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The party had broken into the vault beneath Sorcerous Sundries, in search for the Annals of Karsus. If they were to have any hope of understanding the artifact strong enough to control an Elder Brain, this was it. As the team split up into groups to search for the tome, Taverin led Shadowheart to the closest door and stepped inside, with a wandering eye and caution afoot.
The paladin scanned the room, met with the sight of stacks and stacks of books of all sizes. "Okay, let's search in here. Fuckton of books, good gods."
"I'll search the left side, you search the right?", Shadowheart asked. There were a lot of books, but this should go quickly if they divide and conquer.
Taverin nodded, taking to the left side of the room and crouching by a pile of books. She began removing them one by one, studying the covers quickly. No, too boring. No, way too ornate. No, that one just has a picture of a dick on it. Are these sex spells? I'm taking this with me.
"What would an ancient tome of unknowable knowledge even look like? What color do you think it'd be?"
Shadowheart raised an eyebrow. Color? "I really wouldn't know. It should just say the title on the spine,” The cleric called over her shoulder. That's not it. Nor that one.
Taverin froze. She held up a book, studying the cover decorated with leaves and branches, and turned it to look at the spine. This makes no fucking sense to me. I don't think I can hide this anymore.
"So... does this look right?" She held the book up to Shadowheart, a knowing look of guilt and shame on her face.
Shadowheart turned behind her, studying the cover. " 'The Tragic History of the Wise Magister' ? No, it's called 'Annals of Karsus' ."
"Oh..." Taverin sat the book down dejectedly, dropping all her weight to fully seat herself on the floor. "Can I tell you something? And have you promise not to laugh?"
Shadowheart raised an eyebrow inquisitively. "Taverin... Do you know how to read?"
The paladin stared down at the floor in silence. An overwhelming wave of shame washed over her, not wanting to look her lover in the eyes, and she hoped the silence was a strong enough answer. She's going to think I'm stupid. And I am so fucking stupid.
Shadowheart walked over to Taverin and put her hand on the half drow's shoulder. "Look at me. You are not any less for the things you can't do."
Taverin turned her head towards Shadowheart's voice, but didn't lift her gaze from the floor. "I'm sorry, I'm not going to be much help here. I thought the book would be nice and obvious, maybe in a glass case. I didn't expect them all to be strewn about like this."
Shadowheart looked around the room, noticing spare quills. She took one and ripped a page out of a book, writing the title on it. "Here. The title looks like this."
Taverin took the paper, studying the sharp lines and curves of each letter and nodding in understanding. "Okay. I think I can do this. But, Shadowheart?"
"Yes?", she responded. Her large, green eyes filled with a soft feeling.
"...When we get back to camp, will you teach me? I know its a big ask, but... I haven't told anyone else."
"I can try. I'm not much of a teacher, but for you I'll do my best."
Taverin smiled softly, placing a soft kiss to Shadowheart's cheek as she stood to resume their search. She sifted through books in silence, comparing the scrawl on the spine of each to the note Shadowheart had given her, until a loud shout was heard from the vault across the hall. "Looks like Wyll found it. Wanna go see what it looks like, love?"
Shadowheart went towards the entrance of the room and held her hand out in front of her. "After you."
Taverin stepped through the door, making her way to the other side of the hall. A part of her was still ashamed, but she was deeply touched by Shadowheart's discretion. And she found herself looking forward to their lessons.
- ● ● ● ●
As they returned to the Elfsong Tavern tome in hand, Taverin quickly shed her armor and donned her usual clothing consisting of a simple shirt and pants, as well as a long overcoat. She sat cross legged in the middle of the side room, pushing the large, ever present hookah out of the way as she awaited her lover.
Shadowheart made her way to where Taverin was seated, several books under her arm. She placed them down and sat across from her lover. "Alright. I have a couple of books that should help us. Now I have to ask, from 1 to 10, how much can you actually read?"
Taverin sat in silence for a moment, pondering the question. "Uhh... is there a number lower than one?"
Shadowheart smiled softly. Poor thing... "It's alright. The best place to start is the beginning, or so Wyll always says. We'll start with the letters." Shadowheart opened the first book, which contained all the letters and pronunciations for the Common language. One by one, she went through them with Taverin, having the paladin repeat after her.
As Shadowheart pointed to each letter, Taverin repeated their names as best she could. Learning all the different sounds a single letter could make in different words was confusing, but as the night dragged on, she began to understand. The fact that Shadowheart hadn't laughed at her, hadn't scoffed at her, and had taken the time to procure a book for the sole purpose of teaching her filled her heart with the warm swell of adoration. "Hey, hand me a paper and a quill? I think I wanna try writing something."
Shadowheart passed her quill over to Taverin. "Nice and slow. Let your wrist do the work."
Taverin nodded and took the quill into her hand. Holding it with her whole fist much in the way a child would, she dipped the quill in the ink and began to write, tilting her body away from Shadowheart in an effort to hide her chickenscratch. "Its a surprise, but I think I've got this. You ready?"
"Let's see it then."
Taverin offered a nervous smile, turning the paper around for Shadowheart to see.
'I am TaveRiN. I lovE yoU.'
Shadowheart was surprised to actually feel her eyes water. It looked awful, and several of the letters were backwards, but it was the first thing Taverin ever wrote. The first thing she could think of writing was that she loved her. "It's perfect."
A wider smile spread across the paladin's face, admiring her handiwork on the page with pride. "I did that. I wrote something! Here, you can keep it. Its for you." Taverin dipped the quill once more and drew a shaky heart in the corner. Beaming with joy, she handed the paper to Shadowheart.
"I will treasure it always." She allowed herself to stare at it a while longer, a single tear falling down her cheek. "I really do love you, you know."
"You... you do?" Taverin looked genuinely surprised to hear it. It had been Shadowheart who admitted her feelings first, but Taverin had always assumed her own affections had dawned on her much too quickly.
Did I just?.. "I... I do. I can't ever remember feeling like I do when I'm with you."
The half drow moved quickly front her seated position, leaning forward to pull Shadowheart into a soft kiss. "I can't either. You make me feel... like anything I could have forgotten never would've mattered anyway. You helping me with this, something a toddler should be able to do, means the world to me."
“I guess I'm a better teacher than I thought. I think we've earned a break, don't you?"
"Oh, definitely. I feel like my brain is melting. If it's okay with you, could we practice a bit each night? I want to get better, so I won't be so..." Taverin hesitated a moment. There were so many words to describe the way she felt. Stupid? Embarrassing? Ashamed? No one single word encompassed the emotions properly enough.
"You aren't stupid. You're reckless and you don't always think, but you're far from stupid."
Shadowheart's words meant a lot to Taverin. She felt a tear threatening to drop from her eye, reaching up to wipe it before it fell. "Thank you. I never told you because I was scared you'd think I was beneath you. You never wondered why I'd always hand every book or note we found to Atris?"
"Truthfully? I sort of expected. I don't judge you for it, Taverin. I never would."
Taverin sighed, sitting back onto her cushion and staring at the floor. "The worst part is I don't know if I just forgot how to read, or if I never learned. I wouldn't be surprised if it was the latter, to be honest. Once I get good enough, I want to be able to write you at least one note every day. Something just for you, so you know I'm trying."
Shadowheart reached over, setting a gentle hand on the paladin’s knee. "I look forward to it. Until then, I'll gladly help you for as long as you need it."
Taverin smiled, reaching for the thinnest book in the stack. Judging by the colorful illustrations lining its pages, she guessed it was a book for children. "You get some rest, love. It's been a long day. I'm going to be up a bit, so I'm gonna try and see if I can finish this before first light."
Moving to stand, Shadowheart looked down at her lover with a proud smirk. "Just be sure to get some rest yourself. We can't have you half asleep in battle."
"If I've learned half of what you taught me, I should get plenty of sleep. I'll see you in the morning?"
As Shadowheart left, Taverin stood and walked over to her bed, flopping down onto it as she opened the first page of her book. Pouring over its contents, she read and reread it until sunlight began to pour into the room. But she didn’t mind. She could read, albeit slowly. And that was worth losing some sleep over.