Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

"Hey, kiddo," Officer Kaya Blanke called out as she closed the door to her building. "Does someone know you're out here?"

It was early on a Monday morning, but the late August heat of the city was already settling in. Kaya was grateful she could wear short sleeves with her uniform now, after a couple of hot summers as a rookie.

The boy, sitting on the building steps made a non-committal "hmm" without looking away from the book in his lap.

Kaya went down a couple of steps so she was just above his eye level and cleared her throat. He looked up, sweeping his floppy dark hair out of his face.

"Oh—sorry, Officer... ma'am..."

"Do your parents know you're down here?" she asked again.

"Umm, my mom's just upstairs," he replied, avoiding the question.

"Hmm," Kaya said. "Which apartment?"

He told her, and she nodded, recognising the apartment number on her floor which had been vacant for a couple of months. She buzzed the apartment.

"Yes?" came the tired answer after a couple of rings.

"Hello ma'am, I live in 4C. I've got your son down here, says you know he's outside..."

"What!? Teddy? What's he... I'll be right down."

"Teddy?" Kaya asked, turning back to the boy. He nodded. "I'm Kaya," she held out a hand, and he took it, standing up. She looked him up and down —he was about ten, skinny, dressed in clothes that were a little too big. "Welcome to the building."

"Thanks," Teddy said shyly, scuffing his shoe on the concrete.

"Teddy!" a frazzled redheaded woman burst through the front door and rushed towards her son. She grabbed his face gently, making sure he was okay. "I thought you were in your room!"

Teddy jerked his face from his mother's hands. "Mooom, don't. It's too hot up there."

"I know it's hot baby but you can't be out here by yourself."

Teddy hung his head, and his mother shooed him back inside. Before she followed him, she turned to Kaya.

"Thank you for calling me, Officer... Blanke," she read off Kaya's name badge.

"Of course. I'm Kaya," she said, offering a hand.

"Elsbeth Tascioni," was the reply, and Elsbeth shook Kaya's hand with both of hers. "And that was Teddy..."

"You two new to the city?"

"Yes, just moved here from Chicago. I've always loved New York," Elsbeth said wistfully. "This short term rental though," she wrinkled her nose. "The A/C isn't working and they can't send someone out till next week."

"I could take a look at it, if you like?" Kaya offered.

"Ohhhh, Officer, I couldn't ask you to do that..."

"You didn't ask, I offered. I can swing by after work today. And please, call me Kaya."

"Okay, Kaya, but—" Elsbeth's eyes twinkled, "only if you agree to stay for dinner."

Kaya laughed. "Okay, deal. I better head to work," she hitched a thumb toward the street.

"Bye! See you tonight!" Elsbeth called, waving as she closed the door behind her.

Kaya smiled to herself as she walked to the subway. Elsbeth seemed a little strange, not someone she would usually talk to. But for some reason she already felt like they would become friends.

Chapter Text

Kaya knocked on the Tascionis' door a little after six o'clock. She'd brought over a couple of tools, but having fixed her own air conditioner and even a couple of her neighbours' over the years, she didn't think it would take long to get this one running again.

Elsbeth answered the door in a frilly apron, holding a half peeled carrot. She'd changed from the grey suit and blouse she'd been in this morning to a light pink t-shirt and pants.

"Kaya! Hi!" she said brightly, swinging the door open. "Welcome!"

"Thanks," Kaya said, entering. She spotted the air conditioning unit in the window.

Elsbeth went back to the kitchen, which, in the small apartment, only put a couple of feet between them.

"How was your day today?" Elsbeth asked. Before Kaya could answer, she continued: "Your job must be so exciting, taking you all over the city, seeing all kinds of people. Is there anything you think we should do before Teddy starts school next week?"

Kaya waited a moment to make sure Elsbeth was finished. "Hmm, I like the high line..."

"Ohhh, I've heard about that! You can see into people's apartments! Yes, great idea. We're going on the hip hop bus around the city, and of course the Statue of Liberty... I really want to go to the top of the Empire State Building... I just love it. But Teddy doesn't like heights," she frowned.

"I could look after Teddy one night if you wanted to go," Kaya offered before she could stop herself. What am I saying? I met this woman today...

"Oh, I couldn't ask you to do that! Besides, I don't have anyone to go with," Elsbeth said sadly. "Actually, I do need to find a babysitter though. Do you know anyone?"

"Uhh, no," Kaya said. She switched the air conditioner on, and, satisfied it was working, rolled up her tools and went to sit at the kitchen counter, watching as Elsbeth finished cooking. "My sister might know someone, but she lives on Staten Island..."

"I guess I'll just ask around at school, or maybe someone at the office will know someone..."

Elsbeth slid a dish into the oven and set a timer, washed her hands and dropped her apron on the counter. Finally, she turned to face Kaya.

"Oh! You're finished!" Elsbeth rounded the counter to look at the working unit. "You're an angel!"

Kaya blushed at the compliment. "I've had the same problem with mine about a dozen times over the years."

"Still, we appreciate it. I was going to have to take a morning off next week for the repair company..." Elsbeth walked over to the fridge. "Do you want something to drink?" she held up some bottles of ginger ale.

"Sure, thanks."

"Come sit."

Kaya followed Elsbeth into the living room and sat down on the couch, taking her drink. Elsbeth sat facing her, with her feet pulled up underneath herself.

"So..." Kaya started awkwardly under Elsbeth's gaze. "Where will you be working?" she asked. She was curious about what had brought this vibrant woman and her son to the city, but she decided to keep it neutral for now—they were just getting to know each other.

"I'm a lawyer," Elsbeth said. She waved her hand in the air. "I had to visit the courthouse today to have my licence transferred from Illinois. I start on Monday, I'm a little nervous," she confessed.

Kaya nodded. "A new job in a new city? I'd be nervous too. Do you know many other lawyers in New York?"

"I do, but no one at my new firm. I'm switching fields too, so it's all new."

"Why the change?" Kaya asked.

Elsbeth sighed. "I've been a defense attorney for almost fifteen years, and I'm good at it. But I only went down that path because of my husband—ex," she clarified at Kaya's raised eyebrow, "—and now that we're here, I want to start a new chapter. I'll be working in impact litigation."

"Your ex..." Kaya trailed off, realising it might be too personal a question.

"He wasn't abusive," Elsbeth said softly, "if that's what you're wondering. We..." she bit her lip, looking for the right words, "disagreed on how to raise Teddy. We divorced almost five years ago, but I just got sole custody."

Kaya reached out to squeeze Elsbeth's hand as she noticed tears gathering in her eyes.

"I'm okay," Elsbeth said, sniffling. "Sorry, I just get a bit emotional thinking about all that."

"Don't be sorry, I'm sorry for bringing it up..."

"It's okay. Somehow it feels like I've known you much longer than a day," Elsbeth smiled.

"Yeah," Kaya agreed, giving Elsbeth's hand another squeeze.

Just then, the oven timer went off, startling them both. Kaya pulled her hand back, and quickly looked away as Elsbeth jumped up to check on the food.

"Hi."

Kaya looked up and saw Teddy standing on the other side of the living room.

"Hi, Teddy."

"What are you doing here?" he asked a little defensively.

"Teddy!" Elsbeth admonished as she brought dishes to the table. "Kaya's staying for dinner. Look, she fixed the A/C," she nodded at the now working unit.

"Oh," he turned to Kaya. "Thanks."

"Don't mention it," she replied with a smile.

They all sat down to eat. Elsbeth had cooked a simple potato bake with cheese, chicken and carrots, and broccoli on the side.

Teddy ate quietly, shrugging or giving one word answers to Elsbeth's questions. When he finished, he asked to be excused, and with a quick good night to Kaya, hurried back to his room.

"I'm sorry about him," Elsbeth said once Teddy was gone. "He's been... shy—since the custody hearing and everything. I was hoping that being here, away from his dad, might help him open up again."

"I'm sure with some time he'll come around," Kaya said reassuringly. "He must be exhausted from the move—you both must be."

"Yeah," Elsbeth shrugged.

"Let me help you with these." Kaya started gathering their plates and took them to the kitchen. "Do you need me to—"

"I've got this, Kaya, but thank you." Elsbeth put the food dish on the kitchen bench and turned to her new friend. "And thank you, for fixing the A/C," she waved toward the living room.

"It was nothing, really. Happy to do it."

"Can we do this again? Maybe once Teddy's a little more settled..."

"I'd like that," Kaya said, smiling. 

Before Kaya could register what was happening, Elsbeth's arms were wrapped around her waist. She wasn't really a hugger, but as Elsbeth's head rested against her shoulder, she found she didn't mind one bit. After just a few seconds, Elsbeth pulled away, blushing.

"Thanks again. Good night."

"Good night, Elsbeth."

With Kaya gone, Elsbeth headed down the hallway and knocked softly on Teddy's bedroom door, before entering.

"Hey sweetie."

"Hey Mom," Teddy put down his book.

Elsbeth sat beside him against the headboard, placing her arm around his shoulders.

"You okay honey? You were quiet at dinner."

"Yeah, Mom, I'm fine," he replied quietly, but he was leaning into Elsbeth, so she didn't press the point.

They sat there together in silence until Elsbeth noticed Teddy's eyelids get heavy. With a kiss to his forehead, she left him to sleep.

Elsbeth paused in the hallway, the hum of the air conditioner the only sound. She switched it off for the night and set about cleaning up the kitchen. She thought about Kaya, how she'd squeezed her hand on the couch, and Teddy, allowing her to hold him for the first time in a long time. Yes, she thought, this is where we're meant to be.

Chapter Text

The next couple of weeks passed by in a blur—between Teddy starting school, Elsbeth working in a new field of law and Kaya's mix of day and night shifts, there wasn't much time for more than a quick hello in the hallways.

Kaya was just making herself some breakfast when she heard a knock on her door.

"Kaya, hiiii..." it was Elsbeth, dressed in a work suit despite it being Saturday morning.

"Hi Elsbeth, what's up?" Kaya asked cautiously, concerned by her neighbour's flustered appearance.

"I am so sorry to interrupt your Saturday morning, but work's just called me and I have to go in. I was wondering... could you watch Teddy for me? Just for a few hours—I shouldn't be there much later than noon..."

Kaya hesitated—it was her first Saturday off in a while, and she had really been looking forward to ignoring the world for a day. But as she looked into Elsbeth's eyes, wide and pleading, she found she couldn't refuse.

"Yeah, I can do that."

"Oh my gosh, you are saving my life, thank you!" Elsbeth exclaimed. "Teddy!"

Teddy shuffled out of their apartment, hands in his pockets, shoulders slouched.

"Is he okay?" Kaya asked.

"We were supposed to go to Coney Island today," Elsbeth sighed.

"Aw, I used to love Coney Island when I was a kid."

Teddy perked up when he heard Kaya. "Can you take me?"

"Teddy, Kaya doesn't want to—"

"I don't mind," Kaya said, finding herself soften as she saw a smile on Teddy's face for the first time. "I never get to do all this touristy stuff. If that's okay with you, of course," she hurried to add.

"Please, Mom?" Teddy asked, his sneakers making tiny squeaks on the hallway floor as he bounced on his toes.

Elsbeth was torn—she had really been looking forward to their trip to Coney Island, and hated that work was once again causing her to miss out on time with her son. He hadn't been this excited about anything in a while though, and after all he'd been through in the last couple of months, she hated to disappoint him.

"Well, okay, as long as you promise to listen to Kaya..."

"I promise! Thanks Mom!"

"Go get your bag," Elsbeth said, rolling her eyes.

"Should I be regretting this?" Kaya asked dryly as Teddy darted into his apartment, suddenly a whirlwind of energy.

"Maybe," Elsbeth replied with a smile. "Thank you for this. Seriously. When I'm done at the office I can come take him off your hands."

Teddy appeared beside Elsbeth, still grinning ear to ear. With a quick hug, Elsbeth herded him into Kaya's apartment.

"I'll see you in a few hours sweetie, be good for Kaya."

"I will Mom, byyyyeee."

~~~~

"So how are you finding school? You're at Eastgate Elementary, right?" Kaya asked when they sat down to eat lunch.

"It's okay," Teddy said, taking a bite out of his corndog. "My teacher is pretty nice."

"Is Miss Wooller still around—the music teacher?"

"Yeah, she's so mean."

Kaya laughed. "She hasn't changed. I don't think a single student at that school has enjoyed music in decades."

"You went to Eastgate?"

"Yeah, a long time ago. What about the other kids? They nice?"

"Yeah, they're alright. One boy invited me to his birthday party next weekend."

"That's great, Teddy."

"I don't know if I'm gonna go," he mumbled, fiddling with the stick from his corndog.

"Why not?"

Teddy shrugged. "I dunno, I don't really know anyone yet."

"It sounds to me like they want to get to know you better," Kaya said encouragingly.

"I guess so. It just feels... weird. No one really talked to me at my old school."

"Oh, Teddy," Kaya said sadly. "That's—I don't know what to say..."

"It's okay. I'm used to being alone."

"Well, you're not alone now. You have me," Kaya reached her hand across the table.

Teddy smiled shyly, reaching out. "Thanks, Kaya. Can you... not tell my mum about the party?"

"Hmm, okay—but only if you promise to think about going," Kaya squeezed his hand.

"Yeah, okay."

"Want to go down to the beach?"

"Can we get cotton candy first?" Teddy asked, eyes wide.

It was the exact look Elsbeth had given Kaya that morning, and she once again found herself unable to say no.

"Come on," she said, reaching for Teddy's hand.

As they were walking, Kaya felt her phone buzz.

Elsbeth: finally done at the office!!! how is everything??! 🎢

"Smile, Teddy!" Kaya said, and she snapped a picture.

Teddy was smiling, holding up a stick of cotton candy bigger than his head.

Kaya: all good! we're going down to the beach now

Elsbeth: 😍✨💓

Elsbeth: i'll be there in an hour or so

Kaya: ok 🙂 

~~~~

After leaving the office, Elsbeth hurried home to change. She swapped her suit for a light yellow sundress and wrapped a pink scarf around her hair. Her briefcase was left in favour of a couple of colourful tote bags, and in no time she was on the train to Coney Island.

The beach was busy, filled with New Yorkers making the most of a rare warm afternoon in late September. After a couple of minutes strolling along the boardwalk, wind whipping the stray hairs around her face, Elsbeth spotted Kaya sitting on a towel, close to the shore. As she wove through the other beachgoers, she followed Kaya's gaze to the ocean, where Teddy was jumping over shallow waves.

She paused, sneakers digging into the sand. As disappointing as it was to miss the morning with her son, she hadn't dared to imagine him looking this happy. It had been one thing to see him smiling for a picture (which had swiftly been added to her rotation of lock screen images), but seeing his joy in person made her heart ache with everything they'd been through. 

"Elsbeth!"

The sound of her name jolted Elsbeth back to the present. She scanned the beach again and saw Kaya waving her over. She took a deep breath and went to join her on the towel, kicking her shoes off before sitting.

"How was work?" Kaya asked, keeping one eye on Teddy in the waves.

Elsbeth huffed. "Nothing that couldn't have waited till Monday. I know I'm new there, but I think they've forgotten I was on the other side for years. He hasn't been any trouble for you, has he?" she nodded towards the water.

"No trouble at all," Kaya said, smiling. "We went on a couple of rides, played some games. He told me a little about school."

"He did?" Elsbeth asked, itching to know more. "What did he say?"

"Not much," Kaya shrugged, "but it sounds like he's making friends..."

"Oh, that's great." Elsbeth grinned. "He never tells me anything..."

She watched Teddy for another minute, the early afternoon sun shimmering off the waves. "He looks so happy..."

"Hey," Kaya said softly, "he's a great kid, Elsbeth. He'll be okay."

Elsbeth wrapped her arms around her knees, making herself small. "I know, I just—I feel like I missed so much when he was little, and now it's like there's this wall between us, you know? Coming to Coney Island... it was the first thing he's really looked forward to since the move, and now I've missed that too." She sighed, guilt twisting in her stomach. "I was always working, leaving him with the nanny... I promised myself things would be different when we got here. I wouldn't let work consume me like it did back in Chicago, but then today—"

"Elsbeth."

Elsbeth looked away from the waves for a second, meeting Kaya's eyes.

"You're here now, aren't you? He'll remember that."

"How do you know?" Elsbeth's voice was small.

"My dad... he wasn't always around. He worked for UPS, so he was always gone before breakfast, and sometimes didn't make it home for dinner. The holidays were always the busiest time—we would hardly see him. Some years he even worked Christmas day. But in the new year he always spent a whole day with each of us. He always took me ice skating at Central Park," Kaya smiled, remembering cold winter days feeling a little warmer with her father's arm around her shoulders. "We still go—every year."

"Kaya..."

Before Elsbeth could figure out what to say, her attention was torn away.

"MOOOOM!!" Teddy was running towards them. He dropped to his knees in front of Elsbeth, spraying sand everywhere.

"Teddy!" Elsbeth brightened as he reached for her, not even worrying about getting wet. "Have you had fun?"

"Yeah! We went on the spin circuit and the log ride and-and the gravitron... and did you know Kaya's scared of carousels?" Teddy giggled.

Elsbeth looked at Kaya and raised an eyebrow. "She is?"

"Hey! I'm not scared!" Kaya said defensively. "The animals—they're creepy..."

Elsbeth laughed.

"Can we go on it, Mom? Before we go home?"

"I'd love to, honey. Let's get you dry first."

The three of the walked to the change rooms, Teddy in the middle, animatedly explaining the carnival games to his mother.

"You don't have to stay," Elsbeth said to Kaya as they waited for Teddy to change.

"I don't mind," Kaya replied. "Unless... you want me to go?"

"No!" Elsbeth said quickly. "Please, stay. I mean—I think Teddy likes having you here..." she trailed off, a little shy.

"Okay then."

They found the carousel, and Kaya watched as mother and son went round in circles—holding on, laughing together. She'd never really thought about having a family of her own—never dated, not seriously, and always felt exhausted after spending an afternoon with her nieces. But something about spending time with Teddy, making him smile—it made her feel like she was part of something, and it didn't scare her.

Elsbeth... there was just something about her. Kaya wanted to know her, and tell her everything—even things she'd kept to herself for as long as she could remember. And it felt like Elsbeth needed someone too. Someone to tell her she didn’t have to do it all on her own. Someone who gave her space to breathe, so she could finally let go, even for just a moment.

Nothing had changed for Kaya, not really. Same job, same apartment, same city. But meeting these two wonderful people, being part of their world—it was making everything feel new again.

On the train home, Teddy sat wedged between them, leaning sleepily into Elsbeth, her arm around his shoulders. 

"Hey Mom," he mumbled.

"Yeah, sweetie?"

"Someone invited me to a birthday party next weekend..."

"Oh, Teddy, that's wonderful."

"So I can go?"

"Of course, baby."

"Thanks, Mom." Teddy wrapped his arm around Elsbeth's waist and leaned in closer.

Elsbeth looked at Kaya, tears gathering in her eyes. Kaya met her eyes and gave her a steady smile—as if to say, see, you're doing just fine.

Chapter Text

"Teddy, look at this!"

Teddy looked up from his homework as Elsbeth sat beside him at the dining table. She held out her phone.

"Kaya got a puppy?" he asked, scrolling through the photos.

It was a little brown dog, with a rounded snout and black tips on its ears—curled in a dog bed, sitting on Kaya's lap, a selfie of them in the precinct.

"I'm not sure," Elsbeth tapped her lips. "See, she's still at work..." She pressed the call button and switched on video.

"Kaya!" Teddy shouted when she answered. "you got a puppy?!"

"Shh, she's sleeping," Kaya said quietly, tilting the screen down to show the pup in her lap.

"Sorry! What's her name?"

"Gonzo, she's a border terrier. Just a couple of months old." Kaya brought the phone up to show her face again.

"Why do you have her?"

"She's... related to a case. She was missing and just got handed in today. We're trying to figure out what to do with her tonight." She decided to leave the fact that her owner was brutally murdered with a cattle prod out for now.

"You should bring her here. Right Mom?"

The video panned to Elsbeth. Kaya expected her to say no, to tell Teddy that they couldn't just get a dog, even if it was for only one night... But Elsbeth's expression matched Teddy's, like there was absolutely nothing she'd rather do.

"O...kay... I'll let the captain know."

Both Tascionis beamed

~~~~

"He's going to be devastated when you find her owner," Elsbeth said to Kaya.

After getting the all clear that Kaya could bring Gonzo home, Elsbeth and Teddy had gone out to buy toys, blankets, food and anything else they might need. When Kaya had knocked on the door, Teddy had been there in no time, ready to spoil his new best friend. He was currently playing with her on the living room floor, both overflowing with energy. Elsbeth had poured herself and Kaya a glass of wine and they were watching from the kitchen.

"No one told you to go and buy out the petstore!" Kaya laughed. "It was only supposed to be for one night."

"The toys were just so cute, I couldn't resist," said Elsbeth.

"Anyway, we won't be finding her owner..."

"What do you mean?"

"Well, we already found him. I didn't want to say anything in front of Teddy... but we're investigating his murder."

Elsbeth gasped, a hand flying to her mouth. "What happened?" she asked quietly.

"I can't say much since it's ongoing... but whoever did it left almost no trace and took Gonzo. It was a couple of days before she was found."

"Oh my goodness, that's awful. But..." a sly grin spread across Elsbeth's face, "sounds like we have a dog now."

~~~~

Kaya was already at the precinct the next morning when she received a text from Elsbeth.

Elsbeth: couldn't find my keys this morning...

Then a couple of photos came through, one of Gonzo dragging a Statue of Liberty headband towards the stove, the next of a couple of toys under the stove—sitting amongst them: Elsbeth's keys.

Kaya: haha, cheeky pup! 🐶

She was about to put her phone away, but hesitated. Gonzo had only been at the Tascionis' for one night and had already found a hiding spot. Did they check under the stove at the crime scene? It was a long shot but... Kaya went to find Detective Edwards.

~~~~

"So you know how Gonzo was hiding things under your stove?" Kaya asked a couple of days later, once Teddy had gone to bed.

"Don't remind me," Elsbeth laughed.

"Well... I showed it to the lead detective and we went back to the scene. Turns out Gonzo was hiding things under the stove there, too."

"Oh?"

"We found a headband, with the victim's blood on it. It had to have been from that night. We found a hair on it too, which we matched to this tech entrepreneur who showed up the day after the murder," Kaya explained. "She'd claimed she'd never been to his apartment before. Apparently the victim was about to publish an exposé which would have ruined her start up—so she fabricated a string of dognappings and then used the same MO to kill him."

"Kaya!" Elsbeth exclaimed.

"What?"

"You solved it!"

Kaya shrugged. "I guess."

"You're going to make detective in no time!" Elsbeth announced proudly.

"I haven't even taken the exam yet..." Kaya mumbled, blushing—embarrassed at how much Elsbeth's praise made her heart swell.

"Don't be so modest. Detective Kaya has a nice ring to it."

"Elsbeth," Kaya rolled her eyes. "I better get home. Early shift again tomorrow."

Elsbeth sighed. "Alright."

It was getting harder to say goodbye at the end of their nights together, even though they were always just across the hall. Some nights Elsbeth almost forgot Kaya had her own apartment... Sometimes she indulged herself, and imagined what it would be like to curl up with Kaya in bed, keeping each other warm as winter approached.

But she always snapped herself out of it. Kaya doesn't want you like that, she'd tell herself. She came with a lot of baggage—a divorce, a kid—it was too much. She couldn't let herself hope for something she could never have. 

As Elsbeth pulled Kaya in for a goodbye hug, she breathed deeply, trying to memorise her scent, the way their bodies fit together.

"Good night, Els," Kaya said softly, pulling away and looking into Elsbeth's eyes.

"Night, Kaya," Elsbeth replied, already missing the warmth—and wishing she were brave enough to ask her to stay.

Chapter Text

Kaya heard a couple of short barks, then "Gonzo... Gonzo let go" coming from the hallway. She stuck her head out to see Elsbeth fighting with the growling pup over a box of tissues, while trying to balance a full bag of groceries. Kaya rushed over and scooped Gonzo into her arms, gently prying the box from his jaw.

"Everything okay?" she asked.

Elsbeth's shoulders slumped as she unlocked the door. "No," she sniffled. "Teddy's sick. Gonzo's going stir crazy because I haven't been able to take her out for a proper walk."

Kaya examined her neighbour's face. She looked tired, her eyes a little bloodshot. The tip of her nose was a bit pink. Kaya shifted Gonzo to under one arm and reached out to feel Elsbeth's forehead.

"Els, you're burning up! Come on, you need to get back to bed." Kaya guided Elsbeth inside, letting Gonzo down once the door was closed.

"I'm fine," Elsbeth insisted, then sneezed.

"I think you've caught whatever Teddy's got. Look, I'll look after all this, you just get some rest."

"I was going to make soup..." Elsbeth protested weakly.

"I can do that, come on."

With a hand on Elsbeth's waist, Kaya led her to her bedroom.

"There's chicken in the fridge..." Elsbeth said sleepily as she climbed into bed.

"Okay," Kaya said gently.

As she turned to leave, Kaya paused. She'd never been in Elsbeth's bedroom before. For a short-term rental, she'd managed to make it surprisingly personal. Colourful paintings covered almost one entire wall, and various knickknacks were scatted over every flat surface. It was a stark contrast from the tidiness of the living room (dog toys notwithstanding).

Before going back to the kitchen, Kaya knocked on Teddy's door.

"Mom?"

"It's me," Kaya said as she entered.

"Kaya?" Teddy blinked, sitting up in bed.

"Yeah, your mom caught your cold. How are you feeling?"

"Better... just a bit tired."

"Okay, just stay in bed a little longer, and I'll take Gonzo out for a bit. Then I'll come back and make lunch."

"Mmkay."

"Did your mom already call the school?"

"Yeah, I think so."

"Okay, rest up." Kaya waited for Teddy to lie back down then left the room.

In the living room, Gonzo was fighting with one of her many toys, her leash trailing behind her.

"Come on, Gonzo. Let's go to the park," Kaya announced, grabbing Elsbeth's keys.

Apparently Gonzo knew exactly what park meant, because her ears perked up and she trotted to Kaya's feet, all traces of mischief gone.

There was an off leash area a couple of blocks away, and Gonzo started bouncing around as they approached. Clearly this was a favourite spot. There weren't too many other dogs around since it was late morning on a Monday, so Kaya let Gonzo off her leash and waited while she tired herself out running.

After about half an hour, they headed back to the apartment. Gonzo curled up for a nap, and Kaya started on the soup. She chopped onions, celery, and carrots, and dropped them into a pot with the last of a rotisserie chicken she found in the fridge. After covering everything with water, she sprinkled in some dried herbs and left it to simmer on the stove. She settled onto the couch and switched on the TV.

"Kaya?"

"Hey kiddo, how're you feeling?"

Teddy shuffled into the living room and sat beside her. "Good."

"Hungry? That soup should be ready soon."

Teddy made a face. "I don't really like soup. Can I have a sandwich?"

Kaya laughed. Wasn't the soup supposed to be for Teddy? "Sure."

She checked on the soup, stirred it and added the noodles . It smelt great. Then she made Teddy's sandwich, and one for herself.

When the noodles were soft, Kaya served up a bowl and took it to Elsbeth's room.

"Hey, sleepyhead," she said quietly.

Elsbeth stirred. "Kaya?"

Kaya cleared a space on the side table and put the bowl down, then sat down on the edge of the bed.

"How are you feeling?" she asked.

"Sick," Elsbeth admitted, sitting up. "Everything hurts."

"Here, take some of these," Kaya said, popping out some tylenol. "Should help with the fever too."

"Thank youuu..." Elsbeth swallowed the pills, then took a sip of her soup. "Oh my gosh, Kaya, this is amazing... I should let you cook more often. Is Teddy up?"

"Yeah, he's having lunch. I think he'll be able to go to school tomorrow."

"Oh, good, then I can go back to the office..."

"Hmm, we'll see. I think you'll need another day to rest."

Elsbeth huffed, which turned into a yawn. Kaya raised an eyebrow... Elsbeth said nothing, just finished her soup.

Kaya went back to the living room, and sat down on the couch with her sandwich. Teddy stretched out beside her with Gonzo, his feet lightly bumping her thigh. The three of them dozed in front of some cartoons until it was time for dinner. At some point, Gonzo wandered off, and Teddy turned to lay his head in Kaya's lap. She stroked his hair, marvelling at how quickly he'd come to trust her—miles from the closed off kid she'd met outside their building a few short months ago.

"Kaya?"

"Yeah, bud?"

"Is my mom going to be mad at me for making her sick?"

"Of course not, Teddy, why would you think that?"

"Cause she had to miss work..."

"Oh, buddy, no. That's just something that happens when you have a kid. She knows that."

"I used to always stay with the nanny when I was sick. She hated missing work." He wrinkled his nose.

"Everyone gets sick kiddo, and yeah, sometimes work has to wait. But your mom's been trying not to work as much as she used to, remember?"

"Yeah, I know," he mumbled.

"And trust me," Kaya poked his side lightly, "work wouldn't have wanted her there like this."

Teddy laughed.

Later, Kaya waited for Teddy to get ready for bed, then went to see Elsbeth again. Used tissues littered the floor around the bed, and Kaya scooped them into the bin.

"Hey, honey, Teddy's in bed, so I'm going to go home. I'll check on you both in the morning."

Elsbeth groaned softly, and an arm reached out from under the blankets. She grabbed Kaya's hand, and tugged her towards the bed. Kaya sat down on the edge.

"Come here," Elsbeth mumbled, rolling over to make room.

Kaya lay down awkwardly on top of the blankets, and Elsbeth sighed contentedly.

"Thanks for looking after us today. I'll make it up to you in the morning."

"Make it up to me by getting better, okay?" Kaya said softly.

"Hmmm."

Kaya waited for Elsbeth to go to sleep, then slowly got out of bed, trying not to disturb the blankets. She's sick and delirious, Kaya told herself, she doesn't really want you spending the night in her bed. And since when do you call her honey?

~~~~

By early afternoon, Elsbeth stirred, finally feeling almost human again. Sunlight was streaming in between the cracks in the blinds, and there was an empty tea cup by her bed that she didn't remember making. 

She stretched as she got out of bed, stiff from spending so long lying still. She wrapped a fluffy robe around herself—over the pink sweatsuit she'd worn to buy groceries yesterday morning—and padded to Teddy's room.

She knocked, and at the lack of response opened the door. His bed was made.

"Teddy?" she called, walking down the hall. "Gonzo? Teddy?!"

Elsbeth started panicking—had Teddy taken the pup out on his own? She'd told him a million times not to do that... No new messages on her phone... She grabbed her keys and rushed across the hall to Kaya's.

Kaya was at home, listening to music, getting a few of the chores done that she should have done yesterday. A rapid knock on the door startled her, then she heard her name, urgent and panicked. She put down her laundry and went to the door, Gonzo hot on her heels.

"Teddy's gone! And Gonzo—" words tumbled from Elsbeth's mouth as soon as Kaya opened the door.

"Els, Teddy's at school," Kaya said calmly. "Gonzo's here. Take a breath." She reached out to Elsbeth's shoulder, trying to be reassuring.

"What—how?!"

"I took him—we came to say goodbye before we left. I'm sorry, I didn't think you wouldn't remember, I should've left a note."

Elsbeth's shoulders finally relaxed. "The tea...?"

"Yeah, that was me."

"Oh."

"Come here," Kaya said, pulling Elsbeth into an embrace.

"Shouldn't you be at work today?" Elsbeth asked.

Over the past couple of months, Kaya had made a habit of sharing her schedule, and Elsbeth had started memorising it, something she found slightly embarrassing.

"I took a personal day."

Elsbeth pulled back, a crease forming between her eyebrows. "Kaya, you shouldn't have done that."

"I wanted to. You needed me."

"Who said I needed you?" Elsbeth took a step back, brushing off Kaya's hands.

Kaya blinked, thrown. Elsbeth was usually so warm—she didn't know where this was coming from.

"Elsbeth, you couldn't even remember me taking Teddy to school," she tried to reason.

"I would have managed. We're not—we're not your responsibility."

Kaya scoffed. "That's rich, coming from the one who told Teddy's school I'm his 'step-parent'."

The colour drained from Elsbeth's face. "I—I—" she stuttered.

"Yeah, it was a real shock when I introduced myself to Teddy's teacher to see if I needed you to call so I could pick him up, only to find out I've been his second emergency contact for months. I mean, I must have barely known you when you did that."

Elsbeth looked away, embarrassment written across her face. "I'm so sorry Kaya, I should've told you. I didn't know anyone else in the city, and I knew you were a police officer... They didn't have 'neighbour' on the form, so I just chose the next plausible option... obviously 'grandparent' was out..." Elsbeth offered a small smile.

"They didn't have 'friend'?" Kaya asked, raising an eyebrow.

"I thought step-parent might be taken more seriously—I don't know what I was thinking. I'll ask them to change it, say I ticked the wrong box."

"You don't have to do that," Kaya backtracked. As embarrassing as it had been in the moment, it had been even more heartwarming to feel like an important part of Teddy's—and by extension Elsbeth's—world.

"Um, okay. And... I'm sorry. I really do appreciate everything. I just—sometimes it's hard for me to believe somebody actually wants to help me," Elsbeth admitted.

"Well, I do," Kaya said, shrugging bashfully. "And you know I—I love Teddy. I'd do anything for him."

"Oh, Kaya," Elsbeth whispered, a mix of guilt and affection in her voice.

She pulled Kaya back into a hug, clinging on tightly. Kaya rubbed her back.

"You know, I was going to head down to the school soon. If you're feeling up for it, maybe we could go together? I told Teddy we could take Gonzo to the dog park on the way home."

"You don't mind if people think..." Elsbeth trailed off.

"Let them," Kaya said, trying to sound casual. Really, her pulse was racing at the idea. People already thought they were together, and maybe part of her wanted it to be true.

"Okay, I'll have a quick shower, then come back," Elsbeth said, giving Kaya a final squeeze before she let go.

Kaya went back inside, leaning against the closed door, trying to get her heartrate under control. What was she doing before Elsbeth came over, again?

Chapter Text

When Kaya got home in the evening, she went straight to the fridge, took out a beer and flopped down on the sofa. She didn't usually drink much, and almost never on a work night, but after the day she'd had, she needed it.

After solving the case of Gonzo's dognapping (slash the murder of her owner), Captain Wagner had been assigning Kaya to more high profile cases, shadowing some of his best detectives. She'd seen a lot over her years on the force, but nothing had quite prepared her for what she had been faced with today.

At around six, she'd texted Elsbeth to let her know she wouldn't be making it to dinner that evening. Even though they now ate together a couple of times a week, she found herself feeling inexplicably disappointed to miss out on what she had come to think of as 'family dinner'. She'd listen intently as Teddy recalled his schoolyard antics, smiling along with Elsbeth as familiar names started coming up week after week. He was blossoming in New York, and every time he shared something good, Kaya could see Elsbeth relax a little more.

Kaya went to take another sip of her beer, and found it empty already. That was quick. She got up, debating whether to have another or actually find something for dinner, but before she could make up her mind, there was a knock at her door.

"I saved you some dinner," Elsbeth said once Kaya answered. She held up a plate.

"Oh, you didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to," Elsbeth shrugged, smiling.

Kaya took the plate, and they stood there awkwardly for a minute.

"Do you, um, want to come in?" Kaya asked. "Have a drink?"

Elsbeth's eyes flickered to the empty beer bottle in Kaya's other hand.

"I was going to switch to water," Kaya said quickly.

"Okay," Elsbeth said, and followed her inside.

Once Kaya reheated her food, they sat on the sofa, a little closer than necessary but still not quite touching

"Was everything okay with work today?" Elsbeth asked after a while. "It's not like you to stay so late..."

Kaya swallowed a forkful of vegetables. "Not really." She kept her eyes on her plate.

"Oh, Kaya," Elsbeth wanted to reach out and hold her, but she held herself back. Something was off tonight. Kaya didn't seem like herself—closed off, tense.

Kaya shrugged. "That's the job."

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Kaya didn't answer right away. She scraped up the last of her dinner, swallowed, then leaned back into the sofa and finished her water. The question hung heavy between them. Elsbeth just waited till she was ready to speak.

"I saw... something horrible today," Kaya finally started. She glanced at Elsbeth, who nodded. She continued slowly, "There was a boy, and his mom, they were—her husband—" Kaya choked back a sob.

She was exhausted—not just from the long day, but from holding back how she really felt—and the dam finally broke. Elsbeth shifted closer, finally wrapping her arm around Kaya's shoulders and pulling her close. She'd never seen her cry before, she was usually such a solid, steady presence when emotions were high, always knowing just what to say.

"It's okay, honey, let it out."

"When I saw them..." Kaya said, voice muffled against Elsbeth's shoulder. "For a second, I thought it was Teddy, and you... I don't know why, they looked nothing like you. The kid was only little. They were covered in bruises, some old, some fresh. Social services said the wife had finally secured a safe place to take her son. We don't know if he found out, or just came home early..."

Elsbeth felt tears prick her eyes. It was a horrible thing to think about, someone hurting their partner, their child—the people they were supposed to care about the most. Her situation had been different, but still, something about it hit too close to home. It hurt to think about how much pain Teddy had been hiding back in Chicago, and how much she might have missed.

"We're safe, hon," Elsbeth cooed, rubbing Kaya's back, her arms. "We're okay."

"I know, I know," Kaya sniffled. "I just couldn't get the image out of my mind."

"Did you catch him?" Elsbeth asked. "The husband, I mean."

"Yeah," Kaya said softly. "They brought him in around eight. He was trying to leave the state, but we got a call in about his plates at a diner."

They were silent for a while, quiet tears falling down their cheeks. Elsbeth's arms stayed around Kaya, and eventually, once her breathing evened out, Kaya rested her head on Elsbeth's shoulder.

"I know you said he wasn't abusive..." Kaya started carefully. "But was there more to why you wanted sole custody, so many years after the divorce?"

Elsbeth let out a long breath. It was hard to talk about, even after all this time. She still held onto a lot of guilt over what her son had been through. But this was Kaya, and it was hard not to share a little more, when they already shared so much of their lives.

"He wasn't, I mean, he never laid a hand on us, ever. We had shared custody, but Teddy was with me most of the time. Michael was older than me, head of his firm. He worked even more than me, if you can believe it. I think I always knew it wasn't the best place for Teddy—like I said before, we disagreed on how to raise him—but I fooled myself into thinking that he needed time with his dad, that two parents apart were better than just a single mom. And a silly part of me felt like the 'good' parent. Sure, I was at the office late most nights, but Michael worked almost every weekend too. I convinced myself that meant I was doing enough, even though I knew I wasn’t.

"A couple of years ago... Teddy started refusing to go to his dad's. It was awful—a kid shouldn't be having panic attacks at eight years old... not over seeing someone who was supposed to love them. So we went back to court. Michael didn't fight it, not really. I hated him a little bit for letting go so easily. For not even trying to fight for him. I'm grateful for it now, obviously. Every day we're here I wish I'd fought for him sooner. He's changed so much in these months—you saw how he was when we moved in."

Kaya let her finish without interrupting, taking it all in. It was the most Elsbeth had ever shared about her ex and the custody case, but still, it felt like she was holding something back.

When Kaya didn't say anything, Elsbeth continued softly, "And so much of that is thanks to you, Kaya."

"Elsbeth, I can't—" Kaya protested.

"No, Kaya, please. You've made him—both of us—feel so safe here. I don't know where we'd be without you..."

Kaya smiled. "I'm really glad I met you too," she said softly.

"You want to know the worst part about today?" Kaya asked after a couple of minutes.

"Hmm?"

"There was this new ME assistant on the scene today. He tried to ask me out while they were wheeling the bodies away."

"No," Elsbeth sat up, turning her body to face Kaya. "He didn't."

"He did. Right in front of the detectives, the techs—they were making fun of me all afternoon. I was trying to hold it together at my desk while it spread around the station."

Elsbeth frowned. "You shouldn't have to go through that at work, Kaya."

"I know they were just ribbing me, it's just what we do. It wouldn't usually get to me. But the timing of it all just sucked."

"So did you say yes?" Elsbeth couldn't help but ask.

"What?"

"To the date. Are you interested in him?

Kaya barked out a laugh. "Maybe in another life, one where he had an ounce of tact."

"Oh," Elsbeth forced a laugh, not sure if that was a good or bad thing. "So... other than that, he's your type?"

Kaya ignored the question. "Elsbeth... I'm... not interested in meeting anyone new right now."

She was teetering right on the edge of a confession, almost certain she wasn't reading things wrong at this point. But it didn't feel like the right time. She hoped Elsbeth could hear what she wanted to say: I don't want anyone new, because I've already met you. I already have you, I think.

Elsbeth let out a shaky breath, afraid to believe what she thought Kaya might be saying. "I should—I should get back... to Teddy..."

"Right, of course..."

Reluctantly, they pulled apart, instantly missing the contact.

"I'll clean these and bring them over later," Kaya said, waving at the plates Elsbeth had brought over.

With Elsbeth gone, Kaya showered, and got ready for bed. Somehow, even though it was late, she didn't feel quite so tired anymore. She fell asleep thinking about Elsbeth's arms around her—warm, safe, somewhere that was starting to feel like home.

Chapter Text

"That was quick," Kaya said as she opened her door, not thirty seconds after buzzing her friend into the building.

"Hi Kaya!" Teddy was grinning at her from the doorway, hands clasped behind his back.

"Oh, hi Teddy. What's up?

"Sooo..." he rocked back and forth on his toes. "Its my birthday tomorrow..."

"It is? Why didn't you tell me?" Kaya feigned surprise. In reality, Elsbeth had told her two months ago so she could keep the day free.

"You don't have to go to work, do you?" Teddy asked, suddenly anxious.

"No, kiddo, luckily I've got the whole day off."

"Good!" he brightened again. "We're gonna go to the movies, then we're gonna take the Roosevelt Island tram!"

"The tram?" Kaya raised an eyebrow. "I thought you didn't like heights?"

"I don't..." Teddy said slowly. "But I'm turning ten, so I don't think I'll be scared anymore."

Kaya held back a laugh at his kid logic, nodding. "Okay, but just one more question: what movie are we seeing?"

"The new Spiderman!"

"Oh, you know I've been wanting to see that! Okay, I'm in," Kaya held her hand out for a fist bump, which Teddy readily returned.

Just then, Kaya's friend reached their floor.

"Hey Nikki!" Kaya called.

Teddy swivelled, eyes widening at the sight of the new person. They had a bleached buzz cut, and were dressed in a hoodie and baggy jeans.

"Nikki, this is Teddy, my neighbour," Kaya introduced them. "Teddy, this is Nikki."

"Hiya," Teddy said shyly.

"Oh, hey, are you the neighbour who adopted Gonzo?"

Teddy perked up at this. "Yes! Do you want to see her?"

"I would love to! I wanted to take her, but my building doesn't allow pets..."

"Yeah, when we move, we have to find some place that will allow her..." Teddy said over his shoulder as he opened his door. "Gonzo!" he called into the apartment. "Hey, girl!"

Gonzo came scampering out, eyes darting around the hallway. She usually didn't come out without her leash. Teddy gathered her into his arms.

"Oh, she's grown so much!" Nikki said, reaching out to pet her.

"Teddy, what are you—oh!" Elsbeth appeared in the doorway. She looked the stranger up and down, noting the brown bag in their hand. "Hello..."

"Mom, this is Nikki," Teddy said.

"Hi, um, I'm just visiting Kaya," Nikki hitched a thumb over their shoulder to Kaya's door, where their friend had been standing a moment ago.

"Oh, of course... I'm Elsbeth," she said, and shook Nikki's hand.

"Nice to finally meet you," said Nikki. At Elsbeth's puzzled expression, they continued, "Kaya's mentioned you a couple of times at work. You know, updating us about Gonzo... Anyway, I should..." they trailed off and waved towards Kaya's.

Kaya barely registered the click of the door.

When we move… Teddy had said it so casually, like it was already decided. She knew they were only renting here short-term, but she hadn’t really thought about when that might end, or where they might go. About them actually leaving.

Where would that leave her?

"Okay, I get it now," Nikki said, breaking through Kaya's thoughts.

"What?"

"She's hot."

Kaya blushed, "Nikki, I don't—"

"Kay, come on. I'd literally never heard you mention anyone from outside work till they came along. Admit it—you've got yourself a milf," Nikki crossed their arms, looking smug.

"Don't call her that," Kaya protested.

"You're not denying it!" Nikki teased. "You're totally into her."

"I'm... yeah," Kaya conceded, dropping onto the couch. "Sometimes I think she feels the same but... I said something to her last week and she practically ran away."

"Hmm..." Nikki entered the living room, armed with a couple of wine glasses. They poured one and handed it to Kaya. "Drink first, then tell me exactly what you said."

Kaya downed half the glass in one go, then placed it on the coffee table. "I thought tonight was supposed to be about you?"

"Please, I've cried about Dylan enough. Give me something else to focus on. Now, what did you say to her?"

Kaya groaned. "Okay, I was telling her about that horrible DV case last week..."

"Not exactly the ideal time to declare your love," Nikki interrupted.

"Let me get to it! So I told her about that ME trying to hit on me over a body."

"Classy," Nikki rolled their eyes.

"Then she asked me if I was going to go out with him, and if he was my type... I thought maybe she was jealous, so I told her I wasn't looking to meet anyone new... and then she just left."

"Oh my god, dude! Cryptic, much? She probably thinks you don't want to date anyone right now!"

"Do you think so?"

"Yeah, Kay, I do. Or she's just as useless as you... Actually, that could be it..." Nikki trailed off thoughtfully.

"I don't know, Nik. What if I say something and she rejects me. She’s got a kid. Maybe she doesn’t want to complicate things with a relationship."

Nikki looked squarely at Kaya. "You mean the kid that just invited you to spend his birthday with them?" they deadpanned.

Kaya pursed her lips—she couldn't argue with that.

Nikki softened at the uncertainty on Kaya's face.

"You always do this Kaya."

"Do what?"

"Make excuses, keep yourself on the outside. You know, not going after what you really want."

"I don't know what you're talking about..."

"Please," Nikki scoffed, "What happened to making detective? You still haven't taken the exam, and you know the Captain wants you to.

"Nikki..." Kaya didn't want to admit they were right.

"Kaya, trust me, okay."

"I'll think about it," Kaya said. And she would—in fact she wasn't sure she would be able to stop thinking about it. Whether she would say anything... that was another matter.

Kaya picked up the remote and navigated to the new season of Lavish Ladies. "Now, are we going to watch this, or what?"

Chapter Text

Saturday rolled around, and Kaya woke up with Nikki's words on her mind. Truthfully, she hadn't been able to concentrate on the television, and more than once had been caught staring blankly into space. She'd apologised, but Nikki had just laughed it off. It's nice see you like this, they'd said.

"I have feelings for Elsbeth," she whispered to her empty bedroom, testing how it felt to say out loud.

It felt good. Her heartrate picked up as she thought about the woman across the hall. She wanted to believe Nikki, that Elsbeth hadn't been running away because she didn't feel the same. Kaya knew it was real, that pull she felt between them whenever they were together—especially when they were alone.

But Teddy's words still haunted her. When we move... Had they found a place? Were they set to leave any day now? No. Elsbeth would have told her... Kaya hated the thought of them moving on without her, of being kept in the dark until the boxes were packed and the truck was ready. Without so much as a goodbye.

Kaya pushed her feelings down, shoving them into a box not to be opened for the next few hours. Today was about Teddy.

After a quick birthday brunch (Elsbeth made pancakes), the three of them walked down to the cinema. Teddy sat in between Kaya and Elsbeth with a huge box of popcorn balanced on his knees.

"Was that your girlfriend, Kaya?" Teddy asked as the ads started playing.

"Who?" Kaya turned to Teddy, and out of the corner of her eye, caught Elsbeth mouthing 'sorry'. It was hard to tell in the low lighting, but Kaya thought she was blushing a little.

"That girl that came over yesterday? Are you dating her?"

Kaya hesitated for a second, caught off-guard by the question. Teddy had never asked about her love life before, not that there was really much to tell.

"You mean Nikki? They're just a friend from work," Kaya said. "And Nikki's not a girl, they use they/them pronouns."

"Oh," Teddy turned to his mom, smiling. "Like Tina."

Kaya raised an eyebrow.

"Someone from Chicago," Elsbeth supplied vaguely.

"So you're not dating anyone, right Kaya?" Teddy pressed.

"Don't you think you would know if I were, buddy?"

Teddy shrugged. "Yeah, I guess we wouldn't see you so much."

"No, silly," Kaya laughed, "because I would tell you."

"Oh."

"It wouldn't stop me from hanging out with you."

"Promise?"

"Yeah, I promise."

The lights in the theater dimmed, and they all settled into silence.

About halfway through the film, Teddy leaned his head against Elsbeth's side. As she reached an arm around his shoulders, her fingers brushed Kaya's arm.

Kaya didn't pull away. The brief contact sent a shiver down her spine. She turned, and caught Elsbeth staring at her through the darkness.

They held each other's gaze for a moment. A soft smile appeared on Elsbeth's face before she turned back to the movie. The corners of Kaya's lips curved upwards too, and stayed that way until the credits rolled.

~~~~

"Mom, I have to pee," Teddy said as they filed out of the theatre.

"Okay, let's go," Elsbeth reached for his hand, but Teddy pulled away.

"I'm going in the boys'," he said firmly, turning away.

Elsbeth grabbed his arm. "Teddy, we've been through this," she said exasperatedly.

"But I'm ten now..." he whined.

"I'm sorry baby but you still can't go in there alone."

A series of emotions flashed across Teddy's face: annoyance, frustration and a little bit of anger. Most prominently, anxiety. Kaya recognised that look—it was the same one he'd worn when she'd taken him to change on Coney Island, before she'd pointed out the single stalls a little way down the beach.

"Elsbeth," Kaya interrupted. Both Tascionis turned to her. "There's a cafe down the block that I like. How about we get a coffee?"

Elsbeth stared at her, puzzled, a little annoyed, as if Kaya had just suggested they go swimming in the East River. 

"They have a restroom there," Kaya hinted.

After a second, it seemed to click in Elsbeth's mind, and she nodded. "Oh... coffee sounds good."

She turned to Teddy, who was still looking at Kaya. "Can I get a milkshake?" he asked, all traces of stress gone from his voice.

Kaya glanced at Elsbeth, who nodded slightly. "Sure, kiddo," Kaya said, reaching for his hand.

After they sat down, ordered, and Teddy had ducked off, Kaya exhaled. She met Elsbeth's eyes.

"So, you're moving soon?" Kaya asked, her voice straining at the end of the question. Amid the boom of the cinema speakers, her mind had wandered, peeling back the tape on the box she'd tried so hard to seal that question in. With Teddy gone, she couldn't hold it back.

Elsbeth blinked, caught off guard by the question and Kaya's tone. "No—I mean, not yet. I haven't found the right place yet..."

"Oh, okay, but you're still planning to...?"

"Well... yes, eventually we will. Is everything okay, Kaya?"

"Yeah..." Kaya fidgeted. "Teddy just said you were looking for a place that would let you keep Gonzo..."

Elsbeth paused as their drinks were delivered to the table. Kaya grabbed her mug, grateful for something to do with her hands, and sipped her coffee.

"I guess I must have said something to him when we got her," Elsbeth shrugged. "You'll know when I find somewhere, Kaya, really. I haven't had much time to look lately..."

Kaya stared down at her drink, feeling relief and embarrassment twist in her stomach. No—relief wasn't quite right. It wasn't happening right now, but time would fly, and eventually they would be gone. Before she could apologise for bringing it up, try to hide how much it was eating at her, Teddy was back at the table, chattering about the movie and sipping his milkshake.

Kaya pushed her feelings back into their box and rejoined the conversation.

~~~~

They ended up staying at the cafe for lunch, then took the subway down to the tram station. It wasn't too busy in the middle of the afternoon, and they only waited a short while to board. Kaya, of course, had taken the tram a couple of times before, so she was happy to watch the Tascionis experience it for the first time.

As the ride got underway, the tram jerked slightly as it pulled out of the station. Elsbeth had her phone out, taking photos as they moved towards the river. Teddy reached for Kaya as they swayed, and she squeezed his hand. He still had a smile on his face, although it faltered a little as the water became visible from all sides.

A minute or two passed, and Kaya felt Teddy's grip tightening.

"You okay, buddy?" she asked.

"Yeah," he answered, but his voice was shaking. He'd turned away from the window.

"Hey," Kaya said gently, kneeling down in front of Teddy, and guiding him to sit down. "We're almost there. Just keep your eyes on me."

"We're really high up."

"Yeah, we're up pretty high, but we're safe. Just keep breathing, okay?"

Teddy’s grip loosened slightly, but his shoulders remained tense. Slowly, his breathing steadied, and he looked up at Kaya.

"Okay."

"Teddy, look, I can almost see—" Elsbeth swivelled around, pointing at something in the distance. Her hand dropped when she saw Teddy's focus on Kaya. Her heart dropped as she realised she'd forgotten about her son's fears in her excitement. She rushed towards them.

"Teddy? Sweetie?" she wrapped an arm around his shoulders, and he sagged into her.

"Mom..."

"I'm here baby, are you okay?"

"Yeah... Kaya was here," he said, his voice more steady now. "Did you see the Statue of Liberty?"

"Don't worry about that, honey." Elsbeth rubbed Teddy's arm, and looked at Kaya, who had moved to sit beside Teddy. "Thank you," she mouthed.

Teddy stiffened as the cabin shook, before coming to a stop.

"Is it over?" he asked.

"Sure is, sweetie," Elsbeth offered him a hand up, and they all disembarked.

When they made it down to the park, Teddy stared up at the tram on its way back to the mainland.

"That wasn't so bad."

Elsbeth and Kaya shared a look.

"Too bad there's no tram back to Queens, huh?" Kaya said with a smile. "Guess we're stuck taking the train home."

~~~~

Later, after wandering the island for a while and watching the sunset over the water, they headed home. They ate takeout on the couch in front of a movie, then Teddy lay with his head in one lap and his feet in the other, dozing. Elsbeth turned the volume down.

"Thank you for everything today, Kaya," she said quietly. "I can't believe I got so swept up that I forgot to check on him," she stroked Teddy's arm, guilt still lingering in her chest.

"He would’ve gone to you, if I wasn't there," Kaya murmured. When the crease between Elsbeth's eyebrows didn't disappear, she continued, "You’re his mom. He trusts you."

"Yeah..." Elsbeth exhaled, her gaze dropping briefly to Teddy before looking back at Kaya. "I hope that’s true."

Teddy stirred in Elsbeth's lap, blinking open his eyes.

"Honey, why don't you go get ready for bed? I'll come in in a few minutes," Elsbeth said.

"Mmkay," Teddy stood up drowsily. "Bye, Kaya," he said, and to her surprise, he leaned in for a hug.

"Good night Teddy," she wrapped her arms around him, strong and steady. "Happy birthday."

"Thanks," he smiled. "Love you."

Kaya blinked—he'd never said that to her before. She glanced over at Elsbeth, who had a hand on her heart, looking like she was trying not to cry. "Love you too, bud," she said as he pulled away.

Teddy scampered off to his room, seemingly unaware of the emotions he'd just stirred in the two women.

"Oh my goodness," Elsbeth whispered, as if the moment might disappear if she spoke too loudly.

"Yeah..." Kaya breathed. "Um... I guess I should head home too."

She moved to stand, but Elsbeth held out a hand.

"Wait—Kaya—look, about earlier, about us moving—"

"I shouldn't have brought it up," Kaya said quickly. "I'm sorry, it's none of my business."

"Kaya," Elsbeth shifted closer, her hand making contact with Kaya's arm. "Let me explain," she pleaded.

"Okay."

"I was looking for a place in Manhattan, but then work got so busy... And now Teddy's made friends at school, I don't really want to move him. I extended our lease here till the summer."

"Oh?"

"I was going to start looking for a place around here after Christmas," Elsbeth smiled. "I don't want to go far."

Kaya blushed, and dropped her gaze to where Elsbeth's hand was still resting on her arm.

"It'll be weird not seeing him around," she confessed softly. "Both of you."

Elsbeth rubbed her thumb feather-light along Kaya's arm. "Kaya, you're—" she paused.

Kaya looked up at her through her lashes. Her breath caught—when did they get this close?

"You're the most important person in our lives," Elsbeth finished.

"Els..."

Kaya leaned in closer, close enough to feel Elsbeth's breath against her lips. Are we about to—

Footsteps on the carpet broke through the quiet. Elsbeth slid away, putting a couple of inches between them. Kaya tried not to whine at the interruption.

"Mom, do you have some more toothpaste?" Teddy asked, walking in with the empty tube.

"Um," Elsbeth shook her head, trying to clear her thoughts. "Yeah, honey, let me grab you some."

She led Teddy back to the bathroom, a hand on his shoulder. She turned to look at Kaya, pleading with her eyes for her not to leave, not just yet.

Teddy got ready for bed, and Elsbeth tucked him in. She said a final happy birthday as he snuggled into bed, opening the first of a new series of books Kaya had bought for his birthday.

When she finally made it back to the living room, Kaya was gone.

Elsbeth sighed. They had been so close, hadn't they? She loved Teddy more than anything, but sometimes it felt like being a mom stood in the way of everything else she wanted. And Kaya—no matter how well Elsbeth thought she knew her, she was still so difficult to read. Was it too much for her, being reminded that Elsbeth was a single parent? Kaya loved Teddy... but that didn't mean she loved Elsbeth too, not in the way she wanted her to...

As she climbed into bed, dark thoughts continued to swirl in Elsbeth's mind. She lay awake, trying to push them aside, reminding herself of the wonderful day they'd shared, the memories they'd made together... as a family. At least, that's what Elsbeth wanted.

Kaya was just tired. You'll talk about it in the morning, she told herself. But she didn't quite believe it. With a groan, she rolled over, hoping for sleep. But all she found was silence.

Chapter Text

Elsbeth: fancy some froyo? ✨🍧

Kaya smiled at the picture Elsbeth had attached, a selfie in front of the frozen yoghurt place a couple of blocks over.

Ever since last Saturday, the almost-kiss on Teddy's birthday, Kaya hadn't exactly been avoiding Elsbeth, but she hadn't been going out of her way to see her either. She still hadn't figured out why she'd left. She knew Elsbeth had wanted her to stay, wait, so they could... talk about it? But then she'd done exactly what Elsbeth had done to her—left. And Kaya hadn't even said goodbye. She wasn't sure if she should apologise, ask to try again, or just act like nothing had ever happened.

She'd been on evening shifts, so begging off dinners had been easy, but now that a whole week had passed, Kaya felt ready to face it—whatever 'it' was. And she missed Teddy like crazy. Even if things were a little awkward at first, it would be worth it to see him again.

Kaya: sure, come over

Elsbeth: good!

Kaya didn't really get a chance to mull over her thoughts any further, because a couple of seconds later, Elsbeth was knocking at the door. She opened it and raised an eyebrow.

"I didn't know what to say," Elsbeth shrugged, a lopsided grin on her face.

"You sent me three words," Kaya levelled playfully.

"And two emojis!" Elsbeth protested, holding out the tubs of frozen yoghurt and toppings.

Kaya laughed, taking the desserts. Okay, I guess we're pretending like nothing happened...

While Elsbeth hung her coat, Kaya fetched some bowls and spoons from the kitchen. They met on the couch.

"I got peach and strawberry," Elsbeth pointed her spoon at the light orange and pink swirl of yoghurt that Kaya was scooping out. "Chocolate chips, sprinkles and caramel sauce," she pointed at the toppings.

Taking her her bowl, Elsbeth added a generous helping of everything. Kaya just poured on some caramel sauce.

"Sprinkles?" Elsbeth asked, rattling the container of colourful dots.

God, she's adorable, Kaya thought. She relented, and allowed Elsbeth to pour some onto her yoghurt.

"So where's Teddy tonight?" Kaya asked between bites.

"Oh," Elsbeth's smile faltered. "He's at his friend's place, for a sleepover."

"That's good, isn't it?"

"Yeah, I just worry about him," Elsbeth said, sounding defeated. "I'm trying not to think about it."

"Elsbeth," Kaya said softly, shuffling a little closer. She set her bowl down on the coffee table. "We can talk about it, if you want to."

Elsbeth took another slow spoonful of froyo as she thought about what to say. She'd come here to try and distract herself from her worries, but she should have known Kaya would sense her agitation. Kaya was looking at her with all the love and understanding in the world, and Elsbeth wanted to tell her everything, then curl up in her arms and never let go.

Of course she'd thought about the almost-kiss, she hadn't been able to stop. The whole thing played on loop in her mind whenever she stopped moving for more than a couple of minutes. She still didn't know why Kaya had left. The next morning, Kaya hadn't been home, and then a week of late shifts had kept them apart. Teddy was obviously missing Kaya terribly too, so when he'd asked to sleep over at a school friend's this weekend, she'd said yes quickly, and started worrying about it later.

"He's never had many friends before," Elsbeth finally said, voice small. "Some of the kids in Chicago, they were horrible. Their parents too."

"Whose place is he at?" Kaya asked.

"At Roy's."

"He's been there a couple of times, hasn't he? You've met his parents?"

"Yes, and they're so lovely. But I can't help it, worrying about him. What if they realise—" Elsbeth cut herself off. Had she said too much?

Kaya didn't say anything at first, giving Elsbeth the space to breathe. She reached for Elsbeth's hand, and rubbed her thumb along the back of it.

"Elsbeth..." Kaya started gently after a couple of minutes. "Teddy... wasn't always Teddy..." she paused. "Am I right?"

She felt Elsbeth stiffen under her touch.

"How long have you known?"

"I've been wondering for a while... Elsbeth, this doesn't change anything for me," Kaya said, realising that her friend needed reassurance, needed to know that everything was still okay.

Elsbeth felt herself crumble as Kaya continued to stroke her hand. All those walls she'd put up to protect Teddy from the world? She didn't need them around Kaya, not anymore. Maybe she never had.

Kaya reached out to wipe a away a tear Elsbeth didn't realise was falling. She took the bowl from Elsbeth's hands, set it down, and wrapped her in a hug.

Elsbeth didn't know how long they embraced for, but by the time she pulled back, the yoghurt was melted on the table. There were tears streaking Kaya's cheeks too.

"You're not totally right..."

"Hm?"

"He's always been my Teddy," Elsbeth said softly. She took a deep breath, and let out a short laugh. "When I was pregnant with him, they told me he was a boy. Michael was thrilled, I just wanted him to be healthy. We were going to call him Teddy. Then he was born, and I heard 'its a girl'," she made air quotes. "We chose another name, but Teddy just stuck. He hated all the pink and the rainbows and the fluffy hats I bought for him, so I let the nanny buy him whatever he liked. A couple of weeks into kindergarten he started telling us he was a boy. Michael... didn't take it well."

"That's when you got divorced?"

"Yes, and things settled down a little after that. Michael never really accepted it, but he was indifferent, I guess. I convinced myself that was good enough. I think sometimes I just needed a break, which is ridiculous, because I had a full time nanny...

"When he got a bit older, I told Michael I was taking him to see the doctor to get everything checked, figure out whether we needed to start him on anything. He wouldn't hear it. Teddy was already worrying about his body changing, and that's when he started refusing to go to his dad's. As long as we had joint legal custody he would block us from getting any medical treatment. It was a little confusing when he didn't really fight to keep custody, or even when I requested permission to move him here."

Kaya squeezed Elsbeth's hands as she finished talking, taking everything in. Elsbeth looked exhausted, but their was a lightness in her face that hadn't been there before.

"Thank you for telling me," Kaya said.

"I've wanted to..." Elsbeth sniffed. "But Teddy... he wasn't ready to tell you yet."

"I won't say anything till he's ready," Kaya promised.

"Thank you, Kaya."

"And Elsbeth?" Kaya waited for Elsbeth to meet her eyes. "He's strong. You both are. He'll be okay tonight."

"Yeah," Elsbeth blushed. "I know."

"Can you text Roy's mom? See how they're doing?"

"I... hadn't thought of that."

Elsbeth pulled out her phone and tapped out a quick message: everything going okay?

While they waited for a reply, Kaya gathered up what remained of their desserts, and took them to the kitchen.

Elsbeth received a photo of the two boys playing video games on the couch after a few minutes. She let out a sigh of relief as she read the message: boys being boys. She showed Kaya as she came back into the room.

"See, everything's okay," Kaya smiled.

"Did you change?" Elsbeth asked, noticing Kaya had switched her sweatpants for jeans, and had pulled on another sweater.

"Yeah, I thought we could go on a little adventure of our own."

Kaya offered a hand, and Elsbeth pulled herself up. They were just a few inches apart.

"Where, um," Elsbeth swallowed. "Where are we going?"

Kaya answered her with another question: "Do you trust me?"

"More than anyone."

~~~~

They took the train to midtown, then, with Elsbeth's mittened hand in the crook of Kaya's elbow, Kaya led them through the streets.

Although Elsbeth worked in Manhattan, the city was still a maze to her, especially at night. Her eyes sparkled as they passed New Yorkers tumbling out of restaurants and laughing on stoops. She tilted her head up to look at the buildings towering around them, wondering where they were headed. Gradually, Elsbeth noticed they were converging on one in particular.

"The Empire State Building, Kaya?" she asked gleefully. "You remembered!"

Kaya shrugged bashfully. "I've been wanting to bring you here for a while..."

"But we've never had any time alone," Elsbeth finished for her.

"Yeah."

Elsbeth leaned a little closer to Kaya as they entered the lobby. "I guess I really do need to find a babysitter," she said playfully.

Kaya laughed, her heart fluttering at the thought of more nights together. 

Thankfully, the wait for tickets and the elevator weren't long, and they reached the observation deck in no time. Elsbeth held Kaya close as they approached the rail. So high up, they could hardly even hear the sounds of traffic anymore. All they could hear was the wind and the soft hum of the crowd around them.

"It's stunning," Elsbeth breathed, taking in the city lights twinkling below.

Kaya hummed her agreement, but she wasn't looking at the view.

"Do you know where we live from up here?"

Kaya pulled her eyes from Elsbeth's profile and scanned the horizon. "Hmm, do you see that area with no lights?" she pointed.

Elsbeth nodded.

"That's the Sound, I think. So we live right over..." Kaya guided Elsbeth to turn to her right, "there." 

"Wow... You know, I could come up here every day, and never tire of this view," Elsbeth said softly. "I do miss seeing the stars though."

"Could you see many in Chicago?" Kaya asked.

"Not in Chicago, no. No, in Peoria, where I grew up." Elsbeth paused, wrapping a mitten around the safety rail. "In summer, I'd spend weeks at my grandmother's place, a little ways out of town. We'd get all dressed up like we had somewhere to be, and then just lie out in the yard and stare up at sky for hours..." Elsbeth said wistfully.

"Were you close with her?" Kaya asked.

"She was my favourite person in the whole world," Elsbeth's voice wobbled a little. "And she just adored Teddy. She didn't miss a beat when I told her he was trans. I wish she could see him now."

"She can, Els."

A strong gust of wind whipped by, flicking Elsbeth's hair across her face. Kaya noticed her shivering.

"Come on, let's get out of the wind."

Kaya led Elsbeth away from the edge, the crowd forming a barrier against the wind. They stood facing each other by the wall.

"I'm sorry about your grandmother, Elsbeth," Kaya said softly. "She sounds like she was an amazing woman."

"She was, but it's okay. I have so many wonderful memories with her, you know? And she lived an incredible life. Bold and colourful, right to the end."

"That's where you get it, hm?" Kaya poked Elsbeth's arm, over her bright pink coat.

Elsbeth blushed, and looked down at her feet. "Yeah..."

Kaya blushed too, then cleared her throat. "Do you, um, want to go look at the view from the other side? See if we can spot the Statue of Liberty?"

"No..."

"No?" Kaya deflated a little. Did Elsbeth want to go home already?

"No," Elsbeth said, a little more confidently this time. She lifted her head slightly, and caught Kaya's eyes through her lashes. She bit her lip, "I want to kiss you..."

Kaya's breath caught.

"May I?"

Kaya nodded, and Elsbeth took half a step forward. She slipped off one of her mittens, and cupped Kaya's cheek. Her fingers were freezing, but that's not why they sent a chill down Kaya's spine.

They leaned in slowly, inching forward till their noses were touching. Then Elsbeth closed the distance.

The kiss was soft, a tentative press of lips that made everything slow down around them. Elsbeth raked blunt nails along Kaya's neck, pulling her ever so slightly closer. Kaya took the hint, deepening the kiss with an arm around Elsbeth's waist.

When they pulled apart, Kaya held Elsbeth close, foreheads touching, breathing the same air.

"Now..." Elsbeth whispered once she'd caught her breath. "I want to go find Lady Liberty."

~~~~

They stayed on the observation deck a while longer, taking turns pointing out landmarks from around the city, squinting to make them out in the ambient city lights. When Elsbeth started yawning, Kaya suggested they head home. Elsbeth insisted they first browse the gift shop for a souvenir of their first visit to the Empire State Building. She didn't say what they were both thinking: their first kiss, too.

They huddled together on the train, and walked with linked arms back to their building. At Elsbeth's door, they lingered, not wanting their impromptu date to come to an end.

"I don't want to say goodnight," Kaya confessed, finally voicing what they were both feeling when neither made any move to part ways.

"So don't," Elsbeth whispered. "Stay with me?"

Kaya bit her lip—what is she asking?

"No funny business," Elsbeth said quickly, sensing Kaya's hesitation. "I just want to be close to you."

"Okay," Kaya took Elsbeth's hand with a smile, and let her lead them inside.

Chapter Text

"Are you doing anything on Friday?"

Kaya turned from where she was cleaning dishes and leaned against the cabinet.

"I'm not working, but I think you knew that," she teased.

Elsbeth ducked her head, leaning against the bench opposite Kaya.

"I did," she confessed, biting her lower lip. "I don't have any meetings booked, so I took a personal day. I thought we could... do something..." she trailed off.

It had been just over a week since their visit to the Empire State Building, since they'd kissed and spent the night wrapped in each other's arms. True to her word, Elsbeth hadn't tried any 'funny business' in bed that night, but she felt herself blushing as she remembered Kaya's hands wandering under her shirt as they'd kissed in bed the next morning. Between Kaya's schedule, and her own duties as mom and dog-mom, she figured that taking a day off work was their best chance at scoring a little kid-free time together.

Kaya dried her hands and pushed off the bench, coming to stand in front of Elsbeth.

"What if I'm busy?" she asked, putting her hands on the bench, trapping Elsbeth between her arms.

Elsbeth's blush deepened. "Well—only if you're free, I mean, I'll just—" she stuttered.

"Relax, Els," Kaya laughed, "I'm just teasing. What would you like to do together?"

"Ohh," Elsbeth recovered quickly, straightened her back and took half a step closer to Kaya. "I would really like to, um," she licked her lips, "go see the Rockefeller tree."

Kaya smiled, fighting the urge to roll her eyes at Elsbeth's unending interest in the most touristy attractions their city had to offer. It was endearing really, and she was starting to see the city in a whole new light. Why shouldn't she enjoy something, just because it was popular with visitors? Besides, walking tours hadn't quite made their way out to Queens yet.

She let go of the bench and clasped her hands behind Elsbeth's back. "That sounds lovely."

As Elsbeth beamed up at her, Kaya couldn't help but lean down and kiss her. She went to pull away, but Elsbeth deepened the kiss, cupping Kaya's cheek in her palm. When Kaya felt Elsbeth's tongue running along her lower lip, she pulled back.

"Sorry," she whispered breathlessly. "I know you said you wanted to be careful with Teddy around."

"I'm finding it," Elsbeth paused and ran her thumb along Kaya's cheekbone, "really hard to care about that right now..."

Kaya closed her eyes, and breathed in as she felt lithe fingers tracing the column of her neck then along her collarbone. "Elsbeth..." she breathed. "We shouldn't..."

"I know." Elsbeth reluctantly took a step back, and Kaya's hands fell to her sides.

"Speaking of Christmas trees, when are you getting one?" Kaya asked, trying to redirect her focus.

"Oh, well, all of our decorations are still in storage," Elsbeth frowned. "There doesn't seem much point in getting one when we have hardly anything to put on it... Especially since we won't be here."

"Teddy doesn't want to put one up?"

"He did ask about it, but I asked my parents to wait until we arrived to decorate theirs. I thought that might be more fun."

"Hm, I guess so. I always loved putting the tree up when I was his age," Kaya said thoughtfully. "I haven't had my own since I moved in here."

Elsbeth reached for Kaya's hands. "Next year, we'll get a huge tree, hm? So tall it has to bend to fit under the ceiling—and decorate it all together. Make up for spending this Christmas apart."

"I'd like that," Kaya squeezed Elsbeth's hands, then let go. "Friday, then?"

Elsbeth nodded rapidly. "Mhmm! I'll come get you after school drop off."

"Can't wait."

~~~~

Elsbeth's fingers tightened around Gonzo's lead as she stepped into the apartment with a gasp. Her other hand wrapped protectively around Teddy's shoulders.

"Where did that come from?" she found herself asking aloud.

"Did someone break in?" Teddy asked.

"Oh my goodness. Oh!" Kaya's voice came from behind them in the hallway. "No—it was me," she added, appearing beside them in the doorway.

"I don't—I don't understand..."

"It was me, okay. Listen, I know you said everything was still in storage, but I didn't want to wait a whole year to decorate a tree together," Kaya explained.

"So this is for us?" Teddy asked, already bouncing with excitement.

"Yeah, buddy," Kaya nodded.

"Cool!" he pulled himself out of his mother's grasp and skidded to his knees on the carpet in front of the tree, dropping his school bag on the floor.

"So this is where you ran off to, hm?" Elsbeth asked, stepping a little closer to Kaya.

That morning, Elsbeth and Kaya had headed into Manhattan for their date. They'd admired the beautiful Rockefeller tree, drunk more hot chocolate than any person ever should in a single day (Kaya's words), and went ice skating on the plaza rink (had Elsbeth suggested it hoping it would yield Kaya's strong arm around her waist for an hour? She would never tell...). When Elsbeth asked Kaya if she'd like to come with her to pick Teddy up from school, and Gonzo from puppy daycare, she'd tried to hide her disappointment when Kaya told her she had an errand to run, and would meet them back later.

"Yeah," Kaya said sheepishly.

"What is all this?"

"Well, since my parents are spending winter in Europe this year, I figured they wouldn't mind if we made use of their decorations."

"Aw, Kaya, how sweet," Elsbeth leaned into Kaya, stopping just shy of kissing her, remembering her son was just a few feet away.

"I got us something else too," Kaya held up a striped shopping bag.

Elsbeth gleefully undid the ribbon of the bag and reached in.

"Christmas pyjamas?!" she shrilled. "Teddy, come look."

Sweeping his floppy hair out of his face, Teddy came over to the dining table. Elsbeth handed him a set of pyjamas.

"Go put these on, honey, then we can decorate the tree."

"Really, Mom?" he made a face.

"Go on, look, Kaya's got herself matching ones," she pointed at the set Kaya was holding, red and green stipes with little reindeer on them, just like Teddy's.

"Fine," he said, rolling his eyes and stalking off to his room.

"Too much?" Kaya asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Nah," Elsbeth waved her hand. "He'll forget about it once I order pizza."

She pulled a fourth, tiny outfit out of the bag. "Oh my goodness, Gonzo!"

The pup scampered over at the sound of her name, and Elsbeth scooped her up. Kaya helped Elsbeth get a wriggling Gonzo into her pink onesie. Elsbeth grabbed the shopping bag and Kaya's hand, and led her to the bedroom.

Kaya hesitated in the doorway. "I'll change in the bathroom," she said after a second.

"Of course, right, that's fine," Elsbeth replied awkwardly.

The bathroom door swung shut, and Elsbeth retreated to change. Oh, how sweet were these pyjamas? Light pink, covered with red hearts. It made hers melt a little, thinking about what Kaya had done for her and Teddy this afternoon.

As predicted, Teddy forgot all about the pyjamas once pizzas were ordered, delivered, eaten, and they started decorating the tree.

As they worked their way through the boxes, Kaya told the Tascionis about her family's ornaments. How she'd made popsicle stick Santa in elementary school, how one year her family had taken a bauble decorating class, and that's why their names were written in such terrible cursive glitter glue. How when she was little they would visit her grandparents upstate, and make decorations out of clay, and then paint them once they were fired.

Elsbeth even pulled out a handful of items she'd collected on their adventures around the city. A little Roosevelt Island tramcar, a tiny Statue of Liberty, a glittery Empire State Building (she looked right at Kaya as she'd hung that one, and watched a blush bloom across her cheeks). 

"You want to put the star up, T?" Kaya asked.

He bounced to his feet. "Yes!!"

Kaya lifted him up, and Elsbeth handed him the crystal-covered star, which she had somehow bought today at the Plaza when Kaya wasn't looking.

They all took a couple of steps back to admire their work. It was certainly no Rockefeller tree, and it was missing most of Teddy and Elsbeth's decorations, but it really was beautiful.

Later, when Teddy had gone to bed, Kaya and Elsbeth huddled on the couch together (Kaya having politely declined the offer of yet another hot chocolate).

"That you for doing this for us," Elsbeth said softly.

"I couldn't let you miss out on the sparkliest of the holidays, could I?" Kaya teased. "It's just so," she waved at the tree, then fixed her eyes on Elsbeth, "you."

"Hmm," Elsbeth hummed. She leaned towards Kaya, and pressed their lips together.

This time, Kaya didn't pull back when she felt Elsbeth's tongue trace her lower lip. She tugged on the front of Elsbeth's pyjamas, and Elsbeth climbed on top, straddling her on the couch without breaking the kiss. Of course, they had kissed at the Plaza that afternoon, but nothing so indulgent, so deep as they did now, in the privacy of Elsbeth's apartment. With one hand, Kaya sifted through shiny red hair, with the other, she pulled Elsbeth towards her.

Elsbeth pulled back slightly, peppering kisses along Kaya's jaw, her fingers fiddling with the zipper at Kayas chest.

Kaya moaned as Elsbeth found a sensitive spot on her neck. "Els..."

"I'm sorry," Elsbeth squeaked, her forehead pressed into Kaya's neck. "You're just... so wonderfully irresistible." She lifted her head. "Sometimes I almost can't believe this is really happening. When did I get this lucky?"

Kaya blushed at the profusion of compliments coming from the woman sitting astride her lap. "I've wondered the same thing. Elsbeth, I know we haven't really... talked—about what this is. But I want you to know I—I'm—" falling in love with you. She paused. "This isn't casual for me," she finally said.

"Kaya," Elsbeth cupped her face with both hands. "This isn't casual for me either."

"If you want to tell Teddy that we're, well that we're dating," Kaya said slowly. "I wouldn't mind..."

"Oh, Kaya," Elsbeth breathed. "Are you sure?" her hands dropped to Kaya's shoulders, playing with the loose hair near her neck.

Kaya nodded. "It's up to you, of course. But I don't want to hide this," she held Elsbeth's hands between them. "I've never felt this way about anyone before, and I mean," she glanced at the tree they'd just put up, "it already feels like we're a family."

"I don't know what to say," Elsbeth sniffled, wiping her eyes with her sleeve as her emotions began getting the better of her. "Gosh, I am going to miss you so much when we go away."

"It's only a couple of days," Kaya said gently. "I can call you every night. And I'll have Gonzo to keep me company."

Elsbeth leaned in again, pressing a soft, lingering kiss to Kaya's lips.

"I'll think about telling Teddy," she said when she walked Kaya to the door. "It sure would be nice to be able to have you stay over without worrying about being interrogated in the morning..."

"Yeah, that would be nice," Kaya agreed with a sly smile.

Elsbeth matched her expression. "Good night, Kaya."

"Sweet dreams, Els."

Elsbeth watched the door shut behind Kaya before she headed back inside. She moved their plates and glasses to the kitchen sink, then worked through her evening routine, the whole time wishing to spend another night in Kaya's arms. Sure they'd only been on two dates, and kissed a handful of times, but she could feel it already. This was real. She just had to figure out how to tell her son.

Chapter Text

"I'm seeing someone," Elsbeth blurted out.

She'd been scraping her food around with her fork, listening to her mother, Greta, talk about the new Icelandic club she'd joined in town for the last twenty or so minutes, unable to eat as her stomach churned with the weight of what she wanted to share. The last time she'd said those three words to her parents, she'd already been engaged to Michael—and look at how that turned out.

Elsbeth and Teddy had been in Peoria for two days already, and she'd spent all forty-eight hours working up the nerve to say something, mindful that even though her son didn't know yet, she wouldn't be seeing her parents again for some time. With her dad having taken Teddy sledding in the park today, Elsbeth had invited her mom out for brunch.

"That's wonderful news, Elly," Greta replied. "What's his name? What does he do?"

"Her name," Elsbeth paused, watching to see how her mother would react. When she saw no frown, no crease between the eyebrows, she continued, "Is Kaya. She's a police officer."

"An officer, hm? That must make you feel safe in the big city."

"I suppose so. Our neighbourhood is quite safe, really..." Elsbeth put her fork down. "Mom, you're not upset that I'm... dating a woman?"

"Oh, honey," Greta sighed. "No, of course not. I know—I know we weren't the best when you told us about Teddy, but we've seen how well he's been doing since then, even just since you moved to New York. We just want you to be happy."

"Oh," Elsbeth let go of a breath she didn't realise she'd been holding. She'd been expecting more of a fight. "Thanks, Mom."

"Hold on," Greta tapped a finger against her lip. "Is this the same 'Kaya' that Teddy was telling us about? I thought she was a friend from school."

"Umm, yes... one and the same," Elsbeth answered reluctantly. Maybe she wasn't quite in the clear yet.

"It sounded like they were pretty close," Greta's eyes narrowed slightly, her head tilted to one side. "How long have you two been dating, exactly?"

Elsbeth fiddled with the mittens in her lap. "Well, we've technically only been on two dates..."

"And she's already met my grandson?"

"We've known her since the week we moved in—she lives in our building," Elsbeth said quickly. "And she's so good with him. I just—" she wrinkled her nose, "—haven't figured out how to tell him yet."

Greta's expression softened. She reached across the table, and Elsbeth took her hand.

"Are you in love with her?"

"Yeah," Elsbeth nodded. "I think I am."

"Then I don't think you have anything to worry about, honey."

~~~~

When Kaya got home from her sister's, she grabbed a beer, and flopped down on the couch. With her parents visiting her younger sister in Europe, it had been a pretty small celebration this year; nonetheless she was exhausted from chasing her two little nieces around all afternoon. Gonzo, equally tired from having free reign all day in the backyard, leapt onto the couch and curled up by Kaya's hip.

At least she wouldn't be the one fielding her nieces' requests for a puppy for the next month or two.

She was about to switch the TV on, watch something mindless before bed, when her phone buzzed. Her lips twitched as she saw who was calling. The picture of Elsbeth with a frothy hot chocolate moustache was one of her favourites.

"Hellooo," she answered sleepily.

"Kaya?"

"Teddy, hi!"

"Merry Christmas!"

"Merry Christmas, Teddy! How has your trip been?"

Kaya listened as Teddy told her about everything they'd done so far in Peoria—decorating his grandparents' tree, sledding in the park with his pop, setting up his new Switch and playing Mario Kart as a family. He made Kaya promise to play when he got home.

"Mom says I have to go to bed now," Teddy said sadly. "I miss you Kaya."

Kaya's heart clenched at Teddy's words. It had only been a couple of days, and they'd gone longer than that without seeing each other, but they were always just down the hall. She hadn't expected to feel the distance quite so much. She reached down and stroked Gonzo's fur, reminding herself they'd be back soon.

"I miss you too, buddy. I'll see you in a few days. I love you."

"Love you too."

As Teddy handed the phone off to his mother, Kaya heard Elsbeth saying she'd come say good night in a few minutes. She sipped her beer as she waited to hear the door close.

"Hey," Elsbeth's soft voice came down the line.

"Hi," Kaya breathed.

"Happy Christmas."

"You too, Els."

"How's Gonzo?"

"She's great," Kaya reached down again to stroke the pup. "I think my nieces wanted her to stay."

"Well, who wouldn't? She's such a good girl," Elsbeth cooed. "Give her a cuddle from me."

"Of course."

"I miss you. I know we've spoken every day but... it's just not the same."

"I know, I miss you too Elsbeth."

"My mom wants you to visit with us next time..."

"You told her about me?" Kaya asked.

She knew Elsbeth had been nervous about telling her parents, but when they'd left, she'd been erring on the side of saving it for the next visit.

"Teddy told them about you," Elsbeth laughed. "My mom thought you were a friend from school. But... yeah, I told her about you," her voice dropped almost to a whisper. "Yesterday. I'm sorry I didn't say anything last night."

"You don't have to be sorry, Els," Kaya assured her. "I'm guessing it went okay, if she wants to meet me...?"

"It did. And I'd love for you to come next time."

"I'd like that," Kaya smiled.

The line went silent for a few moments.

"I should go say good night to Teddy."

"Of course. I should get ready for bed too. Good night, Els."

"Sweet dreams, Kaya. I—I'll call you tomorrow."

"I'll be waiting."

Kaya hung up the phone, and let her arm drop to the floor beside the couch. Elsbeth hadn't been about to say... had she? It felt a little odd that she could tell Teddy she loved him, but not his mom. She loved Elsbeth, for sure. The Tascionis had become like family to her over the past couple of months. But it hadn't taken her long to realise she felt something more for Elsbeth, that she'd been falling in love with her for a while.

But that was a conversation to be had when they were back in New York. It felt good to know Elsbeth had told someone about them though.

It's real for her too.

With a drowsy Gonzo tucked under one arm, Kaya downed the rest of her drink and made her way to her bedroom. Just a couple more sleeps until they'd be back together. It was a good thing she had work to keep her busy until then.

~~~~

Elsbeth knocked softly on her old bedroom door. When Teddy gave the okay, she entered. The posters and photos she'd hung in her teens were long gone, taken down when her parents had repainted the room, but most of her old furniture was there, displaying the medals and trophies she'd brought home from debate tournaments and science fairs. Teddy was tucked into her old twin bed, looking nothing short of adorable in the festive pyjamas Kaya had given him.

"I think we'll need to get your hair cut before you go back to school," she said, pushing aside his curly fringe and kissing the crown of his head.

"I kinda like it long."

Elsbeth squeezed his shoulders. Was this the same kid who tried to cut his hair off with play-doh scissors after his kindergarten teacher told him it was pretty? He was changing so much, so quickly, sometimes she just wanted to tell him to stop growing already.

"Okay, we'll let it grow a little more then."

Teddy leaned into his mom's side.

"There's something I want to talk to you about, sweetheart."

"Hmm?"

Elsbeth took a calming breath. "I'm dating someone," she paused.

Teddy turned to her, but didn't say anything.

"It's Kaya."

Teddy frowned, confused. "You're dating Kaya?"

"Yes sweetie."

"Oh, weird."

"Weird?" Elsbeth asked. "What's weird about that?"

Teddy shrugged. "Have you kissed her?"

Elsbeth laughed. "Yes, baby, I've kissed her."

"Ew," Teddy wrinkled his nose. "Is she going to move in with us?"

"We haven't been dating for that long, Teddy. Maybe one day," she kissed his head again. "She might stay the night at our place sometimes, though."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah, as long as she can play Mario Kart with me."

"She promised, didn't she?"

"Mm." Elsbeth felt Teddy nod.

"I'll leave you to get some sleep," Elsbeth squeezed his shoulders once more before standing. "Merry Christmas, honey."

"Night, Mom."

She let the door shut softly behind her.

He was fine with it, wasn't he?