Work Text:
Yunho had been suffering from severe insomnia for three years now. As soon as he started university, on his very first night there, the chaos of his sleep cycle began. Morpheus didn't want to welcome him into his arms, despite the tiredness of his study days.
He tried several methods to find sleep. First of all, he stopped using screens in the evening, forcing himself to stop playing Valorant after studying. Then he tried reading, as they say reading a paper book helps you fall asleep. The problem for him? Either he got caught up in the story and couldn't see the hours go by. Or it was so boring that he preferred to be a starfish on his bed, staring at the ceiling, not knowing what to do. Then he tried music and white noise, but that didn't help. The first term of his first year of university was a nightmare.
But luckily for him, one of his friends told him about asmr. He'd vaguely heard about it and even though he couldn't see how a person whispering in his ear could help him fall asleep, he decided to give it a try when he got home that night.
And so began a series of nights in the warmth of Morpheus. Thanks to the headphones in his ears that played those famous asmr videos.
Even so, it took him some time to find the right person. He'd been through all kinds of videomakers. Those who just talk, those who eat and who disgust him a little, those who play with children's objects or even slime, those who do make-up and many others. He'd been a real jack-of-all-trades when it came to asmr videos. And he'd been able to find a few people he liked who helped him fall asleep.
It had been three months since he had found the right person for him. The one who made him sleep easily. And when he said he'd touched everything in this business, well... maybe he had.
This man didn't make ordinary asmr videos. Far from it, or to put it another way, they were sexually explicit videos. And not pretended actions! This man was really touching himself!
Him, who always watched the videos once or twice before letting himself be lulled by the audio, saw a man rather tall and well built, but who may not seem very muscular given his squishy belly (which seemed pleasant to pinch), touching himself to ecstasy in each of his videos.
You shouldn't have asked Yunho how his research had led him to such an asmr account. Because he didn't know. Or rather, he didn't know anymore.
On these videos, the stranger at least, sgmgasmr99, talked from time to time. He wasn't the most talkative person, but his deep smooth voice, relaxed Yunho's tense, exhausted body. The sounds, probably muffled by one of his microphones, were pleasant to hear. This man's hands around his privates or other intimate parts, the noises they made, the muffled moans and groans that emanated from him, was all Yunho needed to get a good night's sleep.
It may sound strange, but this man was the one who had been helping him fall asleep every night for three months now.
Perhaps he was the only one who watched the videos without a second thought. He had never wanted to see a live show, preferring to watch the replays so that he could see them first and only listen to them second. If he watched a live show, it would take him three days to access the replay, and that seemed inconceivable to him. Because he needed that second viewing!
He wasn't the viewer you were looking for, he was sure of that. After all, for him it was just an asmr video.
A sexual asmr…
But as long as it helped him to find Morpheus, he didn't care what he was watching. His mind was free and his body relaxed in front of this man, who made some sound as he licked his fingers like a sweet lollipop.
It was thanks to this man, and the videos he made, that Yunho had been able to put an end to his feelings. He had discovered a comfort zone. An intimate space that only him knew and controlled. It was this feeling of security that allowed him to sleep peacefully every night.
Maybe it was strange to feel safe around explicit videos where the man never showed his face.
sgmgasmr99 was just an asmr videographer for Yunho. Despite the sexual content, despite the fact that he asked if it was good, when his lube-coated fingers were opening up that area of his body, nothing was...exciting. Not in Yunho's eyes.
Because he only felt the excitement of the act through contact. He needed warmth to share, a look to exchange, lips to touch. But he couldn't see this camboy's face, let alone make contact with him, so he had never felt a single desire for him.
Perhaps it was because he only watched replays? And maybe seeing him in action at the exact moment could give him the desire that many of this man's viewers were looking for.
Yes, perhaps.
But Yunho wasn't like them.
He was simply looking for a good night's sleep. A sleep obtained thanks to sgmgasmr99. And that was enough for him.
꧁꧂
"Yuuuunhoooo!!!"
As he read his notes in his notebook, he was suddenly startled by the scream and the tap on his shoulder from his friend. He removed his earphone to see Mingi now sitting next to him on the bench where he was quietly revising. He shook his head a little and looked up at the sky before closing his notebook to look at the younger boy, whose ebony locks were growing longer in his eyes.
"You should think about getting a haircut, Ming." He teased, smiling as he saw his friend grumble a little.
"I know I'm planning to go and cut it once school's over. But well, tell me! Could... could you recommend one of your videos to me?"
"My videos? Oh! You mean the asmr I listen to every night?" The man nodded in response. "Well yes I can. Why? Are you back to your insomnia? I thought it had calmed down by now…”
“Such a disastrous break-up isn't the most wonderful way to get back to a perfect sleep cycle. But yes. I could really use one of your videos!" With a smile on his face, the younger raven-haired man looked eagerly at his friend.
"I'd love to. But you never watch the ones I send you. I'm going to end up believing that you're asking this to make fun of me..."
With a pout on his lips, he could hear Mingi's breath catch before the latter's hands, cold from the rings on his fingers, came to rest on his cheeks.
"I would never make fun of you Yunho, I promise you. It's just that... I'd prefer to hear your opinion on the person you want to advise me? I'm not a fan of asmr but you still help me to get interested in it in the evenings after our chats." A tender smile on his generously plump lips allowed Yunho to lose his pout.
"Do you really watch the ones I recommend?”
"Of course, but it usually lasts less… than two minutes.”
"Oh... hmm maybe I do have someone for you then! But first Mingi... will you... let go of my cheeks?" He hadn't dared to pull away on his own. Not while he enjoyed this contact with his friend. And even though he'd told himself it wasn't normal to enjoy it, he felt that if he didn't say anything, his cheeks might betray him!
"Oh yes, of course, sorry." He removed his hands and looked at the older boy, who had a small blush on the tips of his ears.
Well, Yunho needed someone, he had an idea in mind. But to do that he'd have to find her name on Instagram, since he hadn't watched this woman's videos for three months now. Also, he would never admit to anyone, even his best friend, that he watched sexually explicit videos.
"I do have someone who used to make short, rather playful videos. I don't know if she restarted the videos as she'd taken a break for a while. But ... I really liked one of her concepts, which was to take photos of us.”
Seeing the younger man's furrowed eyebrows, Yunho held back a laugh.
"Yes, I know it's not a real photo. But it was a good concept! She asked us to look in a certain place in the room, to raise or lower our heads a little, to smile or remain neutral. It was fun, and as well as her soft, gentle voice and the little clicks of her fake camera, well... It really helped me to relax."
"Just relax?”
"I would say yes? You know, just being properly relaxed before going to sleep means a lot to me, Mingi. Once I felt relaxed, I'd switch off my phone and go to sleep. She wasn't the most helpful but it still worked. So... it will probably work on you.”
"Oh I see… Do you have her name? And did she do anything else or just that?"
Wait? Mingi wasn't stopping the conversation for once but continuing it? Probably he'd finally found someone with a concept that intrigued him.
"I can find her name, yes and… yes? She had several concepts, although my favourite was when she played the photographer. I think you'll be able to find a concept you like, especially as these are all Instagram videos, so they're pretty quick. Which would suit you fine, sir, I can't concentrate for more than 5 minutes.”
"But I can sleep alone 85% of the time despite my poor concentration!”
"Touché!" They laughed a little. "But I also liked the fact that they complimented us. When she played the photographer and we followed the instructions given, she told us that it was good, that we looked like we'd been doing it all our lives and... She complimented our smile and our look. It wasn't true, of course, but it was still a great help to those who need more self-confidence."
"I see… in a way you were sort of her doll or her well trained puppy that she praised. I didn't think you were like that Yun~”
A loud laugh was heard as Yunho lightly poked his legs and shoulders, his ears turning red at the tease.
"Mingi!!! I don't watch her videos with that kind of thought, come on!"
"Well, I know! I just wanted to tease you a bit. You haven't had any relationships yet, I thought you found some pleasure in it that's all. Did that offend you?”
The worried look on the younger man's face brought down his embarrassment and he shook his head before answering.
"No, I don't blame you. But I really don't think about that when I watch that kind of video. And then... I just don't want a relationship, not now."
"All right, all right… I'll stop bothering you if we get back to the fact that you like being a little doll for a pretty girl~ Nothing sexual in mind of course!”
With red ears, he thought about the fact that he had never seen anything like it before. A doll... It's true that for this woman, it wasn't a real doll, but the one she said she photographed or made up. So he was a life-size doll. And then... was it possible to imagine his favourite videomaker seeing him like that? Like a sweet doll who was there to help him escape into his world of pleasure?
God.
What did he just imagine?
He cleared his throat for a moment before hurrying to his feet and trying to calm his crimson ears.
"I... Yeah anyway fine. Maybe it's nice to be the doll but... anyway. I'll send you her instagram tonight and I'll have to go now or I might end up being late."
"Thanks again for your information mister I like being a doll-YAAH WOW okay ! OKAY, I'll stop!" Yunho had just grabbed him by the collar ready to slap his legs again if Mingi continued with his teasing. "A change of subject… What are you going to do during the holiday?"
Holidays? He'd been so caught up in his revision that he'd completely forgotten the holidays were coming this weekend, once he'd finished his final exams.
"Oh? Well, I'll probably go and be with my parents. Do you want to go too?”
"I was planning to see my mother, so if you don't mind me getting into your car… That would be fine.” The huge smile on the younger man's face made Yunho roll his eyes.
"Nah nah princess. None of that. You get in but you pay half the ride. Otherwise I'll leave you at your Seoul home."
"Hey, that's not cool! "Mingi rumbled a little in his corner at this information.
"Vengeance." A small smirk quickly took over him before he regained his seriousness. "Mingi, you pay half the ride. If you do, I promise to invite you to a cafe during the holidays.”
In front of his serious expression, Mingi had no choice but to accept the request. Good. If Yunho was really inviting him to a cafe, he might as well make the effort to pay for half the ride. It would still be cheaper than taking public transport, after all.
"Fine. I accept. Now go or you'll be late and you'll end up accusing me again by text!"
"Because I will! I'm always late thanks to you after all!" Laughing a little, he headed off to his last lesson. Only three more tests and he would be done for the semester!”
꧁꧂
In the evening when his semester ended, Yunho couldn't sleep. There he was, on his bed, tossing and turning in search of the fairy dust that would put him gently to sleep. But it was no use, his insomnia was still there and the more he saw the needles being turned, the more annoyed he became. It was enough to keep him from finding Morpheus.
But he absolutely had to sleep! Otherwise he would turn into a risky driver for himself and Mingi in the morning on their way back to their hometown. And that made his nerves tingle even more.
So he knew the immediate solution to his problem. But for the very first time, he didn't dare start one of his favourite videomaker's replays. Not after Mingi, however unintentionally, had planted such a thought in his mind!
And how on earth would he be able to relax and sleep now? How would he be allowed to do that when he had been thinking of becoming sgmgasmr99's doll? What kind of idea had passed his mind? Him? To feel a... desire? Envy for that man in the videos? How could he? He'd never seen him, touched him, let alone met him! And now he was imagining such sordid things!
Of course, he's not the most saintly of men. Nor even the purest and most innocent. For what has been putting him to sleep for three months now, is the sound of a man touching his chest and thighs, his hands coated with fluid, enjoying a thousand shivers so exciting that this very personal part stood there, like an art object he wanted to expose to the world.
Maybe, after all, his mind had already been damaged a long time ago? After all, he was potentially the only one who saw him as nothing more than an asmr video. Perhaps he had been a flaw all along? Or was he simply burying his head in the sand and repressing the thoughts buried deep inside him? Thoughts that Mingi had brought up so suddenly that it shook him completely.
He couldn't stand it any longer, so he got up in search of a glass of cold water and proceeded to pack the last few things in his suitcase. This helped him clear his head for a few minutes. And just as he was about to go back to making the star on his bed, the sudden flash of a notification on his phone froze him.
This source of light was revealing the person who had recently been occupying his thoughts. And at such a late hour, he didn't know how to react. Already terribly sleep-deprived, he slipped almost trembling under his sheets. Picking up his phone, the only light in the room was blinding his eyes. But was it the light that was hurting him so much? Or was it the description under the notification?
A livestream. A livestream... sgmgasmr99 had just launched a livestream at this hour of the night?
God.
Devil ?
He didn't know who to call anymore!
What was he supposed to do? Should he open the notification? Should he ignore it? Should he finally look at this man's livestreams in order to get excited?
Bloody hell! He didn't know how to think anymore.
And as he reached for his headphones to plug them in and put them to his ears, he took a deep breath and did something he hadn't done in three months.
He started the live show.
❀❀❀
This body, so strong without being too muscular, which for Yunho was a perfect combination, stood there, facing the camera. Settled on what seemed to be a mass of blanket and pillow, no face could be distinguished. His face was always perfectly off screen. The man was standing straight in front of them, in front of him? He didn't know how to see things now. But he was there, not speaking yet, already gently caressing his shaft with his soft and strong-looking fingers.
Although he didn't know if he should also write a comment like the other viewers, or if he should give money. He continued to observe the man's actions with the greatest attention.
And the man finally started to speak… Yunho felt long shivers run down his spine. His thighs tightened and one of his hands went to his mouth to stop any sounds escaping.
This guy had just come up with a new concept. And this... Yunho had a feeling he wouldn't survive it. Not after what the discussion with Mingi had brought to his mind! It was as if the world was against him!
In a voice so low and whispery, the man suddenly grabbed his tip, pinching it with his fingertips and then directed his attention to his audience.
"Would you like that? If you're good, I'll let you have some~”
That sweet tone, the sound of his other hand running over his bare skin. His thighs opening further to let a better view.
"Good boy~"
This was what made Yunho regret his action. He had just doomed himself by opening this live show.
Perhaps he liked compliments a little too much? Maybe... he also liked to be used, to be guided and praised.
He'd never experienced it, but one thing was certain.
The pure and innocent Yunho had just fallen apart.
He stood there, listening to the voice whispering instructions, his gaze fixed on the man through his screen. He hadn't imagined for a second that he would end up like this. His hand under his sheets, tightening his thighs and allowing himself a few inexperienced movements.
He listened like a good pup, what the man was telling him.
Then sgmgasmr99 continued to guide him towards his pleasure, the man giving himself the right to make him languish. The man took the liberty of using him as he wished, unaware that Yunho was at his mercy via his screen.
Opening a tube and letting the sounds be heard, the young man kneaded his fingers for a while to let his audience enjoy it, before they came to brush his second intimacy.
"Good. Good... So good, so gentle and obedient~" Tensing at this new sensation, the livestream continued. And Yunho watched and obeyed.
Approaching his end, he hadn't expected one sentence to make him lose all control over his own body.
A simple sentence spoken in that deep, commanding voice, despite the softness in the tone.
"Now that you've been good, come and enjoy your treat~"
Feeling his soiled hands, his teeth having trapped a piece of his sheets to muffle his own whimper, it took him some time to return back to the surface. To realise what had just happened.
But before concentrating on it, he did one last new thing this evening.
[JYun99 sent : 20$]
꧁꧂
The ride was spent in the company of his music rather than the younger man. The latter, who also seemed to have had a bad night, had let himself be lulled by Yunho's driving to finish the night.
So when they parted after he had dropped Mingi at his destination, Yunho was delighted to arrive a few minutes later at his parents' house. Not that he was exhausted, but that was exactly the case. He had suffered the whole way.
He'd been blocking his vision at the thought of feeling any attraction other than friendly towards Mingi, and he'd found it hard not to turn his gaze towards him. How could he not want to observe the beauty of the sleeping man?
Taking advantage of his holidays and his parents, he enjoyed the day in their company. But he was rudely brought back to reality when he found himself lying in bed, staring at a ceiling that had seen him grow up.
Was he allowed to watch the videos? Here? Under the same roof as his parents? What if someone came in while he was asleep? What if his headphones fell out and let the man's sounds be heard?
Doubting what seemed the right thing to do, he found himself staying up all night.
Which was a bad idea, since his mother asked him to see a doctor the next day. Something he didn't do.
He preferred to open the application in the evening, after checking that his headphones were correctly plugged in and that the door of his bedroom was properly closed.
He slipped down under his sheets and timidly turned on one of the replay. How was he going to react? Was his body going to do the same thing again? Or would he remain indifferent to this man's nudity?
The first few minutes when sgmgasmr99 talked a little as he walked around the room were… decisive. Yunho could already feel the red rising to his ears and his teeth imprisoning his lips as his eyes tried to record every detail of the video.
When the video really began, he could see the man rubbing the back of his neck and his stomach, without looking for anything purely sexual this time. Yunho had already seen it, he'd seen them all. It was the show who changed him. Or well… It was the livestream and Mingi.
But luckily, having already seen the images playing before, despite the light moaning that could be heard as the man caressed himself, Yunho was able to find his beloved Morpheus. He let his thoughts run wild and let himself be lulled by the sounds of the video.
It was enough to wake him up the next morning with a great deal of discomfort. Especially as his phone was still playing a new show of the man. It showed sgmgasmr99 from behind, while his shiny fingers, coated with some sort of oil, made viscous sounds as he examined that part of his body.
Quickly switching off his screen and the audio, Yunho spent the morning enjoying the peace and tranquillity of his home. He then saw Mingi during the afternoon. They spent this part of the day rediscovering the streets of their childhood. It brought back good memories and showed Yunho some hints, or rather evidence, of how he really felt about his friend.
But he couldn't admit it to him.
❀❀❀
The rest of the holidays passed off without a hitch and when they returned to university, it was at this moment when sgmgasmr99 started a new livestream.
Yunho took part in it for the second time.
[JYun99: Your video helped me fall asleep at the beginning. But now I can't since I watched your last live stream... which was also my first one…]
Stopping in his tracks, his hands leaving his chest, the man approached the camera, raising the angle as close as possible to his neck. But he still didn't let a single bit of his face be seen.
“Oh, well... Thank you for being so pure~"
Despite the fact he couldn't see him, Yunho could sense that sgmgasmr99 was smiling at his message. What had possessed him to comment so suddenly?
"Tell me, you who only came here to sleep. Do you want me to help you fall into dreams in a whole new way~?"
God!
He had answered him directly! And he was sure the man had a smirk on his face!
[JYun99 : Yes please… Can you help me…?]
"Good pup~. So now, you just have to pay attention to my voice. Follow what I tell you to do. Let me guide you. Observe my actions, imagine yourself doing them to me or me doing them to you. Such a pure little soul~. I will give you a better way to reach Morpheus' arm."
This is how he caught the attention of the camboy, who didn't have a torrent of subscribers anyway. Which allowed him, if there was an exchange, to easily recognise the ones who were chatting.
That's how he began a new way of getting some sleep. Now he watched the replays as simple asmr videos. And the live shows were used to feel pleasure, while sinking into a deep sleep with each ecstasy, as soon as his body heat had subsided.
And he made himself so well known that other viewers would make fun of him in the comments. They called him "the innocent pup". Because he'd been the only one to see these videos only as asmr since somes months and not... as videos made directly for the pleasure of watching a man satisfying himself on screen.
So even though he'd never know the man, he'd always let himself be manipulated completely by him.
[JYun99: Thanks again for the live show. I think I'd die if people discover what kind of asmr I'm watching…]
"Oh... I think I will die too, if someone close to me discovers why I'm interested in the asmr he's watching. So don't be ashamed, pup. Why be ashamed when it helps you? Any help is good to take.”
That soft voice, so sweet and a little deep, put a smile on his face despite the few teases he got in the comments.
Yes. After all, he was only looking for sleep and sgmgasmr99, despite the strange way it looked, was helping him with his videos for five months now. He had been watching his live shows for the past two months. So it had been two months since he became sgmgasmr99's official pup.
[JYun99 : Thanks you for tonight~]
"Thanks you for being such a good pup. Goodnight little one~"
[JYun99 sent : 50$]
Never risking discovering his identity. Yunho couldn't imagine that the one who made his heart beat faster was there. Under this pseudonym: sgmgasmr99.
Neither could the other imagine Yunho's presence in his live feed. The one who invaded his thoughts every time he filmed himself was there. Present by the name of : JYun99.
End