Chapter Text

Chapter 11

☆Not a monster☆

N stared right into the soul of the drone in the mirror, trying to make sure he looked absolutely stunning before Uzi would get there, and not just because he liked to look his best around her, but also because it felt nice to look nice.

He noticed his feathery bangs didn’t seem to have much fluff to them like they usually did, so he grabbed a brush from the counter and pulled it through his hair a few times, puffing up his hair even more than it already was.

He then noticed some smudge marks on his screen, he licked his palm and rubbed the areas until it shun in the yellow hue of the bathroom light.

He straightened himself up, “Looking good.” he aimed two finger guns to the mirror, with a grin,

He then left the room, Uzi’s words still buzzing around in his mind like a mad hornet.

He then went to the living room, and started to clean it up, spit shining the tv, using the lower part of his jacket to dust off the Garfield phone on the coffee table by the sofa, and pushing the painting of the cat to where it was hung up, to where it would be straight.

Then just as if on cue, he heard a knock on his door.

He turned to it, face emotionless but tail wagging at the speed of light behind him.

He dashed over and swung the door open, doing a spin as he done so.

Sure enough in front of him was his girlfriend.

A wide smile crept onto his face.

“Well hello their my darling!” he cooed to her, clapping two hands together “You look great today, as always”

Uzi grinned at with amusement “Darling?” she parroted.

N dropped his hands to his side

“Sorry, is that too much?” he asked.

Uzi giggled, trying to hide her mouth behind a hand, “Nah it’s fine.” she shrugged “Just didn’t take you for the type to use pet names.”

Uzi walked in, her boots sinking into the old dirty carpet, she scanned the room.

“So this is the place?” she looked back to N.

N shut the door behind her, and pushed his back to it.

“What do you think?” he asked for her input, anxious awaiting her response to this

She went into the living room then into the kitchen, all the furniture looked so dull to her, and the room was tinted yellow by the dim old lights.

She looked at the right side of the kitchen wall, where she noticed a large crack in the paint.

She buzzed skeptic.

“Definantly something.” she replied with an intentional dryness in her tone.

N went to her side, “I get it, looks pretty run down, doesn’t it?” he asked looking down to his hands placed together, Uzi was quick to try and explain

“No! No, it's nice! just-”

Uzi looked to him waving her hand in front of her.

“It’s okay, you don’t have to lie.” N insisted, perfectly fine with her opinion, “I know, it’s not the best.”

“Besides, me and V are planning on getting it fixed up.” he explained “As matter of fact, I just got done decorating my room!”

“Wanna see.” he bent down to her level placing his hands behind his back.

"Sure."

She followed him down the hall and over to a door on the left hall, leading to his room.

N opened the door, "Ladies first."

“Oh wow!” Uzi’s eyes turned to rings, surprised at the contrast of his room and the rest of the house.

“Tada!” He went into the center of the room and raised his arms up.

Uzi hesitantly steped into the room, taking in her surroundings just as she did before.

N’s bedroom’s walls were spray painted a pale rose color, she knew it was specifically spray paint because their was around 15 cans of empty spray paint littered all around the room, then in the middle of the room was a big queen sized bed, with that same Crypto the superdog blanket placed on top of it, with a bunch of dog plushies piled on top of it.

Then a shelf on the left side of the room, with hardly anything on it except for a colored book with a present bow stuck on the front of it, and a pair of colored pencils, and then dog posters everywhere.

She then noticed the shelf had both been spray painted as well, in an acrylic gold color.

The room was brightly colored, even with the bad lightning, and honestly it was a little jarring to Uzi for the most part.

Despite that though she expected nothing more from her golden retriever of a boyfriend.

N walked in beside her, tweedling his thumbs together, “So you like my room?” he asked.

A hint of insecurity teetered in the kind tone of his voice.

Uzi placed a hand on her hip, “I’m gonna be honest with you,” she began “It’s really bright shiny, and is way more happy then most things I’ve seen around here.”

A frown crossed N’s face, and his head hung low.

“Just like you.” Uzi looked up to him with a smirk,

N looked back up to her, yellow blush burning his screen.

“Hm?” he titled his head.

He thought on it for a moment, and it finally hit him, "OH."

he placed a hands on his cheeks and smiled bashfully “Awww!” he gushed lovingly.

Uzi snickered, proud with herself and the response she had gotten out of him, that was until she was pulled off from her feet and into N’s arms.

“Hey!” she cried

“Oh Uzi! You're so sweet when you wanna be!” N rubbed the tips of their noses together, which while making Uzi nearly melt into nothing but putty, flustured her.

“Just because your twice my size doesn’t mean you can pick me up like this!!” Uzi exclaimed, pushing away from him. “Now put me down!!”

“Hehe! Okay! Okay! I’ll put you down.” her boyfriend chirped happily.

He raised her up and tossed her onto the bed.

With a shout of alarm, she hit the bed back first, bouncing a couple of times, the dog plushies all launching into the air and falling onto the air for a moment.

She sat back up and crossed her arms, lower lip puffed at N.

“Also, for the record I think I’d be three times your size.” N placed one hand behind his back and one in front, with a finger pointed into the air.

Uzi furrowed her brows.

“Excuse me!?”

She leaned closer to him so she could hear him better did she hear that right?

“Yeah! No offense, but you're really short!” N replied, completely oblivious from the offense she had taken from his comment.

Uzi’s jaw fell to the floor, and she recoiled back for a moment.

She then started to slowly lean over to him, bringing her now shaking hands around him, “You little-”

“Wrong,” N shook his head, “You’re the little one here, not me!”

Uzi grabbed him by the scruff of his collar and pulled him onto the bed with her.

N screamed, feeling his girlfriend wrap her self around him. and jokingly try to ring his neck, N responded to this by grabbing her by the scruff of her jacket and pulling her off.

They then began to play fight, their deafening laughter beginning to feel the room.

They both ended up rolling off the bed, N being first, and Uzi being last.

The lied down beside each other for a moment, before N placed himself over his girlfriend, pinning her to the ground.

“Gotcha!” he said, triumphant.

She giggled, and tried to push him off of her,

"Get off me! Let me go!!" she laughed weakly trying to kick his into his chest, trying to push him off her.

N simply leaned closer down to her, smirking for a moment, and his tail whipping in each direction, peircing the air like a needle through fabric.

He shook his head, "Nah uh uh!" he bubbled, still not budging.

That was until the grin on her face turned into a grimace.

“Ow...OW!” his girlfriend cried, trying to pull herself out from under him.

N sat up confused for a moment, but then he looked down and to his horror, he the tip of his tail an inch worth dug into her leg.

He gasped, and quickly pulled off from her, gently sliding the needle out from her calf.

The purple haired drone pulled herself up, her left leg bending as she began to rub the wound, mumbling something under her breath as she done so.

“Oh my gosh! I'm so sorry! I-I didn’t even notice!!” he frantically tried to explain, pulling at the hair near off his scalp “I was just-”

“Ah…it’s fine!” Uzi hissed through gritted teeth.

She continued to caress the wound. “I know you didn’t mean to.”

they both looked at the wound, the nanite acid was lining out the hole, continuing to each away at the metal, and oil that leaked out from the wound, N placed two hands over his mouth, nervously crossing his legs.

Uzi grabbed his shoulder, “Here, just fix it.” she ordered, her grip tighting from the pain.

She straightened her leg otu for him, and with a nod N done just as he was asked

He brought his hand up to his face and drag his tongue over the palm of it, afterwards placed his hand onto the wound.

Uzi shuddered as the warm liquid seeped into the wound.

The healing saliva burned for a moment, and the area where the gash was began to shrink, previous metal began to form back where it was.

She sighed with relief, and then looked up to N with a half smile.

“For the record, I’m only this short because dad stopped bringing me to the doctor to get my size fixed up 'cuz he was too busy with building doors.” she explained

“Seriously?” N found that hard to believe.

Actually...no he didn't.

“Uzi, that’s actually kinda sad.” he looked to her wiht a frown

Uzi shrugged "Yeah I know."

She then pulled herself up from the ground, N watched her closely, it bothered him how casually she just admited to her father being so negligent of her, and knowing it was wrong.

“Anyway... " the purple haired drone stretched "I’m feeling tuckered out.”

“Heading back home?” N pulled himself right next to her.

“Nah.” Uzi pulled herself out onto the bed, N's eyes went hollow watching this.

Uzi let out a peaceful noise, burying her face into the blanket, pulling herself onto her side, back faced to N, who still stared at her with wide eyes, wondering just what she was doing. Uzi turned to him.

“How about we just lie down together for a few minutes?” she asked “Just the two of us?”

N blinked in surprise at this, knowing how stand offish she usually was with physical contact such as this, however being the touch = love language kinda guy he was, he didn’t question it, and done just as was asked of him.

“Sure." N slid onto the bed next to her, “We can do that.”

Uzi turned to face N, looking at his with soft eyes and a smug smile, which caused his core to beat quick against his chastice.

“So how’s life been not living at our house anymore?” she asked the one question that had been on her mind ever since she had came to his home.

“Honestly,” N began turning to look up at the fan “I like having a new house, it’s nice to have my own room that I can decorate,”

He smiled for a moment thinking of that, but his expression quickly lowered

“But…I really miss living with you,” he confessed. “How we’d stay up at night talking about stuff that really didn’t matter, when I’d fall asleep at the foot of your bed, and how we’d watch anime on your laptop first thing when I woke up.”

He chordleted “Even when you and V fought about who got to use the bathroom first at morning time, I miss that from time to time.” he grinned.

A pained expression came onto Uzi’s face, and a tear began to form at the edge of her right eye. Great , now he was gonna get her going.

“Yeah…” she exhaled softly, “I hate to admit, but I miss you guys too.” she looked him dead in the eyes, “You especially, but V ON THE OTHER HAND-”

“Uzi…”

“Okay! I miss V alot too.”

“Thank you.” N said.

“That’s a secret between us though, you tell anyone and I will murder your absolute face off!” she threatened her boyfriend.

N snickered softly at this.

“Still though,” continued Uzi “I do miss you guys, and mom was really a downgrade compared to you two.”

She cleared it up “I mean I know that sounds mean, but my mom, she’s just so…so…”

She grunted in annoyance

“Unbearable!” She sat up in front of the bed, “Like she thinks she can come into my life and tell me how to live it, and tell me who I can and can’t hang out with, but that’s NOT how that works.” She crossed her arms.

“It’s annoying and I can’t stand how she talks about you,” Uzi said.

N’s eyes flickered with curiosity, “What does she say about me?”

“Awful stuff.” Uzi replied “She talks about you as though you're this mindless murder machine, bent on the destruction of the worker drone race.”

N’s eyes flickered at those last words, being reminded of what Brad had said to them about J, both sentences being the exact near same.

It seemed a few people may have thought that about disassembling drones, it was okay though wasn’t it? He understood it, after look at all the problems they had caused in the past, he understood where they were coming from, and it was okay if they thought that about him.

Uzi didn’t think that about him did she?

N looked away nervous for a moment, “And...you don't agree with her, do you?”

“What? No!” Uzi cocked her head to him, "Why would I do that?"

“Well I mean…I’ve done some pretty bad stuff in the past.” N sat up next to her.

“All the maiming, the killing, lots of other things I’m not proud of…” he explained.

N nervously crossed his legs, “I don't blame your mom thinking that, and I don't think I'd blame you either, I have trouble brushing past it myself aswell.”

Memories upon memories then played through N’s mind of thousands upon thousands of drones he had killed in the past, how he found them, if they had run or not, and what had happened in their last moments of life.

He felt his stomach lurch, and he would have thrown up if he hadn't caught himself just in time.

He sighed “but, I would still want you to tell me if you thought that, so I would atleast now.” his voice lightly cracked.

“N…” his girlfriend placed her hand on his shoulder.

She scooted closer to him, “No I don't think your a monster, as matter of fact I know you’re not a monster, you were just following directions given to you, nothing more.”

N exhaled, wrapping his hand aroud her wrist

“I've  killed people before, Uzi.” he pushing her away, “Men, Women, Children, and I didn't spare anyone.”

“You didn’t know any better!” her voice raised to a shout

“It doesn’t help anything though!” he cried, “No matter whether I was doing it as a job, or if I didn’t know any better, it won’t change the fact that I am a cold blooded killer.”

A tear formed on his screen, he tried to blink it back, but ultimately failed.

He then turned away from his girlfriend, wrapped his arms around his legs and burying his face into his knees

“And your mom is half right! I am a big murder machine, and at one time I really was committed to killing you all,” he sadly explained “but I do regret it! And it haunts me to this day what I’ve done, and I’m sorry, and I wish people could see that!”

N sniffled softly, burying his face deeper into his knees.

And then it was just deafening silence, for the next 30 seconds, the only noise was N’s soft cries, and the gentle whirr of the dusty old wood fan above them.

Uzi stared at him for a moment, she was at a complete loss for words, she had no idea N was carrying this big of emotional baggage, he always seemed so happy now a days, she didn't know he felt this way, about what he done, or what he as a drone was.

It hurt to see him so upset, and though she wasn't entirely sure what to say, she had to try to comfort him, somehow.

Uzi pulled herself beside him, N still tried to ignore the gesture, but before he had known, a pair of arms had wrapped around his neck..

With a shaky gasp and a jolt of his body, N stopped his crying, he straighted his legs out, Uzi burried her face into his neck, her purple locks brushing up against his chin.

N's eyes dialted as he looked down at the smaller drone holding herself close to him.

“A monster wouldn’t apologize for what they’d done in the past, and they wouldn’t care if people forgave them or not.”

Uzi explained, squeezing him just a little tighter than before.

“But…what about those people..?” he asked “All those people that I-”

“So? I killed people too,” Uzi recalled, “You don’t treat me any differently, do you?”

“But...you weren’t in control of yourself or what you did.” N pointed out

“Doesn't change anything. Still killed a bunch a people, didn't I?”

N bit his lip.

His girlfriend looked up to him, N looked down at her,

“I don’t care what you tell me, the things anyone says about you, or what you’ve done in your past, because I know what kind of person you are,” she explained, a look of shear determination clear on her face “Just like you said to me; I like the person the person you are, emotional baggage and everything.”

She her brows raised, as tears began to form on her screen as well.

N didn’t even know what to say to this, both touched and in disbelief that she had turned what he said back onto him.

She had confirmed, she didn't see him as a monster, they were still friends, no matter her mother would tell her.

His expression softened, he brought his hands above her and pulled her even closer into him.

“Thank you.”

Whispered N, voice as fragile as cracked porcelean.

And then, they two just sat their, arms wrapped around each other in comforting silence, understanding that no matter what either of them had done, they still cared deeply for each other and nothing was going to ruin the relationship between them.

It was around 9 when Uzi had returned to her dorm, she wanted to stay longer, but N had gotten low on battery so he had to go to sleep, (y’know being nocturnal and all that he had to have himself a sleep schedule.) and Uzi being the good girlfriend she was and knew he wasn’t insomniac like she was, let him be and parted ways, telling him good morning before she left, because well that made more sense that good night, didn't it?

。。。