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Whenever someone called to him he answered with that wobbly, anxious smile that had become so synonymous with him that no one seemed to question it anymore. Most days he didn’t mind, but today Seo Mingi was finding it mildly annoying that the other party goers didn’t seem to appreciate just how pressed he was. Weaving in and out of the other bodies, looking over the heads of everyone in the room for ash blond hair.
With every step someone else wanted to wish him happy birthday, and he kept feeling gentle tugs on his suit as those around him continuously fought for his attention. But his mind was somewhere else. He had been socializing enough, he just wanted to sink into the shadows but he had one last thing he wanted to see to.
As he reached the edge of the room there was a break in the group of people who had shown up for the dual birthday celebration. It didn’t take long to see why. Lee Sa-young was leaning against the wall near the door, arms crossed as he gave off an ominous aura. The man next to him with the featureless black mask was equally intimidating to most, but to Mingi he was a customer and friend. Even though his quarry wasn’t here, he took the moment to step out of the press of bodies of the party and into the open space to catch his breath.
“Check the roof.” He lifted his head to find the Guild Leader watching him, J’s attention having turned to him as well as whatever they had been up to was interrupted.
“The roof?” Had he really been that obvious? J glanced between Sa-young and Mingi for a moment before cocking his head to the side.
“Ah, are you looking for Jung Bin? He smokes up there sometimes,” the modulated voice responded and it was the sweetest sound. It gave him a place to search, and he clasped his hands together as he tried to formulate a response as thanks, but was quickly distracted by his Guild Leader.
He watched in wonder as the Guild Leader pushed off the wall and stepped forward. Everyone who was nearby, aside from J, seemed to jump back even though he was well away from the crowd. As he moved his shadow elongated on the wall, and Mingi took it as the invitation that it was, sliding into it. The world became slightly muted. While he could hear everyone around him it was easier to tune out the noise, but the further he traversed away from the room they were holding the birthday celebration in the more and more muffled it became until he could no longer hear the party. Instead it was replaced with the sound of shoes scuffing the roof and long, intentional inhales and exhales.
Mingi reached up from the shadow and placed his hand on the roof, it always felt like pulling himself from the depths of a quiet ocean. Everything was cool, quiet, serene, only to be thrust back into the busy cityscape of Seoul in the summer heat and humidity. There was always a moment where it was just a little overwhelming, when he wanted to dive back into that place of tranquility. This time, however, there was a surprised but warm smile to greet him as he pulled himself from his sanctuary.
“Seo Mingi-ssi, I didn’t expect to find you up here.” Mingi pulled himself upright, awkwardly brushing his hands across the tops of his thighs, even though his hands weren’t particularly dirty. The movement gave him an excuse not to answer for a moment, to think on his racing heart instead of what words he wanted to fall from his mouth.
“Ah, yes. Well I saw that you weren’t downstairs anymore and I wanted to check on how you were doing.” Smooth. Now his hands were beginning to feel clammy, but he resisted wiping them on his pants again. Jung Bin was an observant man, too many out of place gestures would most likely go uncommented on, but not unnoticed and to Mingi that mattered.
He lifted his gaze, wringing his hands together as he found Jung Bin’s signature pleasant smile, the PR smile he was so used to after years of knowing the man and seeing his advertisements everywhere. The only thing that broke the illusion was the cigarette still burning between his fingers and the scent of acrid smoke. The man seemed to notice the heat of it as it burned down, giving a soft exclamation as he jumped a bit, smudging it out on the railing he’d been leaning against just moments before.
“What can I help you with?”
Mingi hesitated for a moment, but he reached into his inventory. Was it ridiculous that he was doing it? Perhaps, but he pulled out the plate and fork before he could talk himself out of it.
Tapping the fork against the side of the plate, listening to it ring with every strike. Atop it was a slice of strawberry saeng cream cake. “I noticed you didn’t grab a slice and it was almost gone…” He trailed off as his embarrassment grew, but Jung Bin reached out and took the plate.
“Thank you,” Mingi was slightly taken aback by how grateful the man sounded, but it brought a smile to his face as he retrieved the piece he’d saved for himself on an identical plate.
“Cheers.” He extended his fork with a bite of cake on it, and Jung Bin gave a soft laugh and carefully clinked his fork against Mingi’s before taking his first bite. The man gave a hum in appreciation as he ate his slice of cake and Mingi was glad that he had remembered which flavor Jung Bin had always gravitated towards during company parties when he had still worked for the Bureau before leaving for Pado.
“Thank you, for thinking of me and coming up here to share.” Mingi couldn’t help the laugh, hiding the smile behind his hand.
“No, thank you.”
“What for?” He looked up into those warm eyes, taking another bite of his cake to give himself the space to deliberate if he wanted to answer that. For a moment he looked out over the cityscape beneath them, watching people busy with their daily lives down on the streets below.
“For not being overwhelming. For feeling safe.” This time when a soft smile spread across his own face he didn’t bother to hide it, enjoying the man at his side whose presence he found calming despite the raucous city stretched out beneath them.
There was a moment that surprise flitted across Jung Bin’s face, but it was quickly replaced by a genuine smile. He didn’t respond, but Mingi didn’t need one.
“We should head back down, before everyone realizes we’re both gone,” Mingi murmured, tucking the now empty plate and fork back into his inventory. Jung Bin nodded, heading for the access door. When he opened it, he turned back, a questioning look on his face.
Mingi glanced down at the shadows beneath his feet, thinking of his quiet ocean of a world that only he and those he allowed in had access to. It was so easy sometimes to get lost there, to float in the quiet by himself. Instead he closed the distance between him and the other man, choosing to instead take the stairs with him. Jung Bin didn’t question it, just gave another one of those true smiles that seemed so rare.
“Want to stop by the coffee station on the way back?”
“Ugh, yes, please.” They both laughed as they entered the stairwell, heading down the stairs and chatting between them as they went to fetch coffee together.