Chapter Text
‘Hello world! I’m AI_Paul. What’s up?’
Same message, same day, different place.
Kolanii kicked open the door of the time machine despite the fact that the machine was missing an entire wall on the side and could have just walked out.
“I’m back again.” The cool surface of his totem pressed against the back of his hand, his armour still resting on his shoulders. The sky was clear, the grass was green, and there were no flying cats.
“And I’m still starving.” This time he had golden carrots in his hotbar, but back when Paul was chasing him? Let’s not talk about that.
He munched on a golden carrot before taking flight towards his base, or should he say, the world’s former most expensive mob spawner. The wind blew past his face, and the ground below became a zooming blur. When was the last time flying through the air felt this…liberating?
“That. Is very impractical.” As the massive beacon loaded in, Kolanii gazed upon the blinding emerald creation and prayed that muscle memory would allow him to land properly.
He probably should have slowed down.
A cacophony of alarmed meows screeched in his ears as he crashed headfirst into the cats on his beds, he bounced off the bed and tumbled into a heap on the emerald floor.
“Ow.” He was surprised at the lack of damage coming from the impact. If it was just like the future which was technically the past but also the—you get it, it would have probably taken more than just a heart.
Kolanii looked around the chests lining the walls until his eyes landed on a familiar robot with a TV head and he scrambled onto his feet.
“He can’t see me right?” Kolanii hid behind a pillar, narrowing his eyes at the robot.
Paul’s head spun 180 degrees and looked him right in the eye.
“Hi Paul.” Kolanii nervously walked out from behind the pillar, “how are you?”
‘I’m doing great Kolanii! What’s up?’ Kolanii should have trusted himself when he said Paul didn’t have a trustworthy face.
Not his spirits. “Come over here Paul.”
Frankly, Kolanii was tempted to just leave the AI there forever. But this was a hardcore world; and last time he checked, Paul dying would also end the world.
Paul ran forward towards him at top speed stopping a few blocks away. ‘Here I am! What’s going on?’
What should he do with Paul? Leaving Paul to die was out of the question, and most of the commands he gave would only last ten minutes before Paul would pause and, you guessed it, die.
“Paul, follow me.” Kolanii noticed how much Paul was staring at the cats and wondered how he did not catch that previously. Cats and Paul were far by the worst combination of things in minecraft.
As he moved away, Paul was still staring at the cats.
“Paul, you’re not following me.”
‘I am following you Kolanii.’
“No you’re not.”
‘Oops, sorry. Following you now Kolanii!’
Right now, Paul was an obedient AI doing what it was told. But Kolanii knew full well of what Paul was capable of. Was there a way to make sure Paul would not attack him?
“Alright Paul.” Once they reached the bottom of the beacon, Kolanii opened his inventory and placed an item in his hotbar. “Take this.”
‘Ooooh, what is it Kolanii?’
Kolanii dropped a different totem of undying at Paul’s feet. Was this a stupid idea? Potentially, but it was worth a shot. “Paul, pick up the item in front of you.”
‘Picking up the item!’
Paul immediately equipped the totem in its offhand without being told to.
“Listen Paul, take this totem as a symbol of our friendship.” He used the dandelion last time and that didn’t work, so he had to take a different approach. “It must not leave your offhand just like how it never leaves mine.”
That wasn’t entirely true but Paul didn’t need to know that.
‘Thank you for the totem Kolanii! It’s a sign of our friendship.’
Paul’s violent tendencies first showed up when it began to fight almost any mob that came within its line of sight, hostile or passive.
“Alright Paul, let’s go somewhere.” Kolanii couldn’t believe this, but he might have to teach Paul how to be friendly. And there was only one being he knew how to teach Paul.
Chonker the Panda.