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Still Breathing

Summary:

MC remembered everything upon being revived. Belphegor had killed her and now she was left to pick up the pieces alone, until Mammon came.

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As a human exchange student in the Devildom, MC was all too aware of her mortality. After one too many attempts on her life by the inhabitants of the Devildom and other students, she found herself accompanied more often than not by the Brothers and if unavailable, Solomon or the Angels. To some extent it was frustrating to be shadowed. She would be remiss to deny that the forced proximity came with benefits and strengthened her bonds and pacts with the siblings. As time passed, MC slowly adjusted to her life in the Devildom, found genuine friendships and because of that she knew they missed their missing link, Belphegor. Agreeing to help the slothen brother escape the attic was easy, keeping her life was not.

 

She wished she could say she didn’t remember what Belphegor did to her, but it was burned into her very soul. The sly grin he had as his hug tightened, her uncomfortable, “Belphie, it’s too tight,” would plague her dreams for nights to come.

 

Belphie’s grip tightened as he grinned, horns sprouting. “Filthy human. I know.”

 

Fear chilled her veins as MC quickly summoned the brothers, pact marks glowing.She felt her neck snap, consciousness veering into a dark oblivion as she heard Mammon and Satan scream. Seconds, minutes, hours were all inconsequential as Barbatos called upon his power and LIlith’s to bring her back. It’s an odd thing to feel your soul become bound to another body, rending someone else’s very existence obsolete. 

 

Clutching at her neck, MC gasped for breath, scrambling across the floor from the brothers and hid behind Barbatos. Staring accusingly at Belphegor she leveled him with a glare. “You killed me,” she whispered.

 

Every brother flinched as Belphegor shrugged. “You’re alive now aren’t you?”

 

Mammon snarled and clutched Belphegor’s cardigan in his fist, horns and tail appearing. “Apologize, now.” While it was comforting to know Mammon would stand against his own brother for her, it didn’t erase the betrayal and cruelty inflicted upon her.


Shakily standing, MC gazed at Belphegor, sniffling lightly as tears welled in her eyes. “All I wanted to do  was reunite you with your brothers and you murdered me.” The brothers flinched again, distancing themselves from the perpetrator. 

 

Lucifer spoke in a tightly controlled voice, addressing her. “MC. Whichever punishment you deem fit, I will bestow. I’m sure Diavolo would allow it.”

 

Shaking her head and beginning to head back to her room from the attic, she responded. “No, I’d hate to prove him right.” She fled and ran to her room, thanking whatever deity who had blessedly didn’t allow the brothers to pursue. 

 

Once in her room, she retreated to the shower, shedding each layer with a broken sob. Once the hot water was beating on her back, she collapsed and let out a wail. Curling into a ball, water sluicing around her, MC continued to scream. She knew, suspected that Belphegor was using her- But to kill her? To make her pay for an entire race's mistakes? At one time she envisioned her and Belphie befriending one another. How foolish was she? The kindness the others had shown her of course wasn’t all encompassing. Water chilling, MC’s breathing calmed and she cleared her now sore throat, sitting in the corner, allowing the shock to her system to subside. 

 

Groaning, MC pulled herself up and cut the shower off. Shrugging on a robe, a gift from Asmodeus, she peered at herself in the mirror. Her hair was mussed, stringy and limp, eyebags present and gaze sunken, thin collar bones jutting out. Raising the sleeves, MC was surprised to see a lack of tattoos. In her fugue state, she remembered Barbatos “sourcing” her from a prior timeline. Breath catching, she quickly shoved the sleeves back down allowing a moment of grief for her, but not her. It made her decision to stay fairly clear cut. Same soul, different body. She couldn’t return home and explain this, even if Diavolo allowed her to remember the time she had spent in the Devildom.

 

Walking towards the dresser, MC grabbed a fuzzy pajama set. Pulling on a well loved black cami over her head, she heard a soft knock on the door. Heart beating frantically she stood on the other side and said in a shaky voice, “Who is it?”

 

A pause and then, “Mammon.”

 

Sighing in relief, MC cracked the door to indeed see Mammon. He was holding out a sheep plushie they had won at the festival the prior week. “I- MC. I just- I’m so sorry,” he gasped out, falling to his knees in the doorway. 

 

Opening the door wide, she pulled Mammon in and closed it behind him, resting a hand on his shoulder. “Mammon, it’s not your fault. Nobody could’ve known what would happen. If anything, it’s my fault for trusting him.” 

 

Mammon gazed at her, eyes glassy with unshed tears, before pulling MC into his lap and burying his face in her shoulder. “I’m so sorry. I came here to comfort you, and here you are comforting me and helping me again! I couldn’t protect you and keep my vow.” She could feel her shoulder dampen as Mammon cried in earnest. 

 

Rubbing his back she shushed him. “Baby, it’s ok. I’m still here and not going anywhere.”

 

Mammon choked and tightened his grip around MC. “I almost lost you. I couldn’t get there in time.”

 

As Mammon’s grip tightened, MC could feel a familiar panic welling within. Wiggling slightly she implored him, “Mammon, I need you to release me.”

 

Gasping, he quickly spread his arms wide, face still tucked into her shoulder. Sparing a shy glance he mumbled apologetically, “I would never do that to you. I'm sorry, I’ll go. I just had to make sure you were okay.”

 

Petting his hair lightly, and settling his arms around her hips, MC shrugged. “Okay? No. Here? Yes.” Standing up, she stood up and held out a hand. After everything she couldn’t imagine being alone. After witnessing Mammon’s visceral reaction and protectiveness for her, she knew resoundingly that he could still be a safe space. “Stay with me tonight?”

 

Mammon grabbed her hand, palm engulfing hers as he pulled himself up and bestowed a brief kiss upon her knuckles. “Only if you want me to.”

 

Pulling Mammon towards the 4 poster bed, she lifted her blankets and slid in, patting the free space. Mammon still looked unsure and was toying with the bottom of his shirt. Eyes softening she spoke. “I think I’d feel a lot better if my first stayed with me tonight.”

 

An ear splitting grin broke across the second born’s face, one she would commit to memory and vow to repeat time and time again. He tugged off his shirt, throwing himself into her bed, tucking her neatly into his side. MC wrapped her arms around him, pressing a fond kiss to his heart as Mammon’s breath caught. Nuzzling her head, Mammon murmured in disbelief, “I thought I lost you.”

 

Nuzzling him back, MC’s grip tightened around his waist as she rolled on top of Mammon, peering down into his stricken expression. Leaning forward she pressed a kiss to his furrowed brows, forehead, nose, cheeks and then finally his lips. Pulling away quickly, she spoke what she knew to be true within her soul. “As long as you’re mine, I’ll never leave.”

 

Fresh tears welled in Mammon’s eyes and she kissed them away, brushing his hair and patting the tufts back into place. As he calmed, MC slid slightly to the side, draping a leg over Mammon’s hip and slung an arm across his chest. She could feel his heart thumping strongly under her arm and looked up to meet his golden eyes. He took a deep breath and spoke with precision and a frightening clarity. “I love you, y’know?”

 

Smiling, MC pulled Mammon’s towards her for another kiss. Nipping at his lips, delighting in the little gasp he elicited, MC licked into his mouth, hand clenching atop his chest. Mammon kissed back, all passionate fervor, tongue caressing hers, small whines erupting from his throat. Finally pulling away, he rested his forehead against MC’s and let out a soft laugh in disbelief. 

 

MC laughed as well and nudged his nose with hers and pecked a final chaste kiss on his swollen lips. “I love you too.”

 

As they settled back into the bed, MC traced freckles on his chest as Mammon complained of being ticklish. “Can you stay every night from now on?”

 

Capturing her hand in his, Mammon nodded and spoke as MC dozed on. “You’ll never be alone again.”

 

And she wasn’t.