Chapter Text
"Question number seven? You mean, the one about the Six Hundred Years' War? Uh, I dunno, I'm pretty sure I got that one wrong. All that 'names and dates' stuff just goes in one ear and out the other for me, heh."
If Clara had been listening to the conversation on the other side of the room, she might have found that she related to what Jazz had just said. But she hadn't been listening. Because, that stupid Netherworld history test was already over, right? Why were Jazz and Iruma and Azz still wasting time talking about it, when they could be having fun instead?
None of the others saw it the way that she did, however. So there she stood. In an unoccupied corner of the New Magic Battler room, next to a work bench covered in all sorts of shinies and powderies and liquids in glittering crystal vials. She had come over to this side of the room in the first place because she'd seen some funny green safety goggles and wanted to play dress-up, but that had gotten old quickly, and Iruma and Azz kept on talking. So, once it was clear that nobody was paying attention to her even though she was literally dying of boredom before their very eyes, she'd picked up a beaker and started dumping random ingredients in.
On the other side of the room, Iruma nodded in agreement with whatever Jazz had just said.
"Mine too. Somehow I always get the Shrieking Horde and the Shivering Horde mixed up even though they have nothing in common. I looked it up afterward and I think I ended up writing about the wrong one. And maybe also the complete wrong time period by, um, a few millennia?"
A laugh. "Oof. That's rough. Sucks to be you."
Even though she was looking down at her potion, Clara could imagine the withering, meany-faced look that Azz shot Jazz after that remark. His forehead scrunched, his upper lip curled, showing off a little sneaky-peek of his fang. It was the way that he'd used to look at Clara all the time before he realized that the two of them were besties.
He hurried to smother Iruma in reassurances. "An easy mistake for any demon to make! Don't fret, Master Iruma, I'm sure that you passed the rest of the test with flying colors!"
Iruma didn't sound so convinced. "I guess we'll see..."
The only "flying color" that Clara had ever seen on an exam paper was a whole bunch of red ink, pointing out all of her mistakes. She had to admit, she didn't love that color.
So she would add... the shiny blue powder to her potion instead! And some devi-frog guts...
"Doctor mad scientist Claaa-ra—the prettiest, most genius-est potion inventor— gonna mix up a super-special mysterious elixir—" she sang tunelessly to herself as she sprinkled a few pinches of powder into her beaker. The liquid within transformed from clear to pink in color and started to bubble lightly, and her eyes widened. "Oh wowie, it's doing something!"
"What was that, Clara?" For the first time in a few minutes, Iruma looked over at her.
Oh shoot. If Iruma was looking over at her, then Azz would probably look over at her too, and if Azz saw what she was doing he would probably get mad and tell her to knock it off.
She shifted her body to hide the simmering potion from view. "Nothing! I didn't say a thing, not a peep or a cheep! I'm just sitting in this dusty corner, playing dress-up and not causing any trouble!"
There. That ought to calm their suspicions, she thought.
But her plan backfired. Instead of going back to conversing with Jazz, Iruma touched at Azz's elbow, signaling for him to look at her. "Aw, look. She's wearing goggles. And a smock, like a scientist. Cute."
"As if she had any true respect for laboratory safety," Azz grumbled. But, nonetheless, he pulled out his hellphone and raised it up to take a photo, as he always did.
Iruma clapped his hands together. "Now pose like you're doing something science-y!"
Ordinarily, Clara would have preened under the attention. But ordinarily, she didn't have an elixir with unknown, possibly toxic properties bubbling and brewing behind her back. So instead of striking a pose, she froze.
If she let Azz take one picture, she knew from experience that it would lead to him taking another picture, and then another 'nother, from all different angles and distances and lightings. Having that intense kind of focus on her would mean that he'd for sure see the potion eventually, and then yell at her. So that was a no-go.
But if she didn't let him take a picture, then... he would have fewer pictures of her. And that would be unforgivable! She wanted his 'soulmate memories' album to be full, so full that it made his phone weigh a hundred devigrams or more. And she wanted him to look at those photos every night because he loved her and Iruma so much and wanted to hug them and smooch them!
(Well, maybe the 'smooching' thing was more like her own secret wish, rather than something that she actually believed that Azz thought about. Sure, the three of them said that they loved each other all the time, but Clara couldn't help but privately fear that she was the only one who meant she was really in love with them when she said it.)
(It bothered her sometimes, to be honest.)
But she couldn't think about that right now! She had bigger fish to fly! And for the problem of the mysterious elixir, it was clear that there was only one possible solution:
Make it disappear.
" 'kay! Give me a teeny sec to get ready, though. No peeking!"
Once the boys were looking away, she turned around, picked up the flask of steaming liquid, and chugged it.
Get destructed, evidence, she thought smugly, as she wiped the back of her wrist against her lips.
The potion burned her throat a little as she swallowed it, but only for a second, and then after she'd choked it all down it made her stomach feel tingly and warm. But, in a nice way, like it was full of a hundred glowy-flowy worms! It tasted like scaramel. Sweet but smoky. She sorta wanted to drink another bottle of it.
It smelled like scaramel too. She wrinkled her nose briefly, then tried to relax her face as she turned around. "Okie-dokie, I'm ready!"
___
Clara was right to have been worried about the intensity of Azz's attention. By the time that Azz was through with photographing her, she'd gone through several costume changes and hairstyles and had also roped Iruma in to posing with her.
"I suppose that will do," Azz said finally, scrolling through his photo reel with an appraising frown on his face. "I'll send these on to the pair of you later today, after I've had time to carefully review them and evaluate which ones capture your charm the best. But for right now—Iruma-sama, wasn't there another matter you wanted to discuss with Jazz?"
"Oh, right." The other boy blinked. Clara guessed Iruma had gotten so caught up in their dress-up funtime that he'd forgotten. "Yeah, Jazz, so there's a magical apparatus that our club wants to make, but we haven't quite been able to get any of the prototypes to work. So we thought we'd run it though the New Magic battler to make sure it's theoretically possible. Is there anybody here who knows a lot about making things levitate?"
There was somebody, as it turned out. And before Clara knew it, the conversation had turned all boring and yawny again.
Over the years, she had gotten a little better at being able to sit and listen to this kind of stuff, particularly when their magical apparatuses were involved. Because, their magical apparatuses were really cool! But today, she didn't have the patience. Her stomach was still unsettled from drinking that sketchy potion, and the feeling was getting worse by the minute. Now, both of her guts and all of her muscles felt like they were wobbling around like pudding.
She wanted to go and take a nap. But she also didn't want to be alone, and she knew that since Agares usually left as soon as the bell rang, the Royal One's nap room would be empty at that hour. But, lucky her! She knew of one specific couch somewhere else in the school that was likely to have a bunch of other butts on it.
"Bye bye! Have fun talking about your smarty-pants stuff. I'm gonna go hang out with the game battler!"
"Oh, alright. Bye, Clara. I'll text you when we're done," Iruma said, his voice distracted. Azz was busy diagraming something, and he ignored her completely when she spoke.
Jazz, on the other hand. For some reason, Jazz was suddenly paying her a lot of attention.
"Oh, uh, bye, Clara," he said. He rubbed the back of his neck, his eyes not quite meeting hers as he spoke. His whole face looked sorta... well. If it were any other demon, it would look like he was blushing. But Jazz was way too cool for that, right? Maybe he had a wicked phase coming up. Or maybe he was feeling sick... could he have just drunk an ucky potion too?
His voice had a hint of squeakiness when he spoke again which usually wasn't there. "You know, Clara, you could stay if you wanted. I bet you'd be able to help a lot. 'Cause you're so creative, you know? And smart."
"Aw, thanks!" she said, as both Azz and Iruma looked over at the other demon, bemused. She was mad at them for a moment—what, didn't they believe that she deserved nice compliments? Even if said nice compliments were not 100% grounded in reality? But she knew how to be the bigger person, so she brushed that feeling aside. "Maybe some other time. But right now, I've gotta bounce."
With that, Clara waved a final goodbye and struck off down the hall.
It was getting late in the day, so nobody except Lied was left in the game battler's room. Well, Lied, a case of energy drinks, and a spot where the air seemed weirdly solid and also kind of nervous and sweaty for some reason?
"Fluffy-kun! Soi-Soi! Hi!" She waved at them cheerfully and then stepped into the room, turning to close the door behind her. "What'cha playing? I wanna play too! Controller-three me, please!"
Then, she looked over at the screen and realized that they were playing a two-person fighting game. Oops. "Oh, never mind! I'll wait and play the winn—"
Before she could finish her sentence, both of the other demons jumped to their feet and hurried over to where she was still standing by the door. Each of them pressed a controller into her hand.
On the screen, the two players' colorful avatars lurched wildly and then stilled, as if they'd called a temporary truce.
To her right, Lied flashed her a mischievous smile, and then pushed his shiny yellow hair back behind his horns. His cheeks were as pink as if he'd just flown eleventy hundred laps around the school, Clara noted. The game he and Purson had been playing must have been really invigorating. "Nah, don't worry about it! I was just about to take a break anyway. I was getting sick of slaughtering Purson each round. Did you know that I'm dimensionally ranked in this game? Fourth place in the Netherworld. I'm basically a celebrity in certain corners of the deviternet. But I'm humble about it, you know?"
"Cool cool!" And it was cool! Sure, Clara was already besties with a bunch of famous people running the gamut from pop idols to warlords to scientists to political bigwigs, but having another celebrity in her corner never hurt! "But, why aren't you first place?"
Lied blinked, as if taken aback by her super reasonable and normal question. But it only took him a moment to recover his composure. "Dunno. Maybe it's just that I've never had a special somebody to inspire me before. Like, a player two."
In a movement so carefully casual that it ended up looking scripted, he flexed upward on his tail to give him some extra height, and planted his other hand on the closed door behind her, boxing her in with his body. Then, he leaned in close and murmured, "I think we'd make a good team, don't you?"
Although Clara usually didn't mind being touchy with other people, this was definitely pushing it. This was less of a kabedon than a kabe-please-don't. She needed to find a way to get some space again.
So, like any rational demon would, she bared her teeth and attempted to bite his nose.
He pulled back quickly as his face narrowly missed being clipped by her fangs. Instead of appearing put off by this, his blush grew even deeper, and he let out a shaky laugh, bringing his hand back to rub casually against the back of his neck. "Hehe, you're fun as usual, Clarin."
To her left, Purson let out a noise of agitation. "Give her some space, devi," he said, inserting himself in between them, pushing in close to Clara in a blatantly hypocritical fashion. Then, he turned to face Clara and offered up his own controller again.
"I'm good at video games too, you know," he said, and that actually was news to Clara. She shot a look at the TV, how his score in the fighting game was about one-eighth of Lied's at the moment, and he huffed..
"Okay, obviously not this one. Which is why you should take over for me; you'd probably have more fun playing against Lied. And I really want you to have fun!" His speech, which sounded pressured even on the best of days, was today flowing out in such a lightning-fast tumble that Clara could hardly make out what he was saying. "But there are other games we could play together! Like rhythm games! There's one that I really like that just came out recently, it's called Guitar Devil. Have you played that yet? I could show you the controls and maybe we could play a few songs together sometime, if you want. I've got a copy at my house along with some of the specialized controllers, you could come over and try it out. Not like a date or anything! Unless you want it to be? But also it's okay if you hate me and want me to go lay down in a ditch and die, I get it, just let me know."
Lied clapped him on the shoulder. "Dude. I know Clarin's breathtaking, but you've still got to breathe."
"It's so hard, though!"
Clara blinked, taking a moment to process all that they had said. She looked from Purson to Lied, taking in both of their blushy, dopey faces. Then, she started laughing so hard that she doubled over.
"What's wrong with you two today? Why are you being such sillies?" she asked, between gales of hilarity. "Is this a game? Ooh ooh ooh or a prank?"
"No!" Lied was quick to reassure her. "No, I mean, I can't speak for Purson here, but I'm being dead serious. I don't know why I didn't see it before, but suddenly I realized that you're the demoness of my dreams. I wanna date you. Will you give me a chance?"
This made Clara laugh even harder. "That's got to be a joke! You know I don't see you like that, I see you as a silly! Do you—haha, do you remember that time? That time with the—the thing?"
"Every moment I've spent with you is an irreplaceable treasure in my memory banks, Clarin." Lied reached out to take her hand tenderly. She pulled it away before he could get any ideas "But. Which time specifically?"
"You know, the time when you tried to grow flowers for Nee-san and ended up growing a humongo flesh-munching one on accident, and it chomped you and burned off all your hair and clothes with its enzymes, and by the time me and Iruma-chi and Azz-Azz came to save you you looked like a naked old baldie? That's probably the way I'll always think of you."
Lied's eyes darted away. "Oh. That time. I'm... uh, I'm surprised you remember that. Didn't that happen almost a whole month ago? Practically ancient history. Can't we move past that?"
"Nope, no way! Not never!"
The crestfallen look on Lied's face after that looked almost convincing enough to be real. He was such a good actor, Clara thought. As far as pranks go, this one really was funny.
She barely had time to appreciate Lied's acting chops, however, before Purson grabbed her attention again, along with both of her hands. "So does that mean you'll consider courting me instead? I know we don't know each other well, but I've always admired you. Your voice, the way you improvise songs—you have a cool and unique talent, you know. Have you ever wanted to be part of a duet?"
"No thanks! I'm already in a trio, and that's good enough for me!" she said airily, pulling away from him.
This was starting to get old. So she pulled away from him and retreated back to the door. "Well, I've gotta go now. Thanks for the laughs! But, maybe go easy on the energy drinks? I heard if you drink too much of those at once, it makes your mind go cuckoo. Maybe that's why you're acting so crazy right now?"
"That's not why—"
But Clara was already out the door.
As she skipped down the hall, she continued to giggle to herself. Lied and Purson were so ridiculous she could pop.
She wanted to tell Iruma and Azz what had just happened, so they could laugh at it too. She imagined what she would say once the three of them met back up that afternoon. Something like, 'haha, you won't believe this, but Fluffy-kun and Soi-Soi pretended to be head over heels for me! They acted like they loved me so much that they wanted to eat me, and kept asking me out on dates. Isn't that the most ridiculous thing you've ever heard?' And then Iruma and Azz would be like, 'haha, yeah, so ridiculous, nobody would ever think of you like that' And then...
...
Well, maybe she didn't want to imagine that anymore.
But in any case—yeah, that thing with Lied and Purson had been weird. She was glad it was over now.