Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The best kind of best-friend can sometimes be found in nature.

Minho takes out the biggest and heaviest book from his dad’s book rack.

It was a dictionary and it had every word in it.

It was a lot of words, and sometimes Minho flips the pages until he lands on a new one and he reads it, trying to learn it and understand it. If he didn’t understand it, which was most times, he asked his dad who would explain it by giving him a sentence that used that word. Sometimes he would ask the meaning of a word that would make his dad confused too and they would both laugh about it.

But Minho already knew a lot of words- words he didn’t read in the dictionary, words he didn’t hear from his dad or the TV or more recently from his school.

Words his mother repeated many times to him during the few times she visited.

Careful.

Dangerous.

Risky.

Secret.

Suspicious.

Harm.

Fear.

His mother’s words ring in his head as Minho watches the boy in the woods, talking to himself as he poked around the rocks and base of trees.

Never let anyone see who you are. Never risk yourself or your father.

It’s dangerous.

Never trust anyone.

The boy hasn’t seen him yet.

He probably didn’t even sense him but Minho has seen him in his woods for a few days now.

Minho knows these woods aren’t his, but he likes to think they are. No one comes around here. Sometimes other kids from the farms and the school go to play in the woods but it’s never this far out here.

Minho likes living far from the town- it meant he was able to have more places to roam around in. And he always liked coming here because of the secret pond he found with his mother a couple of years ago when she was showing him the places she would come to with her parents. It was their secret spot, and it reminds him of his mother so he came here every time he missed her.

He used to come here a lot before, hoping his mum would be somehow be waiting for him. But she never was. He’s had two birthdays now, and she still hadn’t come other than to call him- his dad, sometimes.

So now this pond was just his. His secret pond.

But his peaceful solitary roams are disturbed by this boy who was probably around his age.

He wasn’t from school, Minho knew that much.

He was too pale to be from around their town anyway, and he looked around the woods like he’s never been here before. He was also picking up random plants and stones for some reason.

Maybe he was from the big city and they didn’t have plants like these. All of their roads were big and smooth and black, so he probably didn’t see many stones and dirt.

Minho doesn’t have friends. He knows some kids, they know him, but that’s it. Minho doesn’t have friends and it’s not because he doesn’t want friends; but he also doesn’t really want friends either.

It was a weird place to be.

But Minho wants to look at this city-boy.

When his dad told him about the grandpa in this area dying, they had gone to give their respects. He met the grandpa’s family and Minho guesses this boy is the dead grandpa’s family. Maybe grandson. 

When Minho first approaches the city-boy he spooks him a little.

As a pup, a lot of his capacity to really understand and comprehend was a bit compromised, somewhat limited to his ability to express in his shifted form.

But Minho can tell that the boy isn’t scared of him. He was spooked at first, careful, but not scared.

He talks to him at once.

He had a nice voice. Minho likes him.

The city-boy tries to approach him but Minho feels shy, mostly nervous, and he still wants to be careful even if he knows that he can somehow trust this city-boy.

The city-boy seems to understand that he doesn’t want to be close so he doesn’t try to approach him again.

He tries to ask Minho to follow him to his house but Minho already has a home so he doesn’t need another. But that was nice. If he was a stray puppy, he would like to have gone with the city-boy.

He comes back a day later but city-boy is not alone. He has another boy with him, probably his younger brother.

They’re both clearly looking for him, Minho can tell.

The city-boy calls for him, calling him puppy, and the smaller boy does the same.

Minho thinks they’re nice, but there was two of them now, and he’s more nervous. So he just watches them until they go back home.

Minho follows them for a while until he reaches the edges of the woods. The house is smaller than his, but it’s cute and nice, and he can see a grandma outside, and another man- maybe this was city-boy’s dad.

The next day he’s alone.

And he brings snacks too.

City-boy liked to talk a lot. He tells Minho everything and anything and Minho likes hearing him talk. He follows him around the woods, maintaining a little bit of distance but Minho already feels comfortable with him.

City-boy seems to understand him even if Minho can’t speak like this- he followed Minho into places he knows they’ll find cool plants he’ll like, and he always keeps a distance and never tries to chase after Minho or throw things at him.

Minho has seen how people in the town sometimes treated the stray or wild dogs- he’s heard people say they need to chase out coyotes and how in the past they used to keep traps or always carried stones to throw at them just in case. His mother told him about it too; showed him her scars from when she was chased as a young girl when she accidently came across a group of teenagers in the woods and they chased after her with sticks.

‘People will always be cruel to things they don’t understand and are afraid of,’ she told him, ‘Fear makes you do horrible cruel things- so never show yourself.’

But city-boy is not scared of him. The first time he had been shocked, but he reached out for him with no fear in his eyes. He was eager to be friends with him, Minho knows, and Minho really wants that too.

He’s never wanted to be friends with anyone else at school like this. The other kids scared him- what if they found out? What if they throw stones at him and chase him out? He has nightmares about it, running down the hallways of the school as his classmates and teachers alike scream and throw things at him and he’s unable to get out.

But city-boy was really nice- every time he found something he thought was cool he always showed Minho. And if he saw burs or thorns he always warned Minho which was nice because he once got burs on his coat and it was really annoying to take out and it poked him everywhere.

He wants to get closer to city-boy and play with him but his mother’s warning keeps coming to his mind.

And maybe she was right because after a couple of days during which it rained hard, Minho goes back to the woods near where the city-boy lived and he asks him if he’s a wolf.

Minho is suddenly scared.

How did he know?

Why did he ask him that of all things?

Worried, Minho runs away, ignoring the tasty shrimp snacks he always looked forward to eating with city-boy.

He goes back again though, still unsure what to make of it. He’s worried, but he likes spending time with city-boy, digging around the woods, looking for nice stones and small plants that city-boy really seemed to like. Minho even spooks him sometimes with some insects that he guesses aren’t in the city.

City-boy was a friend. Or at least he wants to be his friend.

He gets more paranoid when city-boy shows up with his baby brother again and a woman Minho guesses is their mother. Minho stays hidden in the low bushes, staying still and not moving at all.

‘Chan-ah,’ she says, calling for him because city-boy, or Chan, didn’t want to go back yet, still looking for Minho, ‘Let’s go back.’

He hears them talk about the vet- that was the animal doctor, as they leave. Minho knows this because there was an animal doctor in the town who checked on the different pets and all sorts of other animals around the town. All the dogs were afraid of him so Minho doesn’t like him either.

He doesn’t want to go to the vet. Besides, he wasn’t a dog.

He has to tell city-boy- he has to tell Chan.

It’s a big decision. He knows that.

He was doing everything his mother told him not to do.

But something tells Minho he can trust Chan.

So he dresses nicely, wears his favourite shirt, and heads to the woods. It takes longer to walk like this but it was annoying running around with a bag in his mouth so he’ll just have to walk longer.

He goes to where they usually met in the woods and waits there. He waits for a long time and Minho wonders if Chan wasn’t going to show up when he hears footsteps approaching. He sits up straight, eyes focused in between a cluster of some young trees through which Chan usually stepped through to appear.

A few seconds later Chan appears and-

Chan stops suddenly, staring at him with large eyes.

‘Hi.’

‘You’re late,’ Minho tells him.

‘…are you talking to me?’ Chan asks him.

‘I don’t want to go to the doctor,’ Minho tells him at once. He wonders if Chan will recognize him.

‘Are you sick?’ Chan asks, walking over slowly.

‘No. That’s why I don’t want to go,’ Minho explains more.

‘Well. That makes sense,’ Chan tells him.

‘Did you bring those shrimp chips today?’ Minho asks.

Chan frowns.

‘How do you know about my chips? Who are you?’ he demands.

‘My name is Minho. Lee Minho,’ Minho introduces himself before repeating, ‘Don’t take me to the doctor okay?’

‘But why would I take you?’ Chan asks with a little frown.

‘You brought your mother here,’ Minho explains, ‘And she said you should take me to the doctor.’

‘What?’ Chan frowns, ‘I don’t know you! I’ve never met you before!’

Chan didn’t recognize him. But Minho guesses that made sense. So he was just going to have to show him after all, otherwise he won’t believe him, and he would call that vet.

Sighing out, Minho walks away towards some thick tall hedge-bushes.

‘Wait!’ Chan calls after him. ‘Wait- Minho, come back!’

Minho takes off his shirt and shorts and puts them down on the clear flat ground, away from the taller grass that could have ticks and other insects and shifts. He makes his way out, noticing that Chan was looking around worriedly.

‘Puppy! You made it!’

Of course he can’t talk like this- even his dad didn’t always understand him but-

It’s me. I’m the puppy- I’m Minho! And I’m not sick! So don’t take me to the vet! Minho does his best to express this.

‘I’m sorry about the corn chips,’ Chan tells him instead, ‘I’ll only bring shrimp chips-?’

Frustrated, Minho goes back to the bushes and shifts quickly. He accidently loses balance before being able to reach for his clothes and falls out of the bushes.

Chan gasps in worry, hurrying over.

‘Are you hurt!?’ he asks.

‘Stop-!’ Minho tells him at once, ‘Don’t come closer!’

‘Are you hurt?’ Chan stops but he moves side to side, ‘Oh no, did that puppy scare you? Where are your clothes-?’

Minho frowns at him, pushing himself up to stand and walking back again to the bushes.

‘Wait! Don’t go!’ Chan calls out.

‘I’m still here!’ Minho yells back, ‘I’m just wearing my clothes!’

Minho pulls his clothes back on again. Why wasn’t Chan understanding by now? He should know by now shouldn’t he?

‘Well. Where are the shrimp chips?’ Minho asks him.

‘Why should I give you my shrimp snacks? And what did you do to that puppy?’ Chan demands instead, looking back at the bushes worriedly.

‘I’m the puppy,’ Minho declares, pointing at himself for emphasis, he was just going to have to really say it for Chan to understand.

Chan stares at him, very confused.

‘But you can’t be the puppy.’

‘Also I’m not actually a puppy,’ Minho scoffs a little, ‘I’m a werewolf.’

‘That’s just a made-up story, like vampires and ghosts,’ Chan tells him at once.

‘Vampires are made-up,’ Minho knows that because his mother said so, ‘But dad says there are ghosts everywhere.’

‘I don’t believe you. I’ve never seen a werewolf before- no one talks about werewolves.’ Chan tells him, looking a little bit scared now.

‘Because it’s a secret,’ Minho explains.

‘If it’s a secret why are you telling me?’ Chan asks back, ‘You just want to fool me.’

‘No!’ Minho is so frustrated he stomps his foot, ‘I’m telling you because you’re my friend.’

‘I am?’

Oh.

Did Chan not think of him as a friend? Was he just doing all of this for no reason?

‘Fine,’ he gets out, trying to sound angry instead of hurt, ‘Whatever, bye-!’

But Chan calls after him immediately.

‘No no-! Minho, we can be friends-!’

Minho walks away but glares back at Chan. Maybe his mother was right and maybe-

‘I’m really confused!’ Chan tells him, eyes big and pleading, ‘You’re telling me you’re a werewolf! How do I know you’re not just making it up!’

Minho stops in the middle of the dirt path, crossing his arms and facing Chan.

‘I know about your shrimp snacks,’ he tells him, ‘And I know about your mosquito spray- it smells really bad. And your baby brother Yongbok- he gets sick if he gets bitten. You’re also looking for cool stones and pebbles for your shed. I can show you cooler ones if you want.’

Chan doesn’t say anything and Minho is now very frustrated.

Why wasn’t he understanding?

Angrily, Minho takes his shirt off.

‘What are you doing?!’ Chan demands.

‘I’m going to show you!’ Minho declares, throwing down the shirt and then shimmying off his shorts and shifting, breaking every rule his parents set for him.

Chan falls on his butt, eyes widening.

He doesn’t scream or yell.

He just- he just stares.

Suddenly Minho is terrified.

He just exposed himself to a boy he thought was his friend. To a boy who didn’t think of him as a friend.

His mum was going to be so angry- his dad was going to be so angry!

So Minho runs.

His dad is working out in the fields when Minho gets back, a bunch of other people present as well. Minho wears the clothes he stashed in his shrubs and washes himself up cleanly.

He doesn’t want his dad to worry- and he doesn’t want to tell him what happened either.

If Chan was going to do something, then Minho would fix the mistake he made himself and take care of the situation. His dad already had so much work, he didn’t have to do this too.

He’s hesitant as he leaves for the woods the next day. Today he doesn’t shift. He should talk to Chan, like his dad taught him to. If they were friends, or they were going to be friends, they would have to talk- communicate, his dad had said some months ago when he first started school.

It would be important to do so.

He would solve this issue himself because he got into it by himself.

No need to worry dad.

Besides, he has a strong feeling that he can’t explain- he doesn’t have the words for it and he doesn’t know how to find it in the dictionary, but he knows he can trust Chan.

He also took out a smooth slightly shiny stone he found in the lake a couple of months ago when he was fishing with his dad. Maybe if he gave Chan a present, he wouldn’t tell anyone.

Chan is already waiting for Minho at the usual spot where they first met.

‘Minho!’ Chan jumps up and walks towards him eagerly, his expression showing no fear. Instead he looks excited and happy.

‘No,’ Minho quickly puts his hands up to stop him, ‘Stay there.’

‘Oh-. Um. Okay.’ Chan stops, not making any other move and he doesn’t look upset at Minho’s request either. Though he asks: ‘Why?’

‘Why what,’ Minho repeats, wondering how to tell Chan to not tell anyone about him.

‘Why do you want me to stay so far away?’ Chan asks him, shifting a little where he stood.

‘Because I don’t know you fully yet, I’m suspicious,’ Minho says the word carefully, hoping he pronounced it right.

‘I won’t hurt you,’ Chan tells him at once.

Minho believes him, but he needs proof. He needs to really know- he needs to be more careful and really observe Chan to make sure he wouldn’t do anything. But he also couldn’t scare him away and make him tell his parents or something.

‘Did you bring the shrimp chips?’ he asks instead.

‘Yes!’ Chan nods, ‘I’ll bring it! I brought two packets so you can have one. Do you want apple juice? Is that okay for you to drink?’

Minho nods in response.

Chan puts the packet of shrimp chips and apple juice box where he usually put them, opening the packet for him and putting the straw in even if Minho could use his hands. Then he walks back to his rock and takes his snacks out.

Slowly, Minho walks over to the snacks.

‘Do you want me to turn around?’ Chan asks him.

Minho pauses a little before he nods.

And Chan turns around just like that, no questions even if Minho wasn’t shifted.

‘It’s really hot today,’ Chan says, speaking a little louder so Minho could hear him better, ‘Do you feel very hot when you’re a wolf?’

Minho grabs the snacks and heads back to his spot, opening the packet a little wider as he says, ‘Not that bad. It’s nicer in winter. I like staying as a wolf in winter, but dad says I should learn to adjust.’

‘Oh- is your dad a werewolf too?’ Chan asks interestedly.

‘No. Mum is,’ Minho replies as best as he can with shrimp chips in his mouth.

‘Wow, that’s so cool,’ Chan tells him earnestly- he sounded like he was smiling.

Chan smiled a lot. It was nice. It made Minho feel better.

‘Where do you live?’

‘In the farm past the hill behind the lake,’ Minho tells him.

‘Oh, that’s so far away,’ Chan exclaims, ‘Do you swim in the lake?’

‘Sometimes,’ Minho replies, ‘Mostly at night, with my dad.’

‘Does your mum also swim with you?’

‘Mum’s gone out, it’s just me and dad right now,’ Minho tells him. He always felt uncomfortable when people asked him about his mother. The looks in people’s eyes when he answers them, the way they treat him, the way they look at his dad.

‘Oh I see.’

Chan doesn’t sound like he thinks something is wrong with him or his dad or his mum.

‘You live with that grandma right?’ Minho asks in turn.

‘Yeah!’

‘My mum said her dad used to have a friend there,’ Minho explains- they were the only farms out here for a long time.

‘Oh!’ Chan says excitedly, ‘Grandma told me that grandpa had a wolf friend! This is really cool Minho!’

Minho is surprised by this information. Chan’s grandpa knew his grandpa? Is that why Chan wasn’t scared of him?

‘So are you moving in?’ Minho asks, wondering if he would go to his school now. Could he have a friend in school like this?

‘Just for summer break,’ Chan tells him, ‘We’re going to stay with grandma during our longer breaks, but we have to go to school back in the city.’

Oh. So he would leave.

‘Do you go to school?’ Chan asks.

‘Of course I do- I go to school here,’ Minho frowns- just because he wasn’t in a city didn’t mean he didn’t go to school!

‘Are there other werewolves?’ Chan asks excitedly.

‘No,’ Minho replies, his stomach feeling funny at the idea of Chan leaving eventually. He wasn’t even going to stay and Minho told him about himself.

‘Does anyone else know you’re a werewolf?’ Chan asks, lowering his voice like they were talking about a secret.

‘No,’ Minho tells him even more quietly, getting up.

‘I won’t tell anyone!’ Chan tells him sincerely, ‘Don’t worry Minho! I’m your friend, and I will protect your secret okay?’

Minho looks at Chan’s back for a moment before he quietly takes the stone out from his pocket and puts it down where he usually sat before heading back the way he came. He doesn’t know how to answer all of the questions- but he doesn’t want to scare Chan even if he would leave at the end.

He hopes the present will work, maybe he would stay that way?

He can hear Chan still talking as he quietly makes his way out of the clearing but he can’t make out what he’s saying.

Minho doesn’t want to answer questions- he’s scared of Chan’s reaction if he answers them. Maybe it was better if he stayed shifted even if he had questions for Chan.

It rains for a couple of days so Minho stays inside, sometimes helping his dad out especially with the chickens. Minho knows the chickens can sense him, and they always reacted differently to him.

Minho asked his dad once what would happen if he met a real wolf- not a shifter like his mum, but a real wolf. Dogs seemed to like him, cats too- there were several houses that had dogs on his way to school and they always greeted him excitedly even if they were confused at first. They were never angry or scared- just excited, and Minho likes it. He wonders how it would be if he played with them but his dad never allowed him to do so just in case.

When it stops raining, Minho makes his way back, nervous and worried again. He would stare out of the window time to time, wondering if he’d see people coming to take him away. However, thankfully, no one ever comes- only the people who worked in the farms with his dad.

But somehow despite his fears and worries, his mothers words echoing in his mind nonstop, Minho can’t help the confidence in him, in Chan.

So he takes him to his pond.

He watches Chan carefully as he his maybe-friend looks around excitedly, saying wow loudly as he steps towards the pond with excitement. He looks at all of the trees, rushing around everywhere to see everything. They settle near the pond across each other and Chan throws him a packet of shrimp snacks before turning around without Minho having to ask him.

‘Can I come here sometime?’ Chan asks him, looking up and around the canopy.

‘Only you,’ Minho tells him.

‘Yeah of course!’ Chan tells him sincerely, ‘I wouldn’t bring anyone else here.’

‘Not even your mum?’

‘I won’t bring anyone,’ Chan promises, turning a little to look at him, eyes wide and true, ‘I’m sorry about last time, I thought that maybe you were a puppy- a dog puppy, and mum said it would be good to take you to the vet just in case you were sick.’

‘Oh,’ Minho had thought that was the case, ‘I see.’

‘Yeah, so um, don’t worry, I won’t take you to the vet- and I won’t tell anyone about you okay? It’s our secret now.’

Minho stares at him, his mother’s words echoing all around but they fade away because he can feel how honest and true Chan was being. So Minho nods and Chan beams at him, happy and relieved.

‘Can I ask you some questions?’ Chan asks him as they eat their snacks, ‘You’re the first werewolf I know about that isn’t from movies and cartoons.’

‘Those are mostly wrong,’ Minho tells him immediately, ‘What do you want to know?’

Chan wants to know a lot. But it’s fun answering these questions. It’s a little silly, but Minho knows Chan doesn’t know anything about shifters so of course he would ask silly questions like if he could eat chocolate.

As a result of this, a few days later, Chan brings with a lot of excitement, slightly soft chocolate ice-cream for them both.

It’s really tasty and refreshing but very sticky and it makes the Chan’s mouth all brown with chocolate.

They wash their faces and hands in the pond before they start splashing each other with the water, laughing brightly.

This was it.

Minho knows it for certain.

Chan was not just going to be his friend.

He was going to be his best-friend.

Best-friends need attention and affection, just like plants and trees.

Even though Chan was older than him (he’s 10 and Minho is 9) and he liked to do things for Minho, he also asked Minho a lot of cool questions and respected his answers and tried to understand more about what it was like being a shifter. Minho likes this.

Minho has never had siblings- he’s thought about how it would be to have a sibling, older or younger, it didn’t matter. But he decided that maybe he preferred just being like this with dad.

Chan was an older brother, and he was very proud of this, Minho can tell. Was Minho like a younger brother to him? Minho knows he’s older than Yongbok, Chan’s baby brother- but he’s still younger and he’s not sure if Chan sees him as that.

And Minho has always been independent. He never wanted his dad to do things for him if Minho already knew how to do it. He does his best to do everything by himself even if it might take time or it’s not perfect. But he knows he’ll do better with practice.

But sometimes it was difficult to do things by yourself.

For example when you hurt yourself- small cuts and gashes were okay for Minho, he knew what to do. But today it’s different. His bone hurts from his fall and his cut has more blood than he’s seen before, the mud doesn’t help at all either.

‘Can I come and help you clean it?’ Chan asks him worriedly, ‘I don’t want it to be infected.’

Minho wishes he could walk this off like he has a few times- like Chan has a few times when they’ve bumped and scraped themselves on stuff. But this really hurt. And Chan was right. He doesn’t want an infection.

So he nods.

Chan was always careful in coming close to him- he didn’t want to make Minho feel bad and he listened to him especially when he wasn’t shifted and felt a little weird with being too close to anyone that wasn’t his dad. He was better with it now- very quickly, very different from how Minho felt being with his classmates. He doesn’t want to push Chan away like he does with other kids his age, instead he likes it when he does come sit closer or when they share snacks together.

So Chan comes slowly towards him with water, Minho holds his knee out to him to make him hurry a little. Chan pours some water over his cut and it feels a little better- cooler and with no blood and mud and dirt.

‘Will you wait for a few minutes?’ Chan asks him, ‘I’ll go bring a band-aid and the cream my mum uses on my cuts- it won’t hurt.’

‘Just you,’ Minho reminds him.

‘Yeah! Of course,’ Chan nods firmly.

Minho doesn’t have to wait long- Chan was a fast runner and he hurries out of the woods. Minho pours the water over his knee a few more times, trying to bend and stretch his leg a little- he wonders if he broke any bones but he’s seen Mr. Son who helps his dad out with the farm break his ankle and he had screamed loudly before fainting. The pain was probably really bad- worse than this, so Minho doesn’t think he’s broken anything.

Minho sighs- if he couldn’t walk they wouldn’t be able to play for a while. This was going to suck so bad.

He hears Chan return with fast steps, careful through the slippery muddy dirt paths before he appears, sweat on his forehead, hair messy.

‘I-I’m back!’ Chan gasps out, ‘I got the things!’

Chan does his best to be gentle and careful but it really does hurt and Minho makes fists with his hands, gritting his teeth down hard.

‘It’s okay if you want to cry,’ Chan tells him, ‘I won’t tell anymore.’

Minho doesn’t want to cry. Not in front of Chan- he doesn’t want to show that he was weak.

Chan does a really good job- he’s very gentle too.

‘Can you stand?’ Chan asks him, ‘We can go sit over there?’

Minho nods. It’s painful to stand, his knee feels like it’s on fire when he puts his weight on it.

‘How will you go home?’

‘It’ll be fine after a while,’ Minho replies, hoping he sounded convincing.

‘I can walk you home,’ Chan tells him.

‘It’s far,’ Minho shakes his head at once, ‘And you don’t know how to get back.’

‘You said the stream takes you to the lake right? Then I can follow the stream,’ Chan insists, ‘It’s okay, I know I’ll be able to find my way back.’

But Minho shakes his head again.

‘Please let me help you,’ Chan pleads, ‘I swear I won’t get lost. I don’t want you to get more hurt Minho.’

He would do this with Yongbok- this was definitely Chan being a good older brother, a good friend. He doesn’t think he’ll be able to really walk, and he doesn’t think he should shift either- it might hurt more or become bigger. So he nods at Chan.

‘Do you want to hold my hand?’ Chan offers, holding his hand out to him.

Minho wants to walk by himself so he shakes his head.

‘If we go now, we can walk slowly,’ Chan tells him, ‘It’ll be okay.’

Minho really tries to walk by himself but everything hurt and he wants to cry, heart hurting too because he doesn’t know how long it would take for his wound to heal and if he’d be able to play with Chan any time soon again.

‘Hyung.’

Chan who was a little ahead of him stops at once, looking back with worry, eyes going to his knee immediately and then back up at him.

Minho looks down, holding his hand out to the older boy.

‘Oh-.’

‘-in case you get lost.’

Chan laughs, walking over to him. He’s not laughing at Minho- at least he doesn’t think so.

‘Okay,’ Chan says, taking his hand, ‘Thank you Minho-yah.’

Chan doesn’t let go of his hand even once.

When he gets home his dad checks on his knee properly, telling him that they did a good job cleaning the wound. His dad does his wound dressing better after he showers and he’s all clean. He feels a little agitated and tells his dad that Chan walked him back but he’s not sure if he got back safely or not as he’s never been this far out before. His dad goes to the phone at once and Minho waits.

‘I called to make sure he got back,’ his dad tells him when he comes back, ‘He’s watching TV with his brother right now.’

Minho sighs in relief.

‘Feeling okay? Does your knee hurt badly?’ his dad asks as he sits next to him.

‘No, I’m okay,’ Minho nods bravely.

‘It’s okay if it hurts,’ his dad tells him gently, ‘I know it hurts- don’t move it too much okay? And don’t touch it.’

‘I won’t,’ Minho promises.

‘It looks like it might rain for a couple of days,’ his dad warns him as he pats his head, ‘You won’t be able to go play outside. Do you want me to ask Chan’s parents if he can come here and play here with you?’

Minho suddenly feels shy about Chan coming here, seeing his home; it felt too private somehow. He shakes his head.

‘If you change your mind, let me know.’

Minho nods, curling into his dad’s side.

As he falls asleep, Minho realizes he’s never really told his dad about Chan and briefly wonders how he knew about his friend and who to call.

It’s six whole days before Minho is able to go back and play, the rain going away and the sun out bright and warm. He runs, pleased with how quickly he healed- his dad was a little surprised, staring at his knee with surprise because the wound had healed up very quickly and his skin was only a little sensitive and a different colour but other than that there was no pain.

He waits for a while with a bag of plums, fresh from the tree, before Chan hurries towards the clearing, smile growing wider when he spots him and-!

‘Minho!’

Chan runs up to him and hugs him hard.

Minho immediately freezes, not even breathing, unsure what to do – should he hug him back? But before he can, Chan takes a step back, smiling widely, so happy to see him.

‘You’re okay!’

Minho can feel his face turning hot as he nods.

‘Yay!’

‘Here,’ Minho hands his friend the plums, ‘They’re the first batch. Dad and I picked it after the rain, they’re very clean. I checked all of them and they don’t have any worms.’

‘Wow!’ Chan exclaims, ‘Thank you Minho-yah.’

They eat the plums together, and Minho tells Chan about his knee and Chan carefully touches his knee with his cleanest non-plum juice covered finger. He tells Chan about their fruit trees- he liked the plum trees a lot, they weren’t very big, and he thinks plum flowers were the prettiest. It would be nice to see them grow wild out in the woods and Minho tells Chan about this so they go and bury the seeds in different places around the woods.

‘Maybe we can eat the fruit that grows from them when we get older,’ Chan says hopefully.

‘Will we still be friends then?’ Minho asks him, hoping he didn’t sound too worried or something.

‘Of course,’ Chan says with sincere expression, ‘We’ll always be friends Minho-yah.’

‘Okay.’

As Chan was a big brother, Minho guesses he knew how to do many things.

‘Do you know how to cook?’ he had asked Chan once.

And that was when Minho found out that not only was Chan a big brother, but he just naturally wanted to always help, always wanted to do things for other people. Minho was like that with his dad- only his dad. But Chan was so helpful, always doing things, always learning.

It was really cool actually – Chan would make a really good adult, Minho thinks.

They become even closer friends; Minho talks to him Chan about everything- things he didn’t know brought him so much joy or interest, but he’s eager having a friend, and he loves hearing Chan tell him things too, loves to learn more about his friend.

This was the best summer of his life.

Whenever he goes home now he tells his dad about everything they did- Minho doesn’t shift as much, wanting to just talk, respond to Chan, laugh with him.

But the rain hits them again- a big storm, and it last nearly a week. It’s not as bad as it used to be like when he was younger. Minho knows that being outside while it rained wasn’t good for him, even when he’s not shifted. So he rather stay indoors. He’s older now, and while he knows storms aren’t really scary, that didn’t stop him from being scared. His dad always stayed close and sometimes when it was bad Minho would shift and curl up in his dad’s bed but he hasn’t done that in a while now.

He likes the rain, but he’s grateful that the worst part is over. The moment the clouds are gone and the sky is clear and his dad tells him it was safe to go out again, Minho dashes back to the woods, to their woods, their spot.

But Chan is not there.

He waits hours and hours for a couple of days and each time he comes home sad and confused. He thinks he hears Chan approaching on the third day but he knows Chan’s steps, and this didn’t sound like him. Minho hides and waits and realizes it’s Chan’s mum and Yongbok.

He watches them for a while, controlling his whine, wanting to ask why Chan wasn’t out here. But instead he watches as Chan’s mum laughs as Yongbok tries to pull at some plants before helping him.

Minho feels an odd emotion he doesn’t know how to name as he watches Chan’s mum kiss Yongbok’s head, never letting go of his hand, even crouching down a little so that Yongbok wouldn’t have to reach up too high.

She had Chan’s eyes- kind and warm. They have the same smile too.

He watches them until they leave and Minho guesses Chan wasn’t coming today as well. He gets home around the same time as his dad who tells him that he met grandma and tells him about Chan got sick so he was recovering.

Minho is instantly worried.

Minho rarely got sick, and if he did, he recovered quickly. But Chan was a city-boy and he was new to this place, what if being in the woods made him sick?

He goes everyday to the woods and closer to grandma’s house, hoping to catch sight of Chan.

When his dad goes to the town, Minho accompanies him with their fruit harvest. There his dad points out grandma and she comes over to say hi. Minho hides behind his dad, a bit embarrassed. But he puts together some of the plums in a little bag and quietly asks his dad if he can give them to Chan. He immediately hides again as his dad tells grandma and she happily takes the plum, personally giving Minho some money for it as well even though it was supposed to be a gift.

A couple of days later as he makes his way to grandma’s house, a new routine now, he hears Chan near their pond. A bolt of happy energy charges through him and Minho sprints through the woods and into the clearing and there-!

Minho has no thoughts, just pure happiness at seeing Chan well and not hurt. He charges him down and Chan laughs delightedly as Minho snuggles into him, pressing his nose around him, making sure he smelt all right, that he wasn’t sick or hurt.

‘Minho-!’ Chan laughs delightedly.

Chan hugs him and Minho can’t hug him with his shifter limbs so he changes at once. He needs his arms to hug Chan back!

‘-hyung!’ Minho exclaims, ‘You’re better!’

‘I am!’ Chan says happily. He didn’t look sick at all. Minho was so worried he’d be thin and pale. But he looked good!

‘I was really worried, did you get the plums from our farm?!’ Minho demands as he pushes himself away a little to give Chan space to sit up.

‘I did,’ Chan confirms, ‘Thank you Minho-yah, I feel like they made me better.’

Minho hadn’t expected to meet Chan today so he hadn’t brought his extra clothes. So Chan takes off his shorts for him to wear- they’re around the same size even if Chan was a year older so it’s comfortable for Minho- this way he can still talk and not worry about dirt and insects biting his butt.

‘I missed you,’ Chan tells Minho.

Minho feels himself squirming with an emotion he doesn’t know how to describe other than being very very happy.

‘I missed you too hyung.’

They spend even more time together- meeting even earlier and staying out until the sun went down- they explore more of the woods together but their favourite thing to do was stay by the pond especially when it got really hot and gross. Chan sometimes brought an old mat so that they could sit on it because last time Chan got lots of ants on him and that wasn’t a fun experience.

They’re both on the mat, the heat was really bad and it made them both lazy and sleepy. But the woods were cooler, there was a gentle breeze and they nap together.

This was nice too. Minho hopes they can always do this together.

He hears the sound of the evening birds chirping around and Minho wakes up from his nap. He feels drowsy but it was definitely cooler now than earlier. He wakes Chan up by pawing at him, nudging his face with his nose and licks his face for fun because Chan always squealed and said gross but never stopped Minho.

‘I’m up-,’ Chan yawns, ‘Hi Minho.’

Chan quickly grabs his head and squeezes him a little, fingers poking and rubbing around his ears. Minho would be giggling if he wasn’t shifted so he squirms away, shaking himself out of Chan’s hold.

It was time to go home- it was quite late now, and Minho’s sure it’ll be dark by the time he gets back.

Chan tells him they’ll see each other again tomorrow, smiling sleepily at him.

Minho pads his way over to his friend, nosing near his neck.

It felt right to do.

Minho leans into the side of Chan’s head, allowing him to be close to his neck too. He’s only ever done this with his dad- sometimes with his mum, but that was a long time ago. He’s never wanted to do this with other kids, or even adults. But with Chan, this felt nice. It felt good.

Yes, he thinks, safe.

Chan giggles, his hands coming up to his head and neck and brushing through his fur happily.

Minho breathes out happily.

This was truly the best summer.

And Minho wishes it would last forever- but summer couldn’t last forever, autumn had to come, he had to continue going to school and-

‘I’ll be going back home next week,’ Chan tells him.

Minho actually never really liked summer- it was too warm. He liked autumn best- his fur felt nicest then too, and the woods smelt nicest then too. But this summer was so nice- he liked it so much.

And now Chan was leaving, taking that really nice summer with him.

Would Chan leave forever? Would he never come back? Would this be the last best summer?

Minho hates the way he feels, his stomach twisting and knotting almost like that one time he got sick from eating something too stale.

Suddenly he can’t go back to the woods – it felt too much, Minho thinks he might cry if he sees Chan right now.

His dad notices that he doesn’t leave after the first two days.

‘Are you feeling unwell?’ his dad asks worriedly when he finds Minho sitting in front of the TV, not really watching the cartoon.

‘No,’ Minho mumbles.

‘I thought you’d be out playing with Chan,’ his dad says, sitting next to him and checking his forehead just in case anyway. ‘What happened? Did you get into a fight?’

‘No,’ Minho shakes his head, looking down at his hands. It felt dumb to say.

‘What happened?’ his dad asks gently.

‘I don’t want him to leave,’ Minho mumbles.

His dad makes a sound of understanding, gently patting his head.

‘He’s been a good friend right?’ he asks.

Minho nods.

‘A very good friend- like a best-friend.’

‘Then I’m sure he feels the same way too,’ his dad tells him reassuringly.

‘What if he forgets me?’ Minho says.

Like mum he thinks, but he doesn’t say it.

‘I don’t think anyone would forget you,’ his dad tells him sincerely.

Minho doesn’t think that’s true, but he doesn’t think his dad is a liar; maybe this was one of those complicated adult things he would only understand when he gets bigger.

Maybe if Minho gave him a present that he would remember him by.

Minho remembered his mother every time he looked through the stones and minerals she gave him. Maybe he could give him one so that way he would always remember Minho even if he didn’t come back. He selects the prettiest one in his collection- the smooth rich yellow one that reminds him of honey inside a hive, a little bit like tree sap, and the colour of the jam they made from apricots – sweet, warm, and a lot like sunlight. It was perfect for Chan.

‘It’s like a precious stone,’ his dad had explained to him a couple of years ago, ‘Some of these stones look plain and simple right? But if you polish them, they become like gemstones.’

‘Why would mum give them to me,’ Minho frowned, ‘I don’t know how to take care of precious stones.’

‘It’s because you’re precious,’ his dad tells him, ‘You’re the most precious thing for me and your mother- and sometimes…sometimes we give the people we love the most precious thing we have as a sign of trust, care, and confidence.’

This piece was the best one Minho had with him.

He has to make Chan remember him. He needs to know that he was Minho’s best-friend, that he was precious to him, the way his dad explained to him.

‘They’ll leave tomorrow,’ his dad tells him after he calls grandma to see if Chan was still here, ‘Why don’t you take grandma some fruits? Chan’s family will like some too I think, right?’

Minho nods.

They put together a nice clean batch of fruits- all the best ones all in the same size, and even if it’s a little heavy Minho tells his dad he doesn’t need help and takes the bags himself all the way to grandma’s house.

He hopes Chan isn’t upset at him.

When he gets to the little road leading up to grandma’s house, Minho pauses a little, patting down his shirt and making sure he looked neat for Chan’s family before making his way again.

Chan’s baby brother opens the door- Yongbok. He’s a sweet looking boy and he becomes very shy the moment he sees Minho. Grandma sees him and makes her way to him.

‘Grandma, this is for you and uh, Yongbok, you can have these with your parents and brother,’ Minho tells the boy, handing them both the two different bags of fruits he brought over.

‘Minho-yah, these look amazing, Bokkie, say thank you to your Minho-hyung.’

Yongbok shyly ducks behind grandma, holding on to her pant legs.

‘Thank you Minho-hyung,’ he whispers.

‘Oh?’

Minho ducks his head a little more when a man comes over towards them. This was Chan’s dad for sure - Minho remembers seeing him many weeks ago.

‘Hello,’ he greets Minho, ‘Are you Lee Minho?’

‘Yes,’ Minho bows, ‘Nice to meet you.’

‘It’s nice to finally meet you too Minho-yah,’ Chan’s dad smiles, ‘You came here to see Chan?’

Minho nods.

‘I’ll tell him you’re here, do you want to come in?’

Minho shakes his head a little, bowing again.

‘Oh these look so nice,’ grandma says as she checks the contents of the bag, ‘Right Bokkie?’

Yongbok nods shyly again, not looking away from Minho for a second.

‘This is your hyung’s best-friend,’ grandma chuckles, patting Yongbok’s head, ‘He’s your hyung now too, right Minho?’

Minho nods, ‘You can be my younger brother too.’

Yongbok smiles shyly at that.

‘Oh, and these are amazing plums, thank you so much,’ grandma tells him, looking at the bag Yongbok was nolding, ‘It’s nice to meet you Minho-yah, do come by any time okay?’

Then Chan shows up at the back, eyes big, surprised.

Minho finds himself smiling hard, wanting to jump up and down a little.

‘Minho! You’re here?’

Minho notices how Chan’s parents were at the back, watching them with smiles on their faces.

‘Uh, just um, thought maybe you’d want a snack?’

‘Yeah! Yeah I could, um, yeah- I want a snack!’ Chan says excitedly.

Minho steps back, bowing once more in general before running off towards the woods and calming himself there amidst the soft sounds of the woods.

Minho watches as Chan runs out of the house, making his way towards him. Minho moves back a little further into the woods and waits till Chan is close enough.

He looks happy, eyes bright and he’s smiling widely, the small pokey-holes on his cheeks really popping up.

‘Hyung,’ Minho begins before Chan can say anything. Before he can ask why Minho hadn’t come to their spot in so many days.

‘Yeah?’

‘Here,’ Minho holds the stone to him, ‘Present as you’re leaving.’

Chan walks over slowly, eyes wide, holding both hands out.

‘Oh,’ he breathes out in awe.

Minho drops it into his waiting hands, hoping Chan would like it.

‘It’s so pretty!’ Chan tells him, looking intently at the pretty stone.

‘Mum finds these stones and brings them sometimes,’ Minho tells him, ‘This one is my prettiest piece.’

‘If your mum gave it to you then I can’t take it,’ Chan gasps in worry, ‘And it’s your best piece.’

‘That’s why I’m giving it to you,’ Minho tells him firmly.

It meant something precious- to have something precious was to take care of it. To be given something precious meant trust, care, and confidence.

Minho knows these words. And he knows he has them with Chan.

‘Oh,’ Chan holds the stone securely in his hand, smiling at Minho, ‘I will always keep this safe with me.’

That’s what Minho wanted to hear- Chan would keep it safe, he would remember Minho now.

Chan carefully puts the stone in his pocket, closing the button to make sure it would stay inside and not fall out.

‘When will you come back?’ Minho finally asks, worried about the answer.

‘I’ll come back for the winter break,’ Chan tells him at once, extending out his pinky finger, ‘It’s a promise.’

In the winter? This year?

Minho was expecting years- like his mother, appearing at random with no schedule. But this winter? During school break? So they could play together more?

Minho locks their pinkies- a good strong promise, he knows that. It makes him happy- relieved. So relieved that he steps up to Chan and hugs him.

He hears Chan make a happy sound, hugging him back and hard, squeezing him a little.

Minho’s only ever been hugged by his dad and some gentle ones from some aunties. He’s never been hugged by someone his size. It felt nice.

Minho squirms, giggling because it felt nice. He should hug Chan more.

Chan giggles too, bouncing on his feet a little.

Instinctively Minho leans into Chan’s space, into the exposed vulnerable spot near his neck and throat, exposing his own even as a human before he steps back, suddenly feeling a little shy.

‘Okay. I’ll see you in the winter, Chan-hyung.’

Chan takes his hand, squeezing it happily.

‘I’ll see you soon Minho.’

They walk back to the house, still holding hands.

Yongbok shyly waves at him from behind their mother who introduces herself to Minho. She had a lovely voice and Chan definitely had her kind eyes, she shakes his hand like grown-ups do and pats his head. They tell him to stay for lunch but Minho is starting to feel overwhelmed and he shakes his head, looking down at his feet.

‘Maybe next time?’ Chan’s mother says.

Minho nods mutely.

‘Chan-ah, how about you walk Minho out till the road?’ grandma says, ‘Then we’ll start on lunch?’

‘Okay!’ Chan says eagerly, taking Minho’s hand again.

They walk out into the bright sunshine and Minho wonders if Chan is wearing any of that funny smelling sunscreen yet or he would turn bright red again.

‘You don’t have to be shy around my family,’ Chan tells him, ‘Don’t be scared! I haven’t told them anything- not even to my mum.’

‘I know,’ Minho mumbles. ‘I just- I get um, shy that’s all, m’not scared.’

‘They’re your family now too,’ Chan tells him, ‘My family is your family, and your family is my family.’

Minho smiles, nodding.

‘Your mum is pretty.’

‘Thank you!’ Chan says happily, ‘I think Bokkie really looks like her.’

Minho can see that but he thinks Chan looks more like her.

‘I’ll see you in winter okay?’ Chan tells him as they reach the road, ‘I’ll bring more comics! And my other Gameboys too!’

‘Okay,’ Minho grins, ‘We can build snowmen and have snow ball fights!’

‘Yes!’ Chan cheers.

And then he hugs Minho again before jumping a little, the excitement in him that mirrors in Minho bright and free.

‘Have a safe journey,’ Minho tells him, remembering what he’s heard older people say, ‘Drive safely.’

‘I will!’ Chan nods.

Chan waits out at the road until Minho is too far to see, waving every time he looked back around.

Minho needs winter to arrive as quickly as possible. He needs to play with Chan again, show him all of the cool things the woods has during winter like buried chestnuts and frozen tree sap that look like lava and ice-fishing too!

He gets antsy, waiting for winter to settle properly.

The first snow marks that he’s getting closer to seeing Chan. He had his birthday already, he was a year older now! And Chan would be older too- would that change things?

He paces around in the evenings, making his dad scold him for bringing in lots of snow on his fur and having him shake it off outside before chasing after him with a towel. Minho likes staying shifted in winter because he’s warmer this way- he can even go and burrow around the piles of snow without feeling too cold. His dad sometimes threw snowballs after him as he dodged it as best as he could before tackling his dad down.

It was now finally winter break and Minho goes everyday to the woods to check and see when Chan would be arriving.

He said he would come- but he has no idea when. Winter break wasn’t as long as summer break so Minho can’t really tell when to expect Chan.

It’s snowing heavily when Minho decides to head to grandma’s house. He doesn’t see extra shoes outside, only one light is switched on in the living room. He knows Chan slept in the extra room with Yongbok, they had a window that faced the woods where they usually played, Minho has seen it.

Minho finds a spot under Chan’s window and curls up there for a while, wondering if he should just stay here till he got there. But that seemed like a lot of waiting.

He gets up again, wondering how he would be able to find out Chan got back when after a couple of days of doing this, grandma finds him out in the snow.

Minho freezes, suddenly terrified and growling low in an effort to be intimidating before he remembers that grandma knew.

‘Why are you growling at me?’ she scolds him gently from the window where she spotted him.

Minho flattens his ears, ducking his head low in apology.

‘Minho-yah, why are you here like this in this weather, hm?’ Chan’s grandma asks gently, ‘Missed Chan?’

Minho can’t answer but he nods as best as he can, which more or less comes off as a head wriggle. Grandma goes back inside and after a while he hears her call his name from the front door. Feeling embarrassed, Minho makes his way to her and sits before her, head still down, ears still very flat.

‘I tell you what- I’ll call you to let you know when he’s coming okay? If you stay out here like this, you could get sick. Your dad will be worried.’

Minho grumbles a little and grandma makes a cooing sound at him.

‘You love him a lot hm? Our Channie is so lucky to have you.’

Minho thinks he’s lucky actually. But he can’t speak so he doesn’t say anything, letting grandma pet his head.

‘Go home, and I’ll call you and let you know when Chan’s coming okay? I’ll call you the moment I find out.’

Minho rubs his head against the elderly woman’s knees before spinning a little on the spot and running off.

And she does.

And she would continue to do so until Minho leaves for university years later.

When Minho gets the call he’s filled with excitement and energy, running laps all around the snow covered orchard in excitement as his dad laughs at him.

It had been months! Minho was excited to see his friend- his best-friend! He knows they haven’t called each other that, but he knows without a doubt, because Chan was the best amongst anyone he would call a friend. He was just the best in every way really, so of course he would be Minho’s best-friend.

Maybe Minho wouldn’t be Chan’s best-friend, but that was all right. Chan probably had other friends, who were better than Minho- they could be Chan’s best-friends. It did hurt a little to think about it- it’s not that he wants to be Chan’s only friend. That wasn’t really fair- besides, that would be lonely. Minho now also had other friends in school who were nice and funny and they could play together once Minho did his best to stop being shy. They welcomed him and they shared snacks during break time too so that was nice.

But with Chan it’s different. And not because he knew about Minho, but just because.

When the day comes, Minho excitedly runs to the woods first thing in the morning, barely eating his breakfast. He was awake even before his dad.

He spends his extra energy out in the woods, keeping his ears perked up for any sound of approach out here in the snowy woods.

He should have brought a gift. They had some nice small tangerines that weren’t the sweetest yet but were still tasty. But he was too excited and he forgot. Maybe tomorrow instead-?

What if he didn’t show up?

What if it was too cold? He’s heard people say it was much colder here than in the city. What if Chan just wants to stay inside? Minho doesn’t want to just go to grandma’s house for no reason- that wasn’t polite. Dad always said you shouldn’t show up uninvited to people’s homes. If you were going to visit unexpectedly, it was always good, like last time, to take a gift.

Or maybe he didn’t want to play with Minho- or he forgot about him.

Chan promised Minho- but lots of months has gone by and maybe he just-…maybe he just didn’t think Minho was worth seeing anymore.

He hears Chan’s footsteps crunching through the snow before he appears in the clearing. Chan is layered in thick winter gear.

For a moment Minho is scared he won’t greet him.

It makes him pause, not approach Chan how he wants, scared that Chan will be cold or worse, treat him like a burden.

‘Minho!’

Chan rushes to him, his breath white and cloudy as he laughs happily.

Minho freezes a little as Chan kneels before him, hugging him close and letting go to hug his head close.

‘-oh, sorry Minho-yah,’ Chan tells him, ‘I was really excited, I won’t hug you like that again.’

But Minho liked it, so he butts his head close to Chan’s, wriggling about a little. Chan giggles, hugging him back excitedly.

He smells his familiar smell, and Minho sighs out quietly.

His best-friend was back, like he said he would. He kept his promise.

‘This place is so cool in winter!’ Chan exclaims, looking around, ‘I can’t wait to explore what winter does to the trees!’

Minho shakes himself, making Chan grin at him.

‘You’re not cold?’ Chan asks with a small worried look before he says, ‘Your fur is so nice and thick, does it help? Or do you want my scarf?’

Minho was more than fine- sometimes his paws got cold but it wasn’t bad especially if he kept moving. Snow wasn’t bad, it was water that was annoying, or that gross melted snow and mud combination.

‘Let me know if you’re cold okay?’ Chan tells him, ‘I’ll give you my scarf.’

Minho jumps a little again, twirling on the spot before indicating that they should start moving.

Chan grins, looking just as happy as Minho felt.

‘Lead the way Minho-yah, I’ll follow you!’

Sometimes, your best-friend might grow up faster than you, but that doesn’t mean they will leave you behind.

‘You’re just kids.’

Minho can’t believe what he’s hearing.

‘Hyung,’ Seungkwan argues at once, ‘We’ve always played with you for years-.’

‘-hey, are you talking back to your hyungs?’ Chansoo sneers at once, a complete 180 from the cheerful senior they used to play football with.

‘Where’s Bora-noona,’ Eunbi demands at once.

‘Girls can’t play with boys,’ one of the other older boys laughs at once, ‘You’ll get hurt because you’re weak.’

Eunbi scowls at that, her knee already wrapped up in thick dressing. But Jungwoo had the same on his arm so it’s not like she got hurt only because she was a girl.

‘Go away,’ Chansoo says again, walking off, ‘You’re all too small, I don’t want to play football and have to babysit.’

Minho scowls as the older boys wave them away. They stare for a while, wondering if the older boys were just joking or something but they start playing amongst themselves, some of the other older boys gathering and playing cheerfully.

‘Come on,’ Seungkwan sighs, ‘Let’s go guys, they’re older now and they’re going to be weird about it.’

‘I can run faster than them,’ Eunbi says hotly.

She really could actually.

‘Let’s just play by ourselves,’ Juyeon tells them.

‘I have to go home,’ Minho tells them, ‘I’ll see you guys at school tomorrow.’

‘Okay,’ Seungkwan nods in understanding. He came from a farming house too so he also had work to do.

Minho bids them goodbye and heads back home.

Would Chan do the same? Would he think Minho was just a kid?

They weren’t small kids anymore. Chan was 13 now, and Minho 12.

Chan had grown a lot during the summer break, he was taller than Minho now. His voice sounded different too, and Minho hadn’t really thought much of it but now he’s worried.

When Chan and his family returned the following summer the year after they first met, Minho felt confident knowing Chan wouldn’t just disappear- that Minho could expect him every summer holiday, and every winter break too. There was no doubt about that. But now that he was older, a teenager, would Chan change?

But he’s worried for nothing- Chan looked so shocked when Minho told him about the older boys, his expression somewhat angry. Angry for Minho.

‘I wish we were the same age,’ Minho confesses.

He’d feel better knowing that Chan wouldn’t leave him behind if they were the same age.

‘There’s no need to worry Minho-yah,’ Chan tells him seriously, as he hurries up to walk by his side, their arms touching, ‘We’re best-friends, and we always will be, okay?’

Minho can hear how honest Chan is and he hopes he won’t change his mind. It makes him feel better, that at least for now, he still had his best-friend.

Minho stops and he leans in and lightly bumps his head against Chan’s, having to get on tip-toe a little to do so.

That summer Minho asks Chan shyly if he wants to play in the family orchards. Chan is very eager to do so and he properly meets Minho’s dad then too. Minho shows Chan all of their best fruit trees, their greenhouses, and their cool new hydroponic shelves as well as a few of those special racks to grow and cultivate mushroom. Minho likes mushroom- they smelt nice to him even when he shifted.

They harvest some of the mushroom and Minho’s dad cooks them a really tasty soup from it. Then they all walk back to grandma’s house, with some mushroom for her of course.

Minho is really happy that night. His dad is happy too, laughing alongside him as they stroll down the road back home, the moon bright and clear above them.

‘Chan can come play here any time he wants,’ his dad tells him, ‘It’s nice seeing you two run around.’

Minho beams at that- it was really fun, though in the woods he could stay shifted if he wanted without waiting for it to be dark.

Minho doesn’t remain a kid longer – he can feel it the most when he shifts. He knows he’s changed, and it wasn’t just because of his dad’s observations about how he’s become bigger, but his body felt different too. Not to mention the excessive shedding.

Or the weird body temperature fluctuations. One moment he’s sweating buckets, the next he’s chilly, his nose runny.

Sometimes he has no energy and all he wants to do is melt into the floor. Other times he runs the entire circumference of the lake twice over before he’s finally tired.

Sometimes he’s irrationally upset over the smallest lamest things like his zipper not sliding open properly when he really needs to pee. It makes him want to rip his pants apart.

Other times he feels nothing, not even when his favourite lunch is served in school, not even when his favourite movie comes on TV and his dad calls for him to watch it.

Minho is so confused by all that he’s feeling.

But for Minho, Chan is there, already having experienced it, currently experiencing it too. He tells Minho about how much random hair he was getting – like on his toes and fingers. In response to that Minho shakes himself, bringing a downpour of fur, causing his best-friend to yelp and laugh, spluttering as he spits out Minho’s fur from his mouth.

Over the years Minho has definitely gotten better talking to his classmates- he would definitely regard a few of them as good friends- but none of them are best-friends of course, but they’re all nice and Minho likes hanging out with them after school and sharing snacks and running hard around during PE.

But his friendship with Chan was definitely different – Minho likes his friendship with Chan a lot. Which is why he’s alarmed at himself when for no reason he starts behaving oddly towards his best-friend without even realizing it.

He hopes Chan doesn’t notice.

Minho is incredibly comfortable with Chan- that was one of the main things that made it different for Minho; knowing he could let go of everything with Chan, not have to hide or pretend anything.

And in that comfort Minho thinks he might let go too much- pushing into Chan’s space all the time, always wanting his attention, getting upset if Chan looks at something else or is distracted by comics or his Gameboy. It’s worse when he’s shifted, unable to really hold himself back from curling around Chan and rubbing up against him, demanding pets.

But Chan is much more open to petting him and hugging him when he’s shifted than he is when he’s not shifted. Minho sometimes wonders if Chan likes him better when he’s shifted – would he? But Minho doesn’t notice any change in Chan’s behavior towards him when he’s shifted versus when he’s not.

But he definitely hugged him a lot more when he was shifted that was for sure. And well, Minho likes it. So sometimes he’ll push Chan down and playfully bite around him. Chan always says he wants to become a shifter too, run and play with Minho in the woods like a wolf too.

Minho thinks that would be cool- but it would be a difficult life for Chan, and Minho doesn’t want Chan to ever go through anything bad. He’d make a cool wolf though – maybe one full colour, like grey, a nice silvery grey, not too light, not too dark.

But anyway, regardless of Minho’s behavior, Chan was always so happy to see him, always excited for them to play together. He didn’t look like a kid anymore- that was also how Minho knew that he was changing. Chan was a little taller than him, but Minho was catching up quickly. He was one of the tallest boys in his class, but as Chan was older than him it made sense if he was taller than Minho.

His voice also sounded a bit different, and his arms were longer than before too, his feet growing very big.

But despite all of this, he was the same Chan- his same hyung, his same best-friend.

Which is why Minho’s own changes felt so starkly different and strange even to himself.

Whenever Chan petted his head, playing with his ears and stroking down his head and neck, Minho internally battles with himself. He doesn’t want to be babied, only his dad ever did this to him really. And well, that was his dad. And sometimes Minho will shake himself away not because he disliked it, but because he wasn’t a kid anymore that had to be babied.

And Chan was his best-friend, only a year older than him. He shouldn’t baby him like this.

So sometimes Minho will push Chan away, grumbling and faux-sneezing away. He’s immediately worried that Chan will be offended; that he would be annoyed with Minho. But he never is. If Minho goes away he never tries to stop him or try to pull him back even playfully. He just smiles and they do something else.

Minho wishes he could just make up his mind about how he felt- it was frustrating not knowing the words to this.

Was this all just puberty? It couldn’t be, right?

His dad had said hormones were very small but very powerful and it would make him feel weird.

For how long? Minho isn’t even fully a teenager yet but he was already so tired of this.

He tells his dad and he laughs at him.

‘Wait till you grow a weird moustache,’ his father grins, ‘I’m sure Chan will grow one in a couple of years.’

‘A moustache?!’ Minho shudders, imagining his best-friend with a moustache, ‘Ew!’

His dad nearly doubles over with laughter at his reaction.

Minho hopes Chan never grows a moustache- he hopes he never grows a moustache! He doesn’t want to shave and he doesn’t think Chan should shave either because he’s sure he’ll cut himself.

‘If it happens, it happens,’ his dad laughs, ‘Some things are natural Minho-yah, there’s no stopping it.’

‘I don’t like puberty, can I just become 20 instead,’ Minho asks tiredly.

‘When you’re 20 you’ll miss being a teenager,’ his dad tells him with a knowing nod.

Minho scowls at that. He doesn’t think he’ll miss all of this weird feeling and fur and weird nail growth and bone ache and  toothache and definitely lots of pimples and stuff. At least when he’s 20 he’ll no longer be a teenager, he’ll understand so much more, and he won’t be weird.

He would definitely be in better control of himself at 20.

For sure.

And hopefully Chan would still be his best-friend at 20. And hopefully without a moustache.

Sometimes if your family is weird, it’s better that they never meet them.

When his mother appears out of the blue in the middle of the night, Minho is ecstatic and then immediately worried.

It had been nearly 6 years now since she last came to visit.

He first hears quiet voices, the main door that creaked loudly if you didn’t know how to set the latch down first whining a few times, indicating someone coming in and then out and then in again.

Unsure of what was happening, Minho steps out of his room and in the living room is his mother, setting down a bag, a small frown on her face as his father says something.

‘Mum?’

His mother’s eyes widen, shock on her features.

‘You’ve grown so much,’ is what she says.

She doesn’t reach out to him, doesn’t tell him to come to her, so he stays at the door.

‘Well, it was a long flight back,’ she says, ignoring his dad’s hand to take her bags from her to help her. ‘I’ll get some sleep in.’

‘I’ll get new bedding out for you,’ his dad says, ‘You don’t want anything to eat?’

‘I’m good,’ she nods before turning to him, ‘Go back to bed Minho.’

It’s weird.

When Minho wakes up the next morning he almost wonders if he dreamt what happened. But he finds his dad on the couch in the living room, his bedroom door closed.

‘Dad?’

‘Hm?’ his dad turns around, squinting a little before reaching for his glasses. ‘You’re up early Minho-yah.’

‘Was just making sure I didn’t dream mum up last night,’ Minho tells him, sitting on the floor before him, ‘How long is she here for?’

‘About a week,’ his dad replies.

Somehow this doesn’t really make Minho happy. And it’s probably too early or something and he can’t rein in his expression because his dad picks up on it.

‘It’ll be okay,’ he tells him, reaching out to pat his head. ‘It’s been a long time yeah?’

Minho knows it was for something like studying at a higher degree or whatever, which was why she hadn’t come visit him in so long. He didn’t know you could study that long as an adult. It sounded boring.

Minho shrugs a little, not knowing what to say.

‘You can sleep in my room dad,’ Minho tells him, ‘You’re old- you’ll hurt your back.’

His dad snorts.

‘I’m not that old.’

Minho gives his dad a loot before getting up.

‘I uh, I’ll go hang out with Chan-hyung,’ Minho mumbles.

His dad gives him a keen look, studying him a moment before he nods.

He stays out later, even after Chan leaves. His best-friend doesn’t question that he stays shifted because Minho knows Chan will pick up on his expressions if he doesn’t shift. He’s pretty sure he’s picked up on some stuff but he doesn’t ask Minho questions.

It’s a couple of days and Minho feels antsy. He hates how his home felt now- avoiding it and coming back to the oddest changes, to an air of unease and apprehension and amidst it his mother, who was now even more a stranger to Minho.

She always was, to an extent, but it’s more obvious now, it’s painfully obvious now.

And that’s what made it so frustrating, Minho thinks, that she would come back like this without warning, pretend everything was fine, like this was something she always did.

‘Why did you move the pan from the cabinet?’ she mutters as she looks around for the pan, ‘It’s always supposed to be here-.’

‘It was easier for me when I was younger to lift it from there,’ Minho explains as he takes it out from the lower cupboard that housed their cooking dishes.

‘Well it can go back to how it was.’

It’s not like you’re here so why does that matter he thinks but doesn’t say it.

‘Your grades are good,’ his mother states, ‘Good work.’

‘Thanks.’

‘No sports team?’

‘No- we just do PE, we don’t have sports teams,’ Minho explains.

‘That’s better- less occasions to mess up in,’ his mother nods, starting up the stove, a new one they bought a couple of years ago, and then, ‘-why was this changed? This doesn’t even make sense!’

Minho scowls a little, ‘I’ll do it mum.’

He starts preparing to make a simple fried-rice with eggs and kimchi, his mother watching him silently. He wonders if she’s impressed by what he can do- wonders if she’ll ask if dad taught him, or if he taught himself.

Chan’s handwritten notebook of simple recipes was still tucked into his desk even though he memorized all of the recipes and built off of that with his own twist and preferences. During the holidays his dad rarely cooked, more than happy to let Minho take over, eating whatever random thing Minho wanted to experiment with.

‘You’re out a lot,’ his mother says instead, ‘You’re barely home.’

‘It’s summer break – I like being out,’ he replies.

‘Your dad says you have a friend who comes here for summer breaks at the Jung property,’ she states.

Minho nods.

His mother doesn’t say anything for a while as Minho breaks the eggs into a bowl and starts beating them. Minho thinks that’s all the questions he’ll get, and he’s hoping she’ll step away but she doesn’t.

‘You’re still careful?’ his mother asks.

‘I don’t have to be. He’s my best-friend,’ Minho tells his mother, pulling back his frustration, a surge of recklessness washing over him. ‘I trust him-.’

His mother’s head snaps towards him, eyes widening in disbelief.

‘Minho,’ she says sternly, ‘What are you talking about?’

Irritation flares through him.

He knows he shouldn’t mention Chan- he knows he shouldn’t at all tell her that Chan knew everything about him; more than she did that was for sure. But suddenly he’s so angry. So hurt. He knows it’s irrational, he knows it’s not like his mother would be upset at herself for missing out on being here with him- if she wanted to, she would have but Minho wants his mother to feel the same hurt he’s been nursing for years and years.

‘He’s my best-friend,’ Minho grits out, barely seeing what he was stirring, ‘We’ve known each other for years-.’

‘-you told him.’

Minho switches off the stove and briefly glares up at his mother, unable to hold her gaze, ‘Yes-.’

He turns away, overwhelmed, angry and hurt but mostly at himself for even coming to this point and not just letting it go until his mother left.

‘That smells nice-,’ his dad says as he comes into the kitchen with a smile before he immediately catches on to the atmosphere in the kitchen.

‘I’m going out-,’ Minho mumbles, unable to look at his father too.

‘Minho-!’ his mother snaps, quickly grabbing him and turning him around to face him.

‘Woah hey what’s going on-?!’ his dad demands, quickly stepping in between them.

‘-explain yourself right now, how much does he know-?’ her hand tightens around his arm, eyes wide with disbelief- and was that fear?

‘I don’t have to,’ Minho manages, doing his best not to cry, doing his best not to let his voice shake, ‘I don’t have to tell you anything-!’

‘You’re living in my house,’ she hisses, ‘This is my family home-!’

‘-we are your family that means this is my house too-!’ Minho yells out, voice shaking.

‘It won’t be if you keep being this stupid, what is wrong with you-!’

‘-Mina-,’ his father frowns, taking her hands out from around Minho’s arm.

‘How could you let this happen?’ she demands, rounding up at him, ‘How did you let this happen-?’

‘-he’s my friend, I wanted a friend who would listen to me, who was there for me, who always came back for me-!’

His mother snarls at him, shifting through her clothes and storms out of the house.

‘Mina-!’

Minho doesn’t think- fear rushing through him. Minho rips through his clothes, shifting and sprinting after his mother. His dad yells after them both but Minho is already sprinting out through the backyard, hurrying after his mother. But she’s fully grown, more experienced, and definitely faster. But Minho does his best, trying his best to hurry through the woods that he knew better than her hopefully. She’d been away for so long, maybe she wouldn’t remember-?

He’s almost too late- his mother has Chan cornered at their pond and his best-friend is shaking a little, face pale and eyes filled with fear in a way it’s never been with him ever.

Mum! Minho yells stop! He’s my best-friend he would never hurt me-!

Silence! She yells at him. Stupid boy!

Leave him alone! Minho says as firmly as he can You cannot hurt him! He’s my friend!

He positions himself before Chan, hoping to block him from his mother.

His mother stares at him before growling and turning away.

Behind him Chan falls to the ground, his breathing uneven. Minho immediately turns his attention to him, worried. He nudges him a little, making sure he wasn’t hurt, immediately snuggling their heads together for comfort.

He needed to speak to Chan, to explain things. Recently he’d been keeping stashes of clothes in a plastic bag under a rocky shelf so he goes to shift and change into them. He keeps an ear out for his mother but doesn’t hear her anywhere.

He hopes she leaves them alone- Chan was his best-friend, she wouldn’t stop him, she couldn’t stop him.

He returns to Chan who was anxiously waiting for him.

‘That was my mum,’ Minho tells him as he pulls on slippers.

‘Your mum?!’ Chan exclaims, eyes wide.

‘Yeah,’ Minho sighs, wondering what he’d go home to later today. He notices his shirt is inside out, ‘She’s here for a week.’

‘Oh- oh, uh,’ Chan pauses, ‘That’s-…good?’

Minho hopes Chan won’t ask more questions.

‘Um, she’s scary,’ Chan tells him.

Minho agrees but he only shrugs in response as he takes his shirt off and wears it the right way around.

‘Will you also become that big?’ Chan asks, sounding-…not scared. He actually sounds excited.

‘Maybe,’ Minho frowns at his best-friend, ‘Why are you never scared of me?’

No matter what Minho did, snap his teeth or growl or even bark (it felt wrong but sometimes Minho tested to see), Chan never got spooked or scared. Instead he smiled or laughed.

‘I’m not scared of you,’ Chan tells him with a bright laugh, ‘You’re so pretty and cute- you don’t scare me.’

Minho doesn’t know how to feel- there are no words he immediately knows that really explains how he feels. First he feels his face warm up a lot, almost painfully in fact. His hearing is nearly entirely filled with a sort of buzzing that makes it hard to focus.

‘Don’t call me that-!’ he gets out desperately, the strange sensation of Chan’s honest words almost like a physical pain in his bones like when he shifts sometimes.

He doesn’t know what to do or say, he just can’t be here right now so he shifts before he can really think about it and immediately runs away.

He feels bad about it though.

Today was tough- was this all puberty? Would it be worse after this? He fought with his mum, ran away from Chan- what else? He hates how he feels.

But he doesn’t get to really think much about it because when he’s home he can hear his mother yelling from the end of the orchard. Pulling on his shorts from the other stash he kept at the shed he makes his way towards the house to find his parents fighting- more like his mother yelling at his father about-

‘-ow could you let him be friends with that boy; a dumb boy who could tell his parents and everyone he knows about your son-?!’

Anger flares in him. Chan wasn’t a dumb boy.

He was really cool and nice and sweet- he was a little lame sometimes, and he often forgot a lot of what he studied, but that didn’t make him dumb.

But before he can say a single word in defense of Chan, his mother spots him and rounds up to him.

‘Lee Minho! In here now!’ she hisses, pointing to a spot before her.

Minho doesn’t move, hands forming fists by his side.

His dad is standing by the couch, arms crossed, expression frustrated and cautious.

‘What were you thinking?’ she demands, ‘Why can’t you just think about what this could-?’

‘-he’s my best-friend-!’

‘I don’t care what he is,’ his mother spits out, ‘You are endangering everything-.’

‘-he’s my best-friend!’ Minho repeats himself, ‘And I am his best-friend, he would never tell anyone-!’

‘Are you stupid?!’ his mother yells at him. ‘You’re jeopardizing not just yourself but your father-!’

‘Now you care about dad?!’ Minho spits back, rage shaking him but he stands his ground, tears prickling his eyes. ‘Because I didn’t think you did-!’

‘You don’t understand the lengths your father and I have gone to-.’

‘-how will I know anything about you when you’re never here?!’ Minho chokes out, voice catching in his throat as his tears spill out, ‘I don’t even know you! Why are you even here when you clearly don’t love me or dad?!’

His mother stalks towards him, eyes on fire and Minho shifts without even thinking about it, snarling as he backs away. His mother shifts as well, more than twice his size, growl so loud and deep it shakes through the floors.

STUPID CHILD she hisses at him UNAWARE, RISK, DANGER-!

YOU’RE NEVER HERE FOR ME! Minho screams. WHAT DOES IT MATTER TO YOU – HE’S MY BEST FRIEND, I CHOSE HIM HE’S MINE!

BETRAYAL – HUNT – PAIN PAIN PAIN

NO- THE ONLY PERSON WHO HAS BROUGHT PAIN HAS BEEN YOU-!

She lunges at him, snapping her jaws.

Minho is still growling but his legs give way, sinking to the ground and-

‘Stop this-!’ his father gasps out, rushing out to try and stand in between them. But Minho is suddenly scared his mother will bite his dad so he Minho scrambles painfully, fear locking his limbs but more than anything determined to not let anything happen to his dad.

His mother growls at him again, annoyed, clearly. Minho pushes against his dad, pushing him away as best as he could even though he was shaking all over, shaking from hurt and anger.

‘Stop this, why are you punishing him for making choices?’ his father demands as he crouches down, trying to pull Minho back, ‘It’s his life, I’m here to protect him-!’

His mother barks harshly and it’s a terrifying sound, making him collapse, his legs giving way like they were made of jelly. His father holds him close at once, body shaking with Minho’s.

REGRET. REGRET- PAIN SUFFER – ALONE – ALWAYS ALONE.

You wouldn’t be alone if you stayed.

His mother snarls at him before turning around and leaving through the back of the house.

Minho falls limply in his father’s arms, dizzy and overwhelmed.

His dad holds him close, stroking between his ears, nuzzling into his nape soothingly. Minho can hear his heart, he can feel it with how close his father was holding him, beating just as fast as Minho’s- he scared his dad, made him upset, and-!

Minho shifts, sobs escaping him as he thrashes a little in his father’s arms.

‘I’m sorry,’ Minho heaves out as soon as he can, ‘I’m sorry dad-.’

‘No no,’ his dad whispers, rocking them a little, ‘You- you have every right being upset-!’

‘-I’m sorry I scared you-,’ Minho can barely speak, ‘I’m sorry-!’

‘You didn’t scare me,’ his dad reassures him, ‘You didn’t- just breathe Minho-yah, you’re okay, I’m okay-.’

‘-I’m sorry-,’ he keeps saying.

‘I’ll protect you- okay? You don’t have to worry Minho-yah, dad’s here, I’m always here for you okay?’

Minho falls asleep in his dads arms, exhausted in a way he’s never been before.

He’s vaguely aware of his dad carrying him to bed.

It smells like his dad and Minho is instantly comforted. He hasn’t slept in his dad’s bed in many years now, but this felt good and cozy and comforting.

He wakes up rather abruptly in the middle of the night, suddenly overwhelmed with fear that his mother would go and attack Chan.

His father is deep asleep and Minho quietly leaves the bedroom, noting the rolled up mattress on the floor to the side. Was that where his mother slept? She didn’t sleep on the bed?

Quietly making his way to the backdoor, Minho listens intently before shifting, paws landing softly on the small landing.

The moon is not full but it’s enough to provide him with enough illumination.

Afraid that his mother will scare Chan away or maybe try and threaten him, Minho speeds down to grandma’s house, eyes peeled and ears focused for any sign of his mother.

When he gets to grandma’s house he needs to take a break, panting as he walks the parameter of the property, sniffing intently. But he can’t sniff his mother out anywhere.

The fear and anxiety abates a little but Minho is still not satisfied.

Quietly he steps out into the clearing, heading for the small home and making his way to the window of Chan’s room.

Carefully he stands on his hind legs, not quite able to see into Chan’s bedroom window. But if he paid close enough attention he could hear him breathing.

Chan was all right. He was just sleeping.

He didn’t sense his mother anywhere.

He sniffs around just to be sure and heads back to the woods. Minho is not surprised that his mother is at the pond, almost as though waiting for him.

I’m not sorry Minho tells her.

She doesn’t say anything.

Minho shifts back and crouches down at the edge of the pond opposite his mother.

‘He’s my best-friend,’ Minho tells her, ‘He’s the only one other than dad.’

She looks at him from across the pond, eyes unblinking.

I won’t help you she tells him, her tone suggesting that she won’t help him when Chan betrays him or something.

You never have he wants to say but his mouth stays shut. And maybe his eyes said it all because his mother scowls, looking away, breathing out heavily.

‘Just because you don’t understand it, doesn’t mean it’s wrong,’ Minho says carefully. ‘I don’t understand it sometimes, but I’m not scared. Never of him.’

His mother pauses as she stands up, not quite looking at him. And then without saying goodbye, she turns and leaves.

But in a way, she never really was there, so this farewell, much like the others, never really felt much like anything maybe other than some relief in a way.

Minho shifts and makes his way back home.

He’s not surprised that his dad is waiting for him at the back, waving around an electric mosquito bat and a small lamp beside him.

He gives Minho a small smile as he waits for him to get closer.

‘Did you go see Chan?’ he asks.

Minho curls up next to his dad.

‘All good?’ he asks softly, patting his head.

Yes.

They stay outside for a while longer before Minho’s dad yawns and they head inside.

His mother’s things are gone- the rolled up mattress gone from the floor too, everything has been put back to how it was with him and dad, like how it always has been, built around them, for them.

Minho curls up close to his dad again, keeping his back to him as he faced the door to protect his dad, and knowing his dad would protect him back.

The next day Minho gets ready to go meet with Chan as usual but he first approaches his dad.

‘Can I take some plums?’ he asks quietly as he sets down their breakfast.

‘Yeah,’ his father smiles, ‘Let’s go pick some?’

Minho nods.

Minho selects the best of their plums, careful to make sure they didn’t have any worms or insects or bird pecks or anything. They were all perfect.

He was going to have to apologize to Chan for not just his mother freaking him out, but also for his own behavior. He still doesn’t understand the emotions that were in him when his best-friend called him cute.

There were so many emotions that he didn’t know the words to. And this was one of them again.

He was embarrassed yes, but it wasn’t just that.

Minho feels a sense of weird awkwardness settle over him as he approaches their spot. Chan is of course waiting for him, he can hear him before he sees him, knows he was fidgeting a little, waiting for Minho.

Chan turns around at once when Minho steps into the clearing. Minho walks over to where Chan was sitting and his best-friend opens his arms towards him.

Relief at seeing Chan pushes past everything else for now, so Minho walks over to him, head still a bit lowered, and allows Chan to pet him for a while before looking up to bump their heads together a little.

I’m sorry for being weird.

He places the bag down, nudging it towards him to let him know it was his.

‘Thank you,’ Chan smiles at him before patting the bag he brought with him, ‘I brought your clothes back- I sewed it too! Grandma taught me.’

Minho didn’t think Chan would do this- he didn’t even know he could sew. But he shows him all of the stitches he and his grandmother made.

Minho wants to wear it. It smelt nice. Smelt like Chan’s clothes. So he shifts back and wears his patched up clothes, feeling the neat stitches and patches that were very cute.

‘It smells nice,’ Minho tells him, feeling like he was being hugged by his best-friend like this, ‘Thank you hyung.’

‘I think I can teach you how to sew if you want,’ Chan tells him with a bright excited look.

‘Really?’

If he could sew, it meant his dad wouldn’t need to always do it for him.

Chan nods at once.

‘Dad mends my clothes for me but you and grandma did an even better job,’ Minho tells him happily before patting the stars, ‘This is cute hyung.’

When he shows his dad his neat stitches 2 weeks later his dad cheers, rubbing their heads together.

‘You’re gonna become better than me,’ he laughs, ‘Who taught you?’

‘Chan-hyung, and grandma.’

‘Well, this is excellent,’ his dad smiles before saying, ‘Gonna miss him?’

It’s a lie, but Minho shakes his head.

His dad laughs a little, like he knew.

‘Well, he’ll come back in the winter won’t he?’

Minho nods.

‘Then you can show him how much you’ve improved then,’ his dad tells him.

Minho can definitely do that.

You might fight with your best-friend, but sometimes you have to fight because it’s worth it.

Minho is excited.

They would go foraging for chestnuts today. Minho loves the smell of roasting chestnuts and they were rather easy to find in the snow unlike other nuts and cool treats they could find foraging. The spiky coats were really fun to dry and burn for barbeque too because according to his dad and a few of the uncles who helped at the farm it made the meat tastier too. Minho isn’t too sure about that but he guesses it does.

Chan is always worried that Minho might be cold but right now even more so as a teenager, Minho rarely felt cold. Even when he wasn’t shifted he was just in a sweater. His dad also got worried but when Minho started sweating his dad let him be, though always telling him to take a coat just in case. Not wanting his dad to worry about him Minho takes the coat.

This week was going to be a fun week. They were planning on going ice-fishing; Minho heard about how there was a lot of success with fishing this season so he’s excited for that too.

He’s been feeling somewhat better than usual in this particular stage of his puberty he thinks- no weird mood swings yet, and his fur wasn’t falling all over the place thankfully. He needs his fur to be warm and cozy.

Minho greets Chan excitedly when he appears, very thickly dressed. Sometimes Chan’s coat was so thick it made it difficult for him to move his limbs and it made him clumsy which was funny.

But Minho supposes it was colder than most days today, and Chan is instantly worried about him.

‘Are you sure you’re not cold?’ he asks again.

Minho is definitely not cold- he’s excited! He wants to roast chestnuts and eat them!

‘Minho,’ Chan calls after him, ‘Can I at least wrap a scarf around you? I’ll tie it in a way where it won’t bother you!’

Minho doesn’t need the scarf- it would just hinder him anyway and it won’t really help much in making him warm. H needs Chan to believe him when he says he’s not cold. Minho doesn’t like being cold- he would never lie about not being cold! So he leaps out further into the woods, knowing Chan would follow him anyway.

The chestnuts are fun and easy to find- he knows what the trees looked like, what their leaves looked like. Besides, their thick natural spiky covering was easy to spot. They find one of the largest chestnut trees in the area and dig away through snow and icy dirt and layers of compact autumn foliage, managing to find really good hauls.

He loves these moments with Chan. Running around and playing in the woods was fun, reading and laughing over comics was fun too. But Minho really likes these moments where they’re both quiet, doing something together, enjoying a quiet time, just concentrating on something-

He nearly steps on something that definitely wasn’t a chestnut. Minho pauses, staring down at the odd clump he’s uncovered. At first he thinks it might be a weird looking large chestnut but-?

Pausing, he paws carefully at the shape before he feels his entire body freeze up, realizing what it was.

He needs to tell Chan immediately.

Thankfully his best-friend is already looking in his direction and realizes something was up.

‘Got some?’ Chan asks, walking and looking at where Minho was doing his best to indicate with both his paws and his snout.

‘Oh my god,’ Chan gasps, also recognizing what Minho can now smell clearly, ‘Oh no.’

Was it dead? But it didn’t smell dead. Yet. Meaning they could save it-?

Minho shifts, not thinking too much about the cold. They could save this little squirrel for sure.

‘Is it dead?!’

‘I don’t know but you’ll be if you stay like that!’ Chan gasps in shock, quickly taking off his coat to put on top of Minho as he tries to carefully scoop the squirrel- that’s when Minho sees a faint twitch.

‘Oh- it’s alive,’ Minho tells Chan urgently, ‘It’s breathing.’

‘Shouldn’t it be in a tree?’ Chan looks around worriedly, ‘It’s too cold out here in the ground.’

‘Maybe it fell out? An owl took it?’ Minho wonders, also looking around. They couldn’t climb the trees, they were too high and they don’t know which one would work. Many of the holes in the trees were also bird nests and they would just be giving the squirrel to be eaten if it’s an owl nest for example.

‘Wait wait,’ Chan says hurriedly, making Minho wear his coat, pushing his arms through the sleeves and zipping him up. It’s definitely better than being naked and it was definitely cold, especially his feet, but they had a squirrel to worry about! Minho wasn’t going to get sick from just being a little cold it was fine!

Chan has clearly thought of everything. He takes out some hand-warmers from inside his pocket and puts them inside his beanie.

‘Here, put it here,’ Chan tells Minho.

Quickly pushing his sleeves up Minho carefully scoops the little creature up. He thought it was a squirrel, but maybe it was a different kind of rodent?

‘A squirrel?’ Minho asks Chan in case he recognized it.

‘I think so,’ Chan nods, ‘I think we should take him to grandma and ask what to do.’

Minho thinks so too.

‘I think you should shift back,’ Chan stops him before they can start heading back, ‘Or you’ll be too cold, and you’ll hurt your feet.’

‘Your coat is warm though,’ Minho insists, ‘I want to hold the squirrel.’

He found the squirrel. This was his responsibility. He had nearly stepped it!

‘Minho,’ Chan tells him firmly, frowning and using his big-brother tone, ‘If you get hurt it won’t be nice- we’re not that far, once we get home you can change into my clothes and hold the squirrel then.’

Minho wants to argue, annoyance prickling at his skin. Minho really didn’t like it when Chan used his big-brother tone on him. Chan wasn’t his big brother and Minho wasn’t his younger brother. He wasn’t Yongbok. So Chan can’t tell him to do or not do things just because he was older. They were best-friends, not brothers.

But Chan is right.

Bare foot on the snowy icy ground was a bad idea for his feet. He wants to be able to play and hang out during their shorter winter break and if he cuts his foot it’ll be annoying. So he takes off Chan’s coat, not wanting to tear it as he shifts, still annoyed though.

Chan wears the coat again before carefully handling the beanie and squirrel and they hurry back. Minho sticks close, nosing a little at where Chan was holding the squirrel but they never stop.

They reach the back garden and almost as though Chan could read his mind he says warningly, ‘Don’t shift yet-!’

But Minho shifts- they don’t know how long the squirrel was out in the cold, they needed to bring it to safety and make sure it wouldn’t die!

‘Minho-!’ Chan calls out after him, annoyed.

But Minho is annoyed too. This was important! Minho knocks hurriedly on grandma’s door and by the time Chan gets to the back porch, panting a little in the cold, grandma opens the door and quickly ushers them inside.

Inside where it’s warmer they explain what the beanie had and Chan hands it to him before rushing out of the kitchen and bringing back clothes for Minho to wear.

Minho pulls on the pants and shirt as grandma finds an old shoebox and still keeping the squirrel inside the beanie, places it inside, making sure it had some hole for allowing air to come in for breathing.

She also places a heavy book on top of the box. As it was a wild squirrel, it could be feral and a bite would be really bad according to grandma.

Now that the squirrel was okay Minho looks over at his best-friend and knows he’s upset with him. This makes Minho upset too.

Grandma looks at them both, not really looking at each other, both frowning a little, still a bit breathless from all that running.

‘Minho-yah, why don’t you wash up hm?’ grandma tells him, ‘Use the hot water on the tap okay?’

Minho nods, apologizing to her for making a mess on the floor, slightly muddy footprints on the tiles. He would clean that up once he was clean too.

He sighs to himself. This didn’t feel nice at all.

But Minho can’t help but feel he was right. He knew himself. He knew how cold he could get without worrying. Chan was there! Minho knows he’ll be all right. He wouldn’t do something risky, he knows he can’t get badly injured or hurt. He knows his limits. But sometimes Chan made him feel like he didn’t.

Was this because he was younger that Chan thought Minho didn’t understand some things? Maybe there were things he didn’t understand, but he knows himself. Minho knows his limits. And he didn’t do anything to push that today.

He returns, all clean and dry and Chan goes to wash up too, his head lowered too, not looking at Minho.

They’ve never fought before. They had some small arguments but it was never serious. They always quickly apologized and made up. Also Chan was never mean to him ever, and Minho would never want to say or do anything that would hurt Chan, his best-friend.

So all of this was new to Minho.

He doesn’t think he’s done anything wrong, but he feels bad.

He’s seen his classmates argue and fight but Minho has never really argued over something with a friend.

‘Minho-yah,’ grandma says gently, ‘Come here come here.’

Minho makes his way to grandma, head low. If he shifted his ears would he down flat, tail between his legs. But like this head is low, hands in loose fists grabbing at Chan’s shirt.

‘You’re okay? You’re not hurt anywhere?’ she asks him, checking his hands and pointing at his feet.

‘I’m okay,’ he says quietly, ‘I’m not hurt. I know I shouldn’t get hurt, I – I know my limits.’

‘That’s good,’ grandma nods, ‘Chan also knows that.’

Minho looks away.

‘Thank you for trusting me, thank you for trusting Chan,’ grandma tells him, surprising him a little with what she was saying, ‘But it’s still daylight- and even if people don’t really come here, it was still a very risky thing to do Minho-yah.’

Minho bows his head even more.

‘Chan’s biggest fear is not just you getting hurt, but he’s worried what will happen if other people saw. Not everyone can be trusted right? It’s unfortunate, but not everyone can be trusted.’

Minho knows that with a sort of painful understanding.

‘So when you ran like that, he was scared for you,’ grandma explains.

Minho understands that. It was dumb, he’ll admit.

‘I’ll do better,’ he says quietly.

‘Good boy,’ grandma pats his head. ‘I also wanted to tell you that Chan really cares about you and-.’

‘-but he can’t tell me what to do,’ Minho frowns, fiddling with the end of his, well, Chan’s shirt. ‘He’s not my brother.’

‘That’s true,’ grandma nods, ‘But that’s not what I’m telling you Minho-yah.’

‘Sorry,’ Minho says quietly.

‘He cares about you, that’s why you can tell him anything,’ grandma tells him, ‘If he says or does something that hurts you or makes you upset, you can tell him. I know Chan would never want to hurt you.’

Minho sighs out at that.

‘Okay? Don’t let small misunderstandings like this become big,’ grandma tells him, ‘If you did something that upset Chan, you would want him to tell you so that you could apologize and do better right?’

Minho nods to that at once.

‘That means you can do the same to Chan,’ grandma smiles before looking at his feet, ‘You need socks.’

She gets up and goes out of the kitchen for a while, leaving Minho alone for a while.

He softly sighs out, staring at his bare feet for a while.

How would Chan react? He doesn’t want Chan to think he thought he was being annoying. Minho doesn’t think Chan is annoying at all.

Grandma walks back into the kitchen, handing him some socks and patting his head.

‘Eat the eggs Minho-yah, growing boys need to eat eggs.’

Minho nods mutely, pulling on the socks and waiting for Chan to return.

His best-friend comes back, hands very clean, not saying anything but he sits next to him.

Chan always peeled his eggs for him ever since that time when they were younger even if Minho wasn’t shifted.

So when he comes to sit at the table with him he takes an egg and Minho knows it’s for him before he hands it to him.

Minho thanks him, of course he does, quietly and softly.

He doesn’t eat until Chan is done peeling his own egg and they eat together as grandma places some sandwiches down for them.

‘I’m sorry hyung,’ Minho mumbles after grandma leaves, ‘Grandma explained it to me- I was being careless, and I didn’t listen to you.’

‘I’m not angry at you Minho.’

Minho believes him at once.

‘I was worried- I know you didn’t think of it like that, but I was worried,’ Chan tells him sincerely.

Minho breathes carefully, nodding, and trying not to cry.

‘I was worried about the squirrel,’ Minho explains, voice low so it wouldn’t break, ‘It was all alone, and cold. I nearly stepped on it. What if it died?’

‘I was worried about the squirrel too, but I was worried about you,’ Chan tells him softly, ‘If you got hurt I would-…man, I’d be so upset, it would be my fault.’

‘If I got hurt it would be my fault,’ Minho tells him, ‘It’s not hyung’s responsibility.’

‘Maybe not,’ Chan admits, ‘But I still want to protect you. You’re my best-friend, I don’t want to see you hurt.’

It makes him feel funny- not in a way where he wants to laugh, but in a way he doesn’t know how to describe. He doesn’t know the words for it just yet.

‘I know you can take care of yourself, I’m not saying you can’t,’ Chan says quickly, ‘And I’m sorry too Minho-yah, for making you feel like you couldn’t explain yourself to me- it was really uncool of me to be like that.’

Minho doesn’t know what to say- he’s surprised at Chan’s words.

He’s always had to explain everything he’s done- especially when his mother was involved. He’s always had to have some sort of reasoning even if his dad tells him he doesn’t have to. And now Chan was telling him the same thing- he was even apologizing to Minho.

‘I was being a dick,’ Chan says with a guilty smile for using a bad word in front of Minho. He always tried to censor himself a little which was funny because Minho thinks he knows around the same as Chan. It makes him giggle a little.

‘And I’m sorry for that,’ Chan tells him sincerely. ‘I will always listen to you.’

‘I’ll also listen to you,’ Minho replies eagerly, extending out his pinky, momentarily wondering if Chan wouldn’t want to promise him something so serious and grown-up.

But Chan immediately links their pinkies together. He also leans down a bit to bump his head against Minho’s.

Minho knows this emotion, he can name it.

Some of Minho’s earliest memories from his childhood were a bit of a mess- a blur in senses, sights, smells. He does, however, specifically remember the first time his father had given him a hand-warmer.

He had felt quite cold and his father had taken one out of his pocket and given it to him.

It was so warm, perfect in his hands.

It didn’t make all of him warm; but it made him feel like he could now do more. Like he had the courage to move forward, like he could brave the cold.

And that’s what being with Chan felt like.

He might not have been able to really put it into words at just 8 years old, but it was a fact that cemented into his little heart, cherished and nurtured.

No love was perfect, no love was going to be perfect; that was something Minho knew from an early age.

But with Chan, ever since he met him, it was just like that hand-warmer.

So when Chan smiles at him, holding his pinkie finger out in a promise, Minho knows that not only had he found his best-friend, but also his shelter, his resting place, and his home.

*