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Wukong had actually been in a PHENOMENAL mood today. He had been so, so happy and he had been GLOWING according to everyone he encountered.
After what felt like FOREVER Sun Wukong could finally go and visit Yang Jian again.
He had been so overwhelmed with duties and responsibilities as the Monkey King of Hua Guo Shan that he hadn’t been able to even breathe in peace. But how, he could!
“Dawang, we-
“Ask Marshal Beng.”
“But-but I am Marshal Beng?…”
“Then ask Marshal Liu.”
“I’ve already asked him and all the other Marshals.”
“Then find Liu Er.”
“But he left a while ago-“
“You’re smart! You’ll figure it out!” Wukong finished wrapping up his gifts and brushed off the other monkey’s questions. He didn’t want to hear it. Nope. Nope. Nope.
Not today! Today he was free! It was his off day for once and he was going to cherish it as such!
“Byeeeeee!!”
“Dawang PLEASE!”
***
However, Wukong had expected to find Erlang at GuanJiangKou alone and possibly missing WUKONG’S WONDERFUL PRESENCE! He was a blessing of course and he shall grant Erlang it.
But when he got there, he was instead greeted with the sight of Erlang with another woman?? And she-she was kissing him!! And Erlang hadn’t even pushed her away!!
The-the cheater wanted it!! Wukong had been so furious he threw down the jars of wine he had brought, making a loud crash sound and startling the “lovely couple.” He leaped away in a rage before he could see Erlang’s reaction.
***
So now he was fuming! He was so, so AGGRAVATED! Never in his life had he been so disappointed! Disrespected!
…and depressed.
After his initial anger, he slowly began to breakdown and bawled while curled up on his stone bed. Liu Er had heard his voice sobbing and appeared from the shadows, giving him comfort and making him his favorite soup.
“He-I thought he loved me!”
“Mhm.”
“He’s a worthless trashy b*tch anyways!!”
“Yep.”
“I never want to see him again! I’ll kill him if he appears!!”
“Hm.”
But…that couldn’t be further from the truth. Wukong actually wanted so, so desperately to go back to Erlang and demand to know why? Why had he done this?
Back when Erlang kissed him for the very first time at Bibotan and told Wukong that he “loved him with all his heart. I will never love another.” Wukong was ecstatic! He reciprocated and confessed that he also really loved Erlang but cheekily teased that Erlang would have to earn his hand in marriage.
Erlang had smiled and agreed to his “demands” and after making an oath under the moonlit night, they became officially in courting status!
So…maybe they were that officially together but Wukong had always assumed their agreement did not include “open” courting with others!! How could Erlang have done that to him?? Wukong had been so faithful!
But maybe Erlang realized that…he didn’t really like Wukong all that much. Maybe Erlang changed his preferences in mates.
Was his type now pretty young female immortals? With hourglass shaped bodies and perfectly shaped faces with a symmetrical proportion? Like those beauties described in those stories?
Like the female who had leaned in close and kiss-
Wukong huffs and scuffs in his spoonfuls of soup faster, making Liu Er worried that he might choke.
If that's the type of lover Erlang wanted, then Wukong will oblige! He’ll never accept this humiliation! This rejection without a fight!
“Liu Er, teach me how to act like a proper lady.”
Liu Er coughs, choking on his own saliva. “I’m sorry, what?”
***
First step was transforming into Erlang’s ideal type. Physically. Then they’ll work on the gestures and etiquettes and behavior etc.
Wukong transforms into a young lady, but with a flat chest. Then he transforms again into someone with an hourglass figure like in those drawings and lengthens his hair. Liu Er also mentions how usually, females didn’t possess golden or ginger colored hair so Wukong also made sure to make his own hair dark, to only black color.
Dress wise was easier. Wukong already loved to dress in elegant male robes and fashion so wearing a female robe wasn’t all that different. In fact, he actually loved how beautiful this dress was. He felt so graceful!
“How does it look?”
Liu Er nodded and gave him a thumbs up.
“Now, time to work on elegance!”
Just then, Marshal Ma came in and bowed, reporting that Erlang Shen had arrived and requested Wukong’s attention. Marshal Ma was a bit confused when he saw what his king appeared as but decided not to comment.
Guess it was too late. Wukong (eagerly) stormed off to greet their guest. Liu Er and Marshal Ma shared a look. Then both went their separate ways.
***
Wukong dusts his invisible wrinkles and dirt off his elegant clothing and prepares to present this new (and improved?) version of himself to Erlang.
He meekly opens the door, allowing Erlang to come in. Erlang immediately recognizes that this was Wukong in disguise and was so shocked, he was speechless.
“Wu-Wukong??”
Wukong bashfully nods and sits down with a gentle smile, imitating the way he’s seen other women do. He’s a fast learner (extremely adaptable and intelligent) and when motivated, could learn almost anything.
And he was motivated right now.
“Wukong, what-what is this? What are you doing?” Erlang sat down at the table still staring at Wukong’s new appearance and chillingly quiet demeanor.
This was-this was almost unbearable.
“Erlang Shen, do you like this?” Wukong flutters his eyelashes which were thick and perfectly shaped. He puts a sleeved hand up to his mouth, acting shy and coy.
“I…do…” Erlang said, a bit hesitantly.
Wukong puffs up his now perfectly rosy cheeks and pouts with his perfectly shaped red lips. He was annoyed that his hunch was actually correct this time.
He had hoped that Erlang wouldn’t actually admit it. But it’s true. This was the type he liked. A perfect, impeccably beautiful woman with elegance like a phoenix.
Not the brash, rude loud mouth monkey that bursted out of a rock. He knew he was ugly but he didn’t care about other mortal’s opinions.
But….he does care about Erlang’s.
Truth be told, he really did love Erlang. And it really stung to know that even the Great Illustrious Sage had such tastes.
He reaches over to touch Erlang’s hand that had been placed on the table. Why was the Sage’s hand so shaky? Was he intimidated by Wukong’s newfound charm?
His palm was now delicately soft and smooth, pure white skin that matched Erlang’s own. No longer the furry slightly rough hands with sharp claws at the tips when not retracted.
“Erlang, care for a date with me?” He bashfully requested.
Erlang nodded but his eyes for some reason didn’t have a touch of warmth or eagerness like before, only…trepidation?
Wukong decides he’s going to have to step up his game to truly win Erlang’s love. Clearly the guy was feeling anxious because he still remembered Wukong’s old less pleasant self! He had to erase all aspects of that and make Erlang see his new wonderful qualities!
***
It had been a month since Wukong’s “transformation” and while he had gotten better and better at playing the part of a lovely, elegant female, Erlang had somehow felt more and more distant.
He had even started avoiding Wukong. Why?? Was he still not good enough?? Did he still go see other females that were more deserving of his attention?? Even if they were only courting partners, that doesn't mean you’re allowed to flirt with others!!
Finally, Wukong’s had ENOUGH of Erlang skittish behavior towards him. What was so wrong? What was so bad about Sun Wukong? Everyone loved him!! Except for…Erlang.
Wukong finally forces Erlang to talk to him. When Erlang made another lame attempt to excuse himself and leave Wukong’s side, Wukong pulled him back and locked the exit.
Erlang shifted his eyes around, not even wanting to look at him.
What the fuck???
“Erlang Shen, please. Have I done something to displease you? Have I offended you in some regard? Please, elaborate-“
“Stop it. Please stop this. I-I can’t handle it anymore, it’s driving me insane!!” Erlang suddenly walked over to him and grabbed his slender shoulders, shaking them roughly.
“Whatever do you mean, Erlang Shen? This is who I am now.”
Erlang shook his head feverishly. “No, no it’s not. Please just go back to normal. This is not the real you.”
Wukong angrily shakes and pulls his hands away, turning around to avoid letting Erlang see his tears.
“You…but you don’t like the real me. So, this IS the real me now. I did this for you and you don’t even appreciate my efforts! I worked so hard!!” Wukong forces his voice to stop trembling. He was NOT some weak crybaby.
“What?? I do like the real you! The real Sun Wukong is the one I fell in love with! Not this fake disturbing image you’ve disguised yourself as!!”
Wukong turns around, indignant at this critique. “LIAR! You don’t like the real me! THIS “disturbing image” is what you actually fancy!!”
“No it’s NOT!!”
“Yes it is! Then why else would you have kissed a person who looked just like this! And you still don’t admit it!!” Wukong starts sobbing, even his cries have turned into a dainty lady’s weeping. And Erlang has noticed.
“What are you-
Erlang pauses for a second. Then a look of realization comes to his eyes.
“That-that person was NOT my secret lover. She’s like a sister to me, an old friend. But she suddenly pulled me down and gave me a kiss after confessing that she had feelings for me. I had rejected her and pitied her, not pushing her away. It was a goodbye kiss! Because I DON’T like her!!”
Erlang grabs Wukong and embraces him, nose recoiling a bit at the flowery perfume that the monkey had sprayed on his neck.
“I would never cheat on you. You’re the only one I have ever loved and will ever love. I don’t want to be with anyone else. You are mine. So please, please. Just return to your old self. I don’t even recognize you anymore. And it’s making me go mad…”
Wukong glows and transforms back into his original form. Truth be told, it was hard work to maintain that illusion this whole time. His monkey subjects had even avoided him because of his strange new gestures and appearance. Plus, it took spiritual energy to keep the illusion on.
Erlang leans back and feels an overwhelming feeling of relief. He doesn’t think twice and leans in to kiss Wukong.
Wukong was shocked at how straight forward Erlang was but gleefully reciprocated the gesture, kissing back with enthusiasm.
Erlang really wants to wash all that perfume away, to smell Wukong's naturally earthy scent and peachy fragrance.
***
Erlang from then on kept touching Wukong. He would rub and pet his fluffy head and kiss him on the neck and lips, softly confessing “I love you.” Wukong would blush and happily say it back, accepting the physical affection with contentment.
At night, Erlang even slept over at Hua Guo Shan and cuddled with Wukong, pulling his smaller frame into his arms and sniffing.
Sometimes when Wukong would talk to him with that “etiquette” language, Erlang would shudder with fear and shut him up by sealing his lips. He wanted NONE of that. Wukong could be as outspoken as he desired.
After the courting period, Erlang finally asked Wukong to marry him and of course, they got engaged.
***
During their wedding night, Erlang gently kisses him while they were spooning in bed and Wukong muses about how they arrived to where they were now.
“I still can’t believe that you like someone like me.”
Erlang kisses his cheek and asks, “What do you mean?”
“I mean…most people don’t find someone like me attractive. My personality is a bit too overwhelming and my face is scary.”
Erlang looks at the adorable fluffy monkey spirit lying beside him, face angelic and with a perfect, soft body overall in his opinion. Whoever thought he was unattractive was absolutely BLIND. He even fitted perfectly into Erlang’s arms, like he was born to sleep there.
“You are perfect. I’ll never love another.”
Wukong smiled and giggled softly, kissing Erlang’s lips and they started tumbling together, hugging closer and closer…
The night was young and the couple was in bliss.