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Celina leaned casually against Lucy's door, a steaming cup of tea cradled in her hands and a knowing look playing at the corners of her mouth. “So, can I expect to see Tim around more often?”
Lucy, laying across her bed absently picking a thread, froze. “What? No, why would you think that?”
Celina lifted one shoulder in an easy shrug. “Dunno..” she held up a finger in thought, “Though I did catch him trying to sneak out this morning.”
Lucy's face flushed. “Oh that was… nothing. We were just blowing off steam you know, uh. A one time thing.”
Celina raised her brows and took a sip of her tea. “Mm. More like three.”
“Celina!” Lucy admonished, lobbing a throw pillow in her direction.
“What? Girl, I’m just saying,” Celina grinned. “Your aura has been crazy glowy.
Lucy groaned, burying her face in her hands. “Okay, I'm sorry. Yes, it was… three times. But I start on the night shift tomorrow, officially. So... So that’s it. Nothing else is going to happen.”
Celina took another sip, clearly unconvinced. “Mhm.”
“I mean it!” Lucy insisted.
And she did. Mostly.
This wasn’t a relationship—it was just… celebrating. Her promotion, the end of a long week, maybe the fact that things weren’t awkward between them anymore. Whatever. It was physical. Fun. Temporary. Tim hadn’t said anything about wanting more.
Sure, he’d told her he still loved her—when they were literally on fire and he thought they might not make it out. But that was months ago. And since then, they’d kept things simple. Easy. Casual.
Safe.
Because at the end of the day, she trusted him—with her body, with her life. He’d always handled both with care. But her heart?
She’d given that to him once. And look where that got her.
He'd walked away so easily. And yes, he did eventually tell her that it was a means of punishing himself… but. What if he did it again?
What if she let him back in, let herself believe in a future again—marriage, kids, a home filled with laughter—and one day, without warning, he spiraled. Would she be collateral damage? Again? Their children, just another consequence of his self-destruction?
All the possible scenarios of him leaving their happy life flashed through her mind, and each one felt like a fresh bruise on something that had just barely started to heal.
No, safe was easier.
Safe didn’t leave.
Safe didn’t hurt.
Safe was something she could control.
She was in control.
And that mattered, more than she wanted to admit.
But enough about that. She had bigger things to focus on now. She was a Sergeant. A Sergeant.
And surprisingly, the night shift wasn’t as bad as she’d expected.
The sleep adjustment had wrecked her at first—her body rebelled, her brain lagged—but eventually, she found her rhythm.
At first, she didn’t know her officers as well as she’d have liked, but she made it a priority, one-on-one check-ins, ride-alongs, casual coffee runs that turned into trust-building. And in return, they offered her their confidence and respect.
She felt sharp. Grounded. Powerful. Like she was exactly where she was meant to be.
It felt good.
Almost perfect.
Almost.
She missed her friends.
She and Celina barely crossed paths anymore, despite sharing an apartment. And Nolan was a ghost these days, their texts always ending with “we have to catch up soon” and no follow-through.
And Tim…
Tim hadn’t reached out in weeks.
Not even a check-in.
That was fine. It was fine. She was fine. She was… in control.
So she texted, just a simple “Hey”
And the next morning she found herself in his bed.
She stretched lazily beneath the sheets, letting out a quiet sigh at the pleasant aches in her body. “Hmm, well… thanks for this. I should get going. I have shift tonight, so I need to squeeze in some sleep.”
Tim turned his head toward her and offered a lazy smile. “I have the day off, you can stay if you want, sleep. I'll make you something to eat before you go in.”
“Lucy leaned over to give him a quick kiss. “That's sweet, but no. Thanks.” She pushed herself up, looking around for her clothes.
Tim pushed up onto his elbows, watching her dress with a softness she didn’t have the bandwidth to acknowledge. “Right. Probably easier for you anyway. All your stuff’s at home.”
“Exactly,” she replied, slipping her shirt on and flipping her hair out of the collar. “Gotta go,” she added, slinging her bag over her shoulder. “See you later.”
A few days later her phone buzzed.
Tim: When's your next day off?
Lucy stared at the message for a moment, her thumb hovering.
Okay. He was reaching out. That was… good? Probably. She had texted him first, opened the door again as it were. This was him responding to that.
He was just… giving her what he thought she wanted.
This was fine.
She was still in control.
Lucy: Couple days.. why?
Tim: Come over?
Her stomach fluttered, but she told herself not to read too much into it. It would be just another night.
When Tim opened the door, Lucy lunged at him. Lips brushing his jaw, mouth, neck. Anywhere she could reach as she tried to guide him backwards down the hall.
Tim made a muffled sound, his hands coming up gently to her shoulders to push her back. “Lucy, wait, what..”
She blinked, breathless. “Isn't this what you want?” she asked coyly, tilting her head and leaning in for another kiss.
“No.” Tim said firmly, still holding her back.
Lucy flinched, immediately stepping back. So much for control.
Realizing his mistake, Tim panicked. “W-wait, no that came out wrong. Yes. Yes, I want you. Of course I do. Just… not like this. Not only like this.”
Embarrassed, Lucy scuffed her toe on the ground. “Okay, then… what do you want?”
Tim reached for her hand, “You.”
She swallowed, forcing a teasing smile as she tried to steer them toward his bedroom again. “I’m right here. For the taking.”
But he didn’t move. His grip tightened slightly. “No, Lucy. That's not what I meant. I want you. I want.. my Lucy.”
Lucy slipped her hand from his, shaking her head. “I-I don't…”
“Just…” Tim took a breath, eyes locked on hers. “Just hear me out, okay? And if you want to leave after, I’ll understand. I won’t stop you. Just, let me say this, please?”
He guided her to his couch and kneeled in front of her. “Lucy, I know that I broke us, that I broke your heart. And I know that kind of damage… it doesn’t just go away. That trust we had, it’s going to take time. Maybe a long time. But I want to earn it back.”
Lucy shook her head quickly, instinctively. “Please, you don't have to do this.”
“Yes, I do,” he said softly. “Because walking away from you… that was the biggest mistake of my life. I told myself it was about protecting you from the mess I was, but the truth is… I just wanted to punish myself. And I chose the one way that would hurt the most. I didn’t stop to think about how it would hurt you.”
His eyes glistened. “I am so sorry, Lucy. More than I could ever put into words. But if you’ll let me.. I'd like to show you. Every day, if you'll allow it, of who I am now. Who I’ve worked to become, for you and for me.”
She didn’t say anything right away. Just sniffed and finally, finally met his eyes.
Tim reached for her hands, folding them between his. “Lucy, I never stopped loving you. You are.. the greatest love of my life.”
Her throat bobbed with a swallow. “But what if it’s not like it was before?”
“It won’t be,” he said honestly. “And maybe that’s a good thing. Because back then we didn’t always talk. We held back, danced around the hard stuff. But now… we don’t have to pretend we’re not scared, or guarded.” He gave her a faint smile. “We can do it differently. Better. With honesty. And if we do that, I really believe we’ll be stronger than we were before.”
“Lucy let out a shaky breath. “You sound so sure.. I don't.. I don't even know how to be in a relationship anymore Tim.”
He squeezed her hands. “Then let's pick up where we left off.”
Lucy tilted her head, looking at him warily.
“I think we could take at least one obstacle out of the way. Eliminate some of the distance while we work through the rest.. move in with me?”
Lucy blinked. “Tim… that’s a really big step.”
“I know,” he said simply. “But it’s one we were headed for. And I don’t want to wait anymore to build a life with you. Even if it looks different than we imagined.”
She exhaled heavily, intertwining their fingers. “We'll talk, everyday, about anything. So nothing bottles up.”
He nodded solemnly. “I promise.”
“We should probably go to therapy… for the big things.”
“If that's what it takes.”
Lucy took a shaky breath. Her voice cracked slightly. “You can’t leave me again, Tim. Not like that. Not without warning, or a conversation, or… anything. If things get hard, we work through them. Together. I need to know you’ll do that.”
He saw the tension building in her—fear bubbling up, grief clawing its way in—and reached for her gently. His hands cupped her face, steadying her.
“I hear you,” he said. “And I mean it. I won’t run again.”
Softly, a smile ghosted across his lips. “So… yes or no?”
Lucy blinked, eyes wide, heart racing. Then she nodded.
“Yes.”