Work Text:
Shining Star, you're my Sirius
Shooting star on radio star
Time is running out
But you're my lucky strike
Hansol watches as Seungkwan rubs his fingertips against his ear. One hand, busy scrolling through instagram. They're seated in the studio, comfortable and close. Seungkwan says something, that Hansol doesn't hear. He's busy staring at Seungkwan's side profile.
Seungkwan pouts, then turns slightly towards him, his hands stop messaging his earlobe. “You're not paying attention.” He huffs, “How's this?” Seungkwan asks, showing him a reel of a cat dancing to rock with you.
Hansol looks at Seungkwan, a helplessly fond smile overtakes his face, “Cute.” he mutters.
“You're not paying attention.” Seungkwan whines.
At that Vernon shifts, angling himself to turn towards Seungkwan. “I am paying attention.” he whispers softly, like it's a secret to be held. Their secret.
Seungkwan blinks, surprised at the sudden sincerity. His face burns, “Yah Chwe Hansol do you want to die?”
Hansol chuckles lightly, “why did you stop?”
Seungkwan tilts his head, “What did I stop?” He shifts, knees bumping with Hansol's. He places a hand on top of Hansol's knee, making circles with his index.
“Playing with my ear.” Hansol replies, easy, calm, collected. All of which Seungkwan was not as soon as Hansol said these words.
Seungkwan scoffs, “For someone who told me to stop touching your ears, you do like it a lot.” He continues to play with his earlobe, folding it between his fingers.
“I didn't mean it.” Hansol breaths. “I said it just to get your heart rate up.” He admits, easy. As if he knows Seungkwan's heart. And that's the thing, isn't it? He does know Seungkwan's heart.
Seungkwan falters, his fingers stop tracing circles. Just a moment, a second that might go unnoticed. But it doesn't. Not when Hansol is around. Nothing he does gets unnoticed when Hansol is with him.
“I still went home though. Did it really work?” Seungkwan teases, hoping to ease the tension that had built up without him realising.
Hansol smiles, that lopsided grin taking over his face that is reserved for moments like these. Where they're alone. Without anyone around, no people, no cameras. Just them. Just Seungkwan and Hansol.
“Maybe not.” he shakes his head, “But at least we went home together.”
It's things like these that Seungkwan can't decipher. Things like this are said when they're alone. Like he means more to Hansol than he thinks he does. Like…. Maybe Hansol feels as deeply as he feels for him. But this is just a dream. A dream enclosed and limited to the small space they share on the couch. Once they're out, they'll just be orbiting each other, close but not quite.
His eyes fall to Hansol's ear. His ear tattoo to be specific. He had never asked Hansol why he got it. Why did he get it at a place only the both of them have access to? Was it intentional or was it just because it looked good? Seungkwan never asked all these questions. Even though they quite literally plagued his mind ever since he saw the pretty stardust tattoo inked on Hansol's ear. Like it belonged there.
Before he knows or realises, his mouth moves on his own, words spilling out into a statement rather than a question. “You never told me why you got this tattoo”
Hansol glances at his hand, still massaging his earlobe. Then he smiles, ever so gently. Eyes fond and… and loving. Seungkwan sucks in a sharp breath. The intensity and softness with which Hansol was looking at him made him breathless.
“Well, for starters it was pretty.” Hansol replies, after what felt like too long of an eye contact.
Seungkwan rolls his eyes, then hits his shoulder gently. “I know that!” He continues, faltering a bit, “But… but why this place?”
Hansol's eyes shoot up in surprise. Seungkwan has an apology on his lips, ready to stumble out for asking a question that might be too invasive. In moments like these, the lines between what was okay and what was not blurred a lot. Whether it was due to how close they were or how Hansol smiles at him, he's not sure. Either of those two, or probably and most likely both.
Hansol speaks before Seungkwan can apologize, his gears stop turning. “Don't say sorry.”
Hansol looks intense. Seungkwan chuckles. Hansol always got angry when he apologized. Scolded him and nagged him due to his habit. It took a lot of effort from him and even more so from Hansol to let go of that habit. He raises his hands in fake surrender. Hansol smiles.
“You want to know why I got this tattoo on my ear?” Hansol asks, and he could only nod. It was getting harder to form a sentence.
Hansol slowly detangles himself from Seungkwan. Seungkwan wants to whine at the loss of Hansol's warm presence but he decides against it. Be patient. He reminds himself. Hansol takes his phone out, scrolls through some folders. Click. Click. Click.
It's an audio, probably a song. He looks at Hansol who only ducks his head shyly.
“Is this your solo song for the album?” He asks, because Hansol was currently blushing? Yeah, he really was. He isn't seeing things. Chwe Hansol was blushing because he's letting him hear a new song?
“Yeah. Here.” Hansol nods once, eyes still not meeting Seungkwan's. He presses play. A soft jazz sound opens the track. Then, Hansol's voice comes through. Oh wow. Seungkwan thinks he probably fell in love all over again.
He listens to it silently until the end, bobbing his head along to the rhythm. He's pretty sure he gasped in shock and awe a few times in between too. But that's not relevant at the moment, so he focuses on Hansol again.
“Wow Hansol this is so good. I love it so much.” He praises him. He's pretty sure his eyes are twinkling.
“You like it?” Hansol asks once again, to be sure or what he doesn't know.
“Of course you idiot.” He says, pinching Hansol's cheeks again.
“It's called shining star.” Hansol finally says, and that makes Seungkwan stop poking his cheeks. He looks back at him, shock and realization taking over his face.
A memory from two years ago crosses his mind.
It was a tough time. Seungkwan has been feeling like he's under water with no way to escape. This is the best way he could describe this feeling. This probably worsened more after he saw some comments about his appearance. Truly, it has been so long since he's in the industry and he is used to it. Hell, some people have had the audacity to call Jeonghan or Mingyu ugly. He doesn't get it. The main point was, he felt like doing nothing. Especially eating. It was one of those days.
So he's in the practice room, alone. He came here to try and clear his mind but also to…well practice. He's currently taking a break. His body feels like breaking too. The door swings open, and he flinches.
“Oh.” the person says, barely reacting. “It's you Seungkwan-ah.”
“Hansol?” Seungkwan questions, “What are you doing here?”
Hansol is carrying a take out. He keeps them down, near Seungkwan and sits in front of him.
“I was in the studio.” he replies, taking out the food. “Let's eat together.”
Seungkwan shakes his head, “No I can't eat right now. But you go ahead.”
Hansol frowns, “Did you eat already?” A simple question. Very simple. Except it's not. He says no.
Hansol keeps the food to one side, “What happened?” He asks, soft, calm and gentle. Home.
Seungkwan hesitates but eventually lets his heart take control. He spills his heart out to Hansol. Hansol, who listens patiently. Hansol, who makes sure you know he understands. Hansol, who he loves. He falters.
Hansol notices, because of course he does. “Seungkwan-ah can I tell you something?”
Seungkwan gestures a go ahead.
“I think of you as a star. A big, bright star that illuminates everyone around it. You have your own light, and you make everyone glow. You make me glow. Seungkwan, to me, you are a shining star. Brighter than any known star in the universe.” Hansol holds his hands and smiles.
He smiles right back and mutters, “Shining star”
He comes back from his reverie.
“Hansol did you?” he asks, breathless. This cannot be.
“Yes I did.” Hansol agrees simply, not hesitating. Instead, he's sure and confident. Like he knows this is where they belong.
“This little beauty here” he points to his tattoo. “This song.” he points to his phone. “It's all for you.”
Seungkwan feels like crying. All this time he spent thinking Hansol does not want him like that, Hansol was keeping parts of him with himself. He made a song for him and got a tattoo for him and…. Oh God he loves Hansol.
He says so out loud, “You know I love you right?”
Hansol laughs and nods. Seungkwan raises his eyebrows, warning him, you better say it back.
So Hansol does.
“I love you too.”