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Days have been long with tight schedules and ungodly working hours, you name it, and that's affecting Sungho's mood it may not seem like it, but once you see it, it doesn’t go away.
Ever since becoming a trainee and the oldest member, Sungho has been used to doing things on his own, and that includes taking care of himself in any situation; he hates the idea of asking for help or asking what happened to him when he simply doesn't know how to feel. It isn't like he hates to feel things; he feels like asking for help will only bother or weigh down the other party.
You see, he, at times being the ‘reliable older brother’ in the group, isn't always easy. Sungho is happy to always help and offer his shoulder to lean but of course, there are days when everything seems like it will explode in a split second.
“Hey, need to catch some breath? Han River, let's go?” Dongmin initiates after Sungho comes back from break, but the thought of going to that place in this state would only make things harder. He declined the offer and just sat on the corner while catching his breath. His eyes tell and scream for help, but his lips go upwards, trying to conceal everything.
“Pretty, want some food? I could get you some. The kids and I wanna order some pizza, join us?” Jaehyun offered, his gaze met Sungho’s, full of love and adoration as always. Which again, Sungho declined, he said he only needed some water, and that's it. With that, Jaehyun leaves Sungho with a pat on the head.
“You know you’re really bad at lying, right?” Sanghyuk straight to his point, after waiting for Jaehyun and the rest go to the cafeteria. Sanghyuk’s straight point didn't surprise Sungho; he just didn't expect it to be this... blatant?
“I Uh- I don't know, I feel everything and nothing but something all at once. Just need some sleep and everything's gonna be alright, no need to worry!” Sungho yet again tried to smile as wide as he could, but his eyes spoke, and Sanghyuk noticed it all.
Unimpressed, the younger leaves Sungho for a bit and gets him a cold drink and ice cream. “Eat.” he said, “You wanna be fed?” Sungho panically shook his head.
Sanghyuk stays there by his side, saying nothing, just co-existing, waiting for the rest to come back. Sungho put his head on Sanghyuk's shoulder, trying to catch his pace and breathe and what the fuck just happened to himself.
Without Sungho knowing, Sanghyuk asked the managers to end the schedule earlier, he's sure that if they stayed any longer would do more harm than good for everyone's mood and well-being, matter fact, they've spent at least 10 hours working, so it kinda also works to the managers.
All six of them arrived at their dorm with Sungho on the higher floor, he kinda had to walk a bit further than he used to which made his mood even worse. He tried to hold back his sniffles and tears. His body felt like tearing itself inside-out, his head was spinning from how noisy it was, and all the stress that had been piling up lately with the comeback and promotion, sooner or later, would punch his guts. So he went straight to his room, didn't say a thing.
Warm water cascading over the tired body like a soothing balm, warmth enveloped him, releasing the accumulated tension. Each pour felt like a massage for his body, coaxing away the stress and exhaustion. He let a contented sigh of relief.
Sungho’s mind began to drift, relax a bit, and he felt like this was what he needed, until something shifted again, he felt the emptiness come back even stronger. He thinked -overthink- about his stage performance, Onedoor’s reaction, and everything ever existed all at once, dragging him yet again into a void full of confusion.
‘Was I ever good enough?’ ‘Have I shown my best?’ ‘Was all that compliment there just for the show?’ ‘Do I deserve all this?’
Sungho quickly finished his once relaxing shower with tears streaming down his face, just to be surprised by Jaehyun’s presence in his room, making his bed nice and fluffy just how he liked it. The younger flinched a bit, and without saying a word, he smiled and hugged Sungho’s tired body tighter than usual.
“It's okay if you're tired, it's not your fault, everything will be fine.” Jaehyun hugs Sungho even tighter, making sure the older feels his love.
He didn't stop there, he took care of Sungho, got him his clothes, even choosing the underwear. The usual Sungho would pinch Jaehyun real hard, it turned red, but this Sungho? He just smiled and waited to be clothed by Jaehyun.
“You did a wonderful job on removing your makeup, gorgeous.” Sarcasticaly the younger tell, when Sungho tries to grab his cotton pad, Jaehyun pulled him down make him just sit and wait. The younger got a bunch of cotton pads to wipe Sungho's make up clean, which baffled Sungho in the funniest way, the owner never really complained about Jaehyun using his stuff it bothered him at times when the younger doesn't clean it up.
“Don’t forget to clean this up or I'll chop you in half and serve you as breakfast tomorrow morning.” Sungho finally saying a word. Jaehyun laughed it off and nodded.
“Everything for my majesty, and I always serve so you don't have to serve me. We can serve together, you know,” Jaehyun jokingly responded, which granted him a fairly medium punch to his left shoulder.
“Don’t bite the hand that feeds you.” Jaehyun said.
“You didn't?!” Jaehyun only laughed at Sungho's angry face, the younger thinks Sungho's grumpy expression is the cutest thing in the world, at times he teases Sungho for the fun of it but not now, his majesty needs some proper love and care.
“Now the makeup done, time to do your skin care!” Jaehyun said with full excitement, it weirdly makes Sungho also feel the excitement.
Jaehyun didn’t leave which confuse Sungho. ”You wanna sleep here? I don’t think it’s the best idea tho” Sungho warns him “Nah, not my turn to sleep with you but I do have one more job.”
“Do your skin and I'll do your hair.” He said.
“Jae, you're doing too much. I could do all this myself.” Sungho gets a bit annoyed? Sad? Happy? The feelings from earlier still linger, so he doesn't really know how to feel.
“I know” He replied as he grabbed hair dryer and hair vitamins. Sungho looked at Jaehyun in disbelief because he never really tells Jaehyun what and how to use it, the guy just magically knows how to do stuff.
“Please proceed with your skin care, my majesty” A makeshift royal accent from the younger as he patted Sungho's damp hair with towel. “Stop calling me that” He replied. “Don't feel like it” Jaehyun teased, using the same tone. He stole a little peck from Sungho's lips just to tease the older bit more.
Sungho gives Jaehyun an unimpressed looks, but oh well this is Jaehyun we're talking, it will be more concerning if he didn't do such. And after he's done with his nightly routine, Jaehyun go back to his room before that he hugs Sungho more more time assuring he's not alone and will always happy to take care of Sungho.
After Jaehyun left, Sungho lay on his bed, getting better but still could sense the void waiting for its time to bite again.
Until a soft knock on his door echoed.
“Come in” Sungho said. “Don’t really need your permission but cool, I guess.” Known Sungho the longest inside-out, makes Sanghyuk understand what this ball of sunshine feels like. His sunshine’s rays shine dimmer tonight and he gotta fix that.
“Sungho, c’mere, take this. I gotta light some candle, wait in the living room a bit please, Woonhak is waiting for you on the couch so go there before that kid cry. Thank you.” Sanghyuk give Sungho some bread along with dragging Sungho out of his room and sitted him on the couch with their youngest.
As Sungho chatted with Woonhak in the living room, Sanghyuk puts a night lamp and light a lavender scented-candle so Sungho could sleep easily later on. Why he pulled Sungho out you may asked? Well Sungho hates a strong smells espesically smoke smells.
What Sanghyuk do is he will light the candle for at least 30 minutes and let the candle coax Sungho’s room with its scent, after that 30 minutes, he will put the candle out letting the smoke scent to rgo away leaving only its relaxing lavender scent. Not the most practical thing to do but for Sungho, Sanghyuk will do it all.
“Got some more chamomile tea, want some? I made too much, gotta really try to manage all these. I’ll get you some.” Sanghyuk done with lighting the candle and offer -forcing- Sungho to drink the “Excess” tea.
“I can help!” Sungho offer, this is what actually most worrying about Sungho, even if his body will detouriate in a minute as long as he can help then he will ever so willingly.
“My majesty, I suggest you not go there and let your soul enjoy this delightful banquet please!” Woonhak exclaimed using the same makeshift royally accent as Jaehyun
“What’s with the accent but also listen to that kid and stop being so wasteful.” Sanghyuk’s words sound like a jab but it’s just his words of saying ‘Don’t tire yourself even more.’
Sungho smiled and gulp his tea, his face getting brighter and brighter. They have a small talk, a small debrief on today’s agenda as the convo went on Sungho got less and less tense his body start to loosen up and looking at it Sanghyuk smiled and patted Sungho's head while still trying to find things to say. He might not be the best speaker but for Sungho, he would open a tedtalk.
Woonhak on the other hand may not be the best at solving stuff but he sure is the best at noticing everything, at times it scares everyone on how fast this guy could sense something or someone had been off, just like earlier when the other even Dongmin haven’t notice how drained Sungho had been, Woonhak being the first to catch Sungho tired body and drag the Virgo outta the practice room, nuzzling into him and handing bottle of corn tea. It's not much, at least according to the youngest.
Woonhak without missing a beat, bear hug Sungho so tight the older could barely breathe.
“You're getting bigger, you know?” ”Kinda aware of that, but I think it works in my biggest interest, I gotta give you the warmest hug.” That small guy had turned into a cute gentlemen.
After finishing their tea and bread, Sanghyuk went to Sungho's room, taking out the candle and letting the owner smell the room, Sungho likes it. Letting the Virgo in, Sanghyuk plant a kiss on the latter’s forehead and cheeks.
Woonhak followed and hugged Sungho, this time stealing a peck on the older’s lips, giggling as he run out of embarassment
“Dongmin and Donghyun are on their way, so don’t sleep or face the consequences. Enjoy your night, love!” Riwoo exclaimed closing Sungho’s door.
To be fair he felt at least 80% better and still don’t feel any sleepiness creeping anytime soon so he scrolled trough his phone, interacting with Onedoor, it somehow soothes him a little knowing he’s loved by so many people around the world but also making him felt guilty for all the love and support he got.
“And that’s the end of today’s menpa! Now, put your phone away.” Dongmin barges in with ramyeon pot and snack bags, a bit surprise with the sudden scent attack ‘Must be Sanghyuk’ he thought. The now-inside-Sungho’s room-Dongmin sits and pulls out a small table and staring at the older with a little smile across his face. The classic would-do-the-unthinkable Dongminn.
The red-haired ran out to buy snacks and dessert at 3 A.M also cooked 2 packets of ramyeon so Sungho could feel better.
“Too full, don’t wanna eat more.” And so Dongmin fed Sungho. The younger know Sungho loves to be fed, his independent demeanor won't fool Dongmin into how he missed being the youngest of the family.
“Don’t ask, don’t care. Eat. I’ve cooked you something with my heart.” Making him down some more food in the dawn of day. Dongmin didn’t just feed Sungho, he also reassured and patted the older’s head and back time to time, humming songs Sungho likes.
“Don’t feel guilty, you’ve worked hard. I bought some boba tea, you can drink it later on. There’s also cheesecake and some banana cake if you want." Dongmin said in one breath.
“Where have you been?” Sungho asked
“Places.” Dongmin replied, shrugging his shoulder like he didn’t just buy a whole minimarket.
As Sungho wants to feed himself, Dongmin leave the room for a second and come back with some cleaning tools. He walks around Sungho’s room, tidying it up, sweeps it a bit and re-adjust some misplaced stuff, which again confuses Sungho.
“How you know to place what to where?” He asked with lips reddened from the ramyeon sauce.
“I just know. Not my business, I know, but it helps at times like this. Plus, you don’t need to worry for at least half day about your room being cluttered or whatever” Dongmin explained as he cleaned the whole room even the nooks and crannies.
When Sungho done with his food Dongmin took the pot and give the older some water, they talked a bit about anything other than work.
Food gone, water gone, time for some serenade. This is a so-called ritual between them, if one of the two felt under the weather, the other would sing to the latter. Dongmin, being the person that he is he made a lullaby for Sungho, sings it every time Sungho feels like the world is too heavy to carry.
The red-haired tucked Sungho to bed and without a surprise the lullaby made Sungho’s eyes heavier by each verse. Dongmin try to leave the room as quiet as he could but failed when he stumped his pinky toes to Sungho’s desk. Waking the older.
“Fucking hell! No, pumpkin, go back to sleep please- Argh!” The red-haired cursed but tried to stay calm though failed miserably.
“Huh- Wha-? Oh god Dongmin!” The once half asleep Sungho jumped from his bed and get his aid box, treating the younger wound though Dongmin refuse, Sungho insisted.
“I think you’re good to go. Or do you wanna sleep here? No pressure to you, don’t know about your toe tho” Sungho tries to lighten the mood, now Dongmin turn to refuse, he doesn’t hate the idea, it’s just a bit much embarrassing.
“No need to hold your ego and pride with me, big guy.” Sungho second attempt.
“I’m not, plus it hurt and I don’t wanna bother you, it’s fine, I promise.” Dongmin firmly as he opened the door. Planting kiss on Sungho’s lips, not for long, his pinky begin didn’t throb.
“See you later, Pumpkin.” As Dongmin disappears behind his room’s door.
Donghyun entered Sungho room when the owner was just about to close his door. He walk straight to Sungho’s bed, beaming with smile, lay down and tapped the space beside him, asking Sungho to sleep on his arms.
“I know you’ve been pampered by the others, now, it’s my time to shine!” Donghyun’s grin bloom, excitedly waiting for Sungho to cuddle with him. As Sungho nestled Donghyun’s arms adjusting himself, Donghyun couldn’t help but squeak at how their body fits each others.
When Sungho place his back on Donghyun’s chest, the younger enveloped Sungho in a hug, he nuzzled his nose on Sugho’s hair sniffing and caressing the older, creating cozy cocoon. Donghyun's hand moved gently, rubbing and squeezing the older’s body, soothing the ache and knots. His hand occasionally strayed around rubbing and patting Sungho's sculptured stomach.
“You’re so cheesy, you know?” Sungho chuckled a bit at how silly Donghyun act, the blondie might try to one up the other, Donghyun doesn’t say it but Sungho can feel it.
“I’m just being me!” Donghyun sulked a little.
“You are and I really like it! Thank you, Prince!” Sungho turn his head a little and give Donghyun a sweet kiss. They talk a little about Donghyun’s earlier encounter with an orange cat which he says resembles Sungho a lot and also he encountered some people doing the ‘cat-shadow’ trend asking Sungho to do it too.
“You should try it” Donghyun said as he keep nuzzling himself into Sungho.
“I’m not flexible enough, but maybe I can try in one condition.” Sungho gleefully replied.
“What condition?” Donghyun replied “You do the bunny version!” Sungho excitedly explain “You’re wish is my command, my majesty.” Donghyun speak as he giggle a bit.
“You guys should stop following everything Jaehyun did.” Sungho sulked.
“But you are my majesty, no?” Donghyun asked.
Sungho sigh a little and turned his body around, changing his position now resting his head on Donghyun's chest, the younger’s heartbeat calms him so much he could sleep to it.
“You wanna sleep now?” Donghyun spoke softly.
“Uhm, maybe, do you wanna tell me bedtime story?” Sungho asked.
“So you know earlier this week when we just got back from broadcast, right? Jaehyun was exhausted, he slept on the couch, then I noticed he kept fidgeting, and I found out my aquarium light was so bright. I asked him about it, then he said ‘Yea, it kinda bothers me’ then I tone it down but then I realized it wasn’t as aesthetic looking as usual, so I picked Jaehyun up and tucked him to bed” Donghyun explain excitedly, he also imitated Jaehyun for his response which Sungho thinks funny.
“Did you turns it up again? Or sleepy?” Sungho ask curiously, remembering Donghyun was already worn out that day. “I turn it up then go to sleep” Donghyun proudly replied.
Now this is Sungho and Donghyun’s routine ever since they separate dorm floor, Donghyun talks about his day and fishies like how his Rummy was doing or his Corydoras can do tricks. Donghyun even said he want to adopt some more after the promotion ended.
If Sungho being honest he doesn't really undestand what Donghyun was saying but he can tell that Donghyun is actually and utterly care about him, and don’t want him to worried about things. So Donghyun doing it his way with talking about his day and his kids.
“Can we do it tho? Isn’t your aquarium already full?” Sungho asked again.
“Then I’ll buy a second one, you know the gift I got from Soobin’s show? They gave me two of them TWO” The blonde explain making ‘two’ with his finger and wiggle Sungho around in a hug. As Donghyun tell his story with kisses and pats, Sungho felt himself dissolving into Donghyun’s arm deeper and better.
At the same time, times like this make Sungho feel he doesn’t deserve this much love but then his members never fail to remind him that he deserves it as much as the other. Time like this makes time seemed to slow down, the air filled with love and care, thickening their bond with affection and compassion.
“Just so you know I’m not good with words but I can guarantee I’ll be by your side until my last day on earth, and so does the rest, we love, care and want you to know that you can’t get arrested just from asking for help. The other might’ve said this but you have five of us, everything is gonna be alright and the world won't fall flat to your head.” Donghyun’s voice low and velvety.
“Thank you, and I love you too, Prince” Sungho replied as he was hugged tigher and drifted away to dreamland.