Chapter Text
Regulus became more and more wound up as the Hogwarts Express pulled into Kings Cross. He knew his knee was bouncing uncontrollably, his palms were sweaty and his heart was racing something fierce.
A calm gentle hand came down across his leg to soothe him and he grimaced up at his boyfriend.
“It’s only two weeks, love.”
James smiled softly at him before looking out of the window wistfully.
Of course James was excited for the Christmas break. James’ mother wasn’t insane.
“Two weeks,” Regulus repeated reproachfully, sharing an exasperated look with Sirius, who seemed to be sharing in his anxiety but was displaying it remarkably differently.
He was all over Remus. It was a sight that would usually have made Regulus’ sick to his stomach but he knew it was Sirius’ way of distracting himself. Their mother was a unique woman and far too similar to Sirius than his brother ever cared to admit.
She seemed to adopt new idiosyncrasies every year that passed and spending two full weeks with her was… taxing at best.
When they were children she was obsessed with image and maintaining the family’s standing in the wizarding world. Age had mellowed that urge within her somewhat and while she still was shockingly fixated on how she was perceived by her peers, her obsessions now lay on herself rather than on her two sons.
Maybe it was the gay thing.
Walburga blew a gasket when Sirius came out - ranting about how much time she had wasted scouring their society for appropriate women for him to marry. She got over it quicker than either of them anticipated though and turned all of her attention onto Regulus. Once Regulus announced, he too, was into men, Walburga seemed to instantly give up all hope of an heir and went back to her own life.
She was the ultimate main character in her head, appearing to forget she even had children at times. Both boys knew there was love there, somewhere, deep down, but it wasn’t hard to feel like an afterthought when it came to their own mother.
The train pulled to a stop and the brother’s exited as if they were walking to their own execution. James and Remus bid them farewell as they made their own ways home, Remus towards a connecting train to Wales and James towards his parents who waved joyously at the group. Regulus was itching to go say hi to Effie and Monty and knew Sirius felt the same but their mother would take it as a social slight if they approached the Potters before they greeted her.
Sirius frowned as he looked up and down the rapidly emptying platform as their classmates met up with their families and were immediately apparated away or pulled towards the wall to enter into the muggle part of the station.
Their parents were nowhere in sight. Regulus couldn’t spot Kreacher either, which was disappointing. Kreacher was the only part of going home that he was looking forward to.
“Do you think they forgot?”
“Probably,” Sirius sighed as he shrunk his trunk down before moving to do the same to Regulus’. Once their trunks were safely stowed in their pockets, Sirius reached out his hand and Regulus looked down at it.
“What?” Regulus asked, blankly.
“Well only one of us has passed his apparition exam so you are going to have to swallow your pride little brother and hold my hand. I’ll get us home.”
Regulus sighed as he weighed his options before reluctantly reaching out to grasp Sirius’ hand and felt himself instantly be pulled away from the station before stumbling to a stop at the top step of 12 Grimmauld place.
“I really hate that you are legally allowed to do magic and I’m not. It seems wholly unfair,” he grumbled as he dusted himself off and straightened his back. There would be less drama from his parents if he was presenting himself well during their reunion.
Sirius didn’t seem to care about this fact and appeared to slouch further in protest of Regulus’ careful ministrations to tidy himself up. His brother smirked at him before opening the door and allowing Regulus to walk past him into the manor.
“Life is unfair, Reggie, you’ll get over it, you’re literally seventeen next week anyway,” Sirius offered, reaching out to attempt to ruffle Regulus’ hair out of place. Regulus moved to dodge the intrusion and was about to retaliate when the noise from inside the house reached their ears and they both stopped dead in their tracks.
“She said my dress was old fashioned, Orion! OLD FASHIONED! My reputation will be ruined if I don’t upstage that bitch at the next ladies lunch so don’t you dare tell me I’m overreacting!”
“But did you have to send Kreacher to Madam Malkin’s this afternoon, dear? I might have thought dinner would be a bit more of a priority?”
“Oh will you stop thinking of your stomach at a time like this! This is an emergency! I need new robes and dresses immediately! Druella will eat her words, I’ll make sure of it. The Potters New Year’s ball is the event of the season and I need options now! Why must I explain everything to you?”
The brother’s exchanged another look as Regulus watched Sirius lean into the closed front door and let his head fall back in a ‘thunk’.
“Well that explains why not even Kreacher was there to pick us up,” Regulus grumbled as he moved further into the house, cataloguing the space with his eyes and confirming nothing had really changed since they left for school four months ago.
“Bloody Kreacher,” Sirius mumbled as he shucked off his jacket, letting it fall to the floor and walking away from it without a second thought. Regulus huffed, reaching down to pick it up and place it carefully on the coat rack. Sirius never seemed to care that his actions would cause unnecessary arguments. He never understood that the path of least resistance was the best way to deal with their parents. Either that, or he got off on the drama. That was probably the reason now Regulus really thought about it. Like he said, Walburga and Sirius were far too similar for their own good.
“Honey, we’re hoooome,” Sirius bellowed into the empty entranceway.
The argument upstairs stopped abruptly as his parents realised they weren’t alone. Regulus could picture their faces vividly as he imagined them twisted in confusion before recollection of the date dawned on them.
Orion appeared at the head of the stairs and smiled unconvincingly at his sons. He was a beaten down old man these days, more clueless than cruel. He, like Regulus, accepted that resistance was futile and just went along with whatever Walburga wanted as it made his life easier. Regulus was always under the impression that he never particularly cared to reproduce and still looked shocked whenever he was reminded he was the father to two almost adult men.
“Sirius, Regulus, we weren’t expecting you until tomorrow,” he grimaced as he came down the stairs to hug them both stiffly.
“The break starts December 21st, same date every year,” Sirius replied, waving his hand boredly at his father.
“Right. Well, welcome home. Your mother is…”
“Having a crisis!” Walburga shrieked, still upstairs, voice muffled by several walls. Regulus assumed she was now rifling through her closet in a panic, trying to find something she seemed suitable. Sirius scoffed but relented, rolling his eyes, at the sharp look Orion shot at him.
“Regulus? Regulus!! Come up here please!”
Regulus looked helplessly at his brother and father before sighing deeply and making his way up the stairs, throwing his trunk in Sirius’ direction so he could unshrink it and put it in his room for him. Sirius ducked his head and smiled at the gesture of trust. No one was allowed in Regulus’ room unless given explicit permission.
As expected, Regulus found his mother in her closet, surrounded by discarded pieces of clothing. She was holding an old dress up to her wiry frame and looking at herself in the mirror. Regulus did not understand why he was forced to be her fashion advisor. Sirius would do a better job of it but Walburga always asked Regulus to do these annoying tasks. Perhaps it was because she knew Regulus would just tell her what she wanted to hear rather than offer his actual opinion. He really needed to grow a backbone.
“It’s nice,” he offered, unconvincingly.
“Nice? It’s OLD! I’m old!” She wailed as she threw it on the rapidly growing discard pile.
“You’re not old, mother. It’s just a dress,” he shrugged as he moved to rifle through what she had already deemed unacceptable attire.
Walburga’s face morphed in frustration as she turned back to her clothes to find something else. Regulus knew how to make this interaction end as quickly as possible and ushered her out of the way to take over. He located one of her best dresses and quickly searched his memory for one of the nights she felt pretty wearing it.
“How about this one? Not for the Potters ball, I’m sure Kreacher will bring home something wonderful for that, but for the next ladies lunch? You looked so lovely in it during high tea with the Malfoys.”
“It’s awfully gauche to repeat an outfit, Regulus.”
“Not if you style it differently. Try it with your pearls and your silver heels. You could even wear that diamond bracelet of grandmother’s to really shove it in Druella’s face. She was always bitter that that piece went to you rather than her in the will.”
Regulus held his breath as his mother contemplated his words and exhaled in relief when her face relaxed.
“Yes, yes. You are absolutely right, I will get Kreacher to break the safety charm around the bracelet as soon as he gets home. You’re a good boy. Welcome home, dear.”
He accepted her cold kiss to his cheek and moved to leave the room, happy to have diffused the first major bomb of the holidays.
As he passed his father in the hallway, he received a nod and clasp on his shoulder in appreciation and he continued to walk towards his bedroom, fully ready for a few hours to himself to settle in fully. He would ask to borrow Sirius’ magic two-way mirror later to speak to James but he wanted to give his boyfriend a couple of hours to reunite with his parents. Right now, his book and his bed were the only things that mattered.
—
The days passed agonisingly slowly at Grimmauld place. Regulus squirrelled away time in the library, where he knew he would not be bothered. Sirius grew antsier by the day, sequestered in their family home, unable to do as he pleased. He started taking it upon himself to disrupt Regulus as much as possible, desperate for someone to interact with that wasn’t their parents, or Kreacher.
“C’mon Reggie, it’ll be fun.”
“I don’t understand the rules.”
“Ugh, how many times do I need to explain? We cut holes in two sheets like goals. You have to levitate objects through the holes as fast as you can. The smaller the hole, the more points you get.”
“Kreacher will go spare at us for ruining the sheets.”
Sirius threw him an unimpressed look and Regulus relented.
“Fine. But technically, I’m still not allowed to do magic outside of school.”
“When has that ever stopped any pureblood before, Reggie? The ministry can’t detect your magic through the centuries of horrendous shit that is already present in our lovely family home. This is mindless fun! It’s not like we are breaking the rules to go torture muggles or something! The precious statute of secrecy will not be at risk from a little game of keepie-uppies.”
“What the fuck did you just say?”
“Keepie-uppies? I dunno, Rem named it. I think it’s a muggle thing.”
Regulus was loathed to admit it but he did actually have fun slicing various sized holes in his sheet for Sirius to try send flying objects through. He realised he was properly smiling for the first time since saying goodbye to James at the station as Sirius sent another priceless artifact flying through the room towards his goal. Regulus was enjoying himself so much, he didn’t realise the next thing Sirius had picked up with his wand was the old urn that sat on the fireplace mantle in the room and shouted, “NO!” as it careened through the air.
He sent a cushioning charm just in time to stop the urn from shattering on the ground and gingerly picked it up and placed it back where it belonged.
“What the hell is the matter with you?”
“What?” Sirius seemed perplexed and Regulus had to take several breaths to keep his composure.
“Sirius, that was Grandmother’s ashes. Where is your respect?”
“That’s where we keep grandmother?? I thought it was just an old vase?”
Regulus broke at Sirius’ complete ignorance and he couldn’t stop the giggle that left his mouth. Sirius joined him and soon they were both failing at smothering their laughter as it rang out through the room.
“What is that awful sound?”
Walburga strode into the room, looking around distastefully.
“Um… the laughter of your children?” Sirius offered, bursting into another hysterical fit at the confused look on their mother’s face.
Walburga hummed, sparing one more look around the ruined library and huffed before exiting as quickly as she had come, calling for Kreacher as she did so, likely to order him to clean up the mess her sons had created.
Regulus took pity on the old elf for being summoned to clean up after him and quickly got to work tidying the space as Sirius reclined on the couch, his legs leaning up against the wall and his head falling backwards over the chair to appraise Regulus upside down.
“Suck up.”
“It’s not Kreacher’s fault you have the attention span of a three-year-old, Sirius.”
Sirius scoffed but offered no rebuttal. He began fiddling with his wand before reluctantly casting a sewing charm on the sheets to close the holes, all while remaining upside down. When he was done, you couldn’t even tell they were tampered with to begin with. He really was a very talented wizard, Regulus hated to admit.
—
Christmas dinner was a quiet affair, much to both boys' surprise. It appeared the rift between Walburga and Druella was more serious than they realised as they usually had to endure a stuffy dinner full of extended family members.
The day proceeding it was just as quiet, the Blacks were never big celebrators of Christmas. They never had a tree or did presents like the Potters. The whole day was usually just a way for their parents to boast about their status and wealth to the other sacred 28 families.
This year, it was just the four of them, sitting at a ridiculously long dining table eating a feast that could have fed upwards of twelve people. Walburga and Orion sat at each end with Regulus and Sirius opposite each other in the middle. It was quiet, conversation stilling after a few awkward attempts and predictably Sirius became bored of the charade. Regulus felt a small kick at his leg under the table and he looked up to glare at his brother who was sipping his wine surreptitiously.
He kicked back.
An all out war broke out with both boys attempting to land a kick without giving away what they were up to. Sirius finally landed a winner, his boot connecting painfully with Regulus’ shin and Regulus winced.
“Fuuu…”
“REGULUS… Black!” Walburga shrieked, her anger subsided somewhat by the fact she clearly was thinking about something and coming up blank.
“You can’t remember my middle name, can you?” Regulus asked in disbelief.
“Of course I can! I blessed you with it!” Walburga huffed as she looked towards Orion who just shrugged back at her in response.
Walburga narrowed her eyes in thought and said quietly, almost to herself, “Orion…?”
“That’s my middle name, mother,” Sirius chuckled as he lifted both hands and placed them behind his head, clearly enjoying the show, “why don’t you go through the alphabet? I’m sure it’ll come to you.”
“Alphard… no that’s not right… Regulus B… C… D…”
“It’s Arcturus, mother,” Regulus sighed as he returned to his meal.
“Well of course it is,” she huffed.
“How is old Alphard these days anyway?” Sirius asked, knowing full well he was stirring the pot. Orion froze, Walburga grimaced and Regulus slumped, defeated.
It was going to be a long night.