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"No one has the right to take away youth from young people"
The person who said that had crushed Okkotsu Yuta's youth with his own hands.
...
It was winter, the tiny snowflakes did not hesitate to fall on the jet-black hair. The person standing in the snow was wearing an old traditional costume, the haori outside was so large that it hid his fragile but extremely strong appearance. The large scarf was wrapped around more times because it was too long, covering his red cheeks.
No matter how you look at it, the outfit is still too big for the teenager who just turned 18.
18 years old, is the age when children are entering the threshold of ‘adulthood’, is the place where freshness still resides, is the age when adults should protect and comfort them. But these things are completely not true for the acting head of the Gojo clan.
'Warm..'
Sometimes wearing clothes like a bento wrap is not a bad thing, especially on days with weather like this.
'No one has the right to take away the youth of young people'
'Lie…'
Is youth the burden of an important clan? Is youth the pressure of heavy political discussions filled with rivalry? Is youth… seeing your teacher step into death with your own eyes and being unable to do anything?
Youth is…
'Sophisticated'
All are just endless excuses. Youth is simply where sensei still exists.
If sensei were still here, the kid wouldn’t have become the acting head of the Gojo clan. If sensei were still here, he wouldn’t have had to dip his hands in the stinking mud of those bad adults. If sensei were still here, Yuta wouldn’t have had to bear the title of ‘monster’ all by himself.
'Because you are not here'
...
If two years ago, someone had asked, ‘Do you like that Gojo guy?’, the first-year boy would have tilted his head in confusion for a while, then nodded vigorously.
‘Eh, of course I like him’
He was the only person who accepted him, the only person who ‘could’ get close to him without being overwhelmed by Rika, the only person who told him ‘you did well’. How could Yuta not like him.
If a year ago, someone had asked him, 'Do you like that annoying blindfolded guy?', the second-year boy would have chuckled lightly, the corners of his eyes would have curved up, and his voice would not have been able to hide the taste of happiness.
‘Well, that's our sensei, of course I like him..’
For some reason, his words were a bit uncertain, not because Yuta didn't like Gojo anymore but rather… the word 'like' had gradually fallen into an unclear orbit.
If someone were to ask, ‘Does senpai still like Gojo-sensei now?’, the neutral face would just droop, the pupils would no longer have any blue light but would still be filled with gentleness for some reason.
‘That person is unlikable…’
The junior who now had only half of her vision looked at the expression on the soft face of her senior who she had never been familiar with. It wasn't exactly sadness, nor was it completely longing, more like bitterness. If Nobara had the chance to observe their relationship directly, she would have a deeper insight, but…
‘Couldn't be more right, huh?’
Now she could only shrug and agree with her senior. It was truly unbearable to like that person, making decisions on his own, rushing in on his own, then leaving on his own, not giving others even a single gap to interfere, truly unbearable.
...
‘Always…’
Snow still falls, leaves still change, the clock hands keep turning, only that proud figure disappears from this world.
'I still don't understand'
The past, the future, and destiny are things that humans cannot change, but Yuta still can't help but feel bitter. Two years is too short for him to repay all these beautiful days of youth to his teacher. Too short to reach the vast blue sky, too short for him to rummage through the forest that hides all of that person's thoughts.
The earth will continue to rotate, we can do nothing for the dead, everyone knows that it is just an excuse for the remaining people to continue walking. It is just a wordless lie used to cover up the last wish that was cruelly crushed.
‘I hate you…I hate you…I hate you’
Through the thick layer of cloth, the coldness of the white snow still imprinted on the teenager's knees, the small figure now looked even smaller, Yuta's neck shrank, his face buried in the old high-quality black scarf as if he wanted to disappear from this world.
‘Luckily..it's still here’
‘Kenkai’ - is a technique that preserves the integrity of an object at a certain point in time, including its scent. Every piece of cloth, every object, every wall, every mat, there is no place that does not have traces of this technique, causing bad gossip to be spread, but once one steps into this position, those words are not even worth worrying about.
-'Wow, you've come this far and you say you hate me huh, Yuta is such a bad liar'-
“Shut up!”
Yuta felt like he was going crazy? He could almost hear his sensei's voice ringing in his head, still as stupid, as sarcastic.
-'Oh, it's true that Yuta is scary when he gets angry'-
Yuta is the type of good kid who always uses honorifics everywhere, but sometimes he can't help but let out a few harsh words, even swearing.
-'As harsh as it is, you always want to hear my voice, right?'-
Yes, so true that Yuta just wanted to scream at him. He wanted to hear that voice so badly, even if it was just an illusion. Even if tomorrow morning, when they woke up, was the day they were just planning to fight against Sukuna, Yuta would not regret it, that selfish wish had always burned every day, every hour.
‘It's okay, I'm the strongest.’
‘Liar, idiot! If you are the strongest, why did you lose!’
-’...’-
The dry throat hiccupped, almost drowned out by countless complaints. Pain… no matter how many times it happened, the invisible frustration still clenched tightly into the heart that was always wrapped in bandages every day.
‘You are no different from him! Why did you hesitate at that moment?’
-’...’-
Even if we dig through this snow, those questions will never be answered.
“..You are a show-off idiot”
-'Haha, that's the most correct scolding you've given me today'-
The teenager's shoulders slumped, his reproaches gradually weakening, now he looked like nothing more than a snowball.
Just like that, day after day, month after month, that young man would let his frustrations flow out like a flood, only to put on a calm facade to face the world that 'that person' had used his life to change. Sensei, do you know? The day you left was also the day my youth faded away.
-'See you again, Yuta'-