Archive of Our Own

The victim had been found comatose in the middle of the kitchen floor. Janus looked over the gruesome photos in the police file, at how the woman's face resembled a mashed plum. Lucky for him, the perp had been very .... very stupid. Not only were his fingerprints all over the crime scene, but he made a series of questionable Google searches right after the assault. Clearly panicking and trying to figure out how to cover his tracks.

Janus scribbled down some notes for his opening argument. Flipped over to another page in the police report. His eyes burned, the exhaustion of the case weighing deep in his bones.

"Papa?"

This was exactly why Janus did not take his work home. He immediately whipped the photo facedown. "Yes?"

His daughter, a beautiful two year old named Estelle, waddled up to him clutching a stuffed Totoro. "Papa, hi!"

"Hello, darling."

Estelle beamed and Janus' heart melted. She attempted to crawl into his lap, but her little legs made it difficult, so Janus picked her up and she sat down, squishing Totoro to her chest. She looked at him seriously. "Papa, no workin'."

"You're absolutely right." He pushed the documents further away, in case she decided to reach for them. "No more working."

She grinned. "No workin'!"

"That's right. What do you want to do?"

"Walk." She started wiggling in his lap. "Papa, walk."

Estelle could not speak in full sentences yet, but Janus got the gist of what she wanted. "Okay, let's go."

"Let's go," she repeated, bright and happy.

The living room was right outside of his office. Janus stood up with Estelle balanced on his hip and shut the door behind him. 

A colorful floor mat spread out in front of the couch, covered with blankets, plush pillows and toys Estelle had been playing with. There was a plastic table with a fake tea set off to the side, and her favorite movie, My Neighbor Totoro, was playing on the TV.

It was a drastic change from his office, going from low lighting and a mahogany desk to rainbow unicorns and whimsy. But Janus had always been good at juggling, and believed that was partly why he was so good at his job.

Estelle's sippy cup was empty on the mat—she'd been drinking it while watching TV before she came to find him. He moved it aside and plopped down onto the floor with her.

"So," Janus said. "What did you want to do?"

Estelle pressed her tiny hands to the scar on his face. Her eyebrows furrowed into a serious expression. "Owie. Papa, owie."

"It's okay, darling. It doesn't hurt."

"Owie," she insisted seriously. She leaned forward and kissed him on the cheek. "All better!"

Janus, ridiculously, felt himself getting choked up. He laughed a little. "Yes, all better now." He took her tiny hand in his and kissed her open palm. "Thank you."

"Thank you," she repeated. She turned around and handed him the bucket they used to play Acorn Soup. "Soup, Papa! Soup!"

The game came with recipe cards to follow, but Estelle was happy grabbing random tokens and throwing them into the bucket. She liked it when Janus stirred everything together, making her giggle and clap. 

He heard the sound of the front door opening, signaling the arrival of his eldest daughter, Summer, and his husband.

"Papa!" Summer cried, barreling into the living room like a marathon runner at the finish. She tossed her backpack on the floor and dove on top of Janus' back, knocking a notch of air from his lungs.

"Oof!" 

Her weight pushed his chest flat against the play mat. Estelle squealed in delight, finding it hilarious, and leapt onto him too.

"I'm getting too old for this," Janus wheezed, which just made the girls laugh even harder. 

He pushed up slowly onto his hands, causing Estelle to gently roll off of and land unharmed onto her butt. Summer wrapped her arms around Janus' neck to keep herself from slipping off as he moved to a sitting position. He choked a little, adjusting her arms so they were around his shoulders instead.

"How was soccer practice?" Janus asked her.

"Great! I scored a goal!"

"That's outstanding."

Summer peered at his face to grin at him. She was missing a front tooth, and Janus thought it was so endearing. Sunshine had lightened her brown hair, tied back into a ponytail, and she was still in her soccer uniform, legs long and coltish. 

Logan stepped into the room and set his messenger bag on the couch.

"Daddy!" Estelle came trotting over, lifting her arms over her head. "Daddy, daddy!"

Logan picked her up. "Hello, Ellie. How are you?"

But Estelle was already distracted. She pointed at Logan's face. "Glasses," she said. "Daddy, glasses."

"Yes, I am wearing glasses. Very good."

"Hair." She patted the top of his head. "Nice hair."

"Nice hair, yes."

"Nose." She poked the nose in question. "Daddy, nice nose."

"Thank you. You have a nice nose too."

He kissed her delicate, tiny swoop of a nose, and Estelle giggled. He set her down and she scampered away to play with the tea set. Summer slipped off of Janus' back to join her, grabbing some Squishmallows off the floor and setting them down onto the chairs, making Estelle coo with excitement.

Janus lifted onto his feet and brushed himself off. "How was your day?" he asked.

"It was full of brain matter and brain fluid." Logan loosened his tie around his neck. "How was yours?"

"Considerably less gross. I'm going to check on the slow cooker, do you mind watching them for a minute?"

"Of course."

Janus nodded and trekked into the kitchen. He was making parmesan chicken, one of Summer's favorites. It looked like it only had about ten more minutes of cooking time. He added some mozzarella cheese on top when Logan let out a scream that made Janus' heart leap into his throat, followed by a clatter.

"Janus! "

The pure fear in his voice had Janus dropping everything and sprinting into the living room. 

A pink chair was knocked over and Logan was on the ground, hand over his heart. Summer pretended to sip her tea calmly at the table, while Estelle waddled around Logan, shouting, "Owie! Daddy, owie!" She patted her own butt for emphasis. "Owie, butt!"

"Logan, what's wrong? Are you hurt?"

"No." He latched onto Janus' outstretched hand and pulled himself up. "Apologies, I didn't mean to make such a fuss. I was just ... surprised." 

"Surprised about what?"

Logan seemed to have no words and gestured helplessly to the teapot. Janus turned, but there was nothing out of the ordinary about it. 

He lifted an eyebrow. "Is it decaf?"

"No."

"An unfortunate symbol in your tea leaves then?"

"No. Just open it."

Summer lifted her chin. Now Janus was very intrigued. He picked up a plastic chair that was much too small for him and slowly sat down across from his eight-year old daughter, who maintained eye contact and held herself with a spine of steel.

"Summer," Janus said. "What am I going to find in here?"

"Sugar."

Janus lifted an eyebrow. Carefully, he lifted the lid off of the teapot and looked straight down.

Instantly, he closed it. 

"Summer," he said, trying to keep his voice calm. "What is this?"

"Sugar."

He gave her a very pointed look. "Summer. That is not sugar."

"Yes, it is. It's what I named her."

"You named—" Janus cut himself off. Took a deep breath. Counted to ten. "Summer, where did you find her?"

"By the soccer field."

"I see. Can you tell me how Sugar managed to travel from the soccer field and into your teapot?"

"I put her in my backpack, and then I put her in the teapot."

"Why?"

"Because she was really nice and friendly. She let me pick her up, and I thought she would want to have tea, so I brought her inside."

Yes, well that was quite sensible for an eight-year old. He lifted the lid and peeked inside the teapot again. A writhing, dark snake moved about with yellow stripes down its spine and two on each side. Definitely a garter snake.

"Snake!" Estelle cheered. "Snake, snake!" 

She reached for it and Logan immediately scooped her up, setting her on his hip. She squealed and waved her arms about, but was completely out of reach. "Summer, I am afraid we cannot allow you to keep a wild snake in the house."

"I thought you might say that. That is why I have weighed the pros and cons."

"Pros and cons?" Logan repeated, flabbergasted.

"Yes." And with that, Summer whipped out a pile of flashcards.

Logan sucked in a breath.

Janus stifled a snicker. He leaned back in the chair. "This is your doing," he whispered.

"My doing?" Logan whispered back. "There's a live snake in a teapot. That sounds like your doing."

"Ahem, " Summer said, in a way that was so much like Logan, that it made Logan instantly stiffen. 

Janus smiled. "Apologies, dear. Do go on."

"Thank you." She pulled out a notecard. "Number one, garter snakes are very nice. Number two, they are not slimy. Number three, they are pretty and come in all sorts of colors. Number four, they probably won't bite. Number five, they have live births."

Janus was surprised. "Really?"

"That's what my book said."

"And the cons?" Logan sighed.

"She can be kind of smelly."

Smelly was an understatement. Garter snakes produced a foul-smelling musk when they felt threatened. Clearly, Sugar was not a fan of being inside of the teapot. 

Logan sat back down at the table. He picked up one of her flashcards, clearly impressed. They each only had one or two words scribbled on them in Magic Marker.

Estelle wiggled until Logan set her down. She wandered off, suddenly distracted by something Totoro was doing on the TV.

"Summer," Logan said, keeping his voice gentle but firm. "I understand you are quite attached to Sugar, but you need to understand that she is a wild animal. Some species of garter snakes are mildly venomous. A wild snake can bite you. It's also possible she could be carrying parasites or diseases. Furthermore, Estelle doesn't know any better and that could have been very dangerous for her, especially since no one knew Sugar was in the teapot."

Summer wiggled in her chair. "But I didn't leave Ellie alone with her! I was keeping a watch on both of them."

"Just so," Logan said, inclining his head. "Sugar probably misses her home. A teapot is not a good home for a snake."

"I wasn't going to keep her in the teapot," she said, as if it were obvious. "I would get her a nice tank with leaves and stuff."

A tank which they did not have at the moment. Janus reached across the table and took Summer's hand in his. "Sugar is a very nice snake. I can tell you love her very much, but the best way we can show her love is by letting her live outside where she can be happy with her snake friends and family. Okay?"

Summer's shoulders slumped, and she sighed. "Okaaay ..."

Speaking of the devil, Sugar poked her head out of the teapot's spout. A forked black tongue flickered out.

"Snake!" Estelle cheered again. She waddled up to the table. "Snake, snake!"

Sugar, realizing this was her prime moment of opportunity, slithered out of the spout and onto the table. Summer and Estelle shrieked in surprise. The snake shot forward onto the floor, lightning fast, and slithered towards the TV.

Logan picked Estelle up. "Janus," he said.

"I got it."

As much as Janus loved snakes, the last thing they needed was one loose one in their house. He grabbed Sugar from around the middle, and the snake immediately reared its head. It hissed and feigned to strike. 

"Yes, yes, I know. You are very stressed. Come on, off we go."

In his haste to find something suitable, Janus grabbed the bright blue bucket for Acorn Soup, dumping out its contents and placing Sugar inside.

Logan let out a breath of relief.

"I'll be right back," Janus said. He moved into the kitchen and slid open the sliding glass door to make the walk into the backyard.

"Waaait!" Summer hobbled in place in the doorframe, struggling to put her shoes on. "Wait for me! I wanna tell her goodbye."

"Okay," he said calmly. "Don't worry, I'm not going anywhere."

Summer visibly relaxed. She shoved her heel into her other sneaker and slid the door shut behind her.

They lived in the countryside with very few neighbors around, optimal for the snake to find a new home. Janus and Summer crossed the deck and down the steps into the grass. Further along, there was a swing set and a treehouse. Beyond that, a large fence that blocked off a small woodland area with a gurgling river winding somewhere within it.

"Where are we gonna let her go?" Summer asked.

"Near the water's edge." Garter snakes liked to live in damp areas. He turned to look at her. "You can come because I'm with you, but never by yourself. Understand?"

"Yup."

He unlatched the lock to the gate with one hand and walked into the woods. The ground became muddier as they travelled through the trees and closer to the river. Water sparkled and swirled around large rocks, the air filled with the gossiping of bullfrogs. Janus bent down next to a rotting log, and Summer followed suit. The snake writhed around in the bucket, desperately trying to find a way to get out.

"Can I hold her?" Summer asked.

"She's a bit too stressed for that. How about you just talk to her?"

"'Kay." Summer peered into the bucket very seriously. "Goodbye, Sugar. I hope you have a nice life and eat plenty of tiny fish and frogs and other things. You can visit me if you ever get lonely, 'kay?"

The snake hissed and wriggled about. Janus set the bucket down on its side and watched Sugar slither into the grass, zigzagging underneath the log to safety.

On their way back, Summer tugged on the sleeve of Janus' shirt. "Papa, do you think the little fish in the river have a lot of thiaminase?"

"Gesundheit," Janus said.

"No! Thiaminase! " she raved, completely mad. "It's a thing fish can have."

"Like a disease?"

"I don't know. I think it might be a vitamin."

"Oh," Janus said. "Well I'm sure the fish have plenty of vitamins."

A sober look crossed over Summer's face. "If the fish have too much thiaminase then Sugar could die a slow and painful death."

Janus choked. "What?"

"We should kill all the fish in the river," Summer said reasonably. "Then no more thiaminase."

"A fun and wholesome idea, but no, we cannot kill all the fish."

"Not even if it's for the greater good?"

"No. Besides, I'm sure the fish don't have that ... thing anyway."

"But you just said they had plenty of vitamins."

"I meant vitamins like the ones you take in the morning shaped like My Little Pony characters, not something that causes a slow and painful death."

Summer snorted. "Fish can't take My Little Pony vitamins, Papa. Everyone knows that."

"Oh, everyone? Have you asked your sister?"

"She's two!"

"Exactly." The corner of his mouth lifted as he sauntered ahead. "Smirk."

"Ugghh, Papa, don't say smirk ... That's so cringe."

"Um, excuse me? That's rude."

"You know what else is rude? Thiaminase."

"How do you know so many big words?" He reached for her and squeezed her shoulders, making her let out a squeaky, pleased little laugh.

"I don't know! It was in my snake book."

"Did your father get it for you?"

"Duh. He takes me to the library, like, all the time. And he leaves his notecards around the house when he's done with them, so sometimes I steal them and use them as bookmarks."

That explained where some of Logan's missing flashcards went. "Does he know about this?"

"I don't know, probably."

Once they crossed the backyard and returned inside, Janus and Summer joined Logan at the sink, washing their hands while Logan scrubbed the teapot with soap.

Janus waited until Summer finished and bounded back into the living room. "Well," he said. "That was exciting."

"Exciting is a word for it. I almost had a heart attack."

After the girls had dinner and a bath, Logan and Janus tucked them in for stories. Estelle was currently obsessed with a book about a Christmas train, even though it was spring, and asked for it to be read every single night. Usually, Logan, Janus and Summer would take turns reading the pages aloud, but this time Summer wanted to read the whole thing to her herself.

After Estelle closed her eyes and rolled over to fall asleep, they walked Summer across the hall to her room.

Summer crawled into bed and pulled the covers around herself. The mattress sank underneath Janus' weight as he sat on the end, and Logan sat on the edge.

"I'm sorry I brought Sugar into the house without asking," Summer said seriously.

"It's all right," Logan said. "But now we know better, yes?"

"Uh-huh."

Logan raised an eyebrow. She picked at a seam on her quilt. She'd had it ever since she was five-years old, a birthday present Uncle Virgil made for her. She chewed her bottom lip, as if she had something more she wanted to say.

"Was there something you wanted to talk about?" Logan prompted.

"Yeah ..." Summer cleared her throat. "So ... as you guys know, my birthday is in a few months."

"... Yes."

"And I was thinking ... " Summer grabbed a book that was shoved underneath her pillow and presented a page to them. "Maybe we can get this one instead?"

Janus looked at the picture. "That's a red tailed boa."

"Yeah! Isn't it cool? They can get up to ten feet long!"

"That is cool," Janus agreed, "but they can live up to thirty years."

"Actually, they can live up to forty years if they live in a house like ours. Most snakes can live a long time if they're loved a lot."

"Yes," Logan said, adjusting his glasses. "That is correct."

She perked up. "So can we get one?"

"Now hold on. I didn't say that."

"Why not?"

"First of all, that snake is enormous," Logan said. "Second of all, they are a lifetime commitment. And thirdly, a snake like that is much too risky to keep around Ellie."

Summer flipped through some pages in her book. "Okay, how about this one?"

Logan glanced at the page. "That's a cobra."

"Yeah, they're cool!"

"They're also venomous and highly illegal to keep as pets."

A dark smile tugged at the corner of Summer's mouth. "Not if no one else knows about it," she said.

Janus tried and failed to suppress a laugh.

"See? Papa is on board."

"Papa is just joking," Logan said, shooting him a look. "We are not getting a pet cobra."

His daughter threw herself backwards onto the pillows with a loud, dramatic groan. "UGGGH, you never let me have any fun!"

Janus snickered. "I think you've been hanging around Uncle Roman too much."

"Yeah, because Uncle Roman is cool! He has a pet tarantula. "

"Uncle Vee has a pet tarantula. Uncle Roman just tolerates it."

Summer ignored that and sat up against her pillows, opening her book to another page. "How about this one? It's called an indigo snake! They're really pretty and they're not illegal or venomous."

"You're right, it's not venomous," Janus said. "But it does have very strong jaws and sharp teeth."

"We can raise it from a baby and then it will know not to bite us," Summer said reasonably. "I'll train him or her to be really good. That way, it'll only bite people who annoy me—like my math teacher or the president."

Logan tilted his head, as though considering it, and then quickly shook his head. "No, Summer, we can't have a snake that bites people."

"Not even if they're really stupid?"

Janus clicked his tongue. "Well ..."

"No. As tempting as that may be ... we have to be responsible." Logan cleared his throat and took the book from Summer's hands, flipping through it himself. Meanwhile, Janus made eye contact with his daughter over Logan's shoulder and mouthed ehh ... while making the so-so motion with his hand.  

Summer giggled. Logan straightened and turned to look at Janus, who smiled innocently. He narrowed his eyes and returned to the book.

"Most of these snakes listed here are venomous or dangerous," Logan said.

"Yeah, but most snakes are actually really nice and only attack when they're scared or stressed," Summer said. "They're just misunderstood. Like spiders or bats or Britney Spears."

"Even so," Logan said, inclining his head. "We can't have a large, venomous snake in the house."

"So I can get one that's non-venomous and small?" Summer grinned up at them hopefully. "Maybe?"

Logan and Janus exchanged looks.

"... We'll discuss it," Logan conceded. "But no promises."

That was enough for her. She beamed, looking thrilled. "Okay!"

"Do you want to read something before bed?" Logan asked.

"Yeah, I'll read you guys my whole snake book! Then you guys can think about it even more."

Logan actually laughed which made Janus' heart do an embarrassingly warm, fumbley thing inside his chest. They curled together over the book, helping Summer out whenever she struggled to pronounce a practically difficult word. After reading through the book twice, they kissed her goodnight and flipped off the light switch.

✨🌻✨

After the girls were both in bed, Janus picked up any stray Squishmallows off the floor downstairs and threw them into a plastic bin. He helped Logan tidy up the kitchen, made one last sweep for any dirty dishes in the living room, and then went upstairs to get ready for bed.

Janus brushed his teeth in the master bathroom. He heard the clanking of a keyboard in the other room—definitely Logan's quick typing.

He stepped into their bedroom and found his husband in bed already. He'd changed into his pajamas and had his laptop cracked open, casting a ghostly glow over his handsome face.

Janus spoke around his toothbrush. "Wha 're you 'oing?"

"I'm reading about which snakes are the best for beginners."

Janus padded back into the bathroom. Thought about what Logan said while rinsing the toothpaste out of his mouth. Spat in the sink and returned a moment later.

"You said we shouldn't get a snake until Estelle is older."

"I know," Logan sighed. "But I'm thinking as long as we make it clear that the girls are not to handle the snake by themselves, and if we can babyproof the enclosure, then it ... might be all right." He looked up at him. "Do you think Summer is ready for one?"

"She's certainly been reading a lot about them." Janus crossed his arms. "She used the word thiaminase today."

Logan's face twisted with confusion. "An enzyme found in fish?"

"Apparently?"

"It's an enzyme that destroys thiamine by cleaving its molecule," Logan explained. "Thiamine is a water-soluble vitamin essential for the body's energy production and nervous system function."

Thiaminase, thiamine ... "Not confusing at all."

"Why did she bring it up?"

"She was concerned about Sugar getting sick from eating the fish in the river."

"Well, did you tell her that is primarily only a concern with people who keep garter snakes as pets and only feed them fish without taking the proper precautions?"

"Oh, yes because that's a Wikipedia article I've memorized."

"Prolonged exposure to thiaminase can cause neurological problems, seizures and eventually death if not addressed. I'll bring it up to her tomorrow and let her know Sugar will have a variety of things to eat in the wild." Logan snapped his laptop shut and set it aside on the nightstand. "How does she even know what thiaminase is?"

"From a book in the library, apparently." He poked Logan playfully in the ribs. "Sounds like a Logan word if you ask me."

Logan sputtered, clearly flustered, and swatted his hand away. "Ridiculous," he said, his neck flushing a little pink. "I have not named any enzymes." He hesitated and cleared his throat. "... Not yet."

A slow smile spread across Janus' face. "Not yet indeed," he said, not adding what he'd really meant—that Summer picked up on every little thing they did and said. "You should know Summer admitted to stealing your flashcards."

"I'm not surprised. I found my card for basal ganglia and skibidi toilet in her Critter Club book the other day."

"I'm concerned you made a flashcard for skibidi toilet."

"Believe me, so am I," Logan said, deeply unamused. "I still don't exactly understand it. Summer only laughs at my plight."

Janus snorted and changed into his pajamas. He flipped off the night switch and crawled into the bed. He draped himself over Logan and wrapped his arms around his waist, cheek squished against his chest, settling in like a happy lizard bathing in the sun.

Logan's long fingers combed through his hair. It felt ridiculously good. Janus' eyelids started to droop.

"Seriously, what do you think?" Logan murmured. "Should we get her a snake?"

"Mmm ... You want to know what I think?"

"Of course."

"All right." Janus cracked open one, golden eye. "Anything we buy is going to be our responsibility. Summer is old enough to help with some of its care, but the bulk of it would fall onto us. So I guess the question is, are you alright with that?"

Logan sighed. "You're right."

"What was that?"

"You heard me the first time."

"I know," Janus grinned. "But I wouldn't mind hearing it again."

Logan's eyes narrowed without any malice and flicked to Janus' mouth. He heard the mattress creak as Logan shifted down, and Janus leaned up to meet him in a slow, lazy kiss. He got the faintest scent of Logan's mint and eucalyptus shampoo, breathing it in as his eyes drifted shut and warmth bloomed in his chest.

They broke apart, pressing their foreheads together. "You're right," Logan murmured.

Janus felt pleasantly fuzzy and very, very smug. "Thank you."

"Uh-huh."

He rested his chin against Logan's chest and gazed up at him. "So what do you think about caring for a snake?"

"Well, I'm already taking care of one so ... What's one more?"

"Hey!"

Logan laughed, and Janus stuck his tongue out at him. He then realized that probably made him look even more snake-like and stopped immediately.

"Rude," Janus said.

"You're the one who always calls yourself a snake."

Janus coughed. "Anyway," he said, moving the conversation along. "We need to figure out what kind we should get Summer."

"You know a lot about snakes. What do you think the best would be?"

"Hmm ..." Janus thought about it. "Well Hognoses are ridiculously adorable but can be picky eaters. Rosy boas and ball pythons are docile but can be escape artists. Milk snakes are lower maintenance but can be flighty and potentially bitey when they're young. Corn snakes are a good option if you want a snake that's more active and inquisitive. And then there's garters ..."

"A garter snake from a reputable source would probably be less of a commitment than the others," Logan said, thinking out loud. "Most snakes live thirty to forty years, but garters live about six to ten in captivity."

"Good point. We could try that and if Summer does well ... perhaps somewhere down the line ..." Janus feigned an innocent and nonchalant expression.. "... Maaaybe we could get a ball python?"

"Ahh, I see. You and Summer are co-conspirators."

"Absolutely not, and I resent the accusation."

"You behave like this and wonder why our child defaults to trickery."

A mock gasp. "How dare you! Our Summer would never."

"Right, and neither would you. You and all your schemes."

"Isn't my scheming what made you fall in love with me?"

"Well, it wasn't your charm."

"Nonsense," Janus said. "I was dripping with charm."

"Pretty sure that was just rain water."

Janus laughed and groaned at the same time, the sound muffled against Logan's shirt. "You're never going to let me live that down, are you?"

He felt Logan shifting until Janus was inclined to look up at him, his hand falling to the scarred part of his face. Janus automatically closed his eyes and nuzzled deeper into his touch, drawn in by his warmth, by the easy familiarity of being loved.

"No," Logan murmured, and planted a kiss on his mouth. "Never."

Sappy, Janus thought, feeling his heart melt into a helpless little puddle. 

Small, excited footsteps suddenly padded into the room. "Daddy! Papa! Look!" Estelle presented something fat and green clenched between her tiny hands. "Frog!"

Janus and Logan jolted apart like they just licked an electric outlet. They quickly untangled themselves from each other, with Janus getting out of bed and crouching before his two-year old, and Logan reaching for the lamp on the nightstand, flooding the room with buttery light.

He adjusted his glasses. "Estelle, that is a toad."

Estelle glared. "Frog!" she insisted.

"No, frogs are smooth and somewhat slimy. See how it is bumpy?"

"Frog!"

Logan sighed.

"Sweetie, let me see the frog please," Janus said, very alarmed and very confused. It took a bit of coaxing but eventually, Estelle shuffled the poor toad into his hands. "Where did you find this?"

"My room," Estelle said brightly.

"How did ..."

Logan and Janus came to the same conclusion at the exact same time. Their expressions flattened. "Summer!" they called.

Summer trekked into the room a few minutes later, rubbing the sleep out of her eyes. "Ugh, what is it?"

"Care to explain how Ellie found a toad in her room?" Logan asked.

She paled a little. "It, uh ...  hopped in from the window?"

"Nice try, but try again."

"Okay, fine, " she said, caving. "I brought it in earlier for Sugar to have a midnight snack."

Estelle looked deeply troubled. "Snack?"

"Yeah, El," she said, shrugging. "Snakes eat frogs."

Ellie's bottom lip trembled, and her coppery eyes started to get all shiny. "T-they do?"

"Yup!"

At once, Estelle burst into tears. "No! No eatin' Sparkle!"

"Sparkle?" Summer repeated, confused.

"I believe that is now the toad's name," Janus sighed.

"Frog," Estelle hiccupped.

"Yes, dear, frog. I'm sorry." 

Logan hopped out of bed, instinct kicking in, and scooped Estelle into his arms. She shoved her red face into his neck and wept. "No eatin'," she implored.

"No, no, it's all right. No one is eating Sparkle," Logan soothed, and her little body finally softened. She sniffed, holding him tight around his neck as he rubbed measured, perfect circles over her spine.

Summer winced. "I'm sorry, Ellie. I didn't mean to make you cry."

Janus straightened to a stand. "Ellie," he said, his voice soft and careful. "I know you love Sparkle very much, but it's way past her bedtime. She needs to go home now."

Estelle sniffed. "To her Daddies?"

"Uh," he said. "Yes ... yes, exactly. Gay frogs."

Next to him, Logan covered his mouth, unable to stifle a laugh. The sound cheered Ellie up, finally smiling. "Okay. Say bye?"

"Yes, let's go say goodbye."

Everyone moved down the stairs and into the kitchen, where Summer opened the sliding glass door, bringing in fresh night air and the sound of crickets chirping. Janus crossed the deck, moving down the steps and crouching in the damp grass. Logan lowered next to him so Estelle could get a good look.

"Bye, bye Sparkle," she whispered. She patted the toad nicely. "Sweet dreams."

"Sweet dreams," Janus agreed. He opened his hands and watched Sparkle bound away into the dark.

Ellie waved. "Bye!" she called.

"Bye, bye," Logan said. "Now, let's go wash your hands and go back to bed."

"M'kay."

Summer was waiting for them by the door. She closed it behind them once they returned inside, looking very guilty. "I'm, uh ... sorry."

"It's all right," Janus said. "But you can't keep sneaking critters into the house. Understand?"

She pressed one big toe on top of her other big toe, swaying in place. "Yeah."

"Good. Are there any other critters in the house we should know about?"

"No, I only had time to get the toad from the soccer field. Promise."

"All right. Let's go back to bed then."

It took four rounds of Logan singing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star for Estelle to fall back asleep. Summer went to bed without any issue, thankfully. By the time Logan and Janus made it back to their room, they were both exhausted, collapsing backwards onto their mattress, completely spent.

"Well," Logan said after a pause. "I suppose it's good Summer had the forethought to not let the snake starve at least ..."

A startled laugh. "God." Janus scrubbed his hands down his face. "I suppose you're right."

Logan rolled over and pulled Janus flush against him, folding him up in his arms, chin digging into his shoulder. "It could be worse," he said, yawning. "She could've asked us for a dog."

"Perish the thought."