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Summary
Look, I was your typical guy until I- don't roll your eyes.
Okay, fine, I was your typical nineteen-year old orphan who breaks into shady corporate labs to break stuff and steal things. Happy?
Whatever.
Anyway, I was perfectly normal-ish, is what I'm saying, until the thing with the lasers and the -goddamn it- unicorn blood. You'll... figure it out. Probably.
I did.
