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After Prim died and her mother abandoned her once again Katniss found no good reason to live.
She was miserable, she had no friends her age in district twelve but Peeta.
As for Haymitch he cared deeply about her and she saw what could be a father figure in him…when he was sober at least. The battle of the Capitol as well as being involved in more than his fair share of the hunger games was so taxing on Haymitch that she couldn't really blame him for drinking. Even she tried to drown her sorrows in alcohol but luckily for her being drunk made her sick and her problems seem much worse.
But when Haymitch has to take care of someone he does tend to sober up and be good to them, like how when both tributes were in the games Haymitch knew it was his responsibility to keep them alive with gifts from sponsors and various training. He was ultimately able to sober up for them. Strangely it was Peeta that made this connection that may have just saved both of their lives. Or at least made them a lot better.
Katniss was in the depths of despair, she wouldn't eat unless Peeta begged and pleaded, she wouldn't leave her house ever even to go hunting, and worst of all she began to act like her mother did, glassy eyed and oblivious to the world around her.
Having no one else to turn to, Peeta reluctantly asked for Haymitch's help. At the suggestion of Katniss needing his help Haymitch put his drink down and asked Peeta what he could do to help. Peeta's theory was confirmed
So Peeta configures a plan that would both help Haymitch stop drinking so heavily and help Katniss feel happy again or at least get her to eat.
The plan was to send Haymitch over to Katniss’s house around noon twice a week, he'd remind her to eat lunch and he'd give her company.
At first Katniss hated the idea, she didn't want anyone in her house, her safe space, the only place she could truly be herself. And she sure as hell didn't want anyone telling her what and when to eat.
But strangely after a few weeks of Haymitch coming over, Katniss started warming up to him.
At first she'd start conversations with him, purposefully be in the same room as him because honestly she liked the company and she'd ask him to stay longer. But as the weeks went on there was a shift in what Katniss wanted, she would sit on the couch next to Haymitch, her head on his shoulder, she would ask him to come every day and she would even ask him to tie her shoes for her.
Sometimes she would cry to him but it wasn't consistent, one day she would cry about how her mother gave up and Katniss had to provide for her family and that she just feels alone and that nobody really cares about her. The next day she would cry about the “kitty” not liking her, and once in a while she would go into more of a meltdown mode where she'd get upset at something like having to do the dishes and she'd stomp and yell about it, she'd hit things and herself, which Haymitch would shut down immediately and try to redirect.
It was strange that she would act like this but honestly Haymitch didn't mind, what he did mind was how Katniss’s outbursts and complete change in mood would be random, meaning that he had no idea what he was going to walk into on any given day. She could either be cleaning the house or having a fit and there really was no way of telling what the day would bring.
He needed answers and the only way to get them was by talking to Katniss.
_
Haymitch walks through Katniss’s door and sits down at her kitchen table, not bothering to take his boots off.
“Hey” Katniss mumbles, not looking directly at him.
Her hair is down and she looks to be on the verge of a mental breakdown. Nonetheless Katniss seems to be her usual self today, which means that Haymitch can pester her into giving him an answer without feeling too guilty.
“Sweetheart” he begins
Katniss turns to look at him, she looks slightly confused and rightfully so. Never during Haymitch's little visits would he initiate a conversation unless he was prodding her to eat or take her meds or something like that.
“C'mere” Haymitch pats the chair next to him.
Katniss sits down and just looks at him, for a long time she just stares at Haymitch and Haymitch stares back.
“What?” Katniss asks, finally breaking the silence.
Haymitch sighs. He knows that this is going to be a challenging question to ask and if he doesn't word it just right he may upset Katniss.
“So uh you know I've been coming over lately”
Katniss nods, fiddling with her hands.
“And at first you didn't like it but-” Haymitch stops. He rubs the bridge of his nose and starts over. “Katniss, sometimes when I come over you act real strange, do you know what I mean?”
Katniss looks up at him "No” she says with a twinge of confusion in her voice
Haymitch sighs. “You know when there were days that you would be really cuddly with me and you'd ask me to do things for you like tie your shoes or braid your hair, things that you are not only fully capable of but refuse to let other people help you with”
Katniss’s face turns bright pink
“Now do you know what I'm talking about sweetheart?” Haymitch pushes
Katniss, who has since found her eyes to be glued to the table, nods her head.
“Can you tell me about it?” Haymitch asks
Katniss, whose face is now beet red, decides that lying to Haymitch would do no good for either of them, so she tells him the truth.
“Since the first games were over, I found myself having difficulty adjusting back to life in district twelve. I was scared of other people and what they could do to me, some days more than others. During that time I also got into a habit of choosing “Safe people” or in other words people that I deemed would protect me if I let a more vulnerable part of myself show. So I would allow myself to be more relaxed and needy around them, like Johanna and even Gale before he-” Katniss stops abruptly, feeling the pain all over again of her closest friend killing the person she cared the most about in this life.
Haymitch clicks his tongue. “So why do you get so clingy and babyish?”
“Childhood trauma I guess” Katniss shrugs. “After my father died, my mom gave up and I had to fend for our family, I was eleven when he died though so I don't know what makes for the babyish stuff” Katniss sighs
“Was your mom good to you before your dad died?” Haymitch asks
“Not really” Katniss admits. “She used to get really mad over nothing and she'd take it out on me and Prim when my father was at work so he couldn't stop her, it was always really scary” Katniss mutters.
“So let me get this all straight” Haymitch starts. “You sometimes act babyish around me because you didn't have a good childhood and you trust me that much?”
“I think so” Katniss states. “I can't really make much sense of it either”
Haymitch chuckles.
“So you're not mad at me?” Katniss asks
“Of course not sweetheart” Haymitch says in a soft voice.
Katniss darts out of the kitchen leaving Haymitch quite confused but of course in less than a minute Katniss comes right back.
In her hands she holds a pink baby blankie that has been clearly loved but still in good condition and a black hair tie.
Haymitch pats his lap, Katniss moves over and sits on his lap.
“So what's all this?” Haymitch asks
“My blankie” Katniss says confidently before realizing her mistake and blushing.
“No need to be embarrassed kiddo” Haymitch reassures.
“My dad gave it to me when I was little” Katniss continues.
“And I assume the hair tie means that you want me to braid your hair?” Haymitch asks even though he already knows the answer.
Katniss nods and giggles.
Haymitch takes the hair tie from Katniss and starts braiding her hair. While Haymitch isn't very good at braiding he tries very hard to make it look nice. Katniss isn't very good at staying still so it makes the task a lot harder.
After doing what he considered a good enough job with her hair, Haymitch turns Katniss around and kisses her on the forehead.
“I love you sweetheart” Haymitch says
“I love you too Papa”
