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Laurance wakes just before dawn to an excruciating headache, more painful than any he’s experienced before.
As he tries to sit up, the pain floods through the rest of his body. His eyes sting, and his blood feels molten within his veins. It doesn’t take long for him to realise that the pain he’s feeling is undoubtedly a ‘Shadow Knight thing’—as he has affectionately been calling his symptoms to Garroth.
The pain is similar to, but just shy of, the pain he’d felt during his initial transformation. Blood boiling, bones breaking, teeth and nails sharpening…
Laurance reaches for the hand mirror he keeps on his bedside—painted emerald and gold, Cadenza had given it to him for his birthday when they were young. Initially, he’d kept it on his person, but the sight of it had caused the jokes the people of Meteli liked to make about his ‘narcissism’ to turn from light-hearted to biting, and so he’d put it away.
He expects his face to be flushed. His veins to be pronounced, dark with hot, tar-like blood. He does not expect his eyes to be a blood red, crimson as the armour his broken body had been forced into.
The mirror slips from his hand and lands on the floor with a loud clatter. Immediately, Laurance curses, hoping the sound doesn’t bring any of his fellow guards knocking on his quarters. He waits for the sound of footsteps approaching his door… but none come. And so, Laurance picks up the mirror, returning his attention back to his reflection. He doesn’t know why this is happening, why his transformation from man to monster has decided to accelerate despite his recent pacifism, but he doesn’t want to sit around and wait for it to finish.
There’s only one person he can think of to go to for help. One person who won’t be afraid of his true identity, who won’t spill that his condition has gotten worse. And, as he makes his way over to her house, he thinks it’s a little funny: he doesn’t even know Lucinda that well, and yet here he is, about to bare his soul to her—his guard’s pride be damned.
Arriving at her towering manor, Laurance finds that Lucinda has put up a hastily scrawled sign overnight: ‘Resting power. Please try not to disturb unless it’s an emergency! A true emergency.’
… He hates to disturb her so soon after the miracle she’d pulled with Alexis… but he hopes that she has at least one more miracle in her.
Arriving at her entryway, Laurance calls up to her, hoping his voice alone is enough to wake her. When he is met with silence, Laurance bites his lip and begins the ascent to her potion room, feeling guilty. Unsurprisingly, he finds it empty, and Laurance grimaces as he yells out for her once more, this time up to her bedroom. His guilt grows knowing he’s disturbing her sleep… but he needs to know if he’s become a danger to the town. And if she can help him if he has.
Bigglesworth is the first to make his way down from Lucinda’s bedroom, wings flapping wearily, and Lucinda follows shortly behind him, climbing down the ladder with grumpy footsteps. “This better be good,” she says.
Looking at her through his fingers… Laurance sees that she’s a mess—not that he can judge her, he’s sure he isn’t looking a million diamonds right now, either. She’d only managed to put half her hair up in curlers before evidently giving up, and from the way her makeup is smudged across her face, Laurance guesses that she hadn’t had the energy to clean the previous day’s look from her face.
“It’s an emergency. I promise.”
“Mhm,” Lucinda crosses her arms in front of her chest. However, when Laurance removes the hand from his eyes, the annoyance on her face falters. “… Okay, yeah. You’re probably right.” Lucinda gestures for him to take a seat and sits down beside him, Bigglesworth perching on the back of her chair. “But before I do anything, you should know that I hardly know anything about Shadow Knights. Their secrets are well kept, and any Witch worth her salt knows not to interfere with their energy.”
“I know… I didn’t come to you thinking you were an expert. I just… thought you might at least be able to tell if I’m becoming a threat.”
Lucinda thinks for a moment. “I’ll see what I can do. I can tell you this much though: your energy feels way more intense than usual. That much was obvious to me the moment you entered my home.”
She begins by pressing the back of her hand to his head, wincing a little at the heat. “Do all Shadow Knights run this warm?”
“Pretty much. Our bodies are imbued with hellfire, after all. Though, my temperature rises more when my powers are acting up.”
Lucinda nods her head before continuing the physical examination. Using an ominous-looking eye, she observes the black, coagulating blood in his veins and the inflamed tissue of his eyes. Honestly, her examination makes him feel more like a test subject than a patient, but he supposes it’s only fair that he imparts some knowledge on her in exchange for her otherwise free service.
“… Well, from what I can see, I don’t think your eyes have actually turned red,” Lucinda eventually says, putting the ominous eye down. “It’s more so that an overflow of power in your body has caused them to appear red, since the essence left behind by Shadow Knight magicks is red, too. Think of it like a trick of the light.”
“So… they’ll go back to normal?”
“They should! Unless there’s something to do with Shadow Knights and having red eyes that I don’t know about.”
“All I know is that… a Shadow Knight’s eyes are only supposed to turn red when they kill the person closest to them. And when they turn, they actually turn. Though, Shadow Knights can choose to disguise the colour with a glamor.”
“I see…” Lucinda nods. “Well, I guess my observation could be wrong—though I don’t think it is. From what I can sense, your power seems to be concentrating in your eyes and arteries, which is why your eyes and veins are appearing different than normal.” After a pause, she asks: “… I don’t suppose you’ve killed anyone lately, have you?”
“Lucinda!”
The girl cackles. “Sorry, sorry… I know you’re not that type of guy. Anyway, while we can assume the change is impermanent and due to your powers acting up, I can’t really tell why. Has anything happened lately? And is it linked to something that has made your powers act up before?”
The possible causative incident pops into his head almost immediately. In fact, Laurance is surprised that it had popped out of his brain at some point, considering it was all he could think about while trying to fall asleep last night.
“… It could have something to do with what happened when Aphmau and I were making our way back from Meteli.”
“And what happened?”
“Well… I—ugh. It’s so embarrassing. We witnessed some Shadow Knight activity in Meteli and… seeing Aphmau and Cadenza so close to one of their ritual sights… I kind of lost my cool. On our walk back I practically bared my soul to her, even though it wasn’t a good time. And I… I touched her.”
“Touched her?!”
“Yeah, I gave her a hug.”
“Oh…. well, that doesn’t sound so bad. It was only a hug, after all.”
Laurance clutches his head in his hands. “You don’t understand. I hugged her without permission. And while some people wouldn’t care… Aphmau did. She’s very particular about physical affection.”
“I see…”
“I’m just so ashamed,” he groans, “I should’ve controlled myself better. I know I can control myself better.”
“Well, then it’s pretty clear that your powers are acting up because you're beating yourself up over what happened. From what you said back in Pikoro, your Knighthood is closely linked with your relationship to and feelings for Aphmau. So, when you feel either start to slip… control of your powers slips away from you, too.”
“Then, how can I get it to stop from slipping?”
“Which? Your relationship, your feelings, or your powers? Though, I think the answer is the same for them all: you just need some time. Time to calm down, time to reflect… and time to realise that, no matter what happened, I’m sure Aphmau has already forgiven you.”
“… You’re right.”
“I always am. Apparently even about things I know next to nothing about,” Lucinda says with a grin, causing Laurance to roll his eyes. “Since there’s nothing I can do to change them back, is there anything you can wear to cover your eyes? If not, I’m sure I can procure some kind of accessory.”
“Don’t worry, our new guard uniforms came with helms, though Garroth’s the only one that wears his. I hate how claustrophobic they feel.”
“And why would you ever want to cover up your handsome face?” Lucinda adds.
“Exactly!”
As Laurance makes to leave, he thanks Lucinda profusely. Immediately, she waves him off: “don’t worry about it. Even though you did interrupt my rest—” Laurance winces “—I said people could if it was an emergency. And you certainly had one.”
He makes it a few more steps towards the ladder before she interrupts him again. “Oh! Laurance, one more thing…”
“Hm…?”
Before he can stop her, she rushes over to him and throws her arms around his shoulders. “I know I’m probably not as good at hugging as Aphmau, but maybe this’ll help you calm down a little.”
It… takes a moment for Laurance to return her hug. Lucinda’s right: it… doesn’t feel as good as hugging Aphmau. But that doesn’t mean it feels bad, either. Just… different. Lucinda’s taller than Aphmau, for one thing, and she smells strongly of perfume and hair oil. And… if he squints his eyes… he can almost imagine he’s hugging Cadenza, strands of her fiery hair trailing down her back.
Lucinda lets him choose when to end the hug, and he does so after a while—apparently, he’s starved for affection from anyone, not just Aphmau. “Thank you… again…”
“No prob. Just… don’t come back with any more emergencies today, capeesh?”
Laurance laughs. “Yeah… capeesh.”