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If he killed himself right here would it be worth it? It'd be easy enough, grab something sharp and stab himself. Hmmm no too drastic. Maybe he could just fly away? No… she'd start screaming and throw a tantrum and that wouldn't be helpful. Besides, if Candy got upset, then she'd make it literally everyone's problem; and considering they were supposed to be running errands inconspicuously, that would just mess everything up.
These were some of the many important thoughts going through Black Sapphire Cookie's mind as he sat on a rock in the middle of the forest. He was currently stuck listening to Candy Apple cookie rant about how great and amazing their Master Shadow Milk Cookie was, and how she should be the one he wants, not “that ugly, despicable, horrendous, ugly looking stupid vanilla cookie.”
“HEY! Are you even listening to me?!?” Candy Apple yelled right in Black Sapphire's face, causing him to tense and suppress a flinch. He quickly threw on a fake smile and gave a slightly passive aggressive nod.
“Of course I am Candy! I just got distracted for a second.” He replied smoothly, hoping Candy would just ignore it and either stop ranting and focus on the mission, or not get upset he wasn't paying attention.
“Ohh really?” Candy Apple replied “Then what did I just say? Huh?” She crossed her arms and gave him a smug, somewhat angry look. Black Sapphire internally groaned, of course she was pulling this shit.
“You were talking about how ugly and awful Pure Vanilla is.” He replied, trying not to show his annoyance with her immature behavior. Candy Apple looked at him intently with wide eyes, and leaned into his personal space with her creepy face. Black Sapphire ever so slightly cringed as he just barely leaned back. He really hated when she looked at him like that. Thankfully whatever she was looking for, she obviously found as she quickly straightened up and dropped the creepy face, instead having a wide smile. Black Sapphire let out the smallest sign of relief, and straightened up.
“Alright, it's been long enough.” Black Sapphire stated as he stood up, and dusted off the front and back of his suit. “We need to go get the materials Master Shadow Milk Cookie asked us to obtain. If we're lucky, we may have time to spread some deceit. Are you good to go?” Candy Apple nodded, before freezing in her place.
“Saph… there's…. something on your suit..” Candy Apple says looking and pointing at his left pant leg. Black Sapphire quickly looks down, having had one two many times where there was some creature, or rip, or stain he hadn't realized was there somehow magically appear when he thought he was finally ready to go out. However, he was confused. There was nothing there, at least nothing he could see. He still wasn't entirely sure Candy Apple didn't have some weird ability to see things differently than others, especially with her…. Infatuation with Master Shadow Milk Cookie. Maybe she could see certain colors better? Like bugs. It would make sense with how much she bugs him and Master. Black Sapphire looked up at Candy Apple.
“What? Candy what are you-” Before Black Sapphire could finish his sentence, Candy Apple quickly kicked him in the leg, causing him to trip backward and nearly fall onto the rock he was sitting on previously, only saving himself with his wings. “OW! What the fuck Candy Apple!” Black Sapphire exclaimed, as he snapped his head down; lowering himself onto the stupid rock he sat on moments before, making sure to not slip and embarrass himself even more. When he looked up to yell at Candy Apple, he realized she was already skipping away. She turned around at his shout and gave him a smug look.
“That was for ignoring me and doing an awful job lying to me about ignoring me!” She said with a grin before turning back around and skipping forward again, humming something Black Sapphire could barely make out. He thinks his eye might have twitched. As he resisted the urge to throw something at her, he thought back on his life decisions. Why did he ever think he wanted someone to talk with besides Master Shadow Milk? Why did he have to ask for something similar in the first place? He groaned before straightening his back and releasing his tightened fists, which he hadn't even realized he'd tightened in the first place. Unlike her he was mature, and not going to act like a child despite being an adult. He carefully got up, and gave Candy Apples quickly disappearing form a glare. He half walked half flew, to Candy Apple.
“Candy!” Black Sapphire said, somewhat aggressively, as he grabbed her arm.
“Hm?” Candy Apple hummed as she turned her head around, giving him the “look”. “Whatever is it dear Sapphire?” She questioned, saccharine sweet.
“You forgot to change. You know, your disguise?” Black Sapphire reminded her. “You are well aware that Master Shadow Milk would never allow us to go into town without disguises. Especially for the eh, reasons were going into town.” He slightly grimaced at the last part of his sentence. Candy Apple sighed and pouted, fully turning around to face him.
“Ughhh! Fine! I'll change! Beasts you're annoying…” Candy grumbled as she walked behind a tree a few paces away. “Give me like… 5 minutes or something. Stupid costume…. Stupid town…” Black Sapphire just turned around and decided to busy himself with his thoughts. He made a mental checklist of what they needed to purchase and how much it'd cost. A few moments later, Candy Apple was done. Black Sapphire turned around. She was in her usual “Apple Faerie” outfit, just without the wings. Black Sapphire nodded and used his own magic to turn himself into his own disguise. It was vaguely similar to the merchant disguise he once adorned. However, it added yellow flowers in his hair and his apron, his hair changed from being up in a bun to being down and shoulder length, and he had black leather boots with heels, similar to cow cookie boots. Once they were both ready, they headed into town.
—=+=—
“Seriously?! I was here five days ago and it was only 30 coins for one bottle, how is it 60 coins now?!” Black Sapphire Cookie -or rather “Oregon Blossom Cookie,” which was his current disguise- argued.
“Well sir, i'm sure you're well aware of the lack of grape products being transported here from the drought in the Hollyberry kingdom… so the wine is more expensive.” The merchant said calmly, if not a bit exasperated. Of course! Of course, just his luck. This beast-forsaken town was in a drought of grapes. Which meant their garbage berry juice was overpriced. Which also meant that he'd have to use some of his own money to buy the awful quality berry juice for his Master. Because of course his favorite type of berry juice is overpriced, shit quality berry juice. Black Sapphire tried not to break down in the middle of the market. Why did Truthless Recluse have to be lying about embracing deceit? Why must his life be so miserable? If Truthless Recluse was still here, Master Shadow Milk Cookie wouldn't be drinking at least 5 bottles of wine a day. They would actually have time and money to spread deceit and rebuild their shoddy lives. But no. Of course it couldn't be that simple. Black Sapphire sighed internally and decided when he got back to the spire he was locking himself in his room and sleeping. Fuck his stupid, miserable job.
“You- fine. Here's your coins.” Black Sapphire signed, not even trying to haggle. He did not have the mental strength today to argue, especially with how Candy Apple had been acting the past 3 days. As the merchant took his coins and packaged the wine bottles, Black Sapphire realized it was suspiciously quiet. Which of course, meant that Candy Apple was plotting. Black Sapphire grabbed the bag with the wine and turned around, holding the bag carefully. He walked into the crowd, and looked for Candy Apple in her “Apple Faerie” disguise. He was a flash of a large green apple going into a shop with suspiciously colored decor. Of course. His day couldn't get worse could it?
Black Sapphire walked towards the shop, stopping in his tracks when he saw the inside of it; or rather, who was inside it. None other than Candy Apple, in full disguise as Apple Faerie Cookie, covered head to toe in Shadow Milk Cookie merch. She had at least three bags full of Shadow Milk themed clothes, plushies- is that 2 body pillows-. How? How did she get any of it? Has she realized she's compromised that disguise? When did she get the merch? Who sold it? Where did they sell it? With what money did she buy it? He knows very well that she has significantly less “allowance” than him, and that she spends most of it immediately on buying frivolous things. He didn't know which question was most important. How was he going to explain this one? Beasts damm it.
Wait. He doesn't have to deal with this. Candy is an adult! If she messes up it's on her. Yeah. Yet, he couldn't turn away. It was definitely because he wanted to see people's reaction to this trainwreck. Definitely not because he cares about Candy. Definitely not. Black Sapphire sighed, he has to fix this, doesn't he?
Candy Apple, seemingly oblivious to his woeful questions, continued on through the store, obviously planning to buy something. She places what looks like.. comics? on the counter. When she pulls out a comically large pouch of coins, its clearly obvious how she paid for all the.. Shadow Milk Cookie merch. Yet, it still doesn't explain how she got the coins though. As she put the comics in the bag, Black Sapphire prepared himself mentally to deal with Candy Apple. He had to somehow pull Candy Apple over, and get them both out of the village, without compromising his disguise. He was, after all, a regular of this village. Or, rather, “Oregon Blossom Cookie” was. It’d be rather suspicious for him to hang around a cookie covered head to toe in Shadow Milk Cookie merch. He really, really did not get paid enough to deal with this.
Black Sapphire walked closer to the store, and stood by the window– pretending to look around to find someone. After a few minutes, Candy Apple finally left the store. As she did, Black Sapphire leaned sideways towards her, making sure she could see him.
“Hey. We have to go” He whispered to her, “You can't be caught walking around like that” As he whispered this, he carefully kept his eyes on his surroundings; hoping no one would see either of them or think they’re suspicious. He stole a glance at Candy Apple, who looked a bit upset but at least like she understood. He nodded and quickly looked away, and started walking towards an alley nearby. He was so incredibly thankful he heard the tell-tale click of Candy’s heels behind him.
Once he rounded the corner into the alley -and took another turn or two- until he was sure it was just them. When he was sure they were alone, he turned around and glared at Candy Apple.
“Just what do you think you're doing? Do you even know what you've just done?!” He exclaimed angrily, scowling. “This was possibly one of the worst things you could have done!”
“Ughh what do you mean! You're sooo overdramatic” Candy Apple groaned, rolling her eyes. Black Sapphire seriously considered choking her.
“Listen- just- you messed up.. ugh okay we need to leave now. I don't feel like explaining right now. I got the drinks Master Shadow Milk Cookie wanted. Let's just go back to the spire.” Black Sapphire said dejectedly.
“What. Why didn't we just portal here earlier! We walked for sooo long, this is bullshit!” Candy Apple whined as Black Sapphire began to get ready to make a portal.
“Well, you see, it takes energy to make portals. I get my energy mainly from rumors, and Master Shadow Milk Cookie. Since we haven't been spreading rumors or lies, due to… ahem… Master Shadow Milk Cookies' recent interest in berry juice; we haven't spread any rumors. Therefore, I have limited power. If we portaled here, its possible we may not have been able to portal back.” Black Sapphire explained, praying mentally that this would cause Candy Apple to be quiet and think while he made the portal. Thankfully, it worked. Finally, he finished the portal, grabbed Candy Apples wrist, and went through the portal -bringing Candy Apple with him through the portal.
—=+=—
They finally were at the spire. It took insufferably long, but at least they were here. Black Sapphire sighed, thank the beasts he could lay down soon. If he couldn't, he may actually kill someone, which obviously wouldn't be good.
“Move over!! Beasts your soo, soooo annoying!” Candy Apple whines, pushing Black Sapphire over and out of her way.
“What- Beasts Candy what the fuck!” Black Sapphire exclaimed, barely stopping himself from falling over. He really needed to work out didn't he… Wait, that wasn't important right now- he really needed to stop getting distracted.
“You're taking forever! Plus you have to give m- our lovely Master Shadow Milk Cookie his wonderful, amazing drinks he requested!” Candy Apple explained, her voice somehow getting even higher than normal as she talked about Master Shadow Milk Cookie. Beats this is awful… How can he get her out of his face so he can lay down? Wait, he just had a great idea.
“You know what? If you're in such a rush why don't you give Master Shadow Milk Cookie his drinks? I'm sure he would absolutely adore you for bringing them to him” Black Sapphire replied, trying to mimic Candy Apples voice when she was purposely showing she was pretending to be nice about something. Yet, for whatever reason, it seemed to actually… work on Candy Apple?? Her eyes lit up and she dropped everything she was holding.
“Great idea Sapphire! I'll be taking those! Bye!” Candy Apple replied enthusiastically, swiping the bags of berry juice out of his hand and scampering off towards Master Shadow Milk Cookies room. Well, that solved two problems! He grimaced as he looked down at the pile of fan merch, and edged around it, heading out of the entrance hall. He walked up a few stairs, through two hallways, and at least one painting, and finally made it to his room.
He quickly opened the door, shut it behind him, and immediately went to the bathroom. He quickly got rid of his disguise -using the same magic he used to put it on- and splashed water on his face. He dried his face using a hand towel, and left the bathroom. He put his staff leaning on his right nightstand, turned off the lights, and flopped down face first onto his bed. Thank Beasts he has a while to rest. He decided to ignore the loud shouts and sounds of fragile things like glass breaking coming from somewhere else in the Spire. It was not his job. Right now? He was off the metaphorical clock of his job. He finally let his eyes rest, and let himself fall into a semi-peaceful sleep.