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She made mistakes.
A lot of them.
She knows she did. But she can't help it. Every single time she did it well, her mother cheered her on. Things got better. Everybody was happy. Nobody suspected a thing.
Until Mother left.
And she started crumbling.
She knew Mother would leave someday; she expected it, even. She knew Mother would get tired of her and find another family. But she didn’t expect it to hit as hard as it did.
Lila, or rather, her true self; Camille Verdi, used to lie for her mother, Iris Verdi. Her mother was also a sociopath who had multiple Identities, and apparently, multiple spouses.
Camille was the accidental child Iris had with one of her spouses, and she had no idea who it was. So Camille ended up being a child to 17 different fathers, her mother being married to all of them with different Identities. For example, her Australian father, Jave Austin, married a woman, Siada Charles. Siada was one of Iris’s Identities.
This is the tale of one one spouse; there are 16 more to go.
Young Camille fed lies to everyone accordingly, maintaining her mother's facade well. As Jasa, as Savina, as Terry, as rosette, she was the child of 17 different couples. Her mother cheered her on. All until she turned 9. Her mother left her, in the dead of the night, running away to lead another life, with another identity.
Yes. Her mother raised a sociopath, then left her all alone.
Sure, she could lie and cover for her mother, but she didn't. She couldn't.
She wasn't strong enough to do that.
And she wasn't competent enough for Mother. She disappointed Mother.
But she can't help it.
So Lila lies.
Spins tales and tales of an enchanting lifestyle with her silver tongue, happy to live in her castle of lies until she passes away one day. And if her castle crumbles, she proceeds to run away and build another castle of lies somewhere else.
Life was okay.
Then she found Marinette.
She thought she could tell her everything, and she would be accepted for who she was.
But Marinette just had to get in her way.
Too bad now she had to spend her time bullying the poor girl.
Then she was exposed for good.
Life took a down turn again.
Then one day Lila found out about miraculouses.
She thought having the miracle box might be enough to make her mother proud.
Or to alter the fabric of the universe and give her a normal life.
And so she’s in pursuit, running after something that isn't hers, and using identities that were never her own.
She feels alive. She feels like she has purpose. She's happy to live like this.
Even if she knows that the day she finds the Ladybug and Cat miraculouses, she won't be strong enough to remake a world where Mother doesn't exist, or one where she has a normal mother.
Camille loves her too much to do that.
And so she's happy to live like this.
She knows it's wrong, but it's okay.
She's okay.