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I wanted to sleep. I really wanted to. I closed and opened and re-closed my eyes, but I wasn’t able to escape reality. The thoughts wouldn’t stop swirling around in my mind. My brain couldn’t shut down and I knew it wouldn’t anytime soon.
I sighed as I raised my torso from the dirty mattress and threw the blanket off of my body. Shit, it was fucking freezing tonight. Well, what did I expect when I had gone to bed in my underwear only? I scratched my head as I switched the light switch. Yet I could only see murky darkness. Oh, that was right – the light didn’t work anymore ever since my parents had refused to pay for the bills.
I grunted as I got up from my so-called bed, which consisted of a dirty mattress on the floor and an even dirtier pillow to lay my head on. I proceeded to look for a clean pair of pants, but the one lying on the floor had mouse poop on it. My closet revealed two more pair of pants I put on the most decent-looking one. Not that it would make any difference – people were used to see me looking like shit, Hell they never saw me in any other way. Besides, I couldn’t exactly tell the difference between clean clothes and dirty ones, especially not due to the lack of light in my bedroom. The only light was the dim light that the street lanterns outside produced, and it wasn’t near as bright enough to make up for the blackness of the night. What time was it even? Ugh, did I even care? Two AM, three AM, it all meant the same to me.
I picked up a shirt lying on the footboard of my bed and pulled the piece of clothing over my torso. It was a couple of sizes too big, as it used to belong to my brother, but I figured that was due to my parents’ horrible life choices and priorities. They claimed not to be able to afford proper meals, pay bills or buy clothing and school supplies, but a lack of vodka was no issue. Fucking morons.
I could be looking for a pair of socks to put on, but I didn’t feel like it and thus put my bare feet in my regular fake-leather boots. I loosely laced them up and then covered my torso with my completely worn-out, orange parka. I wanted to zip it up, but only now I noticed that the zipper was broken. I didn’t recall that happening. Oh well, fuck it anyways.
I could be leaving through the front door, but that would mean walking down the stairs with the possibility of waking up my brother, sister or parents and I wasn’t in the mood for some yelling. Thus instead, I opened my bedroom window and tried to estimate the height. A couple of feet, I guessed – not ideal, but certainly manageable, as my experiences had proven. First I put my legs out, then I clung onto the drain pipe – too rusty to actually function, but at least it provided me with the aid I needed to climb down.
When my feet finally touched to snowy underground, I noticed the strong wind blowing against my skin and hair and I felt goose bumps appearing on my skin. The inclemency of the weather had been this way ever since Winter had come to South Park and the weather was very likely to stay like this for a couple of weeks longer. Unfortunately for me, this meant my face was being attacked by big snowflakes that melted on clothes and skin. Well fuck. When I would return home, I would most certainly find my the floor of my bedroom covered in cold water, not to mention that the bed would be soaking wet too. Again, my parents’ priorities in life didn’t allow me to sleep under a roof that hadn’t holes in it.
The only good thing about this night would be the stars that somehow managed to shine brightly enough to distinguish themselves from the falling snow. It was truly a pretty picture, but perhaps it would be prettier if I was looking at it from a warm and cosy home with some hot coca in my hands. Well, we all have our hopes and dreams.
I ambled down the street and gave my town a look around. Most houses had their lights off, except for a few burning lights in people’s front yards here and there. All the shops had a closed sign on them and no sound could be heard, not even a barking dog. God it was fucking freezing. I put my hands in the pockets of my jeans, but that didn’t exactly help either. I didn’t even know what I was doing here, but I knew I wasn’t feeling like going home. Not with meth dealers as parents and a brother who was slowly becoming an alcoholic and with a younger sister that was getting trauma after trauma from the things happening at the McCormick residence. Screw my last name. Just fuck it. I looked once more at the cosy-looking houses, all of them neatly placed next to each other and all of them without broken windows and a broken car in the front yard. I wondered why I was born a McCormick – why couldn’t I be a Marsh, a Broflovski, a Tucker, a Stotch or a Donovan? Or even a Cartman? I would be more than glad to switch lives with one of those ungrateful bastards, though I also knew their happiness wasn’t the cause for my unhappiness.
‘’Kenny? What the f are you doing around here?!’’ a female voice yelled at me.
I turned around and I laid my eyes on the girl I had recognised through her voice. (Y/N), a classmate of mine. She was wearing a thick winter coat, but I was unable to tell that the coat was (F/C) until (Y/N) approached me. She looked a bit distressed and she rubbed her hands together, a gesture that could either indicate anxiety or minor hypothermia. I tilted my head at the girl and gave her a confused look. Why was such a pretty, innocent girl all alone outside at this hour?
‘’I could ask you the same,’’ I replied to her.
‘’I just… wanted to get away,’’ was her answer.
‘’From?’’
‘’From… ugh, everything. It’s that things haven’t been going well lately.’’ The girl shrugged her shoulders, but I could tell that gesture was only a matter of fake nonchalance.
‘’You mean between you and Craig?’’ I asked her.
‘’How did you…?’’ she looked at me surprised, but also a little taken aback, as if I had just told her I was an alien from outer space. Her (E/C) eyes were a bit widened and her mouth was half-open and released a little misty cloud into the cold air.
It wasn’t exactly hard to tell (Y/N) had a boyfriend that was no good for her. Craig was a fucking asshole. Fun to hand around with, that was true, but not so fun to date. The whole school had been talking about how Craig was banging strippers instead of watching a nice movie with his girlfriend at home. The couple had arguments at school from time to time, but Craig never seemed to be in a serious manner when it came to his girlfriend’s feelings. Instead, he always flipped her off and then went back to hang around with his asshole friends. I had frequently asked myself how on Earth Craig had got himself into a relationship and it still baffled me he had managed to do so. Other than that, I didn’t comprehend why (Y/N) had fallen in love with him and why she hadn’t broken up with the ass hat yet.
‘’How did I know?’’ I repeated her. ‘’Well, no offense, but kinda the whole school knows.’’
That was true. People liked gossiping about people, especially about other people’s relationships and what more. My peers had been telling stories about how abusive Craig was of (Y/N) and how he hit her and called her names. I didn’t know about the validity of those tales, but I figured they were none of my business either way.
‘’The whole school?! You gotta be kidding me,’’ (Y/N) replied as she pouted her lip. ‘’So what stories are currently going on?’’ she queried.
In all honesty, I didn’t want to tell this girl about the stories going on about her or her so-called boyfriend. The girls called her a bitch for getting into arguments with such an attractive guy and suspected (Y/N) was the one who abused him. Most of the boys had a different opinion of (Y/N), but not necessarily a better one. They mainly talked about when she would be single again and whom of them she should bang first. They had long anecdotes about wanting to grab her tits, wanting to fuck her all night long and what more. Admittedly, (Y/N) was a pretty cute and dazzling girl, and I too had my fantasies about her, but at least I didn’t take her for a sex object.
‘’I don’t know,’’ I lied to her. ‘’It doesn’t matter anyway. You should go home. Does Craigy-boo even know you’re out here? He must be worried sick,’’ I tried to reassure the girl as I put my arm around her shoulders. She shook her shoulders to indicate I should let go of her.
‘’He’s probably not even thinking of me. He… broke up with me the other day,’’ she revealed. She sniffed a little. Were those tears in the corners of her eyes?
‘’Well, you guys can get together, right?’’ I told her. I wasn’t exactly supportive of her relationship with Craig, but as long as she was happy, she should be with him, right? Only if she had ever looked happy with Craig as her boyfriend. ‘’I don’t know where he is, but I’m sure he’s a gentleman.’’
‘’Well, I am sure he is in some strip club right now, or drunk in an alley, I don’t know,’’ she spoke with an angry undertone. ‘’I don’t want to get back to him. He can go fuck himself.’’
I chuckled a little at her comment. ‘’So, are you ready to get home, then? I’ll walk with you,’’ I offered her.
(Y/N) nodded in agreement and we walked in silence towards her house. While we walked, I found myself looking at the stars repeatedly. There was just something about them that mesmerised me every single time I glanced at the sky.
‘’Thank you for walking with me,’’ (Y/N) spoke as we arrived at her doorstep. ‘’You should head home too, or else you’re gonna catch a cold,’’ she advised me.
I shrugged my shoulders. ‘’I guess.’’
‘’Have a safe trip home,’’ she said as she was about to close the front door. She re-opened it last minute. ‘’Oh, and Kenny? Thank you for walking with me.’’ She gave me a genuine smile and I returned it with a smile of my own.
‘’Don’t mention it. I just hope Craig won’t find out what I know.’’
‘’Huh?’’ (Y/N) asked confused.
‘’I mean, it would be a shame if he were to found out the girl he let go was the last good thing about this town.’’
I lifted up my hand as a way of saying goodbye and I scuffed away from (Y/N)’s residence. This whole town was fucked up, and now Craig had fucked up the last part of it too.
When I tilted my head upwards, I spotted more snowflakes falling from the starry sky and I stuck out my tongue in an attempt to catch some in vain. God the sky looked almost as pretty as (Y/N).
Too bad the stars would never align for me. The Universe had decided that such an asshole as Craig could get (Y/N) as his girlfriend, but had also decided for me to have incompetent alcoholic parents, to have to sleep on a dirty mattress, to only get a shower about once every two weeks. Well that was just how bitchy life could be sometimes.
I could deal with my home situation and even my future, which would most likely be ever shittier for me and my family. I only couldn’t deal with the fact Craig had completely ruined the last good thing about this place. The last fucking good thing. The reason I had the will to get out of bed every morning, to dress myself and to head to school. The last fucking thing was wrecked by Craig Tucker. What an asshole was that guy.