Work Text:
It started out as a rough cough, while Tony was trying to fix some casings on the Iron Man armor. Bruce noticed it when he came up to Tony's lab to ask if he could help design something for him. He stopped in the doorway, and watched Tony hunch over after a hacking cough, making a pained moaning sound. He frowned and put his tablet on one of the tables near the door, “Tony, are you okay?”
Tony just made another pained noise and mumbled something towards the floor, curling up harder under his workbench. He fell to the side, which mostly just ended in him laying on the floor in a ball, but he made a pained noise like he’d been shot.
“I believe, Sir said, ‘If I get up, I’ll throw up.’ Before falling over.”
Bruce frowned, nodding. “Thanks Jarvis. Okay, Tony. I think it’s time to get up and go to bed. You need some help?”
Tony just whined on the floor, turning away from his voice. Can’t they just let him die in peace?
Bruce frowned harder. “Tony, either let me help you to bed, or I’ll get Rogers or Barnes to carry you there, and you know how much it amuses Bucky when you get hurt.”
Tony lifted his head just enough to say, “Bucky is a jerk, don’t let him take pictures of me.” And immediately regret it, curling up again with another moan. “I’m gonna puke. I hate this.”
Bruce knelt next to the whining engineer and ran a soothing hand through his hair. “I know, being sick is awful.”
Tony whimpered, “You can’t even get sick anymore!”
Bruce nodded, “I know that, but that doesn’t mean I don’t know what it’s like. Tony, you need to go up to bed. I’ll even help you there, you just need some sleep.”
Tony nodded, slowly starting to uncurl before tightening into a small ball again, “No no, please no, if I get up I’ll puke, please don’t. When I got sick as a kid, it always got so bad they had to put me on anti-nausea medication, please don’t make me get up. If I start puking, I just won’t stop.”
Bruce made a few cooing noises, still soothing down Tony’s hair while he mentally went through some good anti-nausea medications. He didn’t actually have any of them on hand, but he knew how to make them. He wasn’t this smart for no reason. He’d spent more than his fair share taking care of people in other countries who needed doctors, here he at least had an actual lab to work with.
“Jarvis, thoughts?”
“Sir needs rest, and fluids. I believe though, that getting him up now, and dealing with any fallout at this moment, would be best. Once he is in bed, I can give you a suitable tea to make that would do him good right now.”
Bruce nodded, suddenly remembering that Jarvis probably knew just about all the same tricks that Bruce did, having a super powered brain and access to just about every mom-blog for sick children ever.
“Okay Tony, do you think you can at least make it to bed without getting sick, or do I need to get a bucket?”
A low upset moan was his only reaction.
***
Getting Tony up to his room was easier said than done, but once Tony was angrily curled up in a ball under his covers, grumbling to himself like an upset child, Bruce went one floor down to the communal floor with the rest of the Avengers. He entered the kitchen to get started on what Jarvis insisted was a soothing, everything a sick person needs, tea, but sounded more like a gross concoction of herbs to Bruce, and found it already mostly full.
“Bruce! You’re alive! And… out of the lab at an oddly normal hour? Didn’t you sleep last night though?”
Bruce rolled his eyes and moved around Bucky at the stove so he could put on a kettle. He could have just done this on Tony’s floor, but he didn’t keep much actual food up there, and everything was canned or boxed to last longer.
Made sense on why he didn’t actually eat up there, Tony Stark was an oddly healthy eater.
“I’m fine thanks. No one human should go up to Tony’s floor for a few days though. He’s sick.”
“Shit, what?”
Bruce looked over to see someone he hadn’t noticed at first looking at him in horror. Rhodey looked pissed for a second before going back to looking upset. “Tony’s sick. Me and Jarvis just think it’s the flu, I suggest you don’t go up-”
Rhodey shook his head, “I get more than enough flu shots, I’ll be fine. Tony always forgets to get his, and then wonders why he’s puking every three months like clock work.”
He packed up what looked like paperwork and shoved it back into a briefcase. He must have taken work back home with him so he wouldn’t be stuck on base for three days trying to do it there.
Tony complained more than enough that Rhodey took work home with him so he didn’t actually have to deal with Tony once he was there, but it was easy to tell that Tony prefered it that way so he’d get to see his boyfriend more than he would otherwise.
He nodded though, going back to mixing a slightly odd smelling batch of tea leaves that would last a few pots of tea. It was iffy on how much he would actually get Tony to drink though.
“Tell him I’ll be up as soon as his tea is ready.”
Rhodey nodded and headed back towards the elevator.
***
When Bruce came back up to Tony’s floor, he had Steve bringing an extra tray behind him full of food so he could try and coax Tony and Rhodey into eating something that night. Steve left the tray and went back towards the elevator while Bruce went on to the bedroom.
He paused in the doorway upon hearing Tony and Rhodey’s voices though.
“Daddy, I don’t want the icky tea. Jarvis makes it every time-”
“And it helps every time. Lay back down, bug, you need to stay in bed.”
Tony let out a whining noise and let Rhodey push him back against the pillows. It seemed, now that his stomach was empty, he didn’t feel as bad as he did earlier.
“Oh!”
Bruce put a gentle smile on his face, and came into the room with the tray, placing it on the bedside table before sitting down next to Tony on the bed. He reached out a hand and laid it on Tony’s forehead, ignoring the odd looks he was getting from both of the other men.
It wasn’t his place to judge. And anyways, who the hell was he to judge the first actual friend he’s had since he’d gotten turned?
“You’re a bit hot, but not as much as I’d expect for someone who’s thrown up that much.”
Rhodey nodded, “It’s why when Tony gets sick it’s such a cause for worry. His immune system is shit on a regular basis, but when he’s got the flu, the only time his temperature goes back down, is right after he’s thrown up.”
Tony frowned, looking to the side at the steaming tea pot on the tray. “I’m hungry.”
Bruce frowned, “Are you sure? You were complaining, no less than ten minutes ago, that you were going to be sick.”
Tony nodded, “I’m all empty inside. I need something to eat.”
Rhodey sighed and got up, “It’s best to give him something after he’s sick, otherwise, he feels too bad the whole time to try and eat anything at all.”
Tony nodded, sagging tiredly as Rhodey left the room. Bruce could hear him getting plates down in the kitchen though, and knew he found the tray of food there.
“Are you going to be mean now?”
Bruce’s eyes went wide and he gave Tony a horrified look, “What? Mean about what, Tony?”
Tony shrugged, “Because I call… I call him that?”
Bruce’s face fell into a slightly sad mask. “Tony, I will never judge you for that. I know it must be nice, having someone take care of you, and you need and deserve that.”
Tony’s brows furrowed, and Bruce was hit with the sudden realization, that the man in front of him, was deep in headspace. “Even though I call him Daddy? Some people think that’s weird.”
Bruce frowned, “ Some people need to mind their own business. As long as both of you are happy and consenting, I don’t see what’s wrong with it.”
Tony nodded, looking away as Rhodey came back into the room with food now. “Daddy, I’m cold.”
Rhodey set the tray down on the other bedside table, with a quick glance towards Bruce, who didn’t seem disturbed in the slightest. “You want your jammies, bug?”
Tony nodded, one hand fisted in the blankets on his lap, and eyes wide. “Footie jammies, Daddy.”
The look that Rhodey gave him, was so damn fond, that Bruce couldn’t help but hold back a small smile. Rhodey looked back over at him and then glanced at the tea. “There are bottles in the kitchen, and he’s always been more receptive towards those-”
“Say no more.” Bruce got up with a genuine smile, taking the tray back into the kitchen with him.
After a quick look through the cabinets, he came across an assortment of bottles and sippy cups, all delightfully colourful and childish. He couldn’t hold back the smile on his face as he pulled out a bottle with Iron Patriot and Iron Man’s faces both on it. This amused him way too much. Not in a bad way, but more like, in a ‘wow, this is so cute I might die’ way.
The tea was finally starting to cool off, and so he poured it into the bottle, frowning at the odd colour of it. It wasn’t green tea… why did it look green? He shook his head. Rhodey said that Tony drank the tea every time he was was sick, and it helped, so he was just going to have to trust that the AI knew what it was doing.
He found a bottle warmer in the back of the cabinet, but ignored it for now, the tea being hot enough already. He might need it later though, if he could convince Tony to take another bottle of it.
He sighed at his own thought process, and nearly jumped out of his skin when he heard footsteps behind him. “Sorry, didn’t mean to startle.”
Bruce shrugged, setting the bottle down next to the tray, and turning back around the face Rhodey. “You know I don’t judge, right? Really, if this is what helps, that’s perfectly fine with me. I’m not even phased by it.”
Rhodey nodded, leaning against the other counter, “That’s good. I’d hate for one of Tony’s best friends to have an accident .”
It was clearly a threat, but Bruce couldn’t help but roll his eyes, “What are you gonna do? Stage a lab explosion? In a building full of vulnerable civilians who will probably die, and end up not killing the one person you meant to?”
Rhodey got a small smile on his face, but was interrupted from answering. “When I have accidents, Daddy says it’s cause I forgot to put on my pull ups, but Daddy put me in a diaper, so I won’t have any. Does Bruce have accidents too, Dada?”
Tony came into the room on unsteady feet, attaching himself to Rhodey’s side. He was wearing blue footie pajamas, and holding a soft white stuffed bunny rabbit. “No, bug, I don’t think Bruce has accidents. But you shouldn’t be up anyways. Dada told you to stay in bed, baby.”
Tony rolled his eyes, looking over at Bruce. “Can I have my bottle now? It makes my tummy feel better.”
Bruce nodded and checked the bottle’s outer temperature on his inner wrist. He knew that he didn’t actually need to check it for an infant temperature, since Tony was an adult, but he did need to make sure it wouldn’t burn his hands to hold it. He handed the bottle to Tony and noticed something on Tony’s forehead, under the unruly curls. “Tony, is that a temperature sticker?”
Tony nodded. “It is. Daddy uses them when I feel icky because sometimes, Jarvis’ infrared doesn’t work when I’m all wrapped up in blankies. This one’s shaped like a bug!”
Rhodey smiled, leaning over to press a kiss to Tony’s forehead, “That’s because you’re Daddy’s little bug, now, back to bed with you!”
Tony pouted, but headed back into the bedroom, head tilted upwards so he could drink the odd looking tea as he went.
Rhodey sighed, looking back at Bruce. “Can you come back tomorrow and give him a full check up? Normally I like to get him into the doctor’s when he’s sick, and that’s never been easier since we literally live in a building with a full medical lab of them, but no one know’s he’s little, and it’s a lot easier to get him checked when he’s still tiny. Makes him much less likely to fight you about it.”
Bruce smiled, “Sure…”
“You look curious.”
Bruce rolled his eyes upwards, “Again, I’m not judging, but I do have questions. Unfortunately, I’m too freaking polite to ask any.”
Rhodey sighed, “If you want to know why-”
“I don’t!”
Rhodey paused, looking incredulous, “You don’t?”
Bruce shook his head, “No. That one seems kind of obvious, don’t you think? People do things, because they like them. Because it makes them feel good. Because they got curious. Because they want to. That’s the question that I’m not wondering, because it doesn’t matter why you do it, only that neither of you are hurting anyone, and it’s what you want to do.”
Rhodey looked down, eyes suspiciously big, and Bruce was going to ignore the wetness in them. “I… thanks? What questions do you have, then?”
Bruce shrugged, leaning back against the counter. “How old is he?”
Rhodey smiled for a second. Okay, these were the questions he liked getting. “Uh, right now, I’d put him at about two, maybe three? It’s a bit big for him, though. I think he’s a little off-put by a new adult there with us.”
Bruce nodded, “Who else knows?”
“Pepper and Happy, since they’ve been with us for so long. Happy is his favorite babysitter when he’s around, and Pepper always has a new present for Tony when he comes to see her. Of course, they’re both back in Cali right now, running SI from their main branch, but they’re going to be back in a month for some functions. The bots all know of course. You’d think it’d be dangerous to leave a baby with them, but it’s more like leaving a baby with puppies. They need to be watched, but they’re overall harmless and entertain him very well.”
Bruce smiled, “That’s… oddly endearing. No one else?”
Rhodey shook his head, “Never had any need to let anyone else know, and I’m pretty sure that Tony doesn’t mind you knowing.”
Bruce smiled, “Well, I wouldn’t exactly call this normal, but normal is a relative term that shouldn’t actually apply to the majority of humans. Instinct has long been bred out of human beings, and because of that, the majority of-”
“Please don’t make my brain hurt, I’m going to be caring for a sick Tony for the next few days, I don’t need any help getting a headache.”
“Sorry, what I mean, is that I think it’s a good thing. If this is what both of you want, there’s nothing anyone can say to convince me that it’s not what’s best for you. Goodness knows, I think that man could benefit from a second childhood on a healthier level.”
Rhodey grinned, “Yeah, he does seem more relaxed when he’s playing. I think it’s good for him at least.”
“Dada! You come back to bed now?”
Both of them turned to the doorway of the bedroom, but it was empty, Tony’s voice coming from further inside of the room. “I’m being summoned. You should go get some sleep now, he might feel good enough to be cranky tomorrow.”
Bruce nodded, leaving while Rhodey went back to the bedroom to cuddle his baby.
***
The next morning, Rhodey came down to the communal kitchen to make breakfast -also, to call Pepper and ask her to stock the penthouse kitchen with something that needs a fridge, because if he was going to be here for the next few months, he wasn’t going to live off of granola bars and Dummy’s smoothies like Tony did. Most of the others were already in there, since most were either super spies, or super advanced people who didn’t sleep much.
“What’s with you, grumpy? You look like someone stepped on you to wake you up.”
Rhodey gave Clint a large frown. “You’re correct. Tony climbed over me to get out of bed, and damaged some important parts. Now he’s demanding breakfast because he emptied his guts in the bathroom.”
Clint’s nose wrinkled up, and Thor frowned at Rhodey. “That’s gross. He doing any better than yesterday?”
Rhodey shook his head, raiding the fridge, taking out a second gallon of milk and various fruits and veggies to pile onto one of the trays to take up to his and Tony’s floor. They had more than enough, and he’d like to not have to leave to come back down every time Tony wanted a snack. He’d actually been looking forward to a quiet day of mind numbing paperwork in their living room while Tony spent some much needed little-time playing with his toys and watching cartoons. They could both use the time to relax, even if Tony was feeling like crap. Actually, that was usually the best time to relax.
“No, he’s not any better than yesterday, but his fever isn’t going up any, and to be honest, he’s actually doing better than he normally is when he’s sick.”
Clint nodded, going back to trying to steal bacon from Phil’s plate, who did not look amused.
“The tea help him?”
“Ugh, that questionable stuff Jarvis was telling you to mix last night?” That was Steve, who had taken one sniff of the tea mixture and nearly lost his dinner too.
Rhodey nodded, “Jarvis has someone make it every time he’s sick. It actually does help his stomach, and if he doesn’t drink it, we have to take him to the hospital because he can’t keep anything down without it. When he gets sick, it hits him like a brick to the face.”
Bucky frowned, “I’ve been hit with those before. I don’t recommend.”
Clint frowned, looking over at Bucky. “...anyways. Is he going to be okay, or can we plan his funeral? He once told me that he wanted us to play Crazy Frog at his funeral so he could annoy people even after he’s gone.”
Rhodey just sighed and lightly pressed his forehead against the fridge door, deciding to take a package of bacon from the fridge in punishment for that horrible statement.
Actually, that sounded like something that little Tony would say.
Maybe Tony wouldn’t mind Clint knowing either…
“He’s fine. Don’t plan any funerals yet. I’m going back up to our apartment, and if anyone wants to come in, wear a surgical mask please. I may get my flu shots on time, but the only actual reason I’m not afraid to be around him, is because he’s the only one sick. Just because you’re a super soldier, doesn’t mean you can’t carry germs. That’s one health talk I don’t want to have with any of you.”
Rhodey tried picking up the tray and frowned when that was just a little too awkward to work, and sighed, setting it back down and going into the hall closet where he knew he’d at least find canvas bags because Tony hated plastic with a loathing.
He paused in the doorway to the room, and grabbed one more canvas bag, filling it with cleaning supplies.
He would need to disinfect just about everything after Tony had touched it, and need to change the sheets, but he knew they at least had new sheets upstairs.
He came back out, and into the kitchen again, where Steve helped him load up the bags with the fridge contents. “Pepper says she’s sending over a grocery shipment, a bit early I know, but Tony keeps basically nothing in our apartment when I’m not in town, just take whatever you guys are running low on and send the rest up to us, we really don’t need that much.”
Rhodey stepped away from the counter with the bags in hand and gave them all a stern look. “No one do anything stupid.”
***
When he got back up to the penthouse, he checked up on Tony before going to make them breakfast. “Hey, bug, you feeling okay?”
Tony nodded absently, tinkering with his tablet. “Yeah, Dada. Auntie Pepper says she’s sorry that I’m sick, and she got me a new stuffed bunny.”
Rhodey gave a faint gasp of shock. “A new bunny? Little boy, don’t you have enough of those by now?”
Tony had an amazing stuffie collection, but he had a secret addiction to bunny stuffies. It was precious, to be honest. This year, for Christmas, he said he was getting Pepper a giant stuffed one, and Rhodey was trying not to think about it, because Tony actually had a not-so-good reputation of bad gift giving, but Rhodey knew that Pepper would pretend to love it anyways.
Tony frowned, “Never ‘nough bunnies, Daddy.”
Rhodey nodded knowingly, “My bad, little one. Dada’s brain turned off for a little bit.”
Tony nodded, “Yeah, I can tell. You making breakfast?”
Rhodey nodded, moving into the kitchen. Jarvis opened a comm link between the rooms, the same one that Rhodey used in place of baby monitors most of the time, so they wouldn’t have to scream to be heard. Normally, Tony loved nothing more than getting to yell and not get in trouble for it while he was little, but Rhodey knew his stomach must still be feeling icky.
“What do you want for breakfast, bug? Oatmeal, toast, eggs-”
“Sourdough toast and eggs, Dada.”
“Sourdough toast and eggs, what, sugarbug?”
There was a loud sigh, “Sourdough toast and eggs, please , Dada.”
“Coming right up, precious.”
“Thank you.”
***
The day was quiet. After breakfast, Tony moved to the living room where Rhodey had set up a blanket with some of his littler toys. Tony didn’t complain, but did give Rhodey a look like he thought his daddy was a bit crazy. Rhodey paid him no mind, trying instead to encourage Tony’s smaller side out. If Tony was to be completely relaxed, he’d need to be smaller.
Tony was laying down on his blanket after a diaper change, paci bobbing quietly in his mouth while he had his head turned to the side so he could watch Spongebob. His eyes were big, and one hand still had one of the soft baby blocks Rhodey had given him in it, and Rhodey could tell that he was deep in little space. It was adorable.
“James, if I may, Bruce is getting into the elevator to come give young Sir his check up now.”
Rhodey nodded, a smile on his face. This was going to be Tony’s first check up while still little, and he could only hope that it would go better than normal. “Thank you. Hear that, bug? Bruce is gonna come up and make you feel better.”
Tony frowned at him with a pout, but looked loath to be pulled away from his cartoon. He just stayed right where he was until the elevator doors opened up and Bruce came out.
“Hello Rhodey, Tony.”
Rhodey greeted him back, but Tony just made a few mumbling noises around his paci. He didn’t want to get back up, because whenever he did that, he got a tummy ache again.
Bruce smiled down at him though. “I like your footie pajamas, Tony.”
Tony was at least polite enough -in his little headspace- to pull out his paci and smile, “Thank you.”
Bruce sat down on the floor next to the little, and looked at the TV screen. “That looks fun, you watching cartoons today? Time to be lazy?”
Tony nodded, one foot nudging at Rhodey’s knee while he laid on the floor. Rhodey brought one hand down to close around Tony’s ankle. “Hey, bug, I think maybe you should sit up so Bruce can look at you.”
Tony popped his pacifier back out, scowl on his face. “He can see me just fine down here, Daddy.”
Rhodey grinned, “I know he can, but he needs to give you a check up.”
Tony scowled, but his rebuttal was cut off by Bruce. “You sure you want to stay there? Because if we can’t do the check up, you won’t get a surprise.”
Tony looked over at Bruce with wide eyes, “‘spises?”
Bruce nodded solemnly. “Yeah. No surprises for the baby if he can’t have his check up.”
Tony looked suspicious now, giving his paci a few thoughtful sucks while he went. Tony pulled his paci out and let out a pained moan, “Can’t get up, tummy hurts when I do that.”
Bruce nodded. “How about you lay in Daddy’s arms? I think I can do this if you’re reclined.”
Tony looked over at Rhodey with big scared eyes, and Rhodey smiled a little, getting down onto the floor next to him. “Come ‘ere, sugarbug, Daddy has his baby.”
Tony let out another whine, but let the other man manipulate his body into his lap, and went right back to giving Bruce equal parts suspicious and wide eyed looks. Bruce never bribed him when he was big.
He was never gonna get a check up while big again if Bruce was going to bribe him while little.
***
Tony was better, less than five days later. Thank god, because he may be more relaxed in his little headspace, but Rhodey didn’t think his parts could handle one more ‘whoops I stepped on Daddy’s junk while getting out of bed when I needed to puke at three in the morning’ wake up call.
Bruce was very amused by this.
“Tony’s all better now?”
Bruce nodded at Tony, who got a bright look on his face, and turned to Rhodey, who looked exactly like he felt; like he’d been taking care of a sick little for nearly a week now. “Daddy, Daddy, Dada, Tony’s all better now! I can has some ice cream, and cake, and soda, and lots of candy, and stay up really really late now, right?”
Bruce couldn’t hold back the stupid smile on his face. Tony as a little was downright charming .
“Tones, lil bug, Daddy doesn’t let you do that when you’re big.”
Tony pouted at him, “Clint does it though!”
Rhodey nodded, “And when he does, Phil yells at him.”
Tony sighed, nodding, “Yeah. My Daddy doesn’t yell, but times out corners isn’t so good.”
Rhodey nodded solemnly, giving Tony a kiss on the top of his wild curls. “I know. This lil boy just needs to listen to Dada, okay? Such a good boy for your daddy.”
Tony nodded, and almost immediately started squirming in Rhodey’s arms. “Yes Dada, but, but, but, can I go with Uncle Bruce to the lab now? I needs to see my baby bots! I haven’t played with Dummy in days.”
Rhodey looked a little surprised. Tony hadn’t even warmed up to Pepper and Happy that quick after they found out he was a little.
He smiled though, letting the squirmy boy go finally after pressing a few more kisses to his head. “Okay, bug, you go have fun.”
Tony cheered excitedly and got up off the couch, tugging on Bruce’s arm towards the door. “Yay! Dada says we can go play, come on , Imma show you my leggos, and Dummy knows how to play fetch, and it’s gonna be so much fun! ”
Bruce just followed behind him with a docile smile. This one might be a bit louder than the usual version, but Bruce liked him just as much.