into the opposite counter with a sickening thud as his body fell to the floor. Nick stared, wide eyed at Matt’s crumpled form, his heartbeat so violent he could hear it thudding in his ears. When Matt lifted himself up off the ground, told them he was done, and drove away it took Nick a few moments to process what just happened. He turned towards Chris, who looked pale and honestly a bit green.
“What did I just do?” Chris questioned, big eyes turning towards Nick and filling with tears. Nick didn’t know how to answer because he wasn’t sure either. He led Chris back inside, he didn’t even remember coming outside, and deposited him gently on the couch before heading back into the kitchen. There was blood smeared on the floor where Matt was laying, and a bit on the counter, too, where his head it. Nick had to fight down the nausea trying to creep up his throat as he cleaned up the mess, trying his damnedest to keep his tears at bay. He couldn’t break down, he needed to be in the present for Matt when he returned. He hated the idea of him out there, alone and hurt. The thought alone made every protective instinct in his body flare to life and all he wanted was both of his brothers in his line of sight; safe.
It was an hour later that he got the call – Matt was at the hospital. He ordered an Uber, packing himself and an almost comatose Chris into the back of the car when it arrived. His thoughts were spinning; was Matt there because of what happened at the house? Did he get into a car accident? They didn’t stop, even when he ran into the emergency room with Chris behind him, practically throwing himself into the front desk counter. “Hi, my name is Nicolas Sturniolo, I got a call about my brother, Matt?” The nurse behind the desk typed away at her computer.
“Your brother is currently getting x-rays right now – I’ll have someone come out a talk to you as soon as they’re available.”
“X-rays?” Chris questioned from next to him, voice shaking. The nurse nodded.
“Yes, it looks like he came in with possible broken ribs and a laceration on the side of his head.” Chris pushed himself away from the desk, face paling even further and Nick came to the same conclusion – Matt was here because of what happened in the kitchen.
“Thank you, for the information. We’ll be in the waiting room if we’re needed,” Nick said, voice sounding monotone even to him. He took a seat in a chair, leaning forward and pressing the heels of his hands into his eyes hard enough to see bright white spots appear in the darkness of his vision. How did this happen?
“I hurt him.” Nick looked up, turning his head to see Chris beside him with a dazed look in his eyes. “I hurt him, Nick.”
“You did,” Nick replied, making Chris flinch. “But, he’s going to be okay, Chris. He’s Matt – we’ll talk as soon as we see him.”
“I need to apologize,” Chris groaned, leaning back in his chair. “We were so mean today. Why did we do that? Of course he’s been quieter – I’ve especially been ignoring him and why wouldn’t he be having more anxiety?”
“Breathe, Chris,” Nick interrupted before his youngest brother could really start in on a tangent. That was the last time Chris spoke for a while. Especially after a nurse found them and explained that Matt didn’t want to see them. Nick understood, he did, but that didn’t stop his heart from fucking aching at her words. Why would Matt want to see them after what they did? As the nurse walked away, Chris burrowed into Nick shoulder and he felt his shirt getting wet from the youngest’s tears.
Less than an hour later, Chris was up at a vending machine to get a Pepsi and Nick called their mom. “No, mom, you don’t need to come – we’ll take care of Matt.” If ever wants to talk to them again. “Everything’s going to be fine.” His mom finally agreed and as soon as Nick hung up, he was back at the front desk. “Hi, me again. Any word on my brother?” The front desk nurse typed in Matt’s name and then she frowned. “What? What’s wrong?” He must have sounded more panicked than he realized because Chris appeared at his elbow, looking at him worriedly.
“Your brother has been released – it looks as if he signed himself out AMA about fifteen minutes ago.” Nick’s eyes widened and he turned around to dash into the parking lot to see if Matt’s car was still there. As soon as he turned, there was a nurse approaching him pushing an empty wheelchair.
“Hi, I’m Sara, and I was the nurse in charge of your brother’s release. He asked me to give you these.” She held out her hands and Nick followed suit, gazing down at Matt’s cellphone and keys. “He also wanted me to tell you he was sorry.” Sara walked away and Nick continued to stare down at the items in his hands. The tears that he had been pushing back finally spilled over as he gasped out a sob.
Matt was gone.