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When you hold me in the street
They weren’t supposed to meet in public. Not where Silvermane guards could pass, or where Yanqing might notice Blade’s presence. But in a quiet marketplace of the Luofu, Blade’s hand brushed Caelus’ fingers—quick, electric. Just once.
And you kiss me on the dance floor
In a hidden corner of the Seat of Divine Foresight, during a celebration, they slipped away. Music echoed faintly. Blade leaned in and kissed him like no one else existed. Caelus kissed back, even though they both knew it couldn’t last.
I wish that it could be like that
Caelus sat on the Express’s observation deck alone later, watching stars pass. He imagined a world where they could sit like this together, his hand in Blade’s, without fear or shame.
Why can't it be like that?
Why was their love forbidden? Was it the curse Blade bore, or the factions they belonged to? Caelus didn’t know. He just knew that it hurt.
'Cause I'm yours
He never said it aloud, but Caelus knew who his heart beat for. Not Dan Heng. Not anyone else. Just Blade. Always Blade.
---
We keep behind closed doors
Their meetings were always hidden. Back alleys. Locked rooms. Shadows. Caelus hated it, but Blade was firm. “It’s safer this way,” he said, every time.
Every time I see you, I die a little more
And every time Caelus left him, a piece of him stayed behind. A smile unsaid. A longing untouched. It wasn’t fair.
Stolen moments that we steal as the curtain falls
Their nights were short. Often after battles, between missions. Blade would patch Caelus up silently, his hands careful, gaze lingering. “Stay,” Caelus whispered once. Blade only turned away.
It'll never be enough
Blade wanted to protect him by keeping his distance. But it didn’t protect Caelus from the aching emptiness. Nothing ever did.
---
It's obvious you're meant for me
To Caelus, it was undeniable. Blade understood him—his rage, his loss, the silence between stars. No one else saw him the way Blade did.
Every piece of you, it just fits perfectly
Even the broken parts—Blade’s bloodstained hands, his fractured mind—they felt like a mirror to Caelus’ own chaos. They weren’t whole alone. But together, they made something fierce, something beautiful.
Every second, every thought, I'm in so deep
It consumed him. Even while fighting alongside March or Dan Heng, his mind wandered: Was Blade okay? Was he thinking of him too?
But I'll never show it on my face
He couldn't risk it. Not where Kafka might see. Not with the Astral Express watching him. So Caelus smiled like nothing hurt.
---
But we know this
They both knew. From the very first time their blades clashed in a mission gone wrong. From the first time they kissed and then turned away.
We got a love that is hopeless
And yet… they kept holding on. Even when they said they wouldn’t. Even when they shouldn’t.
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Why can't you hold me in the street?
Caelus once reached out to Blade in a crowded square on the Luofu. Just a hand. Just one touch. But Blade stepped back.
Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor?
The music in the Seat played again another night, but Blade didn’t come. Caelus danced with March, smiled for her… but his heart wasn’t in it.
I wish that it could be like that
He wished it every day. A world where Blade would walk beside him. Not behind him. Not hidden. Not afraid.
Why can't it be like that?
Why did the universe give him something so beautiful, only to tear it away?
'Cause I'm yours
He’d chosen Blade the moment he saw past his title. Past “Immortal.” Past “monster.” Just the man beneath.
---
When you're with him, do you call his name
Blade hated watching Caelus laugh with Dan Heng, or rest against Welt’s shoulder after missions. He didn’t speak, but the jealousy burned.
Like you do when you're with me?
No. He knew the way Caelus whispered his name. Knew the sound of it gasped between kisses, whispered in half-sleep. It was his alone.
Does it feel the same?
Of course it didn’t. But Blade still wondered, even if the answer killed him.
Would you leave if I was ready to settle down?
He asked once—quietly—if Caelus would stay if he ever could be normal. No killing. No madness. Just them. Caelus said yes. No hesitation.
Or would you play it safe and stay?
But Blade knew the truth. Caelus had a duty. The Express. The stars. He couldn’t ask him to abandon it all.
---
You know this
They both carried their truths in silence. In longing glances. In unspoken I-love-yous.
We got a love that is hopeless
But it didn’t stop them from holding on anyway.
---
Why can't you hold me in the street?
It haunted Caelus. He dreamed of walking through a city hand-in-hand. No masks. No secrets.
Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor?
He dreamed of dancing with Blade at some forgotten festival, eyes soft, smile real. But Blade always vanished before the dream ended.
I wish that it could be like that
More than anything, he wished they could stop pretending.
Why can't we be like that?
Was it Blade’s curse? Caelus’ light? Fate?
'Cause I'm yours
Even if the world refused to accept it. Caelus was his. And Blade… was his, too.
---
I don't wanna live love this way
Blade clenched his jaw, standing alone as the Express pulled away. He was tired of being a ghost.
I don't wanna hide us away
He wanted the world to know. That the Trailblazer who saved galaxies loved him.
I wonder if it ever will change
Would the day come where they could stop running?
I'm living for that day
He didn’t say it aloud. But he was waiting. Fighting. Hoping.
Someday
Caelus turned from the glass of the Express window. He closed his eyes and whispered, “Someday…”
---
Why can't you hold me in the street?
The question echoed across stars.
Why can't I kiss you on the dance floor?
A wish, carried in silence.
I wish that it could be like that
One day, maybe it could be.
Why can't we be like that?
And until then...
'Cause I'm yours
They would love, even in the shadows.