Work Text:
Ennis.
When I first saw you,
I instantly knew what type of man you were
In your eyes, I could see it
You’re part of those who hide it—
I do too—,
who deny it
I knew, Ennis.
Ennis.
We were just two boys playing cowboy, weren’t we?
I liked the way you felt against me
I liked the warmth
I liked the side I brought out of you,
the Ennis who spoke a whole damn much than usual
I liked you, Ennis.
Ennis.
Of course, I wasn’t stupid
We weren’t supposed to last
Supposed to be nothing more than one summer
Just us two, one summer
But I still wanted you back
Come back, Ennis.
The postcard was impulsive
Could you blame me?
I wanted to feel that way again
Feel that way we felt up that damn mountain…
Ennis.
I couldn’t have cared less about your wife and kids
Couldn’t have cared less about mine
You were the one I wanted
The one I wanted to come back to
The one I wanted to kiss
I need you, Ennis.
Ennis.
I tried to tell you,
it didn’t have to be like this
just forget about our wives and kids
Imagine a ranch, somewhere were men like us don’t hide
We’d always have each other’s side
Wouldn’t that be nice, Ennis?
Ennis.
I’ll admit, I’ve had my fair share of trysts
Mexico, the motels…
But can’t you blame me,
not with your stupid November,
not when this is all we have,
not when you’re the one who keeps me on this tight fuckin’ leash
all because of you
I’m tired, Ennis,
I’m so tired of this!
…
I wish I knew how to quit you.
Ennis.
Despite everything, no matter what
the leash might’ve loosened but it never left
All those men…
One of them came close to you,
I was looking for ranches just how I did with you
Though something always felt different,
told my Ma and Pa yet it kept feelin’ different
And just like you, he left
Thought I had found someone who wasn’t scared, Ennis.
Ennis.
Looks like one of the tires popped—