Chapter Text
Dark light filters through the curtains. The room is dark, almost twilight, except for the glow of Matt's phone screen.
He told himself he was going to bed. But Instagram posts, fleeting TikTok videos, group chat messages with friends (if they could be considered friends) - and now it's 2 a.m.
His eyes hurt, head hurts. And he's about to put phone on the shelf, get comfortable, and sleep until 12 p.m.
But the door to room suddenly opens, creaking. He is blinded by the light in the hallway, and at first he sees nothing. But then he hears a voice. It is loud, hurried. Chris.
When Matt's eyes return to normal, he sees the youngest triplet frantically waving his arms, drool collecting near the corners of bitten lips. Chris closes the door, and it gets even louder. He changes the subject, his expression changing as well. Looks at Matt with big eyes, as if he expects support from him.
At first, Matt doesn't understand anything. He starts to worry, because Chris's agitation simply scares him. The youngest triplet is loudly telling something, either about some crazy plans for life, or about something that has already happened. A person who doesn't live with Chris 24/7 would probably have already called an ambulance and reported that he has a crazy person.
However, Matt has encountered this more than once. Sometimes the youngest triplet was too excited, too loud, doing incomprehensible things without even wanting to. It was Chris. It didn't happen often. But at such moments, he really needed help, because he just couldn't control himself.
Matt carefully gets out of bed. He is in only pajama pants and, as it turns out, it is not very warm outside. However, Chris seems red, hot, as if he was doused with boiling water, and it seems that steam is about to start coming out.
He slowly approaches Chris, trying to look him in the eyes. Tears are welling up in them. Chris knows he can't control himself, feels ashamed and humiliated, but he still paces the room, gesturing wildly.
Matt stands at arm's length and touches Chris's shoulder with his fingertips while Chris stands with back to him. The youngest triplet falls silent and stops. He breathes very heavily, but quickly, and because of this, his shoulders drop and rise.
Matt takes another step. His hand falls on Chris's lower back, stroking, soothing. Doesn't press on him, just touches gently, making circular movements with his fingers. Now Chris's breathing is starting to stabilize. His hands are clenched into fists, so that the knuckles are white, and blue veins appear on wrists. Matt is glad that he can calm Chris down, just by his touch, it makes it easier, because sometimes he just had to cover his mouth with hand.
He takes another step, right next to Chris's back. Matt rests forehead on the shoulder of the youngest triplet. His touches are still gentle, slow. Fingers push a little through Chris's clothes, feeling the hot skin.
His lips are so close to the skin. He himself begins to breathe heavily, although he knows that this can scare Chris. Matt's fingers squeeze tighter and... Touches lips to Chris's shoulder. It is fleeting, just a light touch, meaning nothing. Only to ease Chris's pain.
As soon as Matt breaks away in a matter of seconds, he hears a sob. Cry. The small area on the carpet, under which the youngest triplet stands, becomes wet. Tears fall quickly.
Chris turns to Matt with great speed and hugs him tightly. Although it looks like he is trying to hide in Matt, to merge with him and not come out until he gets better. He whispers "sorry" many, many times. He feels guilty for behavior, for the fact that he just is.
–Everything is okay. We're fine. I'm with you.
Matt presses himself to Chris's ear, whispering sweet words, supporting. His voice is velvety, quiet, and not at all accusatory. Matt understands what is happening to Chris and it does not irritate him.
He continues to gently stroke his skin, sending a charge into Chris's body.
They are pressed against each other, merged into one.
Matt carefully leads Chris to his bed, laying him down. Wipes away tears from the eyes, cheeks of the youngest triplet. Looks at him with such love.
After a while, Chris calms down completely, his eyes are already closing due to fatigue.
Matt moves closer to him, pressing his forehead to Chris's, closing his eyes. He quietly says "I love you", not sure if the youngest triplet heard these words. Sleep is already creeping into his mind.
At 9 o'clock he wakes up, and finding only warm sheets next to him, sighs heavily and sadly. Chris is gone.
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Chris had always been quite persistent and clingy, and certainly not with their appearance on the Internet.
Their room at lacrosse camp was again double. For some reason, almost all his life, Matt remembers living alone with Chris. Every camp, every hotel, every tent on a hike.
Wooden beds were far from each other, and Matt already knew what the outcome was waiting for.
The camp was only for a week, not that long, but Matt actually had plans here. The cheerleaders went with them and one of them was Chloe. Matt liked her, a lot. Probably even had a crush on her. Her blue-gray eyes were in his dreams, her dark hair sparkled beautifully in the light, becoming copper. Her slender figure with graceful curves excited Matt.
And it seemed that Chloe liked Matt too, she could wink at him when she trained, grab his hand in a group when someone made her laugh.
In general, Matt was serious. The only thing he didn’t take into account was Chris. Chris was always with him. And although he had friends here, he refused to leave Matt’s side even for a step.
It’s unclear who came up with the idea of open-air parties at this camp. However, it was a good reason to talk to Chloe. Invite her to a slow dance, kiss her.
The evening was wonderful. The music pleasantly echoed in the depths of the heart, anticipating the moment. They were sitting on a bench when slow music started playing, and couples began to hug each other.
Matt’s breathing quickened, his heart began to beat faster, his palms became sweaty. He looked at Chloe at the other end. She also looked at him tenderly, biting her lip, waiting for him to come up and invite her.
A few guys wished him luck, patting him on the back, and he headed towards her.
However, a cold palm grabbed his arm, digging into skin. Matt looked back. Chris was standing hunched over, holding his stomach with one hand. There were tears at the corners of his eyes, threatening to spill.
To be honest, Matt wanted to snap at his younger brother and push his hand away. But he could see that something was wrong with Chris. He was worried.
–Matt...
It was a painful whisper that seemed not to be heard over the loud music. However, that was all that Matt heard. The pain with which it was said.
On one side was the girl he was in love with, now she was standing nervously, looking at her friends, who were also nervously looking at Matt, as if asking "why don't you come over?" And on the other side, his younger brother, who was now suffering from pain.
The decision was almost thoughtless, he never turned to the girl when he took Chris to the room.
The sunset broke through the curtains, pleasantly illuminating the room.
Chris was shaking all over, his fingers tightly clenched on stomach, his eyes were closed.
Matt rummaged through bag, looking for the pills that their mother had put in for them for all occasions. He poured water into a glass and handed Chris a pill, stroking his palm.
–It should take effect in half an hour. Let's lie down.
Matt carefully laid Chris on his bed, settling down next to him.
The younger brother was still making quiet sobs. He pressed himself as close to Matt as possible, trying to warm up and relieve the pain.
Matt asked to lie down on his back, so Chris just turned head and buried his nose in the neck of the middle triplet.
Matt's heart was still beating fast and the same tremors as Chris's appeared. It seemed to him that could feel the state of younger brother, his whole body felt different.
When Chris began to calm down, and the grip on his stomach became less, Matt slipped his warm hand under Chris's sweatshirt, stroking his stomach in a circular motion. This is what their mother did when they were kids, and over time they themselves adopted this habit.
Goosebumps ran across Chris's body from Matt's touch and it became warmer and warmer.
He listened to Matt's measured breathing, calming down. His toes curled with pleasure.
Chris was already falling asleep, when the gentle voice of the middle triplet brought him out of this state, saying that he needed to go to the shower. The pill and Matt's caresses worked well, so he went to the bathroom without any pain. Matt went after him.
They fell asleep tightly hugging each other. Chris's head lay on Matt's chest, listening to his heart, while the middle triplet's hand stroked his back.
Early the next morning, Matt felt something on thigh. He frowned, thinking that one of them might have left a phone on the bed, or some other hard thing.
Opening eyes, he turned head. What exactly happened then, he could not describe.
Next to him lay Chris, hugging himself, obviously frozen, since Matt had more than half the blanket. His lips were shining from the drool that had flowed onto the pillow during the night. Hair was disheveled, coming out in silky arrows. His legs were intertwined with Matt's leg. A bulge was visible on his thin pants. Matt's body burst into flames. Crotch suddenly felt very uncomfortably hot, some kind of chemical reaction in his stomach was sent throughout body. Chris was close to him, and clearly not going to wake up, squeezing Matt's leg even tighter.
Matt bit lip, his hands reaching out to the skin of the youngest triplet. He stroked it gently, exploring it as if he was seeing it for the first time.
He also had that boyish morning excitement that comes at every opportunity. He would be lying if said he didn't feel the stickiness and wetness in pajama pants.
At Matt's special touch, Chris stretched, moving his pelvis, touching Matt's groin.
The middle triplet, looking down, saw Chris's cock rise slightly, swinging, hitting his crotch.
Breathing quickened, his heart was about to jump out of chest, and it was becoming unpleasantly wet below.
He raised himself, wanting to run away, but Chris's hand squeezed his fingers, persuading him to lie back down.
Matt's fear was much greater than it seemed. He was afraid and punishing himself that this was happening, that it was not normal. And can't even blame it on adolescence, when hormones are raging. He knows that it's because of the boy who is almost two peas in a pod like him.
Matt quickly runs to the bathroom before the white liquid becomes translucent through the fabric, leaving a sleepy Chris alone.
Now, all he can think about is this morning. Chris didn't understand anything, he didn't remember. This was a big plus for Matt, he didn't have to face humiliation.
However, there was one very big minus. Now he felt nothing for Chloe. Not at all. He remembered about her only in the morning, when she discreetly touched his hand at breakfast.
He no longer liked these eyes, hair, figure. To some extent, it was starting to irritate him. He hid from her, devoting more time to lacrosse.
In the evening, she herself approached Matt while he was resting after training.
–Hi, Matt.
He said hello, looking at her. He wanted to feel something for her, again. He wanted to feel that tingling, that excitement when he saw her. But he felt nothing. As if she were an ordinary girl he saw on the street of the city.
–How's your brother? Sorry, I don't know his name.
She mentioned it. She didn't forget, obviously hurt after what happened.
–Chris. I gave him a pill for stomach yesterday, so he feels better.
They sat in silence for a few minutes, and it was an uncomfortable silence, as if they had nothing to say, but they were still giving each other their attention.
–You don't like me anymore?
The girl asked quietly. Her fingers clutched skirt, waiting for an answer.
–Chloe, I'm... Yeah..
He wanted to explain, to say something. But what? That he suddenly didn't like her, and instead he experienced incredible turned on from his own triplet brother in the morning? It was unthinkable. Especially now Chloe means nothing to him.
The girl sighed heavily, bit her inner cheek.
–Okay... Bye.
Matt said goodbye to her, not feeling anything. Although, of course, he was ashamed of himself that everything happened so abruptly. He felt sorry for the girl that she liked him too, and it seems she also had plans.
But Matt couldn't do anything about it. The only person he wants to see now is Chris.
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Being alone with Chris was something special for Matt. He felt a tingling sensation in body, like an electric current, when Chris was nearby.
Their parents were at work, Nick was meeting his friends at some cafe. And now, they were alone.
In fact, Matt appreciated solitude.
He turned on the TV in the living room, comfortably settling down on the couch. Daylight was breaking through the window, speaking of a hot summer.
It was a hot summer this year. Nothing helped, not even the air conditioner that they turned on at night.
Matt was unpleasantly sticky and wet, he had to take a shower several times.
His peace was interrupted by Chris. At first, he did not approach him, only walked around the living room looking for something.
But Matt noticed him. It was hard not to notice how drops of sweat were deliciously rolling down Chris's skin, sparkling. His T-shirt was slightly raised, because Chris did not like to wear clothes in such heat. And he took it off. He sat down next to Matt and took off the piece of clothing, throwing it further away on the couch.
Matt had seen his brothers naked more than once, especially Chris. It was natural. But he didn't understand what had been happening lately. He began to pay attention to more subtle and deeper details that had previously been completely indifferent to him. At the same time, he was experiencing a strange feeling. He knew what it felt like when his thighs and toes squeezed harder from that happy, frivolous smile. When want to touch that light skin after a whole evening of games and watching movies. When want to kiss... Matt was afraid of this feeling. He kept it deep in heart in a small cage under lock and key. And perhaps it had been with him before, ever since he learned what it was to "love a person." It had been haunting him for a long time.
Matt thinks that it was all because of Chris. He knows that it was the youngest triplet who started it all. Too persistent, needy, and always clinging to Matt.
This did not irritate Matt. He loved spending time with Chris. But sometimes the guy went too far, making inappropriate jokes in front of friends at a party and when they were alone in the dark light of a lamp.
Matt looked away from Chris and towards the TV show after staring at him for about 10 minutes. His cheeks were burning brightly, and his heart was pounding because of the small space between them.
Another habit of Chris was that he was always very close to Matt. Too close, as if they were connected by a red thread that stretched for 20 centimeters at most. Their legs were intertwined, and their hands played with each other as if they were one body.
Chris was sprawled next to Matt, his legs spread wide. At first, it seemed like he was engrossed in the TV show, watching intently with a frown. But after a few minutes, his gaze began to fall on different objects in the room, his head was spinning back and forth, and his body changed position every few seconds. Matt tried to ignore it. However, he felt a piercing gaze on him, which could make a black hole in him.
He turned to Chris, raising an eyebrow, asking what happened.
–I'm bored, - Chris groans long, pouting lips. Damn, those pink lips that he liked to show when he didn't like something. Matt lingers his gaze on them, but quickly looks away when Chris turns whole body towards him. As if waiting for something.
Matt feels his fingers on himself. Chris begins to tickle him, moving from waist to his stomach, neck.
Matt laughs, tears appear at the corners of his eyes, tries to push Chris away, kicks him with his legs and hands, says "stop". It's getting hot. Chris also laughs, teasing.
When Matt has almost pulled away from younger brother's hands, Chris suddenly sits on his hips, puts knees on either side of Matt.
Now he has more advantages, grabs one of Matt's hands, pressing it to the couch, and tickles him with the other, sliding his thin fingers under Matt's T-shirt, pressing harder with his fingers.
Matt's head falls back on the couch, exposing his neck. His toes curl, his hands are clenched into fists. Chris stops, but still squeezes hands tightly on Matt's bare skin, on wrists.
They laugh quietly, looking into each other's eyes.
Matt takes Chris by the waist to throw him off. And the younger brother seems to rise, but... He falls back onto Matt's hips.
Now there is no laughter. His face is confused, he lowers eyes down, loosens grip on Matt's hand.
–What...? - Matt asks quietly, as if he is afraid. Afraid that he can scare Chris.
But the boy puts his hands on Matt's chest, clearly not going to leave. His hips start to move slightly, back and forth, infrequently. Chris leans down, almost hanging over Matt. Now his lower half is completely pressed against the middle brother's waist, the best friction. Looks at Matt, waiting for him to tell him to stop.
But Matt says nothing. He squeezes fingers even tighter on Chris's bare waist, guiding him. He bites lip, looks into those vulnerable eyes. Knows that he himself looks no less scared and confused. His heart is pounding wildly, head feels like cotton wool.
He experiences so many feelings. A knot forms in his stomach, pleasantly, but it doesn't let him stop.
Chris's movements are faster now. And although they are wearing light, thin shorts, the friction is not the most comfortable. But it is so sensitive.
They feel each other, they feel these bumps on their waists, which rub and rub.
They look into each other's eyes. They are both scared, their mouths are open with a weak sound, eyebrows are raised. But they are comfortable, feeling this way. To be filled with this unknown feeling. To send each other a current that spreads throughout the body, straight to the heart.
Chris clenches fists tighter on Matt's chest, his movements are faster and more insistent. Throws head back, exposing his neck.
Matt curses to himself many times. He cannot touch this, cannot kiss, feel Chris even closer.
They are desperate, the friction becomes irritating, but still fast and clear.
Matt thinks he can feel Chris's heat through shorts. The intense movement is making sweat collect on Chris's skin. He is wet, now making Matt wet too.
Sighs, heavy breathing, little sounds mixed together, it is difficult to make out where Matt's voice is and where Chris's.
The younger brother makes little moans, hoarse, very quiet. His back arches more and more, now it is as if he is RIDING on Matt.
Matt moans deeply and this feeling quickly covers him. His breathing became intermittent, chest rose and fell with each breath, like a tight ball of desire curling up tighter and tighter. Now Matt did not hear anything except these quiet little moans of Chris, did not see anything except the trembling boy in front of him.
–Matt...
Hearing his name, Matt tightened grip on Chris's waist, moving lower, to the roundness. It was said so desperately, so hoarsely, afraid... But Matt helps him, he himself begins to rise, making circular movements.
Chris presses himself even harder against Matt, his hip movements have become imprecise due to fatigue, but he does not stop.
The knot in Matt is tied even tighter, now it is inevitable.
Fingers squeeze Chris's skin until it bruises.
He sees it... A large wet spot on Chris's shorts, although the younger brother continues to move, slower now.
With a loud groan, Matt lets it go. His shorts are wet, sticky, warm.
Now Chris finally looks at him. There is fear in eyes, his lips are trembling. He himself is trembling. The grip of hands on the middle triplet's chest is getting smaller.
Matt thinks he can hear Chris's heartbeat mixed in with his own loud heartbeat.
Chris is breathing hard, his bare skin touching Matt's clothes, sticking.
A white trickle down from under Chris's shorts, some of it falling on the couch. When he notices it, he swears loudly and quickly runs to the bathroom, leaving Matt alone, confused.
It's hard for him to return to the other world. He can't think straight.
What just happened? Did he... cum on his brother? Did he cum from Chris's friction?
Matt is breathing hard, too. The wet spot is cold, sticking uncomfortably to skin.
He notices a white drop on his thigh, on the exposed patch of skin. It sparkles attractively, smearing across Matt's skin. He scrapes it with thumb. Brings it to lips, sticks out tongue... The liquid is slightly salty and bitter, with a milky texture and a mix of sweetness, Matt's favorite candy.
–What the hell am I doing?
Matt swear quietly to himself.
He wipes fingers and heads to the bathroom when sees Chris come out.
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Because of the coronavirus, their graduation wasn't the best. All those masks, all those rules.
But the graduates still managed to throw a party. There weren't many people, a lot of alcohol, a lot of fun.
They hadn't drunk alcohol before, maybe beer. So they were guaranteed to get drunk quickly. The only one who had a head was Nick. He'd had a couple of glasses and was pretty cheerful. He almost had to carry the other two on back.
Chris and Matt were laughing. They were having fun too, clearly not wanting it to end. Had been glued to each other since the party, not leaving each other's side for a single step.
Nick just sighed, looking back at the other two boys walking hand in hand as they trudged home. He pulled them into Chris's room, loudly closing the door.
They fell onto his bed. Took off their stupid ties. Matt lingered gaze on Chris. The neck of the youngest triplet, on which his Adam's apple was bobbing from laughter, was shining. Head was thrown back, his hair pleasantly spread out. Chris's laughter echoed throughout Matt's body, sending something warm, but still unknown...
The youngest triplet unbuttons shirt, his toned body on display. He sprawls on the bed, in the pose of a starfish. Breathes in deeply the summer air.
Matt looks at him. He cannot understand what is raging in heart, what his brain is so afraid to accept. Chris's half-open eyes, his silky hair, his pink lips, his sucked-in stomach that showed ribs, even his leg pulled up to the knee gave Matt a feeling of fullness, as if all of this was too much, but at the same time not enough, a lack of the boy who lay in front of him.
The sight of Chris turned on him. The tenderness and affection, the playfulness. The smell of cologne that the three of them used together turned on him, but this smell also mixed with the natural aroma of Chris, his body. That's how he smelled after lacrosse in the common locker room, and Matt caught it through the other stall even when the youngest triplet washed it all off. The smell at dinner when relatives came to visit and wanted to talk to all three separately (for Matt it was unbearable and incomprehensible, since the three of them were always together). Matt could smell it everywhere, the hairs on his body stood on end from how wonderful Chris always smelled.
It seemed to Matt that a flower was blooming inside him, still small. And this flower bloomed more and more when he saw Chris. When he gently touched him, when heard a quiet, giggling whisper in ear. When he looked into those blue eyes.
Chris looked at Matt, pulled hand to his hand, with a small touch persuading him to lie down next. He chuckled, his mesmerizing smile made Matt lie down.
Their fingers were intertwined, stroking each other, either fighting or protecting.
–Have you ever thought about the fact that we can no longer be together all the time?
Chris broke the silence, asking the question that had been spinning in Matt's head for a long time.
He was afraid of this. Separation from Chris frightens him. He doesn't know what it's like to be all alone in a crowd of people, to not feel the warmth of a boy who's just like you. He was definitely afraid of the future. And although they don't go to college, they do what they love, the unknown scares him. Sooner or later they'll move away from each other, they'll have their own families, wives, children...
In fact, Matt can't imagine anyone near except Chris and Nick. In his dreams of the future, they're all together. In his fantasies, he opens eyes after a warm sleep, and next to lies a warm, fragile body, turned with its back to him. The only thing that makes it clear who it is is this birthmark on his back. This is what makes it clear that this is his own boy, so beloved. This is Chris.
–Yeah... But I don't want to think about it.
Matt quietly answers Chris's question. He moves even closer to him. Now his hands are clenched into a tight lock, afraid to let go. They look at the ceiling, thinking about their own.
Chris rolls over onto side, breathing heavily into Matt's neck. This sends shivers down the middle triplet's body, this warm breath from the sweet alcohol warms him inside and out, makes feel things he shouldn't.
Matt also rolls over onto side, facing Chris's face. Their noses, foreheads are close, lips...
They look into each other's eyes for a few minutes, finding themselves there. Matt feels like he's completely sobered up. Chris's gaze has been cheerful and sweet all evening. However, now Matt sees longing, sadness, desire, which the youngest triplet is afraid of. His gaze also becomes sober because of the atmosphere. Chris's fingers find the middle triplet's waist, squeezing tightly. His other hand plays with the buttons on Matt's shirt, fiddling with them. He's worried.
–Promise you won't leave me
Chris's whispers echo in their little cocoon.
Matt feels Chris's body tremble. The air between them becomes heavy, but pleasantly heavy.
He looks into these vulnerable eyes. Chris is the same as he.
–I promise that I will always be with you
Matt gently stroke Chris on his cheek with thumb, lingering on the cheekbone. The younger triplet dissolves in this, adjacent to Matt's palm, like purring.
They pressed their foreheads to each other. Their breathing mixed with each other, the lips of one almost touched the other.
Chris moved even closer, fearing. These were small touches to each other, they trembled together, clutching their hands on each other more reliable. They checked the soil, simply caressing each other with warm touches, checking the other no other. It was slowly until Matt was the first to press on Chris stronger, sucking his lips. The middle triplet felt it. As a warm, humid tongue of Chris pushes into mouth, licking a small crack between his teeth. He began to caress tongue, enveloping own. Pink and sweet because of alcohol, Chris's lips pulled Matt's lip, moaning softly. A smocking sound is spread throughout Chris.
Matt felt a terrible heat, both inside and outside. He felt Chris's leg on himself. He threw thigh to Matt, pulling even closer to him. The hand combed his hair, and then pulled it.
Their small cocoon was filled with tenderness, love and intimacy.
When both had air, and the lips were completely bitten, they pulled away from each other, breathing heavily, everything was still close.
Matt several times smacked Chris on the cheek while he chuckled cute and clutching closer.
Chris was halfway to sleep, so Matt changed him and laid to sleep.
When Matt was going to leave for his room, after a 10-minute stroking Chris in the waist, the younger triplet looked at him with big deer eyes, which only Chris had. They sparkled, filled with joy.
The next day they did not talk about it. And it seemed that Chris forgot about it, he behaved just like he had before before it happened. However, Matt knew that he remembered. His gaze, his little touch spoke for themselves. Chris remembers this kiss. Their first kiss.