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English
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Published:
2025-07-15
Updated:
2025-09-07
Words:
5,762
Chapters:
4/?
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6
Kudos:
6
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Alchemist Detective

Summary:

For the first time in years, the Detective Alliance came across a case that none of their detectives can solve, even their top ones. However, when a familiar detective group find someone who seems familiar with the case, they track him and get more than they bargained for.

Wato Hojo, on the other hand, gets roped into the DA’s business and becomes a valuable asset to them, while also becoming the root of all the mishaps due to his fantastical origins. Will he be able to handle his studies as an alchemist and a detective for the DA?

Notes:

Yes, I like Process of Elimination too. The characters are great and the story is immaculate. Fight me.

You should check it out if you haven’t heard of it. It’s great.

Chapter 1: The Case of the Love Poison Killings

Chapter Text

“Dammit! This case is impossible!” Rowdy shouted as she slammed the table in a fit of rage.

 

Gourmet immediately pulled the girl’s arms back. “Rowdy! Hush! We’re in a café! Don’t make so much of a ruckus!”

 

The older woman gave Rowdy a comforting smile. Seeing it, Rowdy calmed down.

 

“I’m sorry, sis. It’s just… I’ve never come across a case like this in my life,” Rowdy said.

 

“That makes all of us…” Downtown remarked.

 

The detectives were seated at a large table with several documents scattered about. They had come together to discuss a recent case the Detective Alliance had received some weeks ago.

 

A string of locked room murders had started to appear and catch the attention of media, which they started calling the Love Poison Killings. Each of the murders were done in the same fashion.

 

The victim would be found lying on their bed, stripped of their clothing, and their faces frozen in arousal. The cause of death would always be drug overdose, and the time of death would be hours before discovery. The victims would also have a strange red substance in their veins and leaking from their mouths. Lab testing revealed the substance to have similar properties to an aphrodisiac. Additionally, a crossed out heart would be carved into the victims’ chest.

 

What was odd about each murder was that there was no other evidence than that to form a proper timeline. Because of that, the case caught the DA’s attention.

 

But after a few weeks, all of the detectives were just as stumped as the police. Not even Founding Detective Vidocq, the DA’s top detective and founder could make heads or tails of it.

 

“I’ve seen a lot of strange and confusing cases in my time at the DA, but this one definitely takes the cake,” Downtown continued. “We have absolutely nothing to go off of besides what we know!”

 

“The last time I was confused like this, I was solving a string of disappearances that always took place at the same bridge,” Renegade recounted. “Let’s just say it took me about a few days before I realized that the bodies were being strapped underneath. Hehe~”

 

“Okay, ignoring that… Did anyone else come up with any leads?” Downtown asked.

 

“I wish I could say I have,” Techie confessed. “I’ve analyzed the substance that was always found the victims’ bodies several times over, but I can’t identify the substance or its origins. It’s as if the source of it is from something new entirely. Something no one has discovered yet.”

 

“I’ve taste tested the substance. It tastes like an aphrodisiac, but it also tastes very unfamiliar to me. I’ve never tasted a drug like it before,” Gourmet commented.

 

“In all my years of experience, this case is unlike anything I’ve ever seen. I can’t come up with a cause for it,” Mystic added.

 

“‘Shamefully, I must also admit that I was unable to find any more evidence,’ the girl confessed with shame in her eyes,” Bookworm said.

 

The other detectives also admitted that they were unable to get any leads. Posh, Doleful, Armor, Workaholic, even Ideal, the #2 detective in the DA and the de facto chief of the group.

 

Downtown sighed exasperatedly. “I never thought I’d see the day where there would be a case that stumped us. I’ve heard from Old Man Senior that even he’s drawing blanks.”

 

Techie brought his fingers to his head, as if concentrating on something. “There’s just gotta be something we’re missing! We can’t let a case like this be the case that stumps the whole DA!”

 

“But what, though? Even though we came together, we still aren’t any closer to finding any leads!” Downtown groaned.

 

“Lady Downtown, do not lose hope! As Sir Techie suggests, there may be something that eludes us!” Armor exclaimed.

 

“Yeah, Armor? Keep it down, will ya? We’re on the job,” Downtown commented.

 

Armor winced at the comment and bowed apologetically. “My apologies…”

 

As the detectives continued to speak amongst each other, Ideal nonchalantly stirred the coffee she ordered, staring into the cup.

 

As the #2 detective, being confused by a murder case for a few weeks was a big blow to her pride. And it was visibly showing in her behavior, what with her lack of contribution to the discussion.

 

Ideal knew that Techie was right. There just had to be something that the detectives were missing to solve the case. They just had to find that “something”.

 

Something like…

 

*ding-a-ling*

 

The ringing of the door chime snapped Ideal out of her thoughts, and she instinctively turned her head to the door.

 

A boy, seemingly around Ideal’s age, stepped into the café with a gift bag hanging from his hand. He had gray eyes and dark hair with a large curl at the top. He also had dark fitted clothing and a silver chained side pendant with a blue gemstone in the center.

 

Upon hearing the bell, the barista looked over to the boy and her eyes widened in recognition at the sight of him.

 

“Oh, Wato-kun! Welcome back!” the barista greeted with glee.

 

“Wato” gave a gentle smile to the barista and walked up to the counter. “Hello, Fujioka-san. I came by to drop this off.”

 

He placed the bag on the table. The barista’s she looked the bag, and her eyes lit up.

 

“Those coffee beans should last you about three months. I added a few new types as well for your experimentation,” he informed.

 

“Thank you so much, Wato-kun! I’ll bring these to the storage! In the meantime, I’ll make you your usual,” the barista said gratefully, taking the gift bag to the back of the café.

 

Once she left, the boy sat down at one of the nearby tables. He looked around the café briefly before taking out a book and reading it.

 

There was something about him that was intriguing to Ideal, but she couldn’t put her finger on what.

 

Despite his normal appearance, he seemed almost…unique.

 

“I’m back!”

 

The same barista came back with a cup of coffee after a few minutes. The boy got up and took the coffee cup.

 

“Thank you,” he said politely before sitting down.

 

The barista nodded before going back to work behind the counter. After a few minutes, she piped up.

 

“Say, Wato-kun… Have you been hearing about those Love Poison Killings going around?”

 

“Oh, them. I have. I just can’t believe that he popped up again…” the boy mumbled.

 

Ideal perked up at those words.

 

“He”? Popped up again?

 

“Again?” the barista said with a raised eyebrow.

 

The boy sat there like a deer in headlights as if he realized what he just said and didn’t mean to say that.

 

“Oh! Um… It’s just…” The boy struggled to form his words.

 

He then brought his voice to a whisper. “It’s just…I used to live in the area where the   first Love Poison Killings took place.”

 

Ideal was immediately drawn to those words.

 

She turned back to her detective colleagues and whispered to them.

 

“Everyone, do you see him?”

 

She pointed to the boy. “I need you all to quiet down for a moment and listen to him.”

 

While confused, the other detectives did as told and quieted down before turning to the boy.

 

If there was something that the chief wanted them to do, they would do it no matter how perplexing the command was.

 

“I-I’m sorry?” the barista asked, just processing the boy’s words.

 

He brought his voice down lower. “Don’t tell anyone, but I used to live in the area where the first Love Poison Killings took place. As a matter of fact, during my time in that neighborhood, the police actually managed to find the killer and had him imprisoned.”

 

The other detectives gasped, murmuring amongst themselves before Ideal silenced them.

 

“However, a few weeks later, he escaped and was never seen again. As a body was never found and never reemerged, he was presumed dead and the case was dropped,” the boy continued. “But now… he’s come back here. And he’s still killing in the same fashion as he did before.”

 

The detectives could only be in awe.

 

After weeks of finding absolutely nothing, they finally found a lead in the case.

 

“If you know this much about the killer, why haven’t you said anything to the police?” the barista asked in a low whisper.

 

“I don’t have proper evidence. And even if I did, it would be a whole other issue to show it to the police,” the boy replied.

 

“Oh. Because of…” The barista trailed off.

 

The boy sighed. “Yes, because of…that. And besides, it’s not like anyone would believe me. The people don’t even know about the first Love Poison Killings.”

 

The barista looked at the boy sympathetically. “I suppose it just can’t be helped…”

 

The boy took a sip of his coffee before getting up from his chair. “I should be going now. Have a nice day, Fujioka-san.”

 

“You too!” the barista responded.

 

The boy left the café, cup in hand.

 

 

“Did you guys hear that? That guy used to live in the area where the first Love Poison Killings took place!” Downtown whispered.

 

“How come I’ve never heard of them, then?” Techie questioned. “And what did he mean by it would be a whole other issue if he had proper evidence?”

 

“Whatever it was, it seems that the barista knows, but we can’t interrogate her about it or we’d be drawing unnecessary attention,” Gourmet said.

 

“We should follow that guy! C’mon!” Rowdy suggested with anticipation.

 

“Not doing that, so do your worst, Rowdy,” Downtown remarked.

 

Rowdy scurried out of the café with an excited look on her face.

 


 

A few hours later…

 

“So what’d you find about our guy, Rowdy?” Downtown asked in the lobby of the hotel they were all staying in.

 

“Well, the guy does a bit of charity work around this here area. Donates supplies to the local shops, feeds the strays in the park, cleans up the sidewalks, all that n’ more,” Rowdy explained. “I followed him all the way back to his place. I know where he lives now.”

 

Rowdy pulled out her dPad and pulled up a picture of the apartment building before showing the screen to the other detectives. “I took a photo for some of y’all.”

 

Gourmet patted Rowdy on the head. “Good job, Rowdy!”

 

“So, does that mean we have a lead on the Love Poison Killer?” Downtown asked.

 

Ideal smiled. “Yes, and we’ll be seeing him tomorrow.”

 

The detectives went to the elevator. Bookworm pressed the up button and the group waited before the doors opened. They then went inside and pressed the 4th floor button before the doors closed.