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One
It's not the first time Catra has managed to sneak up on a training bot. However, this time she tears into it in just the right way to cause a cascade effect that blows up the central processing unit. She's seen explosions in training video clips before, but it's different seeing it from close enough to feel the heat. Her eyes are glued to the bursts of light and dancing flames.
Adora makes an excited exclamation behind her, and it takes a moment for Catra to tear her gaze away from her handiwork. Usually nothing can compete with the shine of Adora's attention.
(She already knows which mesmerizing sight is more dangerous, and it's not the one that could singe her fur if she's not careful.)
Shadow Weaver reprimands her for using excessive tactics and wasting Horde resources. But after they go to bed, Adora offers quiet, breathless praises of her attack. The two of them trade excited whispers about their future, all the battles and victories they'll share. It erases any sting of disapproval from their commanding officer.
For now, Catra will be a little more careful in training to avoid punishment. But she can't wait until she's in the field and she can blow things up for real—and get to soak up the glow of Adora's pride afterwards.
Two
The first time Catra is allowed in the field, she can't enjoy it. Destruction is different when it's surrounded by people screaming—something about this feels wrong—but that's not even the problem. The problem is Adora is missing and she needs to find her.
When the idiot runs in front of her tank, Catra is so relieved she feels practically giddy. Everything is right with the world. They're together again, and now they're even on a mission together—one Shadow Weaver originally wasn't going to let Catra go on at all. Now she gets to rescue Adora and prove her worth in battle.
Except, Adora doesn't want to be saved. The small part of Catra that felt conflicted about this even before Adora showed up wants to listen to her best friend's pleas to leave behind the only home they've ever known. But how is Catra suddenly supposed to trust a bunch of princesses? Adora's judgment of them isn't worth much. She apparently still thought the Horde was good after everything they've been through.
They can't trust anyone but each other. That's how it's always been.
Catra may be the one driving the tank, but in the end, it's Adora who blows up their whole life.
Three
Catra never really got used to attacking civilian towns. It's one thing to capture strategic Rebellion bases, First Ones tech, or other resources. But destroying homes feels different.
Taking control of the seas is the biggest strategic win so far of the war. It should feel good. Seizing coastal towns to maintain that edge is necessary.
Despite the mixed emotions she has at the sight of the explosions all around her, some part of her is still drawn to the glow of it. Maybe there's a reason she's always been hypnotized by destruction. Maybe it's just her nature, and she was always meant to conquer the world—or to end it.
Even Adora doesn't believe there's good in her anymore. After the portal, the look in her former best friend's eyes was all fire. It was a look that promised revenge.
Catra knew in that moment that she had finally burned down the closest thing she ever had to a home.
Four
Catra sits in the windowsill of the cold, sterile ship and watches as Prime's armada carpet bombs a planet. When he is capable of all of this, resisting is foolish, no matter what Sparkles seems to think. The best way to survive is to choose the winning side.
The problem, as she looks down at the fiery display of power below, is that she's starting to remember what true warmth feels like. And it's never going to come from this.
Five
Reconstruction sometimes includes tearing down unsafe or unstable buildings. Catra was excited the first time demolition came up in the plans for the day, but she immediately questioned her reaction. She's trying to be a good person now, and she's pretty sure good people aren't supposed to enjoy blowing things up. Even if it's technically for a good cause.
Sparkles seems to take delight in her glitter-bombs, but she also almost destroyed the planet up once. Maybe something is wrong with both of them.
It turns out, Catra doesn't need to worry about whether enjoying explosions is a sign that she's irredeemable. When the first blast goes off, she finds herself trembling under a table.
The sound, the smell—she's right back in the war again, and she feels like she's suffocating.
Melog curls around her and does their best to help keep her calm, despite the noise putting them on edge too. Someone must contact the castle, because Glimmer shows up with Adora in tow after what could be hours or only minutes, and then suddenly she's back in her bedroom in Bright Moon.
Her girlfriend coaxes her into bed and they spend the rest of the day relaxing, Catra breathing Adora in and trying to stay grounded in the life she lives now instead of dragged into the undertow of her worst memories.
...Plus One
There were plenty of celebrations of the end of the war early on, but they were pretty informal. The planet was still recovering from Prime's occupation, and the priority was reestablishing essential infrastructure, not requisitioning party supplies or finery.
Catra hadn't really known the difference. Her only experience of any kind of fancy celebration was Princess Prom, but she was too focused on Adora her mission to really take it in. Her only other reference point was the party in the Crimson Waste, and the early celebrations after releasing the Heart felt pretty similar. Sure, there was less booze and more emotional speeches and hugging. But it was still just a crowd of people gathering in a makeshift space to share food and laughter and revelry.
The first official ball to celebrate the defeat of the Horde is a whole other species of party. Ultimately Catra thinks the princess-y way of celebrating is a little over the top, but she definitely enjoys how flustered Adora gets when she sees her new suit.
(Catra isn't much better. When she sees Adora in her flowy white and golden jumpsuit, she feels conflicting desires to never see her without it again and to rip it off of her immediately.)
Other than the dress code, some gaudier decorations, and fancier food—which is mostly lost on former Horde soldiers that consider anything not bar shaped a delicacy—the party feels familiar to those early days once it gets going. Lots of dancing, talking, and people randomly approaching them to ask She-Ra to kiss their babies for some reason.
There's one other major difference, but it doesn't happen until after sunset. The concept of fireworks has been explained to Catra, but this is her first time seeing them. She was worried about explosives being set off for a peacetime party, but Glimmer assured her that there will be no loud sounds or triggering scents. Most of the attendees will have some level of trauma from the war, after all, and Catra won't be the only hybrid with increased senses present.
She still decides to view the display from a relatively secluded balcony, in case she has an unexpected reaction. She's doing better with explosions—or any sudden loud noises—as time goes on, but they can still cause momentary panic.
In a way, she does have an unexpected reaction, but it's not the one she was fearing. There's something almost soothing about the fireworks. Arcs of rainbow light painting across the night sky, small sparks building to larger crescendos. All of it quiet and peaceful and a little hypnotic.
It's sinking in for the first time as she continues to watch that most kids on Etheria grow up finding explosions awe inspiring, they're just exposed to them in very different circumstances than combat simulations. Her fascination was never a sign of some innate destructive nature. She was looking for joy and beauty wherever she could find it in an environment where she was largely deprived.
She feels her tail wave gently behind her as she watches the night sky, and she knows by the barely suppressed squeal of delight behind her that her pupils are probably dilated.
“You're cute,” Adora whispers, wrapping her arms around Catra's waist and resting her chin on her shoulder.
Catra tries to growl, but it comes out as a quiet rumble that suspiciously resembles a purr.
Eventually, the pyrotechnics come to an end. With a sigh, Catra turns in Adora's embrace and tilts her face up for one last kiss before they have to go back inside and be somewhat proper.
In Bright Moon, there are books (which she would deny reading if anyone asked) where the sensation in your chest during a perfect kiss is described as fireworks. Having now seen the real thing, she understands the sentiment a bit more, but she still disagrees.
No light show will ever compare to how she feels in Adora's arms.