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2003
Giant military trucks filled the streets of South Park. One by one, each house on the street was evacuated, and people were loaded into the huge tanks on their way to god knows where.
His friends all called him crazy. Never one for big cities and large groups of people, it was no surprise that immediately after college, Craig returned home after earning his degree. He had gotten a remote job with NASA and was living the dream, not having to leave his house or deal with anyone. Last he heard, Denver had just gotten bombed.
Craig was pretty much alone anyway. His sister lived in New York with her husband and kid, and his mom had gone back home to Italy as soon as her kids were out of the house and had stable jobs and lives. His dad passed away when Craig was a teenager, but not before he taught Craig a few skills.
He knew how to hunt and survive alone, and he knew how to grow and preserve his own food. At some point, he had crossed the line from being prepared for an emergency to becoming a full-on doomsday prepper. It also didn’t hurt that he had a PHD in aerospace engineering, so he was pretty good at figuring out how things worked.
The whole town was being evacuated, but Craig had decided that since he was probably going to die anyway, he would rather die in his own house. Craig had installed cameras around his house, and he had monitors set up that show every single one of them in what some people might refer to as a psycho bunker. He sat there sipping his coffee, watching as military officers surrounded his house and came up to the door.
“Not today, you new world order jackboot fucks,” Craig said shaking his head and taking another sip of his coffee.
He could hear the door open above him; he listened to their heavy boots as they searched his house, looking to see if anyone was there. Not that they would find him. Craig’s house had a secret second basement that wasn’t on the floor plan, and you couldn’t see it unless you knew where to look, which was locked by a passcode only Craig knew.
“I’m in the basement, there’s nobody here. Let’s move on to the next house.” Craig heard a voice call out above him. He heard the door shut, but stayed where he was for now.
A few hours later, everyone was gone. The town of South Park was empty, and Craig was the only one left. A huge smile crept over his face—finally some peace and quiet. Craig hopped in his truck, headed into town, and immediately got to work sectioning off his part of town and stocking up on even more supplies.
South Park had been evacuated before people had time to freak out and loot all the stores, so everything was pretty well stocked. The local hardware stores had all the fence building materials he could need.
The power shut off in the middle of his first shopping trip. But it wasn’t too hard to figure out how to get it back on; it just required a little rewiring on Craig’s end, which he was more than capable of doing.
On the second trip out, he went to the grocery store and gathered all the fresh stuff he could. He would come back for the cans later, but he wanted to use and preserve everything, so nothing went to waste.
The final place he went was the liquor store. Craig had never been much of a drinker, but he was VERY into wine, and other types of alcohol could be used as disinfectants in a pinch.
The fence around his street was put up within a week. He had a few extra cameras that he picked up from the hardware store, the same model as the ones around his house. He hooked them up and placed them around the fence so he could see everything.
In addition to the cameras, Craig set up alarms and a few simple but effective traps around the perimeter of the fence to trap stray infected, small animals, or people. Being as far out as he was, Craig wasn’t worried about infected too much. But raiders were a whole other ballgame. People were already awful before the world ended, and Craig didn’t want to think about what it would be like now that there were no rules anymore.
After a few weeks, he developed a routine: he would wake up, check the cameras, eat breakfast, check the fence and his traps, and then go inside and do whatever he felt like the rest of the day.
It was a peaceful routine. Based on Craig's setup, you would never know that there was an apocalypse going on in the rest of the world. He was safe here.
2005
Out in the yard, Craig was cutting down trees to create more room for his fence. Behind the church, there were a bunch of generators, all generating electricity for his fence. It was odd to look around the town; everyone’s lawns and houses looked terrible, from peeling paint to overgrown lawns to weather damage.
Every house was like that except for Craig’s, which looked better than ever. He had put on a fresh coat of paint, kept his lawn mowed, and kept the gutters nice and clean. He even had a few flower pots on his front porch.
In the backyard, he had a large garden with vegetables and fruit trees. He also had a coop with hens, and he was breeding his guinea pigs inside his house. He had everything figured out.
Earlier that day, Craig had gotten a deer out in the woods, so he took it to his little shed to dress and butcher it, excited for his dinner that night.
His mom had taught him how to cook, and he was more thankful for that now than he ever was. She knew Craig wasn’t good at socializing and didn’t have the best attitude, so she had taught him how to cook because she knew he needed some sort of skill to make him a desirable husband.
He stood at the stove, searing his venison before removing it from the pan, deglazing, and adding some of his homegrown carrots along with a few spices. Once he was finished cooking, he plated everything and went downstairs to watch the monsters for a while.
Craig heard one of his alarms go off and turned his attention to the monitor. There was a stray infected wandering its way towards the fence. Once it got close enough, it walked through one of Craig’s tripwires, and a shot fired right at its head. The infected fell to the ground and stopped moving. Craig went back to his dinner.
2007
Craig had just returned from a supply run, gathering things to fortify his fencing, which now had an electric gate. He was currently in the basement working on a new type of trap when he suddenly heard one of his alarms go off.
Craig grabbed his shotgun and walked towards the pit where the alarm had gone off. When he got close, he saw a small-looking man with the messiest blonde hair he had ever seen and the prettiest green eyes that matched the forest that surrounded them. When he approached the pit, he heard a sharp, squeaky, panicked voice call out to him. Craig got closer to the pit and pointed his gun at the man.
“Oh god, I-I’m not infected, I swear!” The man said, putting his hands up over his head. He looked like a kicked puppy, and he was shaking so much.
“Are you armed?” Craig asked. There was a very long pause before the man finally spoke again.
“No.” He said.
“Why did it take that long to answer?” Craig
questioned, growing more suspicious by the second.
“Well, um, I thought about lying, for some reason, but then a reason didn’t come.”
“Look, I’m just trying to get to Denver.”
“Alone?” Craig said
“Well, we started with 10 of us, but I’m alone now, " the man said sadly.
“From where?” Craig asked.
“Phoenix QZ, it’s gone.” The man responded.
Craig considered this for a moment before continuing his questioning.
“Are you hurt?” Craig asked, his tone shifting to one of concern.
“No, I’m ok, just a bruise.” The man said, looking back up at Craig. He was still sitting there with his hands up, watching Craig walk away.
Craig returned a few minutes later with a ladder, a smaller handgun, and a scanner someone had left on outbreak day. After putting the ladder in the pit, Craig motioned for the blonde man to come up. When he reached the top, Craig told him to stop and held the scanner up to his neck to check if he was infected. The scanner lit up bright green, so he was okay, and Craig let him out of the pit.
“Denver’s that way, you can make it there by nightfall,” Craig said, pointing to his left.
“Please, I’m hungry. I haven’t eaten in two days, which doesn’t sound very long out loud, it feels long though.” The man said.
“I’m letting you go, so go,” Craig said.
“Ok, look, my name is Tweek.” The man said.
“Oh yeah? Well, here’s the thing, Tweek: If I feed you, then every other person you talk to is going to end up here looking for a free lunch,” Craig said.
“Please? I swear I won’t tell anyone about this place, I promise. You already know I’m bad at lying,” Tweek said.
The two stood in the meadow, Tweek waiting quietly to see what happened. He could tell Craig was thinking about something else.
Craig was watching him, Tweek’s face shining in the sun. He was smaller than Craig, but still obviously strong. Craig could see his muscular frame from under his flannel shirt. He was just so pretty.
Tweek smiled as he noticed Craig staring. In that moment, he knew he was getting his lunch.
Inside the house, Craig let Tweek shower, and he brought fresh, clean clothes and set them down on the bed in the spare bedroom. He looked kind of nervous. Craig hadn’t seen or talked to anybody else in four years, especially not someone this cute.
“I left some clothes for you on the bed,” Craig said.
“Thank you!! I’m almost done; can I have five more minutes? The hot water is so nice!” Tweek asked.
“Sure,” Craig replied. Exiting the room to get started on lunch.
Tweek sat on one end of the table, wearing a fresh green flannel of Craig’s. He was all scrubbed clean with his hair swept back nearly. He looked really good. Tweek looked around at the nice dishes, silverware, wine glasses, and perfectly white linen napkins all meticulously laid out.
Tweek got up and examined the rest of the room. There was a small cage with a few guinea pigs inside. But there were no pictures on the mantle, and he seemed alone.
The kitchen door swung open, Tweek returned to his seat, and Craig put his plate in front of him. Craig had cooked rabbit, cherry tomatoes, and sweet potato puree. Craig sat at the opposite end of the table and pulled out his bottle of wine. Tweek dug into his lunch.
“What… the fuck man” Tweek said, his eyes lighting up with joy, he had never eaten anything this good before.
“Everything tastes good when you’re starving,” Craig said, not used to getting praised for his cooking.
“I mean, yeah, but not like this, oh my god,” Tweek said, taking another bite.
Craig got up and uncorked the wine. He then walked over to Tweek and looked at the label.
“Nice, a man who knows how to pair rabbit with a Beaujolais,” Tweek said, raising his eyebrow at Craig.
“I know I don't seem like the type,” Craig said.
“No, you do,” Tweek said with a smile, before drinking his wine.
“I have more if you want,” Craig offered.
“I can’t, but believe me, I want to. Thank you so much,” Tweek said.
“You're welcome,” Craig said with an awkward smile.
“So, I guess I’ll be going then. But first, I’ve been staring at this the whole time, antique?” Tweek said, walking toward the beautiful grand piano in the parlor.
“1948,” Craig responded.
Tweek looked through the bench and pulled out a stack of sheet music before Craig could protest. Shuffling through the songs, he saw a lot of old songs and classical music.
“Yuck, these aren’t yours,” Tweek said, continuing to look through the stack of music.
“No, they were my mother's,” Craig said.
“AHA!” Tweek said, holding up “The Best of Linda Ronstadt.”
“THIS is you, oh! This one’s my favorite!” Tweek said, lifting the cover and playing the song. He had more confidence than skill and was practically tone-deaf.
“No, no, not that song,” Craig said.
“Well, I’m not a professional,” Tweek said.
“Neither am I but,” Craig trailed off. He knew he fucked up.
This piqued Tweeks' interest. He stood up and moved aside to let Craig take over.
“Show me, and then I’ll leave,” Tweek grinned.
Craig sat down and began to play. It was beautiful. He’d practiced this many times. And when he started to sing, it was glorious, beautiful, heartbreaking, perfect.
“Love will abide
Take things in stride
Sounds like good advice
But there's no one at my side
And time washes clean love's wounds unseen
That's what someone told me
But I don't know what it means
'Cause I've done everything I know
To try and make you mine
And I think I'm gonna love you
For a long, long time”
Craig finished and looked at Tweek, who was stunned. Craig had tears tracking down his face, which he quickly wiped away.
“So who's the girl? The one you’re singing about?” Tweek asked
“There is no girl,” Craig said slowly.
“I know,” Tweek said.
Tweek leaned down and kissed Craig. Craig froze before slowly rising and kissing him back. Craig looked like he had just seen god.
“What’s your name?” Tweek asked.
“Craig.”
“Go take a shower, Craig,” Tweek said, very pleased with himself.
Craig had just gotten out of the shower and entered the bedroom. Tweek was in his bed, and Craig was standing with just a towel on. Craig walked over to the bed and took a deep breath before undoing the towel.
Tweek looked up and down his body before giving an approving nod. Craig got in bed next to Tweek, who rolled over on top of him. Craig tensed up a little.
“You sure you want to do this?” Tweek asked. Craig nodded.
“Have you ever done this before?” Tweek asked again.
“Once, with a girl a long time ago. But..” Craig said kind of sheepishly.
“Oh, I know. So we’ll start off slowly with the simple things, ok?” Tweek confirmed.
“Ok,” Craig said, a little nervous.
“But before I do, I want you to know that I am not a whore, I do not have sex for lunches, even if they are really great. So if we’re going to do this, I’m going to stay for a few more days, is that ok?” Tweek said, lowering his face closer to Craig’s.
“Yes,” Craig said before giving Tweek a soft, slow kiss.
2010
The screen door of the house flung open as Tweek stormed out, and Craig followed close behind. Tweek’s hair was shorter, and Craig’s hair was getting grayer.
“Oh FUCK you!” Tweek yelled.
“Oh, would you stop?” Craig said, and stop he did. Tweek quickly stopped and turned around before ripping into Craig again.
“Do I ask for anything, EVER? This isn’t even for me, it’s for US.” Tweek retorted.
“Who cares what they look like?” Craig said,
gesturing to the unkempt lawns and the peeling paint on the houses on the street.
“I do!! This is our home, and that includes everything around us.” Tweek explained.
“Give me a fucking break,” Craig said, completely done with this conversation.
“I’m sorry I forgot, I live in THIS world and YOU live in a psycho bunker where 9/11 was an inside job, and the government are all nazis,” Tweek said, rolling his eyes.
“The government ARE all nazis!” Craig said.
“Well, yeah, now, but not then. Look, all I want is some paint and some gas for the lawnmower. I will do everything else by myself, okay? And I swear to God if you say resource management one more time, I will run through one of your tripwires,” Tweek said.
“Ok, fine, but just tell me why?” Craig relented.
“This is my street too; let me love it however I want to. Also, I’m fixing up some of the shops, not any of the stupid ones, just the wine shop, the furniture store, and the clothing boutique.” Tweek explained.
“Woah, the boutique? What are we hosting garden parties now?” Craig said.
“No, but we are going to have friends, and we are going to invite them to visit,” Tweek firmly said.
“We do not have friends, Tweek, and we never will, because there are no friends to be had.”
Tweek weighed his next words carefully because he knew they were a bit explosive.
“I’ve actually been talking to a nice woman on the radio,” Tweek said.
“YOU WHAT!” Craig exploded like a volcano.
A few weeks later, Craig and Tweek sat at a table in the backyard with their new friends Kenny and Marjorine. Lunch was laid out before all of them. Marjorine was excited about the food, but Kenny was still a little apprehensive.
Tweek was also pleased to have company, and Craig sat there next to him, eating with one hand and resting the other on his gun.
“This is amazing!” Marjorine said.
“Right?” Tweek said with a smile. He looked over at Craig and his gun.
“Could you not please?”
“I’m the same way,” Kenny said, shrugging.
“Oh, you're a paranoid schizophrenic too?” Tweek asked jokingly.
“I am not schizophrenic,” Craig insisted.
“Can I just say, gun aside, which I get by the way, this is so nice to have a civilized meal in such a beautiful place,” Marjorine said, redirecting the conversation.
“It’s been a long time. Thank you, I really mean that. Even if we don’t end up working together, I needed this.” Marjorine continued.
“We are working together. Come on, I want to show you something.” Tweek said, leading Marjorine into the house.
“No, not inside. Tweek, TWEEK,” Craig said defeatingly.
Craig and Kenny were alone. Craig glared at Kenny, who was about to take a bite out of a roll but decided to set it back down.
“I understand. If I were to invite strangers into our situation, I wouldn’t be happy about it either. But out of all the people he could have found on the radio, we are genuinely decent people just trying to get by.” Kenny said.
“Well aren’t we lucky” Craig said.
“Look, there are things we have at the QZ that you don’t have: like medicine and machine parts. We could help each other. Now, get that gun out of here.
Craig leaned back and holstered his gun. The two men start eating their food. It was a comfortable silence before Kenny gestured around him.
“So, were you a prepper or something?” Kenny asked.
“You could say that, look, maybe you're good people, or maybe you're not, but it doesn’t really matter. We are self-sufficient, and we don’t need more people complicating our lives.”
After a moment, Kenny thought about it and looked at the fence.
“That fence has another year or two to go; it’s already starting to corrode. I can get you some aluminum, and it will last you the rest of your lives,” Kenny said.
After a few hours, Kenny and Marjorine prepared to leave. Craig watched from behind, annoyed. Kenny walked up behind him and stopped.
“You know, FEDRA will never come up here, and you're protected from stray infected. But sooner or later, raiders will come. And they will get over your fence and come at night, quiet and armed.” Kenny warned.
“We’ll be fine.” Craig insisted.
The guests headed off, and for the first time since the world ended, Craig was afraid.
2013
Craig was running through the streets, almost as if he was being chased by something, but he was trying to keep up with Tweek as they jogged around their neighborhood.
“Come on, another half a mile,” Tweek said.
“I can’t,” Craig said, breathing heavily. He slowed to a stop and gently rubbed his shins.
“I have something to show you,” Tweek teased.
Tweek led Craig behind the boutique where his surprise was waiting.
“Ready?” Tweek asked.
“Yes,” Craig sighed.
Tweek removed his hands from Craig’s eyes to show him his surprise. Craig lets himself genuinely smile. Tweek turned the ground behind the boutique into a giant strawberry patch full of bright red berries hanging from their stems, the plants freckled with white and yellow flowers.
“I traded Kenny and Marj one of your guns for a pack of seeds. Tweek explained.
“Which gun?” Craig asked.
“Just a little one.”
The two boys sat down together. They both picked a berry and bit into it, the sweet flavor exploding over their tongues. They both smiled, and Craig started to giggle. He had never imagined being this happy.
“I’m sorry,” Craig said.
“For what?” Tweek asked
“For getting older faster than you,” Craig said sadly.
“Oh, that’s okay. I like you older. Older means we’re still here,” Tweek said, smiling, wrapping his arms around Craig and laying his head on Craig’s shoulder.
“I was never afraid before you showed up,” Craig said before kissing Tweek.
The two men got up off the ground. Craig struggled a bit, but Tweek helped him.
That night, Tweek woke up to an empty bed. He didn't think much of it until he heard a commotion outside. He looked out the window and saw a whole bunch of people outside the fence. They all had weapons.
Unlucky for them, Craig’s traps were working exactly the way they should’ve been. Flamethrowers set raiders on fire, tripwires caused shots to fire at them, and the various pits were taking care of most of them.
Craig stood in the middle of the street, a safe distance from the fence, with his rifle. He was taking out as many raiders as he could. Tweek grabbed his gun from his nightstand and went out to join him to defend their home.
Not that Craig needed much help. All the bodies fell to the ground, and there was no more shooting. Craig lowered his rifle and looked over to Tweek, smiling. You’re safe, he thought to himself.
Craig went to hug Tweek, and when he pulled away, he saw blood on Tweek’s shirt. Then he saw all the color drain from Tweek’s face, and his eyes widened with fear. Craig looked down and saw his pants and shirt soaking red. There was a small bullet hole in his hip.
Tweek helped him inside, clearing everything off the table and laying Craig down. Craig was starting to lose consciousness from the blood loss.
Tweek quickly left to get supplies. He returned with a first aid kit, whiskey, and scissors.
“Keep the gas in, the fire will kill the rest of them,” Craig said weakly.
“Yup, ok,” Tweek said as he focused on getting Craig’s pants out of the way so he could assess the damage. Before all of this, Tweek was a paramedic, so he knew quite a bit about emergency situations.
“I made a list for you, and I have copies of all the keys,” Craig said, breathing heavily.
“Mmhmm.” Tweek wasn’t listening; he was focused on cleaning the wound.”
“Call Kenny, you can’t be here alone,” Craig said.
“I’m not alone, I have you,” Tweek reminded him.
“Call Kenny, he’ll take care of you…” Craig said as he finally lost consciousness.
2023
Craig was slowly walking around his yard, watering all the plants. It took a while; he was in his 70s now. He looked over at the porch where Tweek was sitting.
“It’s getting cold,” Tweek said, adjusting the blanket on his lap, his hands shaking. Tweek looked so much older than Craig, despite them being the same age.
A few years back, a stroke had robbed him of a lot of his youth and the use of his right leg, and he still struggled with his arm, so he was in a wheelchair now. He was just happy and fortunate to have survived.
Craig wheeled him inside the art room they had set up for him. Tweek had always been artistic, but these last few years, he had really gotten into painting, although it wasn’t working very well anymore.
After a while, it was time for dinner, so they retired to the dining room. Tweek struggled with his form, but that wasn’t anything new.
“Did you take your pills?” Craig asked.
“Not yet,” Tweek said, reaching into his sweater to grab the small bag. He tried to open it before giving up and hanging the bag to Craig.
After dinner is done, they shower and get ready for bed. Craig helps Tweek up and into bed before getting in himself. The same routine they’ve been doing for years.
Craig rolled over to kiss Tweek, saying goodnight before turning the lamp off and falling asleep. Tweek shut his eyes, and when he knew Craig was sleeping, he opened them again. He was thinking about something.
When Craig woke up, he rolled over, and Tweek wasn’t beside him. Tweek was back, sitting in his wheelchair, grinning back at him. How the hell did he even manage that?
“Took most of the night, I’m exhausted,” Tweek said, laughing. Craig got up, annoyed, and went to help him back to bed.
“I’m not going to fall asleep,” Tweek said.
“Really? You always say that.” Craig said, Not in the mood to argue.
“I promise I’m going to stay up.” Tweek insisted.
“Why is that?” Craig asked, humoring him.
“Because this is my last day,” Tweek revealed.
The two men sat in the parlor to discuss. Craig was at a loss for words.
“What if we find someone who can help?” Craig said.
“Nobody’s coming, Craig. Besides, there wasn’t anything they could do to fix this before the world fell apart. I’ve made up my mind,” Tweek said softly, gesturing for Craig to come closer.
Craig tried so hard not to cry. He was scared and angry, breaking Tweek’s heart, but he had decided.
Craig scooted over to be as close as possible.
“Look I’m not going to give you that everyday was a gift from god bullshit, I’ve had a LOT of bad days, including some with you. But I’ve had more good days with you than with anyone else, so give me one more good day. Sit with me while I finish this terrible painting, then we’ll go to the boutique where I will pick us outfits, you will cook a delicious dinner, and we will get married. Then you will crush all of these up and put them into my wine, and I’ll drink it, and then you will take me to our bed, and I will fall asleep in your arms.” Tweek explained the plan for his last good day.
“I can’t,” Craig said, starting to cry.
“Do you love me?” Tweek asked.
“Of course I do,” Craig assured him.
“Then love me the way I want you to,” Tweek said with a smile. Of course, Craig will.
The two men continue with their day, Craig taking Tweek to the boutique, passing by the strawberry patch, which is now just a big mess of fruit, a wild patchwork of red and green.
Back at the house, the sun is setting, and they are sitting next to the piano. They take their rings and put them on each other's fingers. They kissed each other like it was the first time again, in the same spot they shared their first kiss. They don’t need anything more than this; it’s perfect.
In the dining room, Craig cooks the same dinner he made the first time he met Tweek. There are candles on the table and an open bottle of wine. Craig sets the plate down in front of him.
After a while, Craig poured two glasses of wine. He took the bag of crushed white pills and stirred them into one of the glasses before passing them to Tweek.
“Will ot be enough?” Tweek asked, holding the glass in his hands.
“Yeah,” Craig nodded.
Tweek lifted the glass and drank the cup dry. Craig watched him. So it’s done. Craig lifted his glasses and drank all of his wine in one go. Tweek looked at him, confused. Then he looked at the bottle, which was already open when they sat down to eat.
“Were there already pills in the bottle?” Tweek asked
“Enough to kill a horse,” Craig confessed.
“Look, this isn’t some tragic suicide, I’m old, I’m satisfied, and you were my purpose,” Craig explained.
“I should be furious, but from an objective standpoint, this is incredibly romantic,” Tweek said before reaching his hand out.
“Take me to bed,” Tweek asked.
Craig took Tweek’s hand and wheeled Tweek out of the room. They walk down the hall to their bedroom and shut the door, going to bed to spend their last moments together.