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It was a dark, quiet night in New York City. Somewhere deep beneath the streets,
the lair of the teenage mutant ninja turtles was unusually quiet. The lights were dim. The pipes rustled, and some rats squaked in the distance. Water dripped from the pipes, hitting the water Below and the ground with a small splash.Somewhere in the tunnels, a silouette walks , muttering to himself. Gripping his trademark knife, Ghostface chuckles under his breath.
Ghostface( to himself): Alright… I’ve scared cheerleaders, babysitters, and teenagers in horror films who definitely should’ve died earlier… But tonight? We level up. Simple mutant turtles? Pfft. How scary could that be?What are they gonna do, bite my ankles? I Bet they are slow and Smart like furniture.
Ghostface arrived at the entrance of the lair and tip-toed. He crawled under the turnstiles, got up , dusted his black robes and scanned the sorroundings until his gaze fell on four sleeping turtles in full Gear.
Mikey was curled on the couch, sorrounded by some pillows, a pizza shaped plushie and a blanket, his nunchucks at his sides.He still wore his Orange bandana with short tails.
Donnie was sleeping on his side next to the TV, screwdriver in one hand and a remote in the other, his bo staff straped to his Shell.The long tails of his purple bandana cascaded over his shoulders.
Raph was passed out on the floor face first, next to Mikey , snoring, his Sais under his pillow. Even in sleep, he frowned, and his Red bandana made him look even more angry.
Leo was curled up on the bean bag, sleeping peacefully,his swords leaning against the bag, the Red handles with yellow rhombs barely sticking from behind him.His sapphire blue bandana was neat , ordered, just like him.
Ghostface blinked once. Then twice. Then he laughed.
Ghostface: That's it? This are The mighty turtles I Heard about?(Laughing) I expected Hulk sized war monsters, not cute pocket-sized turtles.
He creept toward them and took a better look at the sleeping turtles.
Ghostface: Heh, this is gonna be to easy. I almost feel bad..almost, heh.
He circled Mikey.
Ghostface: Heh, maybe I should start with You, Orange Hello Kitty. You're the smallest around here.Bet You're the youngest and easiset to scare.( He looked to Raph). Or maybe with The red-banded one? He looks grumpy .Grrr. So fierce! Does your anger grow when nap time ends early?( Then looks to Donnie).Maybe with The purple banded one? I Bet he sleep- talks about math.(His gaze shifts to Leo)Oh, maybe I should start with The blue one....Nah, better the Orange one.
Ghostface rose his knife and stood above Mikey.
Ghostface: Nighty-night, Orange Hello Kitty.
He lowered the knife..until a strong Green hand gripped his hand.
Raph( looks up, his acide green eyes narrowed): Try it. I dare ya.
In one motion, he twisted villain's wrist and the knife Fell on the floor with a small clink.
Then, one by one, they woke up.
Raph growled and stood up.
Leo’s eyes snappes open.
Instantly.
Like a haunted action figure.
He grabbed a katana without blinking.
Leo:I will break your kneecaps in perfect silence.
Ghostface (froze):…They're awake.
Raph took his Sais and spinned them.
Donnie’s eyes opened and he grabbed his bo staff.
Mikey’s too, nunchucks spinning in both hands.
Ghostface: Okay, wait a second! Are those..actual weapons?
Raph(grinning, cracking his knuckles): Yes, very sharp.
Ghostface: Wait..WAIT! You're..NINJAS?!
Leo: We’re trained assassins, yes.
Mikey:And part-time musicians!
Donnie:And engineers, hackers, and masters of fourteen martial arts disciplines.
Raph:And we’re cranky when woken up.
Ghostface (mumbling):They told me you were just cute mutant turtles… not genetically-engineered murder gymnasts!!
Ghostface turned and bolted like his movie franchise just got cancelled, screaming and flailing.
Mikey (yelling):CHASE SEQUENCE!! LET’S GOOOO!
They took off after him — yelling, laughing, weapons spinning.
They ran across the lair.
Through the living room.
Through the kitchen, where they nearly cornered him and chased him around the kitchen table.
On the hallway with The bedrooms.
Ghostface (screaming):WHY ARE YOU FAST?! WHY ARE YOU SO FAST?!
Donnie:Plot twist: We're mutant turtles with enhanced speed, agilty and strength. You lose!
Mikey (holding a glitter bomb):SURPRISE, GHOSTY!
KABOOM.
The Villain was covered Head to toes in Pink glitter.
Then they sprinted through the dojo.
Ghostface:WAIT. HOLD ON. I’M THE MONSTER HERE. I WEAR A MASK. I CALL PEOPLE AND THREATEN THEM—
Leo:We have nunchucks, a bo staff, two sai, and swords. What do you have?
Ghostface (held up his plastic voice changer):...Emotionally unstable cosplay energy?
Mikey:GET HIM!
Finally, Ghostface ran and jumped over the turnstiles and sprinted down the tunnels, the turtles hot on his heels. He took multiple corners until he lost them. He arrived at the other door of the lab, and tip-toed in, panting.
Ghostface(leaning against the door): These.. kids are.. unhinged. Maybe..maybe their dad is slow. Old. Calm. Probably just drinks tea and gives speeches. (pauses) Yeah, I’ll scare the sensei. Freak him out. Break their emotional backbone. Horror Movie 101. But first I need my knife.
But...Casey and April walked by him.
April( holding 4 pizza boxes, her tessen and sword at her side):Is that guy covered in glitter and Alfredo sauce?
Casey (lifting bat):I’ve been waitin' my whole life for a moment like this.
Ghostface SCREAMED and took off running again.
He sprinted toward the main area and took his knife from the floor.
Ghostface: Now, it's time to scary the Sensei.
He moved around until he arrived at Splinter's door.
From the entrance of the lair, he Heard Shouting; precisely, the turtles shouting.
Mikey: YO, GHOSTY, READY FOR ROUND TWO?
Ghostface jumped, opened the door and yeeted himself inside, closing it fast.
Inside the that room, candles flickered. Incense drifted. The air was still.
Master Splinter was sitting cross-legged, his Brown robes pristine as usual, Hood on Head.
His Amber eyes were closed, a cup of tea resting next to him.
A single cherry blossom fell from nowhere.
It was perfect serenity. And Ghostface decided to break it.
Ghostface(loud, dramatic):I am the shadow! I am the fear! I am the—
Splinter opened one eye.
Splinter:I am not impressed.
Ghostface:…wait what?
Splinter stood up and took down his Hood.
Ghostface:Oh no. A rat. Big rat. Tall rat. Wise rat. Dangerous rat. DON’T YOU DARE.
Splinter (calmly): You are loud. And you smell of moldy intentions.(Pause)You came into my home. You mocked and attempted to kill my children.And worst of all… you interrupted my meditation.
Ghostface:...Your what now—
Splinter:I was hoping for a peaceful evening. But alas…Judo.
Ghostface( confused, blinked): Say what?
He blinked — and in one fluid motion, the rat Sensei:
Threw his tea at GhostFace to disarm him( not burn him).
Spined the saucer into Ghostface’s mask like a frisbee of judgment
Pressure-point jabbed his shoulder with two fingers
And flipped him with zero effort with such precision that the laws of gravity temporarily apologised.
Ghostface FLEW across the room, landing in a basket of laundry. A sock sticked to his mask.
Splinter:You have been... steeped.
Ghostface (upside down, stuck in the basket):WHAT JUST HAPPENED—???
Splinter calmly poured tea in his cup and took a sip without looking as Ghostface tried to untangle himself.
Ghostface (muffled, still under laundry):WHO IS THE RAT AND WHY IS HE STRONGER THAN DEATH ITSELF—
Splinter put his cup down and yanked Ghostface put.
Ghostface (panicking):OKAY OKAY! YOU WIN! YOU WIN! I’M RETIRING! I’M JOINING THERAPY!
Splinter (tucked a napkin into Ghostface’s shirt):
You will sit. You will breathe. You will eat soup.
Ghostface:I’m… sorry?
Splinter:You are lost. I will guide you. Then I will allow my sons to chase you again. For training.
Meanwhile, the turtles, Casey and April arrived at Splinter's door.
Leo (panting):We lost him! Is Splinter okay—
They looked in. They froze.
Ghostface was kneeling in front of Splinter, holding a bowl of soup, eyes wide.
Mikey : Aw, Man! Sensei got him before we could.
Casey(whispers):Bro’s been spiritually rebooted.
April:Did he… cry?
Leo (blinking):Did Master Splinter already flip him?
Donnie:Sensei just unlocked his trauma like a side quest.
Splinter (without turning):Clean him up. Return him to the tunnels. Give him a head start.
Leo:How much?
Splinter:Two minutes. Maybe three. I am feeling generous.
Ghostface:PLEASE JUST LET ME OUT.
Ghostface jumped to his feet and sprinted outside the room..only to hit Leatherhead.
Leatherhead (7 feet tall, deep Cajun accent):I heard screaming. Did someone disturb the peace?
Ghostface (sees him):NOPE. NOPE. I'M OUT.
He jumped back on his feet and backpedaled the opposite direction—
Tripped over Mikey’s skateboard.
Slid into a pizza box.
Landed in Raph’s arms.
Raph:Aw, come here, little slasher baby.
Ghostface (losing it):I DON’T EVEN LIKE MOVIES ANYMORE.
10 minutes later....
Ghostface was covered in glitter. Pizza sauce. With a towel over his head and a soup spoon in one hand. And currently, chased by four teenage mutant ninja turtles, one hockey player swinging a bar and one Red Head wielding a tessen.
Ghostface (screaming):WHY DOES EVERYTHING IN THIS SEWER KNOW KARATE?!
From behind:
Mikey:Bet I can hit him with a breadstick!
Raph:THREE! TWO! ONE! GO!!
Epilogue
Ghostface was duct-taped to an old, scratched skateboard and sent rolling back to the surface with a sticky note that said:
,,We may be small turtles, but we’re deadly. Booyakasha."
He emerged onto the sidewalk, traumatized, covered in pizza, nunchuck bruises, and profound regret.
He stopped in front of a petshop..and saw in the glass an anounce about turtles and a photo.
Ghostface screamed again.
The End.