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Till is going to faint before he goes through with this. He is very sure of that.
This is stupid. This is so incredibly stupid. He's been staring at Ivan for the past five minutes because apparently asking your boyfriend: 'may I have this dance?' feels like an impossible challenge.
There's this thing in his chest creating an intense, definitely panicked feeling that makes him want to either run away or march over there and grab Ivan without any preamble at all.
The café around them hums with the noise of quiet conversations that shouldn't feel so overwhelming but somehow do because at the moment... everything is really fucking overwhelming.
Everyone looks so elegant, so put-together, so unlike Till, who's been fidgeting with his tie for more than half an hour because formal wear makes him feel like he's wearing a costume.
He thought about leaving, he thought about running away to his home and draw. But Ivan had looked at him when they arrived and said: "You look so beautiful." In that genuine, loving way that makes his face burn with embarrassment and something so much deeper.
And now Till can't stop thinking about how much he wants to dance with Ivan, wants to hold him close while everyone watches like in those cute romantic movies he secretly (not so secretly) adores.
Ivan turns slightly as if scanning the room. When he looks at Till, he seems to light up. He raises his hand in a small wave, and God, he looks adorable.
That's it. He can't stand here like an idiot any longer.
Till takes a deep breath that doesn't really help with the breathless feeling in his chest and starts walking. There's a buzzing in his ears that might be nerves or might be the beginnings of a full-blown panic attack.
Ivan's expression changes into one of concern as Till gets closer. His dark eyes are looking at his face. "Is-"
"DANCE WITH ME," Till says quickly and loudly, the words coming out with zero grace whatsoever.
Ivan blinks.
Till feels his face becoming completely red.
He fucked this up. He fucked this up so immensely, now he can never recover from this.
The silence stretches for what feels like an eternity, and Till's brain immediately starts shooting at him all the ways this will go wrong. Ivan's going to think he's being ridiculous. Ivan's going to realize that Till is just some chaotic mess who can't even ask a simple question properly. Ivan's going to-
"I..." Ivan starts, and there's something so soft in his voice that makes Till's spiraling thoughts screech to a halt. "Are you asking me to dance?"
"Yeah," Till manages, his voice coming out rougher than he wanted it to. "I mean... yes. I am. Asking you to dance. With me."
God, he sounds like an idiot. A complete and utter idiot who apparently forgot how to form coherent sentences the moment he decided to be romantic.
Okay, calm down. He can still fix this, probably, maybe.
"May I have this dance?" Till tries again, forcing the words out properly this time.
Ivan's entire face changes. It's like watching the sun come out from behind clouds. He looks... happy, there's no better word to describe the happiness in his face. Ivan starts blushing too, and he ducks his head slightly in that way that makes Till want to reach out and touch his face.
"You want to dance with me?" Ivan asks, and there's wonder in his voice.
The question hits Till, and suddenly, he's drowning in how much he loves this man. Because of course Ivan would ask that, like it's some kind of surprise that Till wants to show him how much he's loved.
"Yeah," Till says, and his voice comes out soft. "I really, really do."
Ivan nods with so much enthusiasm his hair falls across his forehead. "I would love to dance with you."
Till feels so much love, and feels he might just faint right here and now, not just from anxiety but from that love being so strong
Ivan said yes. Ivan said yes with that beautiful smile that makes Till feel like he's floating.
Till extends his hand, trying to ignore how it's sweating slightly.
Ivan takes it, their fingers intertwining perfectly like they always do.
As they walk towards a place they can dance, Ivan looks at him with such... intensity, with such affection and it's nice, more than nice, actually. But sometimes, finding words to describe feelings like these is hard.
They start to dance, it's something slower than Till imagined. It's really perfect.
Till forgets about everyone else in the café, forgets about his tie that still feels too tight, forgets about his earlier panic.
There's only Ivan, smiling that soft, genuine smile that's just for him, the quiet music, and this moment that feels like something out of those romantic movies Till loves.
When Ivan leans closer and whispers: "Thank you" against his ear, Till thinks maybe he was wrong earlier, he's not going to faint. He's going to melt instead, right here in Ivan's arms, and he's perfectly okay with that.