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That Was All You, Kid!

Summary:

“Enough killing! I would never advocate for that.” Said Pillow, very ironically, in BFDIA 14.

In BFDIA 15, Pillow learns a valuable life lesson.

Notes:

This was written with belovedCreator on ao3 but she has co-creator invites off 😔
Still, big thanks to her!

Work Text:

Blocky was doing one of his pranks, as usual. Everyone in the TLC had to suffer through one of these every month or so. It was the most interesting thing that happened every month though, so who was really complaining? 

 

Well, one object was complaining. She had seen these go on a few times now, and couldn’t bear to see it happen again. Though, she didn’t have the biggest voice, so she approached cautiously at first…

 

..Pillow made her way through the other contestants and over the line separating the TLC. What was Blocky doing this time..? No way. It couldn’t be.. An infinite loop of Teardrop boiling…

 

“Hey, uhh! That looks really painful for Teardrop and Roboty.. Shouldn’t you be doing pranks that are funny? ” Pillow asked, raising an eyebrow as her arms dangled by her sides.

 

Blocky turned to look at Pillow with a smug smirk and a raised eyebrow.

 

“What are you talking about, Cushiony? This is HILARIOUS! ” Blocky insisted, chuckling under his breath.

 

Pillow flinched and held up a finger.

 

“Actually, my name is-”

 

“Here bro, hold my pan. Keep the funny rolling.” Blocky instructed to no one in particular.

 

The red building block then proceeded to saunter over to Pillow and wrapped an arm around her shoulders.

 

“Look, kid, I’ve been in this business for a looong time. You’ve gotta learn to loosen up! See the humour in everyday life! And if you can’t see it… MAKE it! ” Blocky encouraged her with a toothy grin. He was.. Quite the motivator. 

 

“Uhm…” Pillow muttered, contemplating his advice. Blocky was a little too close for comfort..

 

She tried to step away from the prankster, only for him to squeeze her even tighter to his side as he basked in his own ego.

 

“Look, just stick with me. I’ll show you the ropes! We’ve got a whole LOL’s worth of targets right here!

 

But I’m not-

 

“You’ll be my apprentice! Come on, let me show you how to pick out a PRIME target for pranking. Ever handled an explosive before?” Blocky asked casually.

 

“N-NO??” Pillow sputtered, panicking at the calmness in Blocky’s voice.

 

Re-LAX, it’s just little stuff! We’ve gotta work you up to the BIG booms! Now, take these firecrackers and pick your target.”

 

Pillow looked down at the pan, feeling terrible for keeping up Teardrop’s silent screams of pain. Roboty was a robot, which was different. She didn’t know much about how a robot could cry..

 

Suddenly, Blocky grabbed the pan back from her and placed a full stick of firecrackers in Pillow’s hands.

 

There, use Firey Jr to light it! If you can’t pick, just throw it onto that side and see what happens!!! ” Blocky encouraged, waving his arms around in the air by the end of his sentence due to sheer excitement.

 

“Wuh-!” Pillow gasped.

 

The TLCers on the other side of the line let out one, combined scream of terror as Blocky encouraged her. Pillow shook her head firmly, holding the firecrackers far away from Firey Jr.

 

No! I thought we couldn’t be recovered in the TLC! This is so irresponsible! And- And gimmie that!

 

Blocky’s cocky smile disappeared when Pillow firmly grasped the handle of the hot pan and tried to pull it away to free Teardrop from her torment. The young man scowled and planted his feet firmly as he pulled the pan back.

 

“Hey! I didn’t say I was done with her!”

 

“Well, I’m saying you are! Let go!

 

YOU let go!!”

 

The pair engaged in a vicious tug of war with poor Teardrop’s fate hanging in the balance. Unfortunately, Pillow’s foot slipped on some of Roboty’s spilled tears and she fell flat on her back. From the sheer force of Blocky’s pulling, the frying pan went flying up over his head, sending the pan and the droplet sailing through the air with a silent scream.

 

The frying pan landed with a violent clang to the ground before spinning to a still state. Teardrop landed with a splatter on the ground, but reformed herself within a second. She was visibly dizzy, her eyes twirling. Most of the TLC let out an “awwww…”

 

“GRRRR!!!!” Blocky growled, “ Well, at least Roboty’s still crying! Hahaha! Isn’t that hilarious?”

 

“No!”

 

Pillow picked herself up and moved Blocky’s automatic punching machine out of the way, relieving Roboty of his pain as well.

 

“What’s your problem, Cushiony?! Don’t you get it? This stuff is fun! You know how many people watch this stuff?” Blocky scowled.

 

“But.. It doesn’t make sense!” Pillow strained, trying to understand.

 

“It makes PERFECT sense!!” Blocky stomped the ground, “Pain and misfortune are the CORNERSTONE of comedy! Haven’t you ever watched a video on the internet? Or heck, a slapstick comedy or… cartoons?? The more violence the BETTER!! ” Blocky explained, clenching his fist in the air. 

 

“A-All you’re doing is making people upset!” Pillow stated firmly, balling her fists up as well.

 

“Well, you’re making me upset. Look just… chill the heck out. Stop being the fun police and stressing out over everyone. See, that’s why you’re miserable, Cushiony! You need to sit down and just… look around. Everyone’s fine!”

 

Blocky proceeded to gesture around them to the other TLCers.

 

“None of the damage is ever permanent. Even if someone dies, it doesn’t even matter.”

 

“But.. but we don’t even have a recovery center in the TLC! We’d have to get out first!” Pillow protested yet again.

 

Oh. My gosh . Do I have to explain everything to you?? We’ll just revive them when we get outa here!!” Blocky’s own voice started to strain, like he was teaching Pillow a basic concept and she wasn’t understanding. 

 

“But…! You can’t just kill people! It’s a disturbance!!

 

“Oh yeah? You wanna bet?”

 

“Yeah!!”

 

Blocky walked back and grabbed the frying pan from off the ground, shaking some water off of its gleaming edges. He turned around and wore a friendly smile.

 

“Come here for a second-”

 

Blocky beckoned Pillow with a wave of his hand. It sounded like he was going to tell her something. Pillow didn’t suspect anything and simply walked forward. Once she was close enough, Blocky brought his arm back and slammed the frying pan right against her face.

 

Pillow fell to the ground with an “Ouch!” An entire side of her body had been forced inwards in by the impact.

 

“Hahaha! Everyone, isn’t that hilarious??” Blocky asked, bringing his arms up and waiting for applause. 

 

Just as he expected, TLC burst into laughter. This was comedy. Pillow stood up and puffed her body back into place, slightly stunned and let down as she rubbed her bruised cheek.

 

Blocky held his arms open wide and basked in the laughter like the finest praise.

 

“You hear that? That was all you, kid! Heh. You’ll learn. Just stop taking everything so seriously!”

 

He then proceeded to shove the frying pan into her hands and gave her a patronizing pat on the head. Pillow watched as Blocky returned to his friend group before looking down at the pan with a trembling lip. She was so embarrassed. Why wasn’t anyone else speaking up to support her? Didn’t they want Blocky to stop hurting them too?

 

Did they somehow think it was.. Okay?

 

“… I don’t… understand…”

 

She looked back up and her face dropped even more when she realized that pretty much everyone had already moved on from the spectacle. It was as if Blocky’s cruel prank had never even happened. Just a quick laugh. She was hurt and disappointed.

 

Pillow slowly returned to her side of the line with the other BFDIA failed debuters. No one bothered to ask her how she was doing. She needed to understand Blocky’s perspective. Anyone’s perspective here.

 

The customs of this world.. Of Goiky, was screwed. Who lets death happen just because it can be reversed? What kind of mindset was that?

 

Pillow huddled up in the corner, watching every object with interest. 

 

She needed to do some research.

 

She needed a notepad.