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After hours of traveling, and an excessive amount of questions on Dina's behalf, nightfall was finally approaching. So far, their journey had been easy; they had left shortly after 3:00 a.m. and had been on the road ever since with no infected, raiders, or Wolves in sight. Of course, that was where Dina and Ellie’s luck ran out; it started to pour.
“Are you fucking kidding me?” muttered Ellie under her breath as she struggled for the umpteenth time to connect the pole to the base of the tent.
Dina walked around from her perfectly set-up half of the tent and decided the best way to finish setting it up was to stand directly behind Ellie, placing her hands over the other’s and attaching the final pole with ridiculous ease.
“There,” she said. “Was that so hard?”
The contact and the ghost of Dina’s breath on Ellie’s neck as she spoke made her flush, and she struggled to stutter out, “Shut up. We’re getting drenched. Let’s go inside.”
Dina laughed and sauntered into the tent, leaving Ellie more confused than ever before she gathered herself and entered the small orange alcove.
In the short time it took Ellie to gather her thoughts, Dina had removed her wet top, leaving her dressed in only a thin white camisole and the now damp jeans she had been wearing on their travels. If Ellie looked close enough, she could see the pink of Dina’s bra barely showing through her top. Not that Ellie was paying much mind to what Dina was wearing, or to the newly exposed skin.
Ellie was quickly pulled from her thoughts as Dina handed her a spare T-shirt to dry her hair.
“Holy shit, that came on fast,” Ellie said, doing her best to get her hair as dry as possible. “How the fuck did you know that was gonna happen?”
Dina laughed, her grin always making Ellie’s stomach churn, and said, “I’m a witch.”
“Clearly.”
Dina laid down, leaving Ellie to observe her as she finished wringing the water out of her hair.
Sleepovers weren’t new for them. In fact, Dina had probably spent more nights at Ellie’s than she ever did at Jesse’s, a thought that made Ellie smile whenever she really thought about it. Whether in the garage with Ellie or the main house learning from Joel, Dina had been a staple at the Miller household.
But this was the closest the pair had been since The Kiss. The kiss that, in the moments when Ellie wasn’t overcome with her grief for Joel, she allowed herself to think about. A brief respite from the constant swirl of anger and sadness that had become her new normal.
And now, with Dina lying less than a foot away from her, Ellie wanted nothing more than to reach out. But Dina was high, and that kiss had meant nothing, no matter how much Ellie wished it had. Now miles from Jackson, Ellie didn’t want to risk years of friendship.
So she stopped herself and told Dina goodnight, flicking off their small lamp and leaving the tent in darkness.
The silence and darkness were quickly broken as Dina suddenly turned over with a playful grin on her face.
“I have a stupid question. It’s about New Year’s Eve, and, you know… The Kiss.”
Ellie’s heart dropped. She didn’t know if it was a good or bad thing. Did this mean Dina had wanted it? Was she going to take it back? Had she realized she hated Ellie after kissing her and couldn’t be this close to her? As these thoughts raced around Ellie’s head, she did her best to play it cool.
“Okay. I mean, whatever, you were super high.”
“And you were drunk.”
“Right, so it didn’t mean anything if that’s what you’re asking.”
The words killed Ellie as she said them because the kiss had meant something to her. After years of pining, Dina had finally kissed her, said that she and Jesse were done for good, and fucking kissed her.
And now here they were, three months later, alone in a tent, in the rain, in the middle of the woods, talking about one of the few things Ellie had been trying very hard not to think of.
“No, I know that,” Dina said, unaware of Ellie’s true feelings. “My question is… how would you rate it? Scale of one to ten.”
“No,” Ellie replied, turning slightly away from Dina. She was not going to rate the kiss, at least not truthfully. How do you tell the girl you’ve crushed on for over a year that the drunken kiss you shared three months ago was nothing short of life-altering?
“Come on,” Dina said with a smile that she knew Ellie could never resist. “You’ve kissed girls before. You’re gay. I’m not. I’m just curious. I wanna know if I’m any good at it.”
The words cut Ellie like a knife. You’re gay. I’m not. So much for hoping.
“One to ten,” Dina reiterated.
It was clear Dina wouldn’t let it drop, and Ellie just wanted the stupid conversation to end. So if Dina was going to piss her off, then Ellie would too.
“Okay, fine. Six.”
“Fuck you, six,” Dina exclaimed.
Ellie knew she’d be upset. Dina liked to be good at things, and clearly, kissing girls, even if she wasn’t gay, was one of them.
“That’s not bad,” Ellie replied, sitting up.
And really, it wasn’t. Ellie’s kiss with Riley had been an eight, sure, but her first kiss with Cat was a two or three at best. Two inexperienced teenagers, one of whom ran off crying because she thought she infected the other, didn’t make for the best kissing experience.
Her words did nothing to calm Dina, who rolled over, still exclaiming, “That sucks!”
At this point, Ellie was starting to get confused. Sure, Dina liked to be good at things. All those hours learning construction from Joel made that clear. But maybe her frustration meant something more?
She allowed herself to hope, just a little, as she asked, “What?”
Dina scoffed, saying, “For the record, I don’t believe you.”
So, did she care if Ellie liked the kiss or not? But what about Jesse? Now Ellie was even more confused than she’d been two seconds ago.
She asked to be sure, worried about the answer. “Well, you asked, and I told you. I’m sorry. You can go back to Jesse.”
“I already did.”
And there it was. Stupid Ellie. Of course Dina didn’t like her. She said it herself. She wasn’t even gay, she was high, and the kiss had meant nothing.
“Well, there you have it,” Ellie said, rolling over, completely fucking done with the conversation.
For some reason, Dina decided now was the perfect time to continue talking about Jesse, who Ellie was starting to think was the bane of her existence.
But Ellie liked Dina, and she was clearly worried about him, so they talked about the stupid boy Dina had gone and fucked after kissing Ellie. She would talk to Dina about almost anything she asked her to, no matter how much it hurt to do it.
“Well, good night,” Dina said, finally ending the conversation and turning off the lantern.
“Night.”
Like before, the silence lasted no more than a minute before Dina spoke again.
“Ellie? I wasn’t that high.”
She let Dina’s words sink in, trying to decide what to say back, if anything.
Eventually, she settled on a similar confession. “I wasn’t that drunk.”
Ellie turned to face Dina as she said those words, finding the other girl already looking right at her. The tent was small, and with both of them facing each other, their noses were nearly touching.
“At least seven,” Dina whispered.
“Seven what?” Ellie didn’t think it was possible, but now she was even more confused.
She was tired after a long day of riding, and her emotions were a mess after Dina told her she wasn’t gay and got back with Jesse, and now Dina was talking about random numbers?
“There were a lot of people around.”
Ellie didn’t reply and just stared at Dina, confused.
“I’d rate the kiss at least a seven.”
Ellie glanced down at Dina’s lips then looked up at her eyes, surprised to find her pupils dilated and the earlier mirth gone, replaced with what Ellie could only describe as nerves.
“I was honest with you, so will you be honest with me? Scale of one to ten. One being absolute trash, and ten being life-altering… how would you rate our kiss?”
Ellie felt like she was sinking into Jello. What the fuck was happening? Did she fall asleep? Was that why Dina was suddenly saying she liked the kiss while her lips were so close Ellie could feel her every breath?
Worried this was a joke or a dream, Ellie stuck with her original answer. “Still a six.”
“You’re infuriating,” Dina replied, laughing and somehow leaning even closer, her eyes still locked on Ellie’s lips.
Was Dina flirting? All Ellie could focus on was their closeness, the heat radiating off Dina’s arms, the pink bra peeking from her camisole, and the overwhelming, spiraling thought of just what the fuck.
Somehow, Ellie managed to play it cool and flirt back.
“Have you even met you?”
“You make me want to go back outside into that storm,” Dina said, tucking a damp strand behind Ellie’s ear.
“No one is stopping you,” Ellie replied, moving a hand to Dina’s waist.
“This better be better than a six,” Dina murmured, her hand still on Ellie’s face.
And with that, Dina leaned in.