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Gus snuck out of the house, again. He confidently slipped up the stairs, avoiding the creaky ones he’d come to learn the location of through his previous escapes. Once up the stairs he made his way quietly out of the house, it was a still night, not many stars in the sky. He looked upon them anyway. The human realm was strange, different, yet beautiful. Despite its beauty, it didn't feel complete. Not without his dad, and not without…him. Gus choked down his feelings and drew a circle in the air with his pointer finger, it glowed faintly before he appeared. Mattholomule, a version of him, at least, illuminated in blue light, sat a step beneath him. Gus pulled his knees to his chest as he watched his creation look around, take in the outside of the Noceda residence. He settled on Gus finally and smiled slightly, just a quirk at the corner of his lips that tugged at Gus’ heart.
“You finally made it huh?” The voice came suddenly, distorted sounding, it was his voice no doubt, but it wasn't him. Gus could make his voice completely accurate whenever he wanted, but he didn't want it to feel too real, too hopeful, he couldn't take that.
“Guess so,” Gus replied, his voice creaking
“You’d like it here.”
“Then why aren't I with you Augustus?”
Gus startled a little, his creation sounded hurt now, looked upset, expression between heartbroken and angry. Gus opened his mouth to say something, anything. But it hitched in his throat and his eyes welled up with tears he couldn't push down. Matt stared at him now, seeming regretful but stern in his position. Gus knew his magic was acting against him in this moment, reflecting his thoughts in the illusion he’d created, but he couldn't help but feel guilty, he searched for how to reply, what would he even say when he saw the real him again?
“I’m sorry.” was what he settled on,
A faint touch met his shoulder, so soft he almost didn't feel it, the illusion stared into his eyes a moment,
“Then come home.”
Gus met Matt’s eyes, still crying like a baby at what was essentially his imagination, a picture, an illusion of his friend.
“I'm trying”
-
Things were tense. And Gus knew from the moment he saw Matt for the first time in months that nothing would ever be the same again after spending so much time apart. After making a show out of his appearance, as expected from his best friend, Matt took them to Hexside- err uh New Hexside. They didn't really have a proper interaction until Matt showed off his secret room to Gus and his squad. And for a moment things felt normal. As normal as normal gets on the boiling isles he supposed.
“Yes,” Gus deadpanned whilst talking to his friend, who by the way, never told him that ‘Tholomule’ was his last name.
“-many many doubts” he joked,
Matt smirked and hit his shoulder,
“Nice to know you always believed in me,” he said sarcastically
Gus smiled faintly and without warning pulled Matt into a hug, the shorter boy only hesitated a flicker of a moment before encasing his arms around Gus’ waist and digging his head into his shoulder. Gus held him tight, his head resting on Matt’s.
“Geez Porter I'm not gonna disappear,”
“I've missed you.”
Matt relaxed slightly at that, his grip loosened
“Yeah, I kinda missed you too. I guess.”
When Matt pulled away Gus noticed something in his eyes, they were so tired. He noticed for the first time since seeing his best friend how bad he looked, eyebags and torn clothes, he even looked skinnier than before. Matt seemed to lose whatever softness Gus got out of him earlier, he glared at him, and Gus couldn't help but feel like it was personal, unlike their usual banter.
“What? What's with that look?” Matt asked, defensive suddenly, venom in his voice as he crossed his arms over his chest
“We’re good right?” Gus asked, struggling to put his thoughts to words
Matt blinked the glare off his face, he frowned a little now,
“Yeah, we're fine.” he said quietly,
-
Things took a turn. Quickly. Later that day Matt and the rest of New Hexside were attacking Kikimora and her robot. Gus was running off with Luz and the rest of his friends when he felt a stone cold hand grab at his wrist, he turned ready to attack but instead was met with a familiar face, with concrete fists
“Where are you going?” Matt shouted
Gus looked behind Matt at Kikimora who was barely being held back and then at his friends behind him before meeting Matt’s eyes and pulling his hand out of his grip.
“To save the world Matty.” he told him sternly, before he could take off sprinting for his group another shout came, more loud, more impactful, more emotional than he’d possibly ever heard his friend speak.
“WHAT ABOUT MY WORLD!”
Gus zipped around immediately, he didn't need to ask to know what he meant and he didn't have another second to waste. Matt felt the same, Gus realized that in this moment of utter chaos. Horrible timing but, better late than never to realize you and your best friend have feelings for each other right? Matt watched him, confused as he approached and Gus couldn't wait another second, he kissed that look off his face. It was affectionate, Matt startled but eased into it, placing his hands firmly on Gus’ waist, it ended fast, with Gus pulling back and Matt staring into his eyes with awe of what just happened. A single tear streamed down his face but he didn't flinch, just kept staring
“Don't go.” Matt pleaded, both a statement and a question
But from behind the students had just been overpowered by Kikimora's abomaton, students flew in every direction as Kiki yelled and plunged for him and his friends, Gus kissed him on the forehead, a promise, a mumbled “I have too.” escaped him before he took off running, he didn't get a chance to see Matt’s face. The moment he set foot in the circle Luz slammed down both her hands to activate the glyph. By the time he turned around he was on the titans skull.
-
The next time they talked, it was in the middle of the night. Matt called him, and Gus almost didn't answer. The boiling isles was saved, it was being rebuilt, it’d been maybe two months, and they were barely scratching the surface on all the damage done by the collector. Augustus guessed Matt needed space when he was ignored or brushed off every time he tried to talk to him. But now, with his scroll buzzing loudly and the light shining brightly on his face almost in alarm, he hesitated when he saw the name but ultimately decided what the hell and picked up, only to be met with silence. After it stretched on for so long Gus thought maybe the other witch simply wasn't there,
“Matty?”
“Augustus.” he mumbled, the word came out of his mouth so quick and straight.
It frightened Gus slightly, he sat up in bed with his scroll,
“Is everything alright?”
With that Matt kinda chuckled, muttering something that slurred like “mm sure”, before Gus could inquire what was going on or what prompted him to call, Matt got straight to the point
“Why’d ya leave?”
Gus stayed silent, noting that each time Matt spoke it sounded strange, the only thing he’d been able to say straight was his name.
“Matt what's going-”
“Why the hell did ya leave Augustus?” he said, voice rising, his ‘leave’ sounded more like ‘leaf’
“I-”
“Twice.” Matt interrupted, yelling so loud Gus turned down his volume, afraid to wake his dad.
“You di- it twice an I wa-uh know why.”
“Titan Matty” Gus cursed beneath his breath, putting him on speaker as he went around his room, grabbing anything he might need for his…titan he didn’t know anymore
“Was it me?” Matt asked, every ounce of anger faded from his voice in less than a second, replaced with a genuine sadness that worried Gus more than his anger did.
Gus paused for a moment, the other boy burst into tears on the other line
“I’m sorry. I know I'm an asshole. I'm sorry.”
“Matty…it's okay. I'm coming over, okay?”
Matt hummed and then chucked softly again, he repeated sweet nothings the rest of the phone call as Gus flew over to his house, just a bunch of sorrys and whys and sniffles and chuckles.
Once Gus arrived Matt was on his couch, there was one scarily low bottle and container of juice on the coffee table. Matt glanced at him, his face was tear stained and his eyes seemed unfocused. Gus tried a smile, approaching him and helping him stand with an arm around his waist, Matt barely protested, just slumped on his friend. Gus looked around a bit, it was strange being at his place again, almost like nothing had changed.
“C'mon dummy, let's get you to bed.”
-
Matt groaned as he stirred awake without a clue in the world. He heard something plop down next to him on his nightstand. Somebody was with him. Matt squinted up at the other witch, blinked, rubbed at his eyes and then looked at him again,
“Morning sunshine.” Gus joked, or at least Matt thought he was. It sounded meaner than when they usually joked with each other. Matt saw Gus sitting at his feet as he sat up in bed
“What the titan-” Matt muttered, his voice creaking,
“Fuck my head hurts.”
“Do you remember last night?” Gus asked him,
Matt blinked at him and genuinely took a second to rack his brain
“Well- I remember I got wayy too drunk off some vodka cranberry…”
“Some?” Gus laughed,
“Those containers were damn near empty.”
Matt blinked,
“Then I-” he stopped, he pointed at Gus, baffled, he drew a spell circle and summoned his scroll, when he found his call logs he was immediately hit with regret, he looked at the witch on his bed,
“Holy shit.”
“Yeah,” Gus sighed,
“I was wailing like a fuckin imbecile wasn't I?”
“Mhm”
“Fuck Gus I-”
“Just stop Matt, it's fine.”
Matt paused and noticed Gus seemed angry, immediately he tensed
“Did I say something?”
“What?” Gus seemed bothered that he asked,
“Last night,” Matt urged
Gus handed Matt the water off the nightstand,
“It's spelled. Should help with the hangover,”
And with that he got up and left. Leaving Matt to believe he definitely said something stupid in his drunken state.
-
Matt stomped his way into the graveyard, Augustus, the boy he’d been looking for all day, sat in the middle, almost bored looking, which pissed Matt off.
“Okay dude what the fuck.”
Gus glanced up at him and raised an eyebrow,
“You just up and leave and disappear and it's been a week since that night and I don't even know what I said wrong.” Matt ranted
“You told me what you're too scared to say.”
Matt gawked at the response,
“What kinda poetic shit is that? Am I supposed to understand that?”
Gus rolled his eyes,
“And don't think I didn't notice you taking your clothes back from my dresser. What's going on with you, Augustus?”
“With ME?” He snapped
“You avoided me for TWO months after we kissed and then you call me drunk out of your mind and YOU are mad at ME?”
Matt clenched his fists but silenced,
“When I first came back from the human realm you said we were fine.” Gus said, standing up and storming over to Matt, he pushed at Matt’s chest with an accusatory finger
“You lied.”
Matt slapped his arm away and growled at him,
“Fine I lied. You disappeared for months, of course things weren't fine.”
“Then why?!” Gus pleaded,
“Because!” Matt yelled,
Gus laughed in disbelief and stepped back,
“Speak up, I know you hate me!”
Matt flinched at his words,
“Hate you?”
Augustus walked past him, hitting Matt's shoulder as he went, he stopped at the exit of the graveyard before turning around, glaring at him,
“If you won’t end things…then I will.”
Matt froze, his entire body trembling slightly, he smiled nervously but quickly ditched the idea, suddenly finding it hard to stay standing, his legs refused to keep him stable and he collapsed to his knees with a thump that caught Gus’ attention, but he didn't move, just turned to stare, waiting maybe, giving him a chance to say something, but all Matt could do was stare back, slack mouthed and desperate but hopeless and weak. Matt knew he looked dumb. But for the first time since he’d met the boy that faced him now, he looked mean. Augustus Porter looked mean. Who'd have thought.
Gus let the tears run down his face then, with a shaky sigh he turned around again, no longer facing him.
“Goodbye Matt Tholomule.”