Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

The three brothers settled around the dinning room table. Well, Gaster and Sans settled while Papyrus shook with excitement.

Papyrus politely began the conversation by asking how Gaster’s day was. Despite the fact he was itching to tell both brothers about his day.

“It was pleasant enough. I wish I could have worked in the lab longer.”

“*ya, know, if you’d just make a contract, you could stay as long as you wanted.” Sans reminded.

Gaster glanced at Sans. This was a common conversation. Gaster ardently wanted to work longer hours but monsters without contracts where only permitted to be above ground for eight hours a day.

“I have not met the right human.” Gaster answered.

A contract was rather personal. It involved linking souls. The relationship between the monster and the human tended to be akin to family or a romantic partner.

“SPEAKING OF HUMANS,” Papyrus interjected “I MET TWO NEW HUMANS TODAY!” He punched the air victoriously.

“*that’s cool bro.”

“YES, IT IS! INFACT, IT IS GRAND BECAUSE I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS, WAS ABLE TO BEFRIEND THE GIRL HUMAN IN NO TIME AT ALL!” Papyrus’ bones shook happily “WE ARE EVEN FRIENDS ON THE UNDERNET!” He took out his phone and showed his brothers.

Gaster smiled “I am proud of you.” His youngest brother was foolish at times but…Papyrus’ happiness was infectious.

“I THINK WE ARE ALMOST BESTIES!” Papyrus pulled up selfies he had taken with the new friend and showed the brothers once more.

“OH, OH, OH! I ALMOST FORGOT TO TELL YOU HER NAME! IT’S ------!”

Gaster glanced at the picture. It was of Papyrus and you making goofy faces at the park.

“You said you met two humans, correct?” Gaster inquired before taking a bite of food.

“AH, YES! THAT IS AN AMUSING TALE INDEAD!”

Earlier….

You were walking your father’s dog on a jogging path that circled the inside of the base. You were walking at an easy pace, watching people and looking at things. You had moved in with your Dad three days ago, after your mother kicked you out.

You were twenty one and by her logic you had fully transformed into an adult, so she had thought you should be living on your own or at least out of her house. You thought she was bluffing so here you are bumming at your Dad’s place for a month or two until you decide what to do with yourself. Moving in with Dad meant moving over 100 miles away so you had to quit your job.

You sighed, you where tired. Last night a certain furry A-hole had kept you up so you were going to take him on the longest walk of his doggy-life. That should insure that he was too tired to scratch at your door every five minutes tonight.

You heard foot steps behind you, someone jogging on the path. You wanted to be lazy and not even look over your shoulder but you had lived in a big city with your mother. It was not a good idea to let someone sneak-up on you there, especially if they were running. That’s a good way to lose your wallet.

You looked back. Your heart jumped into your throat but you kept a straight face. It was a skeleton jogging. You relaxed. Monsters where far more common on military bases than elsewhere. Only government or military workers where permitted to make contracts with monsters. With the contract the monster would be allowed to roam the surface and the human would be held accountable for whatever the monster did. You’d never heard of a monster causing trouble but maybe that was because of this contract/buddy-system the government imposed?

Anyway the skeleton monster was quite interesting. He wore a head band, boots, gloves, shorts and a crop-top that said “Jog boy”. You wanted to laugh but you held it in. It would have been a little too rude. He jogged right bye you. There was a teenage boy wearing a hoodie ahead of the skeleton. The teen had his head down as he walked the opposite direction of the jogger. Right as the monster would have passed the teenager, he sidestepped into the skeleton’s way making them both fall.

You had seen that kinda trick in the city, bump into someone and steal their wallet when they were too surprised to notice. Surely, on a military base, people would know better…and never mind the stupid boy was shoving something into the pouch of his hoodie. At this angle you could see but the skeleton wouldn’t have. You prompted the dog to walk faster as you honed in on the monster and teen.

They were standing up and saying their apologies. The monster resumed his jog and the teen started to walk past you. You dropped the leash, grabbed the teen’s wrist and twisted it behind his back. Your other hand went to his shoulder, locking him in place.

“Hey! Wha the fuck?” the teen shouted indignantly.

You ignored him “Hey!” you shouted to the skeleton. The skeleton looked over his shoulder “Hey! ‘Mere!”

The monster turned around and was jogging over.

You muttered to the teen “You’re gonna be real nice and give him his stuff back or…” you twisted his arm tighter “I’m going to pop your arm out of its socket.” You smiled sweetly at the teen as the monster approached.

“HELLO, NEW HUMAN.” The skeleton addressed you. “HELLO, HUMAN FROM BEFORE.” The jogger addressed the teen.

“Hi,” you returned “This kid,” you shook the teen’s shoulder “wanted to give you something.”

“REALLY!” You could have sworn you saw stars in the skeleton’s eye sockets.

The boy spoke “Uh, yah.” You nudged the kid. He used his free hand to fish out the wallet from his hoodie. He handed it to the skeleton.

“WOWIE! IT LOOKS JUST LIKE MINE.” The skeleton reached in his pocket, for his wallet “It’s gone?” he said to himself. Then he opened the wallet he just received. He must have seen his things “OH, YOU FOUND IT! THANK YOU, HUMANS!”

The skeleton reached forward and hugged you both. You couldn’t believe it. He didn’t figure the kid had just taken the wallet? You wanted to tell him but he was so excited that the two of you had brought it back.

When the skeleton released both of you from the hug, you let the boy go. He ran off without a word. Leaving you and the skeleton standing there.

You introduced yourself and the skeleton introduced himself. “IS THERE ANYTHING I CAN DO FOR YOU, ----? YOU RETURNED MY WALLET, I MUST RETURN THE FAVOR!” Papyrus struck a pose.

You giggled and looked around. You saw your Dad’s dog sniffing around. He had wandered a few feet away when you dropped the leash.

“Hey, Papyrus, will you be coming back here during your jog?”

“YES, I HAVE THREE MORE LAPS TO COMPLETE FOR MY EVENING WORKOUT!”

“If you wanna do me a favor,” you pick-up the dog’s leash “You could take this furball for your jog. He’s nice. He won’t bite or try to runoff.” You give Papyrus your sweetest smile.

“OF COURSE, I CAN HUMAN!” Papyrus took the leash “I SHALL THROUGHLY JOG THE DOG! NYEH HEH HE” He turned and started jogging. The dog in tow.

It almost brought a tear to your eye. That fluffy-bastard was going to be so worn-out! You laughed to yourself as you sat on the grass. Now to relax and wait for them to get back. You sigh happily maybe you’d stick around the base when you got your situation under control.

Currently….

“THE MALE HUMAN RAN OFF AFTER THE HUG. POSSIBLY, A HUG FROM THE GREAT PAPYRUS WAS TOO MUCH FOR HIM!”

Gaster and Sans exchanged looks. They could read the subtext of the story even if Papyrus didn’t. The kid was a crook.

“THEN ------ INTRUSTED ME TO JOG HER DOG! WHEN I RETURNED WE TOOK SELFIES AND EXCHANGED NUMBERS!”

“*that’s great.” Sans commented “*are you gonna hangout again?”

“YES, SHE SAID SHE WOULD BE WALKING HER DOG TOMORROW SO WE SHOULD RUN INTO EACHOTHER!”

“*maybe I’ll get off work a little early? I could hangout with you too.”

“WOWIE! REALLY?”

“*yah, if it’s okay with the boss.” Sans looked over to Gaster.

Gaster was deep in thought about his current project. Sans nudged him “Uh, yes?” Gaster looked over “What is it?”

“*I wanna meet this new kid. Can I get off work early tomorrow?”

Gaster’s eyes narrowed “You barely keep up with your workload as it is. Why should I allow it?”

“*’cause if you don’t I’ll be bummed tomorrow. I probably won’t get anything done.”

Gaster sighed, deciding that a partially working Sans was better than a non-working Sans “I approve of you leaving early if you complete your work.”

“*sweet. All I gotta do is some easy calculating. ‘be done in an hour.” Sans pointed to Papyrus “you and I are getting some nicecream and hanging out.”

“WHAT ABOUT YOU, GASTER?”

Gaster was still glaring at Sans for being able to get out of work so early “I will not be joining you. I do not have enough time in the lab as it is.”

Gaster paid no attention to Papyrus’ pouting during the rest of the meal. Afterwards, Gaster left the dining room, ready to work on a side project in his personal lab.

Sans teleported in front of Gaster “*it’s not cool to leave Pap hanging like that.”

“I have work to do.” Gaster started to move around Sans.

“*you are the only reason Pap and I stay in this house.” Sans gestured to the walls “*we make sacrifices for you. The least you could do is act like you care.”

Gaster was silent. He was the only one in the family that still had to live underground. His brothers could move into houses on the base but they had stuck with him.

“*come on, throw me a bone.”

Gaster chuckled softly and nodded before going to his lab.

Chapter Text

       Your cell phone goes off so you check the message.

       The Great Papyrus: HUMAN! I AM PLEASED TO INFORM YOU THAT I AND MY BROTHERS WOULD LIKE TO HANG OUT WITH YOU TODAY! WHEN ARE YOU FREE?

       -----: I’ll be free bye 3.

       The Great Papyrus: TERRIFIC! WE SHALL MEET IN THE PARK AT 3:10! DON’T BE LATE!

       ----: Aye aye, Captian!

       The Great Papyrus: NYEH HEH HE!!!!

       You smile to yourself as you put the phone down. You’re organizing your stuff in your Dad’s guest room at the moment. Maybe you’ll look for a job later…or watch TV, on a comfy couch, without a care in the world…damn that is one comfy couch. TV, it is!

     “HUMAN!”

    You turn and see Papyrus running toward you. You smile, drop the dog’s leash and run towards him. You tackle hug him, expecting both of you to fall over but he keeps his balance and swigs you in a circle as you hug. Your face is smooshed against his ribcage, the “cool dude” T-shirt he is wearing isn’t much of a cushion.

    When he puts you down, you give him a wiry grin and hug him again. You get your arms around the bottom of his ribcage, lift him up and swing him in a circle. He cackles and flails his arms as you laugh.

    After a moment, you put him down and turn to the shorter skeleton that has just joined you. You’re still grinning like an idiot. You’ve never had a friend like Papyrus. You met him yesterday but it felt natural to run and hug him like you’d reunited with a long lost friend.

    “HUMAN, THIS IS MY BROTHER, SANS!” Papyrus gestured to the newcomer. “SANS, THIS IS MY FRIEND, -------!”

    “*nice to meet cha kid.” Sans puts out a hand.

   “Likewise.” You return as you grasp his hand.

                 PFFFFFFFFFBBBBTT!

    You freeze and stare at the whoopy cushion that is pinned between Sans and your hand.

   …. Processing…. Attempting to think …. How to brain? ….

   You snicker then laugh. You break the handshake to grip your sides. You were not expecting that! You notice Papyrus yelling at an unapologetic Sans. It reinforces the laugh making you double over. You touch Papyrus’ arm.

   “It…” laugh “It’s okay!” snicker “It’s been too long…” take a breath “Since I laughed that much.” Breath normally.

   Papyrus gives Sans a warning glance.

   Sans shrugs “*it was a real rib tickler.”

  “Pffft!” you bust out laughing again as Papyrus tells you to stop encouraging Sans.

   Gaster glances at his watch before putting his lab coat on the hanger. He scans the lab. There is so much more he could be doing tonight. He sighs, it is two minutes before his mandatory curfew. He opens a shortcut and steps through the void.

   He is at the front door of his house. He gazes at the setting Sun. The house he shared with is brothers was built into the mountain after the barrier was broken. The front door lead to the surface while the back door entered the Underground. Only the porch was outside of the mountain. This assured he was not violating the law so long as he was inside.

   He opened the door and stepped in. It appeared that Sans and Papyrus where preparing dinner. Strange, Sans never helped unless they had company. There was no one else in sight and nothing seemed out of place. Although, something did feel out of place.

  “Good evening.” Gaster called to his younger brothers.

  “*sup”

  “GASTER! MY NEWEST BESTIE IS HAVING DINNER WITH US!”

   Ah, a human was dinning with them, that explained Sans’ behavior. Yet, something felt off.

   Gaster walked into the kitchen and observed the mess. They were preparing pasta. Well Papyrus was probably doing the work. Sans was likely hiding any strange ingredients that Papyrus wanted to add.

   Gaster was moderately perturbed. He was a scientist. He rarely had feelings of intuition and he was proud of that. A proper scientist should not jump to conclusions.

   Why would he have such a feeling of… foreboding? No… anxiety? No …. Anticipation? Excitement?.. He was stunned at the thought. That sensation was getting stronger.

  “Okay, I’m back!”

   Gaster jumped slightly and turned to see…you… You were right in front of him. His soul was fluttering…Time seemed to still as he beheld you… Your hair was pulled back. You wore a T-shirt and jeans with simple sneakers. There were a few drops of water on your forearms and even one on your neck. Your eyes where bright and your smile stole his breath away.

  “Oh, um, hi.” You held out your hand “I’m --------.”

  Gaster took your hand and shook it. It was warm and slightly damp. You withdrew your hand and he slowly dropped him arm.

  You glanced around “Um, sorry if I startled you. I was washing up to help out with dinner.” With a thumb you gestured down the hallway where the bathroom was.

   Gaster nodded then shook his head “No, um you’re fine. I was just taken aback. I hadn’t expected someone to be behind me.” he side-stepped around you “Please carry on. I did not intent to interrupt.”

    The frazzled monster made a bee-line for his room.

            ‘Well, that was strange.’ You think to yourself. Gaster, the eldest skeleton brother, had frozen stiff when he saw you. ‘Pfft, I wonder if that’s the reaction that Sans and Pap get from humans all the time?’

            While that awkward moment stretched on you had noticed a few things about Gaster. He seemed to have a more humanoid features. He still looked like he was made of bone but he didn’t have teeth showing like Sans and Papyrus. It was a little like someone switched skin for bone on a human face. He had cracks around his eye sockets. Each one was at least an inch long and had a jagged edge. His eye sockets drooped slightly, maybe because of the cracks? His sharp chin and cheek bones made his face appear hard but the drooping of his eyes made his seem a little softer. He had ridged posture and was at least six inches taller than Papyrus. He had black kakis and a light grey turtle neck on. It seemed business casual.

            As he spoke there was a warble to his voice. It was hard to name the sound but it was like static. He fiddled with his hands as he spoke. You hadn’t really focused on them but he seemed to be making hand signs, like sign langue, with one hand yet covering it with the other hand. He seemed awful nervous compared to his brothers.

            You look questioningly at Papyrus and Sans. Papyrus is busy with the pasta and Sans gives you a lazy shrug. You shrug back.

            “Okay, Papyrus, how can I help?” You step toward the counter.

            Gaster sat on the edge of his bed. His soul was beating against his chest, pulled toward you. He took deep breaths, trying to calm himself. Eventually, his soul calmed down, fluttering in an unfamiliar way.

            ‘Focus. Be logical.’ He inwardly commanded ‘You are having an adverse reaction to stimuli. Stop, document and theorize.’

            Gaster pulled a notebook from his nightstand. He documented a brief account of the meeting then listed his responses to it: dry mouth, disorientation, tunnel vison on ------- when in her company, anxiety, soul arrhythmia at varying intensities.

            He looked over the information. There was not enough data to draw a conclusion. Currently, he had two options. Expose himself to your company once again to for another reaction and thus more data or to avoid you in order to discover if your presence truly caused the condition. You would be leaving after dinner at some point so data regarding your absence was insured. More data could be compiled if he instated contact once again.

            Gaster clenched the notebook in his hand. Knowing that he would solve this mystery fills him with perseverance. He put the notebook down and made his way into the kitchen. You are at the stove, stirring the noodles while Papyrus makes last minute additions to his sauce. Sans is sitting on the counter observing the progress and supplying abysmal puns, to Papyrus’ dismay.

            Gaster quietly sits at the kitchen table. No one has really acknowledged his presence. Sans is probably the only one that has noticed him enter. Gaster mentally notes that his soul is pounding again but not to the degree it was before. He focuses his attention on your soul. It is a mesmerizing yellow. Justice must be your overlaying trait.

            Papyrus begins stomping his foot and shaking a finger at Sans, likely due to excessive puns. Gaster watches your soul light-up slightly. You begin to withhold your laughter when Sans resumes tormenting Papyrus. Sans questions this and you side with Papyrus, stating you did not want to completely upset the brother that invited you over in the first place. Sans shrugs and tones down the puns.

            You and Papyrus work in tandem to strain the noodles before placing them in a punch bowl Papyrus has provided. Papyrus turns with the bowl in hand to set the dinning table. You turn and jump at the sight of Gaster.

            His soul is racing, feels a blush spread over his cheeks “My apologies, -------”

            You take a calming breath “It’s okay.” You chuckle and smile.

            You flop onto your bed. Dinner was awkward! It felt like Gaster was watching your every move. You caught him looking a few time but it was mostly you felt it. It was eerie, there was a pull in your chest alerting you to his presence.

            You chuckled at yourself. When you first met him, he seemed awkward but cute. He seemed far too creepy now. You close your eyes and try to forget the weirdness.

Chapter Text

The next day, was Saturday and you were busy spending time with your dad. The two of you hadn’t been super close when you were a kid so it was an awkward re-connecting process. Not horribly awkward but it wasn’t like you had a close bond with him.

            In the morning he took you to near-by pond to fish. You talked and waited for the fish to bite. It turns out the pond was you Dad’s get-away when he was younger. As a teenager there were times he would spend the whole weekend at the pond. While fishing wasn’t the most exciting thing, in your opinion, it did warm your heart that he was sharing something precious to him.

            You told him about the skeleton brothers. He seemed open-minded about monsters, to your relief. You told him about Sans’ puns causing the two of you to have a mini-pun match in the boat. You recalled how you met Papyrus, how the skeleton was too kind-hearted to even assume the kid had stolen the wallet. Your father was concerned for your wellbeing; that the kid could have had a knife. You smiled and pulled the collar of your shirt down to expose a white scar. It was a three inch long stripe of white on your skin. You told him about middle school. One day, the little brother of your friend got in a fight. The other boy in the fight pulled a knife so your friend ran over to pull their little bro away. The kid with the knife took that moment to slash at them. They both got mild cuts. So you did what seemed right. You screamed like a banshee while tackling the kid with the knife. You kept the kid on the floor till teachers pulled you apart. It was the teachers that noticed your wound and flipped out. You had been stabbed just a few inches away from your shoulder. In the end, the kid with the knife was expelled, you got three stiches and everyone involved got a week of detention.

            Your father seemed to lose some of his color as you told the story. He apologized for not knowing. You reminded him that your mother hadn’t told him. After a silence he questioned why you would do that. You shrugged and explained it was the right thing to do. A friend was protecting family and got hurt so you jumped in to protect your friend and their family. It seemed right, it seemed fair.

            Your mind skimmed over the other repercussions of the fight. All the kids thought you were some bad-ass. Not the cool kind but the type to avoid. Some bullies would challenge you to fight. Sometimes after school, they would try to force you into fights. You joined the wrestling club. You were the only girl. You beat most of the boys on the team but you couldn’t wrestle in the tournaments. Knowing you were in the wrestling club ended most of the challenges to fight. Even after you left the club, in high school, everyone kept their distance. No one wanted to mess with the girl that was in a knife fight.

            You shoved the thoughts away and focused on the time with your Dad. You wanted to know what you had missed. What you would have known if you had been raised around him.

            It was Monday afternoon, you walked your bicycle and dog to the jogging route.

            “Pappy!” you shout when you see the skeleton.

            “HUMAN!” he sprints over quickly hugging you and patting the dog before continuing “WHY HAVE YOU BROUGHT YOUR COOL TWO-WHEELED RIDE? HAD I KNOWN I WOULD HAVE BROUGHT MY AWESOME FOUR-WHEELED RIDE! NYEH HEH HE!!”

            You laugh and wonder what type of car he has. “I thought I’d go with you on your jog but I’m outta shape. I’d slow you down if I tried jogging but on a bike,” you gesture to your two-wheeled ride “I can probably keep-up with you.”

            “EXELLENT IDEA, HUMAN! THIS WAY YOU WE BE ABLE TO INCREASE OUR SOCAL LINK AND BECOME THE BEST OF BESTIES!...besides Undyne and I.” he mutters the last part.

            You choose not to look into it. “Could you hold the leash when we go? I tried before and he nearly made me fall over.” You shoot the dog a look.

            “OF COURSE, IT IS THE LEAST I CAN DO.” He takes the leash and you get on your bike.

            After a few moments, you and Papyrus match speeds and are able to talk. You tell him about hanging with your Dad.

            “I AM HAPPY THAT YOU ARE STRENGTHING YOUR BOND WITH YOUR FATHER. SANS AND I HAVE ALWAYS BEEN CLOSE, DESPITE HIS PUNS AND BOONDOGGLING. GASTER AND I WERE NOT AS CLOSE BUT WE HAVE FOUND A TOPIC THAT INTRIGUES BOTH OF US!” Papyrus smiled.

            “What’s the topic?” you ask.

            “YOU.”

            You look over at him, looking for the joke in his eyes. It isn’t a joke. You swerve to avoid crashing into him. “What do you mean?”

            “HE IS VERY INTERESTED IN YOU AND ASKED ME ALL ABOUT YOU THIS WEEKEND.”

            “Like, what stuff about me?”

            “FAVORITE COLOR, FAVORITE FOOD, HOW WE MET, HOW YOU MET SANS, HOW WE HUG, WHAT WE TALK ABOUT AND SUCH.”

            You force yourself to pay attention to the sidewalk and not stare at Papyrus. He seems unfazed by it all. “It that normal? For him or monsters to be that curious?”

            “HMM, WELL ALL MONSTERS ARE DIFFERENT BUT GASTER IS VERY CURIOUS COMPAIRED TO OTHERS. HE HAS ALWAYS BEEN LIKE THAT.”

            You relax a bit. Maybe it was just how Gaster was and Papyrus’ lack of a brain-to-mouth filter made it sound creepy.

            “BUT THAT HAS ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT SCIENCE AND MAGIC. HE’S NEVER BEEN CURIOUS ABOUT PEOPLE, MONSTERS OR HUMANS.”

            And…the anxiety is back. “Do you think that’s weird? Do you think he’ll do anything weird to get to know me?”

            “HUMAN, AS GREAT AS I AM, I CANNOT SEE INTO THE FUTURE OR READ MINDS. GASTER IS ALREADY SORT OF STRANGE, SOMETIMES I SWEAR HE DOES NOT EAT ALL THE PASTA I PACK IN HIS LUNCH.”

            You let the topic go. Papyrus talks about the rest of his weekend as you kind of zone out. Whenever you think of Gaster for long you zone out. That isn’t normal. You feel weird around him, like there is a pressure in your chest. It’s not all anxiety, sometimes it almost feels good. But him pumping Papyrus for info is too weird. You inwardly promise not to hangout with him if you can help it.

            You zone back into the conversation. Papyrus hasn’t noticed anything. He’s going on about Sans’ puns and incidental music. You feel a pang of sympathy for the tall skeleton. He is too nice to really get back at Sans. Plus, Sans probably has more experience pranking and annoying people than Papyrus does.

            You start thinking of ways to get revenge. Sans seems to adore ketchup. Would that be a good way in? Ooooh. You inwardly laugh. You have an awesome, evil idea.

            “Hey, Pap, could you, Sans and I go out to eat sometime? I’ll pay. I know this Italian place Dad and I passed when we were off the base… Gaster can come too.” You have to add Gaster in. It would seem too strange and rude if you didn’t. All you can do is pray he can’t go.

            “OF COURSE, I WOULD BE DELIGHTED TO HAVE A FRIEND DATE WITH YOU,”

            ‘Date?’ you think.

“AND SANS NEVER TURNS DOWN FREE FOOD. UNFORTUNATLY, GASTER WILL BE UNABLE TO ATTEND,”

‘All of my praise to whatever deity is out there!’

“HE IS NOT ALLOWED OFF THIS BASE.”

That raised a red flag “Why not?”

“HE HAS NOT MADE A CONTRACT WITH A HUMAN. NOT BEING ABLE TO LEAVE GOVERNMENT GROUND AND HAVING EIGHT HOURS OUTSIDE OF THE UNDERGROUND ARE THE LARGEST PITFALLS OF NOT HAVING A CONTRACT.”

“Huh.” You hadn’t known about that.

“IF HE WOULD HAVE MADE A CONTRACT WITH FRISK AS SANS AND I DID, HE WOULD NOT HAVE SUCH LIMITATIONS BUT HE IS BEING A BONEHEAD.”

“Sorry, Pappy.”

“IT IS NOTHING THE GREAT PAPYRUS CANNOT OVER COME! NYEH HEH HE!”

Papyrus was dazzled by the Italian restaurant you took he and Sans to. The tall skeleton practically had stars in his eye sockets. Sans seemed pleased. He was cracking several Italian cuisine related jokes and puns, to Papyrus’ embarrassment.

Everything was perfect for your revenge, on Papyrus’ behalf.

When the three of you ordered your drinks, Sans turned down the offer. Instead, grabbed the ketchup that was on the table.

“Hey, Sans, wait.” You rummaged through your tote bag and pulled out a still cold bottle of ketchup.

“Thought you might appreciate it.” you explain as you hand it to him.

“*thanks, kiddo.”

“No problem.” You shrugged.

Sans popped the cap and took a swig. He coughed and the red condiment sprayed from his mouth, eye sockets wide with surprise.

“SANS!!!!” Papyrus roared as his brother covered the table with red droplets.

“*the fuck was that kid?!” Sans yelled at you.

You were laughing too hard but managed to say “You should see your face.”

“*kid?!”

“WHAT’S GOING ON?” Papyrus looked between the two of you.

“It was revenge! Red mustard in a ketchup bottle!” The two monsters could see your yellow soul glow with justice “Revenge for being punning the heck outta Pappy.” You explain.

“NYEH HEH HE!” Papryus put an arm around your shoulder and pulled you into a side-hug “I DID NOT KNOW THAT YOU CARED SO DEEPLY, HUMAN! BUT THEN AGAIN, HOW COULD YOU NOT? I AM THE GREAT PAPYRUS! THANK YOU, HUMAN, FOR AVENGING ME.”

“What are friends for?” You return the hug.

“NYEH HE! YOU ARE A TRUE BESTIE INDEED!”

“Thanks!” you give Papyrus one last squeeze before moving apart and looking to Sans “We okay?” you ask the short skeleton.

“*heh, tibia honest kid, that was a good prank.”

Papyrus groaned and you rolled your eyes. The rest of the meal went well. The three of you chatted and thoroughly enjoyed the Italian food. Sans made a few puns but kept it to a minimum. The prank was pretty good but he didn’t want to incur your wrath again. It warmed his bones knowing Papyrus had a friend that would stick-up for him. Yes, this was a rather mild case but Sans was aware how driven yellow souls could be. If you thought Papyrus deserved justice for some bad puns, you’d definitely have his back in a serious fight.

Sans and Papyrus entered their home to be immediately interrogated by Gaster.

“How was your outing?” Gaster’s voice was a little stressed and he was absentmindedly wringing his hands.

Sans let Papyrus do the talking. The short skeleton grabbed a bottle of ketchup from the fridge, sat on the couch and flipped on the TV. Papyrus was giving Gaster a play by play of the evening. Sans noticed Gaster was signing as Papyrus spoke. Normally, Gaster did that in the lab when he wanted to make a mental note. Sans shrugged it off and began to channel surf.

“SANS, WOULD YOU READ ME A “FLUFFY BUNNY” STORY TONIGHT?” Papyrus asked after telling Gaster all he could recall.

“*heh, sure bro. go get ready for bed. I’ll be there in a bit.”

Papyrus left the room, leaving Gaster and Sans together.

“Did you enjoy the outing, brother?” Gaster asked.

“*yah, heh, kid was pretty fun. Pap told you ‘bout the ketchup-mustard switch, right?” Sans kept his eye on the TV program.

“Yes, he did inform me of that.” Gaster paused for a moment “Sans, have you noticed anything about ------?”

Sans looked to his brother “*like what?”

Gaster fiddled with his hands “Have you experienced strange stimuli, any odd feelings, when around -------?”

“*nah. well, the ketchup prank was kind’a a “strange stimuli”.”

Gaster seemed slightly frustrated “Has your soul responded to her presence?”

Sans’ bone-brows raised “*no. look Gast’, why are you askin’ about this?”

Gaster looked away while wringing his hands “I-I have not formed a hypothesis. I need more information.”

Deciding it wasn’t anything huge, Sans turned back to the TV “*have fun with that bro.”

Gaster turned back to him “Sans, I require your assistance. Help me gather data.”

Sans kept his eyes on the TV “*that sounds like a lot of work and we both know, I don’t do work.” He slouched into the couch, attempting to appear as lazy as possible.

Gaster was filled with perseverance. “I will purchase a small refrigerator and stock it with ketchup for you to keep in your room.”

Sans turned the TV off and looked at Gaster. “*what is it I’m doin’?”

“I need data regarding --------, as much as you can gather.”

“*why do yah need that?” Sans quirked a brow.

Gaster looked away, pondering for a moment. “I believe she has…” he stopped “The information is pertinent to my research of Souls.”

“SANS!!! I HAVE PREPARED TO CRUISE AND SNOOZE!” Papyrus called from his room.

“*yah got a deal.” Sans winked at Gaster before teleporting to Papyrus’ room.