Work Text:
It was a normal day for Will Wood, he was just sitting in his living room, working on his new album. In particular, his new song, foot appreciation day. "Toes toes toes, let me see your toes" he sung with his melodious pipes. "Wow, today is a great day. I am Will Wood." Suddenly, somebody burst through his window.
"Chicken jockey!!!!" yelled a chubby, middle aged man with a scruffy beard as he smashed through the glass. William Woodiam immediately stood up, shock at what was standing infront of him. "...Danny DeVito?" He said, tears pooling in his eyes as a smile was painting across his face.
"No. I, am Steve." Said the jolly fat man, pulling his leg and arms up into a crane kick position, and proceeding to kick the shit out of Willy Woody. Wonky Woodle was immediately stunned by the sudden attack, falling to the ground as he got the life beaten out of him by a man twice his weight who looked like a white Keanu Reeves.
"I am Will Wood!!" He cried, as the man stopped, but only to stare outside of the broken window. Outside was a red red moon illuminating the dark sky. "T-the red red moon!!" Wee Woo exclaimed. "That moon looks pretty shallow, hal." said the man, turning towards Woke Wood, who was entranced by the moon. "It's right on the corner of front street!" said Wimble Womble as he stood up and ran to the front door.
The fat man just stood there, watching as Wink Wonk ran outside of the small house, passing by a ginger man singing for money outside the front. "When your balls don't smell like they used to b4...💔" sung the man with no soul, grabbing the mans attention. "Wow. I am Will Wood and I think this is great." he said as he put a dollar into the mans tip jar. The ginger bastard gave him a smile and a pat on the shoulder. "Oh brother, I can feel the ginger love in you, yeah? I'm a musician, yeah? Ed Sheeran, bro!" said Ed. Wise Wafer's eyes widened but darted back to the red red moon, and he ran towards it. Somehow missing the rows on oncoming traffic. The impact was great, and caused the fat man watching through the window to run down to be at his side.
"Good t-times...on front street.." were the last words ever heard from Wishy Washy.