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Shikamaru stood in the dark abandoned parking lot, it was the middle of June so it was nice enough to just wear shorts and a shirt out. Abandoned parking lots aren’t the most ideal hangout spot, especially not in the middle of the night, but it was his dealer's preferred meeting spot.
Shikamaru stood where a ramp led into what could have been a loading zone to the building that used to be in operation.
He frowned, looking around to see if he could find the familiar face. When he didn’t see anything he grabbed his phone out of his pocket, wincing at the bright light of his screen.
Deidara: i see u
He took another look around.
“Eugh creepy” he whispered to himself looking back at his phone
Hidan: I see u too
He rolled his eyes, and just put his phone away, soon enough he heard giggling in the distance, and it was coming towards him.
They’re here.
“Hey mannn” he heard a stupid voice call out to him, he turned on his phone flashlight and immediately the two people in front of him covered their faces.
“Okay fuck you too?” Deidara scowled
“Man ion even wanna sell to you now??” Hidan gave a bothered look
“Just give me my shit. Having a bad night.” He whispered the last part as he reached into his pocket pulling out a couple twenties.
He saw the smirks spread along hidan and Deidara's face as he handed them their money.
“Hey man, you’re having a bad night, 5 bucks off if you tell what’s up?” Deidara raised an eyebrow.
“Man you’re fucking nosey.” Hidan sneered at him.
“Okay whatever I wanna know?”
Whatever was going on, shikamaru wasn’t having it. “Hell no?”
“Is it about Neji Neji?” The blonde man teased.
Deidara and Neji were decent friends, they weren’t as close as they were before, but if it had to do with Neji he was intrigued.
“Who?”
“You remember! Younger than us, long brown hair, big eyes!” Deidara listed, hidan hummed as he tried to connect all the details. Shikamaru watched just waiting for deidara to pull out the pre rolls he wanted.
“OH! Ohhhhhh! Yeah the pretty boy!”
“Stick up his ass!”
“YES I REMEMBER!”
“Okay can I just have-“ shikamaru tried to interject, only to be met with deidaras finger pressed against his lip.
“Sh shhhhh shhh, my sweet underclassman. Let out all your troubles.” Deidra snaked around him and patted him on the back, shikamaru, annoyed, yanked his shoulder away from deidaras touch.
“Give me my shit dude…”
“Helllllllll no. Not till you say what’s up with my man Neji.”
Shikamaru sighed and pinched the bridge of his nose, remembering that shit, they’re friends.
“Fine. You can’t circle back to him with this shit okay? Now give me that.” Shikamaru snagged the bag Deidara was playing around with, pulling out one of the pre rolls and quickly lighting it up.
He sat on the edge of the loading zone, inhaling the smoke. He glanced over to hidan and deidara, he knew the exact look they were giving him.
“No. I’m not letting you get a hit. You’re the fucking dealer? Get your own?”
“Darn, I thought it’d work.” Hidan whispered not so discreetly to Deidara
“He’s right tho…” he said while he pulled out his own dab pen.
So once the thc took influence on the young souls' brains, deidara once again began to pry.
“So… Neji?” He smirked
“Neji, he hates me.” Shikamaru said putting his head on his knees.
“Damn hates him?” Hidan whispered
“Shut the fuck up ugly ass.” Deidara smacked hidan on the head
“Damn!” He scowled “you’re fucking ugly.”
“Shut your mouth.” He shoved his face away and turned back to shikamaru. “So… Neji?”
“He hates me. We fought and he left the apartment.” He mumbled
“Oh yeah, fight about what?” Deidara chuckled
“probably telling him that he wasn’t hot enough to be with him” hid and snarky comment went unnoticed by shikamaru
“I wanted to order something for dinner, but Neji said we should cook at home, and k forgot to do the dishes.” He smeared his hand along his face.
“Well if it makes you happy, we still love you.” Deidara gave him a one armed hugged.
“Uh get off me”
“No it’s okay to be vulnerable.” Hidan played along. “Come here” deidara and hidan gave half hugs to shikamaru, who was 5 seconds away from exploding, not emotionally, but physically, he was quite literally about to blow up.
The phone rang.
The three men’s eyes widened, looking at the dimmed light inside Shikamaru's pocket. Neji was calling. Deidara and hidan started to cackle.
“Oh shitttt”
“Hahhahs put him on speaker.” Shikamaru sighed and complied, putting Neji on speaker.
“Hey shikamaru? I’m back home. Where are you? I’m sorry that I got upset. It was an overreaction.” He said on the other line.
“Facetime him” deidara whispered to shikamaru, and once again he complied.
After pressing the camera icon, the three huddled around the screen waiting for it to load.
“What’s this about shikamaru?” Neji asked.
“Hollyyyyyyyyy fucking shit.” Deidaras mouth agape
“Dude.” Hidan looked at the screen, then back at shikamru, he pat him on the back “nice.”
“Hey baby, I’m outside.” He simply said
“Hi Neji I’m here too.” Deidara popped his head in
“Me too” hidan followed suite. “You’re really hot shikamaru is a lucky guy.”
“You’ve met me we went to highschool together hidan” Neji sighed “your eyes are so red” he grimaced
“You’re so beautiful” shikamaru gave him a dumb grin “I miss you”
“Dude you’re so gross” deidara judged
“Then come home.” Neji hung up on him and shikamaru sat up from his spot on the loading zone edge.
Deidara place his hands on shikamarus shoulders and looked him straight in the eyes “you better make that beautiful-“
“STUNNING.” hidan chimed in
”STUNNING man, very very happy.” He finished
“Whatever man, god why am I hanging out with you bums…” shikamaru scratched his neck and mumbled under his breath.
“Bums. BUMS?” Hidan repeated
“Hey hidan, I think he just called us bums?”
“Yeah dei, I wonder who he thinks he is?”
“Okay okay, sorry…” Shikamru put his phone back into his pocket after reading a text Neji had just sent him. He smirked.
“What did he say.” Deidara wondered
“nothing, not telling your junkie ass.” He said as he walked away, towards the sidewalk.
“He’s totally getting laid.” Hidan smiled at deidara.
“Yeah, or lured back into the house thinking he is going to get laid, THEN instead Neji beats the shit out of him.” The blonde crossed his arms feeling the rough skin on the back of them.
“I know how neji-neji gets.” He smirked while watching shikamaru walk off.
