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i've got you in my hands now (don't feel so low)

Summary:

"Do you really think," he huffs. "That I'd be here, with you right now if I was dating Hirakawa?"

(or: the one where tooru runs away from his feelings. literally)

Notes:

For M who requested iwaoi + running away, and gives me life by spamming my inbox sometimes.
also forgive me for spelling errors, I was low-key writing this while I had guests over.

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

The thing is Tooru loves running away. He loves the chase and all the confessions and secrets that come out with it. Hajime supposes that it sprouted from a coping mechanism that he'd taken on when he was in middle school, and turned into an odd, sadistic habit that goes on until today. So, Hajime's not surprised when he comes home to find Tooru gone.

"Tooru's not home yet." his mom comments as he walks into the house. She's cutting tomatoes and Hajime looks over her shoulder to grasp at a slice. His mother makes a squeal of protest and he grins as he pops the fruit into his mouth and chews thoughtfully. "Hajime!"

"What?" he chuckles, grabbing his mother's shoulders. She swats him with her hand before she continues to chop the vegetables. "What, mom?"

"Did you and Tooru have a fight again?"

"A fight?" Hajime snorts. "That idiot wouldn't win a fight with me even if he got the two dorks on his side."

"Hajime!" his mother scolds, and he laughs in return.

"No, we haven't, why?"

His mother stops chopping momentarily to look Hajime in the eyes. "You two usually come home together. But he hasn't come home."

Hajime snorts. "The idiot probably got lost, or maybe he's gotten into a fight with stupid Kageyama again. No big deal. He's just a baby when it comes to these things."

"Hajime!" his mother hisses.

"Hey, hey!" Hajime laughs, narrowly dodging the knife she's swinging around. "Don't worry. I'm sure he'll be home later today."

 

 

 

Except he isn't. And he doesn't show up for school the next day either, and it's all good and fine until volleyball practice comes around and Tooru still isn't there. And worse, the entire volleyball team seems to lay the blame on him.

"Where's Oikawa?" Yahaba asks the moment he walks into the gym. Hajime frowns as he takes off his shoes and pulls on his runners.

"Isn't he here?"

"If he was here, I wouldn't be asking you." 

Hajime shrugs, loosening his shoulders before he steps into the gym. "I don't know. Maybe the idiot's sick or something."

Yahaba sends him a withering gaze before he lets out a long sigh. "All right, Iwaizumi-san, but just make sure he's here tomorrow. He was acting all strange last practice."

"Last practice?" Hajime inquires, grabbing a volleyball from off the floor and spinning in his hands. "What happened last practice?"

"Someone left us to go play with the track team." Hajime resists the urge to roll his eyes as Matsukawa's arm finds its way around his shoulders. He turns his head and isn't at all surprised to see Hanamaki standing not too far behind him.

"For the last time, sensei asked me to." Hajime growls, shrugging off Matsukawa's arm in order to serve the ball. He watches as it sails over the net and lands on the other side with a satisfying thwack. "I thought you already knew that."

Hanamaki makes an amused pout. "We do, but I think that our dear captain understood it differently."

 

 

 

When Hajime said that Tooru ran away often, he meant that he'd run away for an hour at most, and not for nearly three days.  (Well two days and eight hours, but who's counting?) And now Hajime's worried, like full blown worried.

The thing is, as much as Tooru is a crybaby and annoying, he's still Hajime's best friend, and being Hajime's best friend entails that Hajime cares about him so much, even if he doesn't quite show it. 

"Come on, pick up." Hajime mutters into his phone, listening to the monotone sound of the phone ringing. "Pick up, dammit!" There's a click on the other side, followed by Tooru's annoying voicemail.

Yahoo! I'm not available right now, but feel free to leave me a message! [Oi, Shittykawa, shut the fuck up.] Mean, Iwa-chan! Anyway, leave a message at the to--

Hajime bites back a curse ad throws his phone onto his bed with a curse. He falls after it, looking up at the ceiling, muttering half-meant expletives at Tooru as he does. Moments later there's a knock at his door followed by his mother's voice.

"Hajime, sweetie. Dinner's ready if you want to come down." 

Hajime stifles a groan and closes his eyes. "Mom, sorry but I have to look for Oikawa."

His mom hums. "All right, sweetie. But if you're ready, there's somebody downstairs who wants to see you." 

Hajime stills and pushes himself up by his elbows. Frowning, he takes out his phone and scrolls through his texts, trying to find any messages from his teammates, only to find none. Skeptically, he stands up, pockets his phone and opens his door. Walking to his kitchen, he nods at his parents who eat their dinner to the evening news and he almost balks at the sight of Kageyama Tobio sitting under the kotatsu. 

It's not surprising that Kageyama looks different from the last time Hajime had seen him, but today he looks older almost. Tired. At the sight of Hajime, he straightens, and looks down at the surface in front of him, studying his hands with a sheepish glare. 

"Kageyama?" he says slowly, moving to sit across from him. He scratches his head, looking at his former kouhai with a puzzled expression on his face. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"Sorry." Kageyama grumbles. "I--Sorry."

Hajime waves his hand dismissively. "Nah, it's no big deal, I just didn't expect to see you here."

"Ah, well," Kageyama mumbles. "It's just that Oikawa-san came to Karasuno today,"

"Wait, wait, what?" Hajime sits up abruptly. "Oikawa was at Karasuno?"

Kageyama looks startled, but he nods. "Yeah, and he came to ask me about Nekoma's address and Kuroo's number." he pauses and frowns. "It was weird. He wasn't like himself. Too...happy. He also looked really tired, like he was running away from something."

"Dammit," Hajime groans, covering his eyes. "How long ago was this?"

"About an hour ago." Kageyama says, and Hajime lets out a huff of relief.

"And he's going to Kuroo's?"

Kageyama nods. "It seems so."

"Fuck," Hajime curses and he runs to the door, pulling his shoes on. 

"Wait, Iwaizumi-san!" Hajime turns to find Kageyama standing, hands balled into fists. "Um...I can text you Kuroo's address. It's on Daichi-san's phone, but Oikawa-san, he--he cares for you a lot, yeah? Just make sure that you take care of him, too."

Hajime nods numbly before he races out the door, running faster than he's ever run before.

 

 

He's twelve when Tooru first runs away. 

"Iwa-chan," he'd sobbed when Hajime had found him. "Iwa-chan, am I not good enough?"

Hajime scoffs as he watches his childhood friend from the ground. Tooru's body and stuff is ridiculously organized on the tree to create an unstable hamper. "Dumbass!" he yells, "What makes you think that?"

"I--You can't spike any of my tosses. I'm not cut out to be on the volleyball team." 

"Yes, you are."

"No, I'm not!"

"Yes, you are," Hajime says, watching as Tooru buries himself in his pile of blankets. "Don't you give me any of that crap, Oikawa. We're in middle school. The only perfect ones out there are prodigies, and even they fail, too!"

"Iwa-chan," Tooru sniffles. Hajime scoffs and turns to leave. "Wait, no don't leave me!"

"I'm not leaving you," Hajime grunts. "I'm getting my stuff."

"What? Wait no, Iwa-chan don't go!" 

Hajime does return, five minutes later, hands full of blankets and flashlights, and the two spend the night looking up at the stars.

 

 

Hajime runs into the train, not bothering to be polite and finds a seat as fast as he possibly can. Catching his breath, he closes his eyes and mutters a curse under his breath. Not long after, the train starts to move, and Hajime relaxes ever so slightly. There's a faint buzz in his pocket and he finds a text from Kageyama.

 

Kageyama Tobio:

Just type this into maps and you'll be fine.
Also, once Oikawa-san is safe at home, Karasuno's gonna beat your ass.

 

Hajime lets out a soft snort at his text and dials Tooru's number. It rings for a couple of seconds, and then his voicemail fills the speaker.

Yahoo! I'm not available right now, but feel free to leave me a message! [Oi, Shittykawa, shut the fuck up.] Mean, Iwa-chan! Anyway, leave a message at the to--

Hajime closes his eyes.

 

 

 

"What the fuck, Trashikawa!" Hajime booms, pushing Tooru into the club room. Tooru holds back sniffles as he stares at his closed fist. "He's your kouhai for Christ's sake! At least show that to him."

"Iwa-chan--" Tooru croaks. "Iwa-chan, you don't understand!"

"And what don't I understand, Shittykawa? That he's better than you? That he beats you in every way, shape and form? I get that, I can see that! But it doesn't mean that you get to push him around." Hajime hisses. Tooru pulls his hand out of Hajime's grip.

"You don't get it!"

"Fine, I don't get it, so make me understand!" Tears are steadily pouring out of Tooru's eyes. Hajime's hands move from his shoulders to his face and he looks Tooru straight in the eyes. "I care about you, Oikawa, so tell me."

Tooru sniffles and melts into Hajime's touch.

 

 

Hajime huffs as he reaches Kuroo's house. Taking out his phone he texts Kageyama a quick thanks, I got here safely before he takes a deep breath and rings the doorbell. There's a moment of odd muffled shuffling, followed by a scream that sounds like Tooru, and then the door opens, revealing an amused Kuroo on the other side.

"I was wondering when you'd get here." Kuroo muses, running a hand through his unruly hair. "Come on in, he's been pretty whiny since he came here." Hajime nods before he walks into Kuroo's home, uttering a low "pardon the intrusion" as he steps in. Immediately, he finds Tooru on the couch, a mug between his hands. He looks terrible, as if he hadn't eaten or slept in days and Hajime quickly runs up to him, taking his face into his hands.

"How are you? Jesus you look terrible." Tooru's eyes widen, as if he's seeing Hajime for the first time and he flinches away. "Why the fuck did you run away?"

"I don't want to talk to you, Iwa-chan." Tooru pouts and Hajime lets out a sigh.

Kuroo lets out a hum and Hajime turns to him. "Bokuto needs help setting up his Mario Kart, so I'll be there. Feel free to take as much time as you need." He waves at Hajime and sends Tooru a look before he walks out his door.

Hajime sighs and looks at Tooru, a frown on his face. "Oikawa, why did you run away."

Tooru looks at him for a moment before he focuses his gaze on his tea. He has a habit of fiddling with things when he's nervous, and Hajime watches as he fiddles with the mug's handle. 

"Oikawa."

"Iwa-chan, I'm happy and all that you came all the way to Tokyo to see me, but I really want to be left alone."

Hajime grunts. "No way, Shittykawa. I'm not leaving here until you tell me what's going on."

Tooru pouts. "I don't owe you anything, Iwa-chan."

"And why's that?"

Tooru's silent for a couple of minutes before he lets out a sigh. "Okay, you want to know why I ran away? Fine, I'll tell you." his fingers shake against the mug. "Last week, you weren't at volleyball practice."

Hajime snorts. "That's it? You ran away because I skipped practice? I told you, didn't I? That sensei asked me to stay after school to help them time runners?"

"No," Tooru mumbles, bringing a hand to rub at his tears. Hajime shuts up. "No, I didn't run away because of that. I ran away because Hirakawa-chan said something to me."

Hajime frowns. Hirakawa's one of the girls on the track team. "What did she say?"

Tooru shakes his head. "I can't say."

"Oikawa," Hajime says gently. Swallowing, he brings a hand up to wipe at Tooru's tears. "Oikawa, please tell me."

Tooru sniffles and looks Hajime in the eyes. "You'll make fun of me."

"I won't," Hajime urges. "I promise."

Tooru takes a deep breath before he sets the cup down on the table in front of him and wrings his fingers together. "Well, before volleyball practice that day she came up to me to tell me that you were helping out and I told her that I already knew. Then she told me to give it up, and I was like give what up, I have no idea what you're talking about.

"So she goes and she says that you were going to help out with track because you were dating her, and for me to give up on you because..." Tooru trails off and looks down at his hands. Sobs wrack his body and Hajime reaches for his hands, bringing them closer to his body. "Because you'd never like a guy. Especially not someone pathetic and worthless as me."

"Oh no, no, Tooru no." Hajime whispers, bringing Tooru's hands to his lips and pressing a kiss against them. Tooru sobs and Hajime brings him closer until he's hugging him, one hand wrapped around his waist, the other against the nape of his neck. "I--"

"It's okay, though." Tooru says quickly, pushing Hajime away and rubbing at his eyes weakly. "I've come to terms with it, and I should be back home by the end of this week. Kuroo-chan and I just had a few things we needed to discuss."

"Oikawa."

"And I'm sorry for being such a burden. You even had to come all the way here. Gah, I'm sorry for worrying you."

"Oikawa, listen to me--"

"And I understand if you want to quit the volleyball team to be with Hirakawa-chan."

"Quit the volleyball team?" Hajime repeats. "What the fuck?"

"And I'm sorry."

"Oikawa."

"I'm so sorry."

"Jesus, Tooru," Hajime hisses and Tooru freezes, staring up at Hajime with wide eyes. For a second, Hajime hesitates to evaluate his choices, but then he goes fuck it and leans forward, pressing his lips against Tooru's. There's a comical moment where Tooru doesn't know what to do, and Hajime's eyes are still opened, and it's really awkward but then Tooru kisses him back and Hajime feels his stomach flutter. He pulls away, cradling Tooru's head in his hands. 

"Do you really think," he huffs. "That I'd be here, with you right now if I was dating Hirakawa?"

Tooru blushes and looks away. "I thought that you didn't like me that way."

Hajime snorts. "That's why you ask dumbass."

Tooru laughs and presses his forehead against Hajime's. "So what now."

Hajime stares into Tooru's eyes and lets his mouth fall into a smirk as he leans forward. "I have an idea."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[epilogue of some sorts]

"Ah, I was wondering when you'd get here." Kuroo says, an exasperated look on his face. "You guys have got to stop using my house as a place for you to kiss and make up. Every time I come home, it reeks of sexual tension and you know, actual sex."

"Sorry, Kuroo-chan." Tooru apologizes as he kicks off his shoes. From the corner of his eye, he spots Iwa-chan huddled up on the edge of the couch eyes glued to the television, purposely ignoring him. "Ryou-chan wanted a couple more shots."

Kuroo rolls his eyes. "Whatever. I'm off to Bokuto's. If you guys have sex again, please don't do it on the table. Kenma doesn't want to eat here anymore." 

"No problem, Kuroo-chan!" Tooru calls as Kuroo heads out his door. Sighing, he walks over to the couch and sits on the side opposite of Iwa-chan. 

"What the hell are you doing here, Shittykawa?" he grumbles, digging into his bowl of popcorn. "I thought I told you to stay away."

Tooru giggles and presses his toes into Iwa-chan's side, making him jump. "You know, running away isn't really like you, Iwa-chan."

"Shut up, Shittykawa."

"Ryouta-chan was really sad when he heard that you don't like him, Iwa-chan." Tooru muses, watching how the actors on the screen work together to defuse a bomb. "Especially since he was going to invite us to a gala next month to celebrate the release of our movie. He was really excited to meet you, and to show both of us his boyfriend."

Iwa-chan stiffens, but doesn't say anything. Tooru lets out an exaggerated sigh. "Really, Iwa-chan. Jealousy and running away is more of my thing." he teases. "Like remember in high school?"

Iwa-chan's eyes widen and he looks over at Tooru with a horrified expression. "Don't you dare."

"You were so worried about me."

"Shittykawa, I swear to god shut up or so help me--"

"What was it you said again?" Tooru muses. "Oh yeah, wasn't it like 'do you really think that I'd be here, with you right now if I was dating--mmph!"

Iwa-chan growls and pounces onto Tooru, pinning him against the couch, one hand covering his mouth. Tooru giggles and licks the palm of his hand slowly, teasingly.

"What the fuck, that's gross Shittykawa!" 

"What?" Tooru blinks, smile turning into a full out smirk. "You weren't saying that last night when we were--"

"I'd like to keep things PG, if you guys don't mind." Tooru turns his head to find Kuroo walking around his kitchen, a pocari in his hand. Kenma stands behind him, a disgusted look on his face. "If you guys want to have sex, please feel free to use the bed, but otherwise..."

Iwa-chan turns red and flops onto Tooru's chest with a grunt. He buries his face into his collarbone and Tooru laughs, bringing a hand to play with the hairs at the nape of his neck. He grins up at Kuroo. "No, I think we're fine." 

Notes:

my thought process while i was writing this:
-fuck
-they're so gay
-what was her name again?
-oh kuroo you sly dog, er, cat

 

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