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EDIT: apologies for the typos I have edited this chapters grammar and spelling mistakes :)
It was early.
Too early.
The pitter patter of rain was the only sound present for seemingly miles down the street.
Hyun Ju never got too much sleep, but last night was barely that. Even a strong coffee couldn’t save her this morning.
It was a Monday, and the news of a new student was floating around. She was hoping it wasn’t her class room, since it was already almost full and she’s only one out of two teachers.
Being a teacher’s assistant wasn’t on her radar, however she wanted to feel needed.
It’s been lonely. In an apartment by herself, in a building with 3 neighbors scattered about. It was hard to make friends, hard to get herself out there.
She wiped her eyes as she pulled open the car door, stepping into the drivers side before the rain could put wrinkles in her shirt.
Working with kids was hard. But it was even harder to accept she couldn’t have any herself. She was at a point in life where she accepted she couldn’t be a mother. She didn’t think it was her calling regardless of it being her dream. She wanted to be the mother picking up her child from school, rather than watching it from a distance.
She arrived at the class room running in quickly, wiping her feet on the designated rug, pushing wet bits of hair from her face.
“Good morning” she greeted the teacher, out of breath after running a block from the employee parking.
“Good morning Hyun Ju. Rumors were true. New student today” the teacher sighed. It wasn’t a bad thing, just a lot of work.
Hyun Ju’s head fell back with a sigh. “Okay, I’ll get started on that ”. She took an exaggerated breath as she flattened the pleated of her pant leg. It was hard getting a new student settled. Especially when they’re as young as 4. However she liked a challenge and was overall excited.
Hyun Ju hung up her coat and prepared her teachers station before the kids arrived, setting up the parent paper work.
She worked in a program for kids suffering from illness. It was a comforting environment for children to feel safe and included, making it easier for them to learn. Most children in the program suffer with diabetes, chrohn’s disease or even a traumatic injury.
Children were dropped off one by one by their families as the day began to start. It was her job to find their seats and ready their desks. Today was an art project, as each Monday usually is. This was fun for Hyun Ju though, since she’s always had an interest in art but never felt too confident about her own, it was nice to be able to share that interest with individuals who won’t judge her or give her unwanted critique.
As the class filled up and became more hectic, Hyun Ju found herself starring at the empty desk in the back of the room, that definitely was not there yesterday and already prepared for the new student, name tag included. The sound of the door’s enter bell shook her from her daze.
“This must be Na Yeon” the teacher’s voice
Was prominent behind her, prompting her to turn around towards the family. It was a father and daughter, not something seen very often in this class. Hyun Ju fiddled with her thumbs waiting for her queue to start the process.
“This is Miss Cho seonseong, she will be helping you with the paperwork and getting you both settled” the teacher rushed away, giving Hyun Ju a look. The look of “you better do this right”. She was fairly new to working with the program and was under a lot of pressure, not that she had made any mistakes but there really was no room for that.
Hyun Ju nodded, and made her way towards the man and his daughter. The daughter helms her dad’s hand, partially hiding behind his leg. The man wore a puffer vest and baseball hat, which didn’t seem too suitable for the current weather, though Hyun Ju couldn’t judge since she isn’t seen anywhere with out a blouse too expensive for any occasion.
“Hi” he seemed exhausted, out of breath, probably from the same run in the rain she had to experience prior. She gave him a quick smile and nod before kneeling down to Na Yeon.
“Na Yeon? I’m Cho seonseong” she greeted the child with eye contact, making sure she didn’t feel intimidated. It was important especially for kids who have only experienced being away from their parents in hospitals.
Na Yeon nodded. She was timid. Hyun Ju didn’t get much info about the child, she’s only an assistant after all, it wasn’t her job to know everything. She just had to do something paper work and they were set.
“Can I take you to your desk?” she asked in a more somber tone than usual, since the class is extra chaotic today, she attempted keep na yeon from being frightened.
Na yeon starred through Hyun Ju towards the class of kids throwing erasers and fighting over who gets the pink paint brushes.
“I can take her there if you show me” Hyun Ju looked above her to the voice coming from the child’s father. She pushed herself up from the floor to face him.
“Of course” she smiled and made her way in between the children and towards the desk, glancing back to see if they were on pursuit.
The man kneeled down to the child once they reached the small wooden desk which was pushed between to others, still holding her hand. “Just for a few hours and I’ll be right back, Cho seonseong will take good care of you” he smiled before kissing her forehead and giving her a big hug, rocking her from side to side. Hyun Ju caught herself smiling watching the interaction, she herself didn’t have much of a good relationship with her parents, even prior to her transition. Seeing children positively interact with their parents was bittersweet to her.
Na Yeon sat herself in the chair still starring at her father. It was always overwhelming for a new student, it was always hard to get the situated in such a chaotic environment though she seemed to be doing well.
Hyun Ju pointed at the name tag taped to the child’s desk. “This is your seat, Na Yeon.” She introduced her to her desk neighbors who instantly started showing her their messy scribbles of every color marker they could find.
“I can help you with the paperwork at my desk” Hyun Ju nodded as she gestured him to follow her.
A stack of papers waited on the corner desk beside a pot of flowers and outdated computer that couldn’t turn on without a good smack.
The man took a seat in front of the desk, hands rubbing down his thighs as his lips were tight.
“Nervous?” Hyun Ju asked collecting a pen and sitting down, scooting her chair under the desk in front of her.
“First day of school” the man let out a forced chuckle followed by a deep breath.
“It’s always nerve wracking” she stated, clicking her pen and preparing to gather information. “But it’s a comfortable environment here … most of the time” she said eyeing the classroom
“Yeah, she doesn’t like new places”
“Nobody really does” Hyun Ju replied. Glancing up at the man, throwing him a reassuring smile.
That made him laugh. “Yeah I guess not, I just get worried she won’t adapt”
“That’s a normal fear, it can be quite chaotic in here but everybody gets along well. We do art projects on Monday, so that’s less scary for a students first day” She watched as the man’s face lit up.
“That makes me feel better, she’s a great artist” he shook his head, a big grin stretching across his face.
Hyun Ju gave him a nod.
“Okay, may I ask your name?”
“Gyeong Seok, Park gyeong seok. Park na Yeon is my daughter ” he leaned forward in his seat.
“How old is your daughter?” Hyun Ju scribbled on the paper in front of her. She always hated this part since it got kind of personal. She didn’t like digging into people’s lives like this, the parents always got reluctant.
“She’s five” his voice cracked.
Hyun Ju looked up towards Gyeong Seok, resting her pen down and laying her hands on her lap. “I understand it’s hard, we don’t have to rush” she reassured him.
He laughed, wiping a tear before it even got the chance to form. “Yeah, I just have never been away from her, even in the hospital.” Hyun Ju’s gaze softened. “She’s well taken care of here” she smiled, picking up the pen once again.
“I’m sorry to ask, it’s mandatory for the paper work. What’s her diagnosis?”
Gyeong Seok held his breath “blood cancer, in remission.”
Hyun Ju stared at the empty line in front of her, eyebrows furrowed. Blood cancer. They never had a student with cancer. She bit her lip, pausing before continuing to drag her pen.
Gyeong Seok seemed less timid after some small talk before questions.Trying to break the ice and make him feel better about leaving his daughter for the day. Hyun Ju saw a strong, and loyal father. She was more understanding knowing the severity of her illness. She couldn’t imagine.
They finished up the paper work and Hyun Ju saw Gyeong Seok to the exit. Gyeong Seok placed his hand on the metal rod stretched across the glass. “Thank you” he said turning back to her. “I believe she likes you.” Hyun Ju furrowed her brows, startled from a gentle tug on her pant leg.
She turned her head to see Na Yeon reaching her arm out. She was holding a crinkled paper, a drawing it seemed. Hyun Ju kneeled to her level, straightening out the paper. It was a drawing of the three of them in colored pencil. She couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle. “This is us?” The raised her head to the child in front of her. Na Yeon nodded, trying to hide a smile. “Your dad was right , you’re very good, thank you.” Na Yeon ran off back to her desk instantly picking up more paper and markers. The gesture made Hyun Ju blush. She tucked her hair behind her ear eyeing the child’s drawing. It was good. It was nothing she’s seen from a five year old.
Hyun Ju looked back at Gyeong Seok, who was definitely watching her the entire time. “She gets it from her dad” he stated, smirking . “You’re an artist?” Hyun Ju’s eyes widened. Gyeong Seok nodded. “I do portraits in the park, you should come by some time, free of charge.” Hyun Ju stood up, fiddling with the paper, straightening her stance. “Oh I couldn’t” she insisted, her head down. “Please” he laughed. “You’ve been a great help”
She paused. “I’m Hyun Ju” she looked back up to him, the rain bouncing off the glass door from behind, casting a blue reflection of light off of his shoulders.
“I’ll see you Hyun Ju” he waved at na yeong before opening the door, letting in a strong wind messing up hyun jus hair once again. He help his hat tight on his head. “Wish me luck, it’s a hurricane out there” he yelled over the sounds of strong wind and countless water droplets on the pavement.
Hyun Ju waved as he went his way. Standing in front of the door for a minute, running her fingers on the drawing. It wasn’t often she was spoken to in such a way. She felt comforted by the two. She felt soft.
She made her way back to her desk, plucking a piece of tape off the dispenser. The drawing made a home on the black screen of the outdated computer that wouldn’t turn on without a good smack.