Chapter Text
For some reason, there was this unusual ache in Tatsuya Shima's heart. He tried a variety of things: taking his car for a drive, upgrading it, and even trying to make friends and establish relationships. None of this worked, so he asked one of the few friends he had for advice.
"Are your parents alive, Shima?" Ishida had asked him, taking a sip of his drink. Tatsuya's heart ached. "My father doesn't live in the country anymore," he answered.
Ishida's eyes widened for a second. "Is that so? What about your mother?"
Tatsuya sighed. "My mother is still in Japan. Why do you ask?”
Ishida took another sip of his drink before answering. “Go visit her.”
“What?”
“Go visit her,” he paused, before continuing. “I didn't visit my parents after I got older, and I regret it.”
Tatsuya considered his words. “Thank you. I guess I'll visit her,” he replied, finishing off his drink.
A few days later, Tatsuya packed a small suitcase with some clothes for a few days. His fingers traced over a framed photo of him and Asakura, taken a mere two weeks before his passing. He gently lowered it into the suitcase and zipped it up.
Tatsuya loaded the suitcase into his car before getting in and starting it. However, there was someone he had to see first. He drove for a bit until he encountered the place he was looking for. He got out and knocked on the door. He heard scrambling around inside before the door opened.
“Oh, Blackbird. What brings you here? Would you… Like to come in?”
“I have a quick message for you, Asakura. I won't be long.”
The brunette nodded. “Sure. What is it?”
Tatsuya took a deep breath. “I'm going to visit my mother. I'll be back in a few days to a week.”
Akio hummed in confusion. Tatsuya answered his unspoken question. “Drive on the Wangan without me. Or don't. Just don't look for me. You'll know when I return,” he paused, before quickly adding, “Asakura.”
Akio thought for a moment. “Okay. I understand. But first, I have something for you.” Akio disappeared for a moment before returning with something in his hand. “Hold your hand out.”
Tatsuya curiously held out his hands, waiting to see what the Z driver had for him. He felt something small and metal in his hands. Upon further investigation, Tatsuya realized it was a scale model of his car. His gaze softened. “Thank you, Asakura… This is really thoughtful. You didn't have to do this,” he said, his voice revealing his shock. It was a surprise, but it was a welcome one.
Akio smiled. “I hope you like it. I'll see you in a week, Blackbird.”
Tatsuya managed a small smile. “Thank you, Asakura. I'll be back soon.” Tatsuya then returned to his car. He made the journey to his childhood home. The closer he got, the more familiar the surroundings became. At the same time, however, it was… different. Uncomfortably different at times. Soon, Tatsuya was home. He parked his car and slowly approached the front door. He was nervous. What if she doesn't want to see me? Does she even remember me? he asked himself. Tatsuya took a deep breath and knocked on the door. Seconds felt like minutes. Minutes felt like hours. In what felt like an hour but was really five seconds, the door opened.
“Tatsuya,” she whispered, shocked by his presence. “Please, come in,” she said, smiling. She escorted him inside the house he used to call home. He looked around, taking in the surroundings. Memories came flooding back. Most importantly, though, he looked at his mother. She had aged, yes, but she was still beautiful to him. In a way, his future was looking back at him. Tatsuya looked exactly like his mother. He looked so much like her that she always joked that she “made him from scratch” and that his father “wasn't there when she made him”. To Tatsuya, that was a good thing. After all…
“Have you heard from your father, Tatsuya?” she asked, handing him a cup of tea. She remembered how he liked it, which melted his cold heart a bit.
“I have not. Have you?” he replied, watching as she sat across from him. She sighed.
“No.”
“I don't really want to talk to him anyway.”
“I don't blame you,” she replied, sipping her tea. She reached over and tucked some loose strands of hair behind Tatsuya's ear. Her touch was light, gentle… motherly.
“I also hear that you've followed in your father's footsteps as a surgeon,” she said. Tatsuya nodded. “Yes. I am a surgeon now. It's a decent career,” he replied.
“Wife? Girlfriend?”
He hesitated. “No.”
“Ah, I see. That's okay. Look how I ended up,” she said, chuckling. She tried to make light of the situation. If anything, it felt like a punch to the gut. Tatsuya hated to think about the man he shared half of his DNA with. His mother then changed the topic.
“You came a long way, didn't you? Do you… Need to go home?” she asked, her voice carrying a hint of sadness.
“I brought a suitcase. That is, if you don't mind me staying,” he replied. He was torn. Part of him wanted her to say no. Another part of him wanted her to say yes. For some reason, the part of him that wanted her to say yes was louder and more dominant.
“Of course you can. You're my son,” she replied. “Let's go get your suitcase.”
The two of them went out to Tatsuya's car. He got his suitcase out of it. Somehow, Mrs. Shima was not surprised by his choice of vehicle. She escorted him back inside. The sun was starting to set.
“Have you eaten?”
“No. I can go get food.”
“Nonsense. I'm cooking for you.”
Tatsuya's chest hurts at her words. He refused to tell his mother no. “I understand.”
After he took his suitcase to his childhood room, his mother started to cook his favorite meal. It was oddly… painful. He didn't expect the smell of his childhood to hurt so much. It took all he had not to lose it right there. She soon served him and herself.
“Thank you. Let's eat,” he said softly. The food was delicious. It tasted exactly how Tatsuya remembered. His heart wanted to reject her gesture. The only thing that stopped him was the fact that his own mother was taking care of him.
“Thank you for the meal,” he said, finishing up. He helped her clean up.
“Of course, Tatsuya,” she replied with a smile. “I don't like that you're taller than me now. What happened?” she teased, tugging at Tatsuya's heartstrings. He felt bad for not visiting his mother.
“Have you been lonely? Do you have someone to turn to when you need help?” he asked. She turned to him and smiled. “I have a group of friends I can turn to. Do you have any friends in your life, Tatsuya?”
Tatsuya didn’t want to think about it. “I… do. I have some friends,” he replied. It wasn’t a lie; he did have friends. He lost a friend and gained a few more. “We… all like cars. We’re like a car group. We aren’t a racing team,” he explained. It wasn’t a lie. It wasn’t the entire truth, but it wasn’t a lie.
“That sounds fun!” she replied. Tatsuya then remembered the Porsche toy in his pocket. He took it out and showed it to his mother. “One of my friends gave this to me. I got it today, actually.”
She took the model from him and examined it. “Aw, that’s so sweet! I hope your friends are nice,” she said. Tatsuya simply nodded. He envied her. Despite everything, she was still happy. The love of her life left her to go to Africa. He left her with a ten-year-old son. She had to manage a hospital and a son all by herself. How could she be happy like this? How did she recover from this?
To make matters worse, Tatsuya studied abroad in Germany. The two people who meant the most to her left the country. Upon Tatsuya’s return, he moved away to start his career as a surgeon. How was she happy?
He could never hate his mother.
He sure as hell envied her.