Chapter Text
Alastor was going to kill someone. Few of Hell's denizens truly earned his ire, most simply wandered into his path when he was particularly bored or when he felt inclined to help out a soul in need (for a price obviously, just because he ate his victims didn't mean it was a free lunch). He committed many atrocities, for both work and pleasure but this instance was personal. Currently he stood at about half his usual height and possessed probably not even one tenth of his usual power. The cause of this injustice would be beging for death by the time he was through with them.
Lucifer howled with laughter, beating his fist against the floor of the hotel's foyer and wiping tears of mirth from his eyes as he tried and failed to regain control of himself. Anytime he came close he'd look up and see Alastor's child form drowning inside his suddenly oversized suit and break down into fits of laughter all over again. Even before this transformation Alastor had been entertaining plots to usurp the king of Hell, but now he mentally crossed off any plan where Lucifer lived to wallow in shame after. However, until he regained the power Lucifer had inadvertently caused him to lose all he could do was wait and hope the king might laugh himself to death. There was precedent and such a shameful end would be fitting for the clown of a king before him. Unfortunately the laughing had been going on for close to ten minutes and with no indication it would turn fatal any time soon.
Finally, he heard footsteps coming from the stairs behind them. His ears flicked towards the Charlie's voice calling out, "Dad? Is everything okay? It's been noisy for a bit and we thought we heard something-" Charlie cut off as she and Vaggie stopped at the banister overlooking the lobby and took in the scene below.
Lucifer finally managed to compose himself enough to stand up (at a height taller than Alastor he noted with irritation) and called up to his daughter through his laughter, "Charlie! Sweetie, look what this idiot managed to do to himself."
Charlie ran down the stairs, nearly tripping over the last few steps in her rush. She regained her balance but not her composure as she knelt in front of Alastor fretting. "Oh my gosh, oh my gosh. Are you okay Alastor? Is he okay? What happened? Is he hurt? Are you hurt?" She continued on with her panicked babbling, switching between addressing Alastor and her father. Lucifer continued to be useless as he broke into another fit of giggles. Charlie momentarily forgot her panic to chide her father, and Alastor decided he'd had quite enough of these theatrics.
"It's quite alright my dear." He was appalled to hear his voice quite a bit higher in pitch and frustrated the static filter he liked to affect didn't manifest. Apparently his strength was even less than he'd realized if he couldn't even manage that party trick. He continued on, "Your father here lost control of his magic and this," he gestured at himself, "was the result. As soon as he stops making a fool of himself and finds his composure I'm sure everything will return to business as usual."
Alastor's gibe made Lucifer's laughter finally cut off so he could reply, pointing an accusatory finger at Alastor, "Hey! That's not what happened at all. Your bellhop thought it would be funny to pop up outta nowhere and made me drop some extremely unstable magical artifacts." That was technically true, but it wasn't Alastor's fault. The king of Hell should be able to withstand little surprises without startling like an alley cat. Besides, how was he supposed to when the man was carrying something of actual value or power, especially when the appearance of the supposed 'artifacts' was taken into consideration?
Charlie and Vaggie both looked over to the spilled contents of the box Lucifer had been carrying. Multiple rubber ducks were scattered across the floor, each uniquely decorated. Charlie groaned and began to pick up the ducks, placing them into the box. "Dad, I thought you said you weren't going to make these anymore."
Lucifer sniffed, "I don't remember saying anything of the sort."
"You agreed to not make anymore enchanted 'doo-dads or knick-knacks' after losing a whole case of cursed ones, remember?"
"Oh right that." He started to help his daughter pick up the ducks, casually tossing them into the box. "Well these aren't enchanted, they're one time use consumable spells. Completely different. Anytime someone with a knife and a farm animal begs for a favor I just toss one of these babies through and it's a done deal. Bam , fire and brimstone. Wham, eternal youth. Wa-pow, infinite wealth." He emphasized each example by tossing a duck into the box. "Saves me the trouble of showing up in person for the boring calls."
Vaggie, ever the practical one despite he many faults, turned the conversation back to the most pressing matter. "What the hell kind of duck did you hit Alastor with?"
Lucifer had puffed up with pride as he described his creations, The question and everyone's expectant gazes made him deflate. "Ha, well, I mean, its not like I aimed the things, they sorta just went flying. Were lucky it was only this guy down here so no one important got hit." Alastor felt his very strained smile twitch. Lucifer examined Alastor. "Most definitely some kind of eternal youth, but it got mixed with something else. Maybe two somethings... possibly three" He tried to poke at Alastor but Alastor slapped his hand away. Rather than his hand it was his jacket sleeve that bat Lucifer away but the point was made. Lucifer backed away, looking disgusted as he realized how close he'd gotten to Alastor while scrutinizing.
Charlie was not nearly as okay with the situation as her father, pulling at her hair and just holding herself back from yelling. "Dad! Please tell me you can fix this. We can't leave Alastor like this."
Lucifer picked up his box of ducks. "Why not? He's way less ugly like this, and probably less annoying too. Not gonna be popping outta anymore shadows anytime soon I bet." He gave Alastor a smug grin and laughed, looking for others to join in. No one did. He sighed, "Yes, I can fix it. It's gonna take some time to unravel but once I figure out which spells it all was it should be easy enough."
He started walking away and Charlie called after him, "Dad? Where are you going?"
"I've got to organize. The spells on him are too tangled so I need to figure out what's missing from my stock and work backwards from there. Might take a bit but I'm sure we'll get there eventually."
Charlie looked between Alastor's small child form, her father's retreating back, and Vaggie. Vaggie nodded and she ran after Lucifer. "I'll help you, two heads are better than one after all right?" Lucifer was ecstatic and gushed about daddy-daughter bonding time as their voices faded down the hall.
Vaggie sighed heavily and looked down at Alastor. He hadn't moved, trapped by his oversized suit threatening to fall off as soon as he took a single step. "I guess we better get you some new duds, huh."
Alastor answered, trying and failing to place the static affect back over his voice, "Yes I suppose we must."
The process of getting Alastor new clothing was simple, despite his sudden lack of power not allowing him to conjure a new outfit. He categorically refused to follow after Lucifer and beg for the halfwit or Charlie to conjure something for him, claiming he didn't want to distract the pair from their work. Vaggie clearly saw through the lie but didn't call it out. Likely because she agreed it would distract the pair and she didn't want to be stuck watching Alastor for longer than necessary. Instead she helped him adjust his clothing into something barely functional and move to the couch. She then located a tape measure left over from the rebuilding efforts and took his measurements. Once that was done she tapped at her phone for a few minutes and sat down on a chair next to Alastor's couch.
They ignored each other and their situation until something knocked at the door and she got up to accept a package from the delivery demon outside. She dropped it into his lap. "I assume you can take care of this part yourself. I don't know where you get your shoes but this should at least take care of the clothes problem for now. We'll order more if we need to. It's from the same demons who make Charlie's suits so don't even try to pretend there are any quality issues."
"If it's good enough for the princess of Hell it's quite good enough for me." That wasn't true. Charlie had the royal wallet to foot the bill for whatever impulse struck her fancy but her taste was abysmal. Fortunately Alastor was familiar with her tailor and while the man wasn't his first choice, his skill was more than acceptable. The lobby restroom was closer than his own rooms so he made the short walk there without tripping over his cuffed pant legs.
The moment the door shut and locked he finally let his frustration manifest, grumbling and letting his ears lay back against his head. The new clothes were easy to put on, they were basically a resized version of his usual attire sans suit jacket. He felt under dressed without the it but Vaggie had at least remembered to include a bow tie in the outfit so Alastor didn't appear as a complete slob. Once he'd finished changing he used one the mirrors set up for demons Nifty's height to check his reflection.
The sight was both better and worse than he expected. Some part of him had hoped he'd just become a resized version of himself, the exact same but closer in height to the imps scurrying about everywhere. But no, he was most definitely a child. The proportion of his limbs were slightly shorter and his face just a touch rounder. He was at least still clearly the radio demon, the ears, antlers, and bright red hair all unmistakable traits.
The changes to his magic were far more drastic. He used the moment of privacy to test his limits and barely managed to make his facial features glow. Pushing the absolute limits of his power he managed to store his adult clothing into his void of dimensional space before he was shaking with exhaustion. His claws at least were still knife sharp. He'd leaned against the wall while catching his breath and when he'd clenched the hand into a fist he'd had no issue gouging the tile. Lucifer's buffoonery had well and truly fucked him over. If this wasn't resolved soon he'd have to start looking into finding a solution on his own.
He returned to the lobby to see Vaggie scrolling on her phone as she waited for him. She looked up when he entered, "You sure took your time."
"True quality cannot rushed my dear."
She made a noise to express her doubt and Alastor kept his smile perfectly affixed on his face. She tucked her phone away and said, "Alright, I actually have work to do so, especially since Charlie is gonna be busy helping her dad fix this," she gestured at Alastor as if he'd forgotten his predicament in the last four seconds, "and I'll probably have to pick up your slack as well unless you were planning to keep working despite looking like you're eight years old."
"My dear, this may be Hell but even we still have to hold ourselves to a certain standards. Think of how unseemly it would be for the hotel if a potential guest saw a child doing the labor of an adult."
"Wow, it's so nice to see someone so concerned with child labor, especially considering how rare and uncommon it was when you kicked the bucket but sure, whatever. Try not to lag behind." She turned to go and before Alastor could protest the idea of playing tag-a-long all day Husker showed up.
He yelled as he descended the stairs into the lobby, "Alastor, you down here? Nifty's crawling around the vents and refuses to come out. She's keeps whispering creepy shit every time someone walks past one and it's creeping me out."
Vaggie grabbed Husk and practically dragged him to his usual position behind the bar. "Husk, perfect timing."
"What the- does personal space mean nothing to you? Besides I thought you didn't want me behind the bar until after lunch."
"Change of plans. Today you're on baby-sitting duty."
"Baby-what duty? I know you know Nif ain't a kid. Did some brat wander in here or something?" Husk finally noticed Alastor standing near the couches and voice completely deadpan asked, "What the fuck is that?"
"That is your boss after Lucifer's magic turned him into a powerless brat. Your job is to watch him and make sure nothing happens before we fix this." A scrabbling sound in the walls followed my maniacal laughing drew her attention before the noise retreated further into the hotel. She sighed and then pointed at two of them. "Both of you stay here and don't do anything stupid." She ran off after Nifty, yelling into vent coverings for her to come out.
Alastor hopped up onto a bar stool and made himself comfortable. Husk stared at him, nonplussed. Tapping the bar Alastor said, "I think a few fingers of whiskey are in order."
"You, uh, sure that's a good idea? Given your... condition."
Alastor laughed and answered, "Pour the damn drink Husk."
Husk opened his mouth to protest further, but instead he shut it and poured Alastor a generous amount of cheap whiskey before moving to the opposite corner of the bar to chug from the bottle himself. Alastor downed his own drink. To his horror his child's body could not handle the burn of the strong alcohol and he nearly choked coughing up the drink. He eventually got control of himself, no thanks to Husker. Wiping what he'd coughed out off his face he slammed his glass against the bar. "Another." Husk hesitated, than poured the drink. Alastor braced himself to swallow the next glass and hoped this useless new body would at least have a constitution that would allow him to forget this nightmare of a situation all the sooner, and drank.