Chapter Text
“Oh, sorry—we’re closed.”
A very harried, wide-eyed woman came barrelling through the storefront anyway, ducking under the gap in the lowering gate. The equally harried, very tired worker in the pet store yelped and stopped the gate, trying to press her back through the door, but she was persistent.
“No, no, you can’t close yet! I have to return—you have to take—I can’t keep him!” she squealed, her voice unnaturally high. The worker frowned, their eyebrows drawing together. They recognised that voice. It belonged to the same woman who had come ‘round just yesterday to collect one of the new monster pets she’d ordered. The pet store itself wasn’t big enough to house them—the nearest one being over twenty miles away—but they did get them delivered in for collection. And the worker remembered this woman with intense clarity. It was putting it mildly to say that she had not been an ‘easy’ customer.
In fact, if the cage held under one of her velour-covered arms was any indication of why she had returned in such a tizzy, the worker had only one thing to say.
“Sorry, ma’am. Even if we weren’t closed, we couldn’t process your request. There are no refunds for that particular monster.”
The woman’s eyes went wider, somehow, though it hadn’t seemed possible. The worker tried to hide their distaste behind the worst smile they had ever managed in front of a customer.
“No, but—he’s defective!” The woman’s eyes narrowed as she held out the cage, and the worker could tell they were about to hear a rant that would definitely cost them valuable cleaning time. Oh well. At least they were still technically on the clock. “He doesn’t do anything! He just sits there in his cage and looks at me, or glares at my dog, licking his teeth, or growls at me when I try to pick him up! He bit me when I put his collar on!”
The woman shoved the cage at the worker, and they took it instinctively, though they immediately cursed themself, as the woman was now backtracking as well as ranting.
“I don’t care what you do with it—I don’t care if I get a refund—I just don’t want it in my house! Monsters are supposed to do cute things, and say cute stuff, and be cute!”
The worker tried to follow the woman and return the cage to her, but she was having none of it, flailing her hands as though they were trying to hand her a venomous snake. She ignored their protests, choosing instead to squeeze through the door and scold through the glass, waggling her finger as she snarled,
“Monsters are supposed to be cute! Not scary! ”
The worker just stared, their mouth hanging open slightly as they kept the cage tucked against their chest. They had never seen such incoherent disapproval before, and they had worked in retail for several years now. It was actually pretty impressive, the amount of disdain this woman had summoned.
“You’re getting a very angry, very 1-star review on Yelp! I’m going to be speaking to your manager! I’m going to complain to the company owner that you’re running a scam here!”
The worker just continued staring, slightly entranced at the amount of spit flying into the glass. They were glad it was on the outside of the store. There were cleaners that came to the mall to clean the outside windows. The worker only had to worry about the inside.
They heard a small chuckle from inside the cage.
“Are you even listening to me? Are you going to just stand there staring at me like an idiot? Or are you going to—to get rid of that thing and refund me? You have to refund me, you can’t just take it from me and not give me my money back!”
The worker blinked.
They looked down through the slats of the plastic cage and saw small red eyes peering back up at them. The worker blinked again, and looked back to the woman.
“I’m sorry, ma’am. No refunds.”
The worker couldn’t even tell what the woman was shrieking at them, she was so furious. By then, she had attracted the attention of the security guards, though, and they began speaking to her, trying to calm her down. The worker just watched her angrily attempt to explain how they had her property and she wanted it refunded or returned. The guards looked over at them.
They shrugged. “I can give her store credit?”
That was apparently the wrong thing to say.
The security guards had to escort the woman from the premises, saying how the mall was closing, and she would have to come back tomorrow to get it sorted. The worker could hear her shrieking all the way down the other end of the mall about how ‘Monsters aren’t supposed to be scary!’
Finally, though, the mall returned to its peaceful silence, and the worker was left alone with the cause of the whole mess.
Placing the cage on the top of the checkout counter, they quickly unlatched it and bent over to rest their head on their folded arms, getting on the same level as the monster. He was a humanoid skeleton, with thick bones, a heavy brow, and wicked-looking teeth that interlocked in a way that the worker could tell could cause a nasty bite if he wasn’t happy with his treatment. He was a big guy, as far as monsters went: he was about the same height as a cat, though obviously not as long. His dual-irised eyes—their colour a deep red that reminded the worker heavily of blood—were glowing and pulsing slightly as he reclined lazily against the back wall of the cage. They smiled wryly as one of his eye sockets closed cheekily, the other still watching them with obvious curiosity.
“Jeez, buddy, what the hell did you do to her?”
The monster’s toothy mouth shifted into something like a smile.
It looked just as wicked as the rest of them, and the worker couldn’t help but laugh.
“Y’alright, buddy, I don’t blame you one bit. But you put me in kind of a mess. I gotta clean this place up and get home.” They hummed thoughtfully. “I don’t really know what to do with you.”
The monster just watched, not saying anything.
The worker huffed out a sigh, the air blowing up their fringe.
“Well, I guess you’ll just have to stay snug in there for the minute. I’ll figure out what to do with you long-term once I’m done.”
The monster smiled again.
The worker flew through their tasks, taking care of the few animals they actually housed in the store and cleaning the usual mess left by customers, fixing the shelf fronts and sweeping away the dust. It took them about half the time it usually did, they were so concerned with making the monster just wait for them. He didn’t seem to mind, though. He had shuffled forward in his cage, enough to watch them working around the store without actually coming out. They talked to him as they worked, throwing out suggestions for what they could do with him for the night. He never spoke back, and they were beginning to wonder just how such a calm and quiet monster had managed to wreck that woman’s world.
Finally, though, they were done. They collected their things and went back to where the monster waited, his feet against the countertop as he leaned his elbows forward on his knees, his head propped up on his palm, while the other dangled between his legs. He looked bored, but still interested in the worker. They didn’t blame him. Cleaning was one of the most boring parts of the day, though they did enjoy the routine of it.
“So. What should I do with you, then, huh?”
The worker leaned forward, mimicking the monster’s pose. The monster just watched them, saying nothing. Finally, after a bit of thought, the worker sighed with a smile.
“I guess I can’t leave you here. There isn’t anywhere to keep you. And even if there was, I’m sure my boss would kill me for leaving you for them to find in the morning.”
They tapped their fingers against the counter, before standing straight again and shrugging.
“Looks like you’re coming home with me for tonight, buddy. Hope you don’t mind.”
The monster shrugged back at them.
They snorted and gestured to the cage. “Alright, at least that’s settled for now. Go ahead and jump back in there and we’ll get go—or, ah, or you could just jump on my arm. That…that works too.”
The worker smiled nervously down at the monster now clinging to their jacket, his long, sharp claws digging in. He scrambled up their sleeve as they yelped with surprise, leaning away to watch him as best they could. Finally he settled himself on their shoulder, kicking his tennis-shoed foot once against their clavicle.
“You okay up there?” the worker asked, peering at him nervously. “You’re not gonna fall?”
The skeleton monster shook his head the smallest amount, tucking his chin below the high collar of his jacket.
“Take me home.”
The worker blinked at the small, but very deep voice that rumbled from the monster. Well, okay. If he said so.
“You’re the boss, applesauce.”
The monster smiled.