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'You sweet on him?'
Steve has to physically shake his head to unstick his eyes from the kitchen where Eddie is trying to open a bottle of beer on the chipped formica countertop. When he finally lands on Wayne's face, he's staring at the TV and sipping his own beer but his eyes are a little glittery.
'Huh?' Steve asks eloquently.
'I said are you sweet on him?'
'Oh. No. No sir?'
'It's fine,' he drawls, like he's gotta chew the vowels before he can get them out. 'You should know I don't care much about all that.'
All that. All that as in what... dating? gay dating? gay boys dating Eddie? Steve's head hurts.
The movie's ending on the screen and the credits are reflecting in the empty glass bottle Wayne sits on the coffee table. Eddie swears in the kitchen.
'Just you boys be safe. And I don't think I have to tell you if you break his heart I know a few guys who can help me hide even a Harrington. He's real hung up on you.'
Steve gulps a swig of beer wrong as Wayne stands to leave for his room, and clears his throat enough that his 'good night' is at least decipherable if scratchy.
'Wayne go to bed?' It must be minutes later because Wayne's totally gone and Eddie is falling into the couch next to him, passing him another beer.
'Uh. Yeah.'
'Weak old man.' he jostles his knee against Steve's.
A new movie has started on the screen and Steve doesn't recognize it but some guys are throwing some other guy over a warehouse catwalk and into a bunch of empty boxes. It makes him envision himself getting thrown around by whatever mysterious faction Wayne knows from the factory.
Why would he think he was, what'd he say, sweet on Eddie? Because he's over here a lot, or Eddie's at his place? because Eddie is a handsy touchy feely kinda guy and Steve went from tolerating to embracing it pretty fast? He looks over at Eddie who's laughing at something in the blue glow of the screen and he flicks his eyes over to meet Steve's and it's like shuffling your socked feet over the carpet and touching the fridge handle.
And then it's like he really has to leave and talk himself through whatever is going on right now but he's about three and a half beers deep and Robin would absolutely kill him, so he goes to the bathroom instead.
The new Munson trailer has a very yellow light above the medicine cabinet, and it makes Steve look sick. He kind of feels sick, so he splashes his face with some cool water and sits on the edge of the tub. He figures he has a few minutes at least before Eddie starts to get worried.
Why was he freaking out? Because Wayne thought he was gay? That's stupid, that's King Steve behavior and he hadn't been King Steve in years. He wishes he could talk to Robin like right now. He tries to imagine what she'd say, and it mostly sounds like her calling him a doofus and swatting at him but also.
He thinks she'd tell him he was allowed to want to kiss Eddie, if that was what he really wanted. She'd probably say Eddie was a weirdo or that he wasn't Steve's type, but it'd be good-natured. And he would laugh and say 'no way Robin, you know I like boobies', and Robin would say 'maybe you like Eddie's boobies too'.
Now, in the real world, Eddie is at the door, 'Stevie? you good in there?' and Steve's own voice is a little squeaky when he rushes to say 'yeah, be right out'.
When he opens the door Eddie is still standing at the end of the hall, and beneath the mess of his outgrown bangs his eyebrows look worried.
'You good?'
Steve nods, and goes to move past him, but a hand on his shoulder stops him.
'You seem a little freaked, man, and uh. Not to bring it down but it's not. like. Freaked freaked. Right?'
Steve sighs and when he starts to answer he realizes he's also started to cry, which is so embarrassing and it makes Eddie's eyes go superwide, so he says 'no it's not, I promise, I'm just an idiot!' and then tips his forehead against the lapels of Eddie's (soft, worn, probably Wayne's hand-me-down) flannel. Eddie tentatively puts his arms around him in a hug and Steve tries to breath, tries to count them and make them count, but Eddie smells like some kind of musky cologne or deodorant or shampoo and it's kind of all he can focus on.
'Breathe, man, you're okay. I don't know what's wrong but I swear to god we'll figure it out, we always do, and maybe we won't even get all ate up this time, we can like, wear armor or something, or at least a good jacket, zipped up, like-'
Eddie is rambling like Robin does, and it's actually soothing, it's familiar. It's like he can reset his brain to it, like setting a watch, a constant to stabilize to. He kind of zones out for a while until his racing thoughts get under control and he snaps back into his own brain to Eddie's continued rambling and a real and solid headache, feels like a migraine actually. He pulls his head back from Eddie's (now quite damp) shoulder and scrubs at his face. He feels like a little kid, and he's still not sure what started it.
Since the almost-end-of-the-world Steve's been quick to panic, but it's usually not this bad around anyone. And it's not like he had a nightmare, which is something that kick-starts it most of the time.
And now Eddie is looking at him and he's exceptionally worried, his hands are on Steve's shoulders and his head is tilted down so he's looking up at him all sincerely with all that concern and huge eyes and it's like it clicks actually all at once and the micro-reasons for the freak out seem to make sense and also seem so silly because that's what Wayne was picking up on, that connection or the way Steve's heart stumbles over itself or how his breathing picks up a little again and it's like of course, it's... a crush, it's like, it's love, but it's for Eddie fucking Munson, who would have guessed.
So there's this warmth and he can feel his stupid face start to smile and he just knows Eddie knows because Eddie actually does know him pretty well, probably as well as Wayne at least and Wayne saw it a mile away.
Eddie lets out a little huff of breath, like an almost-sigh of relief, and he leans back a little, lets one arm fall while the other hand pats Steve's shoulder in a very 'there there, man' kind of way. 'You feeling a little better? Everything okay?
'Yeah. Yeah.' You'd think he'd be a little more freaked out but he's actually so much calmer now, like his body is telling him 'see, I told you so'.
'Maybe we should both have a glass of water.' Eddie chuckles, pats his shoulder again, moves to the kitchen. His energy still feels all fritzy.
Steve follows him, alight. Like thank god and like fitting in place and buzzing and flying and snoozing all at once. Eddie is talking about a nightmare he had a few nights ago as he fills two plastic novelty takeout cups from the faucet, and the set of his shoulders is still tense but his hands move so smoothly.
They drink their water and watch their movie and Steve crashes on the couch like he has a hundred times before and he wakes up a little before Wayne and way before Eddie, like usual, but this time when he makes a big pot of coffee in the percolator that always feels a little sticky he also starts breakfast.
Wayne comes into the kitchen yawning in an old stained tee shirt with a cartoon cat in it, and Steve's making pancakes at the stove and humming.
'You're up early, kid, y'okay?'
'Wayne I think I am very sweet on him.'
Wayne chuckles at him. 'I told you I knew, boy, I basically gave you my approval. I can kill you, though, and I want you to remember that.'
Steve laughs and puts a plate of pancakes on the table to wait for him where Wayne always sits. As he finishes dressing his coffee, Steve thinks he should remember how he takes it.
'He uh. doesn't know. yet. I haven't told him, he doesn't know.'
'Oh I think he knows, he's not blind.'
'Well why wouldn't he say?'
'I don't know if he believes it. you've met him, you know he's got kind of a kicked dog way about him, gets real down on himself.'
Steve frowns, but it's not like Wayne's wrong.
'He doesn't... believe it?'
'He don't think he deserves much. You should see him get a Christmas gift.'
Oh Steve wants so bad to buy him a gift, a bunch of them, books and little figures and whatever else. Maybe he can change his mind, convince him.
'Anyways you should talk to him.'
'Yeah,' Steve agrees. he just needs to figure out how.
'Talk to who about what?' Eddie comes out of the hallway, hair all over the place, clothes rumpled. it's like he exudes warmth, like there's an aura around him pulling at Steve, like maybe that's what got his shirt all disheveled.
'That's my cue.' Wayne pats the table and abandons his half-eaten pancakes, slurps the rest of his coffee in a big gulp, and goes about getting himself ready for work. Eddie happily sits at Wayne's place and starts working on the rest of his pancakes, and Steve pours his coffee into a chipped mug, adds too much sugar like he likes it.
Steve has a lot to say, and it all wants to come out at once.
He sits across from Eddie instead and chews his own pancakes without tasting them. It's quiet in a nice way, the total opposite of the quiet at Steve's parents table when they're home, and it makes Steve think about sharing a table with Eddie all the time.
'What did Wayne get you for Christmas?'
Eddie chuckles a little at him and spears another piece of breakfast. 'Well, I was still kind of recovering from being dead, so he got me a shit-ton of books, way too many honestly. He said it was to rebuild my collection and give me something to do, but I think he was just being sappy.'
Books. He knew it. 'He loves you. He was telling you he's happy to have you around.'
'I know.' Eddie looks shy but still warm. Lovely.
'We all are, you know. We uh. Love that you're still here.'
Eddie pushes a little frown out, like Steve's being sweet, which of course he is. 'Stevie you're gonna make me cry.'
'Nah, I mean it.' He smiles at him, tries to make it warm, then grabs both their plates and takes them to the sink. Eddie hip checks him away, tells him he'll wash since Steve cooked, so Steve gets to lean against the counter and chat at him while he does, gets to smile and wave at Wayne in unison as he heads out.
'Can I um. Can I talk to you? About something? It's not bad!' Eddie has stopped and is staring at him, completely still, suds still dripping from his hands. 'I promise it's not bad, or well, I guess it could be? But I hope it's not.'
'You're not very convincing, Stevie.'
Steve chuckles, runs his hand through his hair, kind of tries to shake it off. It's nerves but it's good nerves, like a new years countdown.
'Okay so first of all, I don't think I'm. Exactly. Straight.'
'What the fuck.'
'I know! I know, right?' It's adrenaline and bubbly excitement.
'Since when?'
'Since like... now, kind of.'
'Okay.' Eddie gulps, his hands still dripping. He doesn't look as thrilled as Steve feels, he kind of looks shocked, gaunt, like he's gonna pass out.
Steve hands him a dish towel for his hands, tries to decide between stabilizing him and not so his hands sort of flutter like birds before the fall back to his sides. 'I. Can go? Um. I should go.'
'No!' Eddie is loud and it's like he shakes himself awake. 'God, no, I'm sorry. thank you for telling me I'm just. A little caught off guard.'
'How do you think I feel?'
'Fair, okay! Fair. What uh. brings this on?'
'Don't freak out.'
'I won't! Well, I know that's contrary maybe to how it seems, I am kind of freaking out I guess in a way, but I just mean that I won't freak-'
'I think I'm like. In love with you.'
And it's not exactly what Steve was going to say, he was going to start way smaller, but it's not like it's a lie or anything.
'I should sit down.' And then Eddie is slouching against the counter, and then he's sliding down to sit on the cool faux linoleum tile.
'I. Should go! I should go. I'm fucking up.' And it's like panic again, quick as that.
'No, Stevie, I just need a second, I promise, don't leave. Just a second.'
Steve stands in the kitchen, arms at his sides, while Eddie wrings the kitchen towel in his hands (strong and smooth) and stares at the fridge. He tries to stabilize his breathing, wishes he'd waited, wishes he'd told Robin first so he could shake it out of him, wishes he'd left this morning before Eddie woke up and given himself some time, because this was crazy!
'Okay let me get this straight. Haha. You, Steve Harrington, have just decided that you are into dudes and more specifically somehow into me. Is it a prank? Is this like a joke?' Eddie's face is all screwed up, his eyes squinted in confusion.
'No prank, no joke.' Steve kneels down at Eddie's side, takes the poor towel away from him and tosses it onto the counter. 'I am like, stupidly into you, and I'm not good at waiting really, especially not about things like this, especially not since we all almost died like five times. I think used to be better at all this.'
'You used to be better at this.' Eddie still seems a little in shock. 'I'm going mad.'
'No! no you're not, I. Should have done this better, Wayne is gonna get his guys to throw me off a catwalk.'
Eddie laughs at that. 'Is that what he told you?'
'He implied it!'
'Oh my god, that's what you were talking about this morning!' He's jabbing his finger into Steve's chest over and over again now and it kind of hurts. 'Oh my god!'
'Ow! Yeah, kind of it was, it was - can you stop doing that -' he swats at Eddie's hand but it goes right back to pointing, jabbing him bone against bone, '- he was telling me I should talk to you! And-'
'He knew before me!'
Steve catches Eddie's finger mid-jab and grabs his hand in both of his. 'If it makes you feel better I think he knew before me.'
'Oh my god he's such a meddler. That old man is making his own dinner for the rest of his life!'
'No he's not.'
'Anyway is... are you... like... sure? Do you mean it, I guess I'm trying to ask?'
'Of course I mean it. I'm not a very good liar and also why would I lie.'
'That's, again, not very convincing.'
'I can convince you.' he tugs on Eddie's hand so he falls forward a little, and it's honestly pretty smooth, so he mentally pats himself on the back as he completes the motion and pulls Eddie into a hug and shifts his crouch to be more comfortable.
'Oh my god.' Eddie has let his face be smashed against Steve so it comes out all muffled. 'You're so annoying.' but Steve swears he can feel him smile so he feels free to laugh back.
And it is, you know. Sweet.