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Nicholas wouldn't say he particularly hated fruits.
Most days in winter, Nicholas found it immensely challenging to get out of bed. Well, he never found it easy, but for some reason, it was so much harder in the biting cold weather.
Each morning, he barely had time to pack himself any food. It wasn't like it bothered him though, since the stress of his classes completely destroyed his appetite. Instead, he resorted to quickly cutting up strawberries and scoffing them down while sprinting to campus. Fast and delicious. Maybe not so filling.
"Didn't bring lunch again, Nichol?" a voice questioned as Nicholas sat down on his regular cafeteria bench. He sat facing the person who had asked the question, but managed avoided eye contact.
The dead silence was all they needed as an answer. "You need to stop skipping your lunches," they scolded, yet missing any signs of malice behind their tone.
Nicholas scrunched up his face like a grumpy kitty, continuing to face away. Picking at his fingernails — or lack of fingernails, as he was always biting them — he grunted, "It doesn't matter, Euijoo."
A frown painted over the boy's mouth before he reached out to turn Nicholas' face, looking him in the eyes. "But it does! By the time you graduate, you're gonna turn into a strawberry."
Though he had already let go, the touch from Euijoo's hand lingered on his cheek, buzzing like one's tongue after eating a lemon. Nicholas could feel all of his insides twisting and turning as if he was blending fruits with his stomach, a smoothie pooling in his tummy.
A few words in Mandarin were mumbled, shortly followed by a chuckle from the other, "You better not be performing witch curses on me or something, that's kinda rude considering I'm tryna help you."
"It's really fine, I promise," he shook his head. "I don't have to eat."
" Yixiang ," Euijoo urged, tone more stern than before. "I'm not here to listen to you justify not eating, because it's not working and you're wrong anyway. You have to eat."
Nicholas' head shot up at that statement. Did Euijoo seriously think that using his birth name would get his words to reach him? If so, he was completely right, and Nicholas was internally freaking out. It was such a simple thing — his whole family referred to him with that name, it was what he was called since he was young, much prior to moving to Korea. Then why did it feel so weird coming from Euijoo? He didn't say it significantly different to anybody else, but to Nicholas, this was different. He didn't feel this prickly, durian spike ache in his chest with anyone else.
All of a sudden, a hot feeling crawled up his neck. It was probably just the heater blasting in the cafeteria, he was sure. Still, Euijoo wouldn't give up, and shined his stupidly perfect smile as he pulled two containers from his lunchbox. He innocently placed one in front of him and the second by Nicholas' bunched up fists.
"What?" Nicholas furrowed his eyebrows, staring at the container like Euijoo had put some weird, abstract art in front of him.
Euijoo didn't utter a word, and simply opened his own container to begin eating. Even though he had a great poker face, Nicholas could see the tiniest amount of amusement in his eyes. That infuriated him. What's so funny about this?
His attention drew back to the container sitting on the table. Is he waiting for me to open it? But Nicholas was sceptical. Surely Euijoo didn't plant a bomb in this or something, right?
Hesitantly, he lifted the lid and revealed the contents. Inside of the container, there was bibimbap with a seasoned fried egg on top and next to it, a small clementine. The smell quickly entered Nicholas' nose as he took in what was really happening.
A small noise escaped Nicholas, which wasn't quite a gasp, but still out of shock. His gaze ripped to Euijoo once again and he exclaimed, "J-Juju...!"
"Hm?" Euijoo's eyes finally looked up from his food and met Nicholas'. "Is something wrong?"
Yes. Everything is wrong about this, Euijoo! Nicholas wanted to scream. Instead he mumbled, "No, I just..."
The black-haired boy closed his mouth, opened it again, and then closed it once more. Why was he so wordless? Don't all friends give each other food? Nicholas had recognised the meal — on majority of days, Euijoo would bring homemade food for lunch and offer it to him, yet he'd decline every time. He didn't understand why it felt so different that it was sitting in front him, for him.
The way Euijoo's body language was so casual — his face soft as ever, no jitter in his movements — completely contrasted from Nicholas, and that was frustrating. Maybe Euijoo was right; if you compared him to a strawberry at that moment, you wouldn't have been able to tell the difference. His widened eyes, as big as a mango stone, darted between the bibimbap and the brunet boy while his hands remained frantic for seemingly eternity. Even if he tried talking, it wouldn't have worked since his throat was fully dry and stripped of any ability to function.
Nicholas hated this. He hated the tingly feeling, the lack of moisture in his throat, everything. It reminded him of when you eat a kiwifruit that isn't exactly ripe yet, so the juices and seeds leave a scratchy feeling all over your tongue, and no matter how much water you drink, it annoyingly stays. Nicholas had known Euijoo for pretty much forever and he was always, always there. But he despised the fact he cared so much, how he could stay and watch Nicholas peel himself apart like a banana all over simple, kind actions that meant nothing to him except for making his best friend happy. Like all good friends do.
"Well, I hope you like it," Euijoo's eyes crinkled with a syrupy grin. Nicholas tried extremely hard to ignore the spike in his heartrate, though it felt as if he was about to go into cardiac arrest. "I made it especially for you, since I knew you wouldn't bring lunch today as well."
The shorter swallowed in an attempt to clear his throat, picking up the chopsticks laid neatly in the middle of the container. "Yeah, th-thanks a lot..."
He wished he could have said more. Pour out the smoothie that was churning in his stomach, spit out the pips of the kiwifruit and let his feelings spill, but his mouth was too full.
Euijoo was addicting, too addicting that it terrified him. However, he still kept going for more, biting the citrusy flesh and savouring the flavour. Like a grapefruit — he was gut-wrenchingly irresistible and left him longing for a better taste, yet there was something unnerving about the sour aftertaste. It made him nauseous, it was bittersweet, and Nicholas didn't know what to do.
Nicholas wouldn't say he particularly hated fruits, but Euijoo was starting to make him second guess.
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The perfect way to describe winter in Nicholas' books was 'harsh'. Even if he wore layers upon layers of clothing, he somehow ended up freezing to death anyway. Nothing could have made him like winter.
Now was one of those times where he felt this way. Standing in the middle of a random part of the campus — nose turning a slight shade of pink from the crisp wind, fingertips numb, arms crossed. Realistically, he should have been walking to the library to study, but that was impossible since he quite literally felt like a statue frozen into place. No matter how much he tried to avoid the cold, it never seemed to leave him.
"Nichol!" a voice called, sounding overly joyful considering he was currently in a situation where you should definitely not feel even the smallest amount of joy. Only one person in this world used that nickname, so he could effortlessly put a name to the voice. But then again, he could recognise that voice even when it was drowning in huge gusts of wind.
"Euijoo..." Nicholas managed to murmur out much less excitedly, mouth practically paralysed.
Euijoo's face washed over with concern as he stared at the quaking boy, "Hey, are you alright?" he put a hand on his shoulder.
Nicholas tensed up at the touch, the warmth of Euijoo's hand quickly spreading all over his arm and neck. Unless it was that same sensation he experienced every time Euijoo made contact with him — he wasn't sure.
He couldn't make up a response, which caused the taller to giggle ever so quietly. He spoke through a laugh, "Oh, you poor thing, this is why I tell you to wear warmer clothing. I get you think fashion equals beauty and beauty equals pain, but don't come to me when you catch twenty different illnesses!"
There was nothing he could do to protest against that. He hated how Euijoo was always right, though he never boasted about it, how he treated Nicholas as if he was his child and advised him to do things properly, how he always knew exactly what to say all the damn time! Nicholas did everything in his power to throw snarky remarks back, but now it felt like he was a grape and Euijoo was a jackfruit.
The iced boy looked up at the other, a glint of pleading in his eyes. He didn't know what he was trying to hint at, beg for, but nothing would have prepared him for what Euijoo was about to do.
"Gosh, you're truly hopeless," he shook his head, beginning to take his scarf off from around his neck.
Honestly, Nicholas hadn't even realised that he was wearing that same beige, knitted scarf since it was such an often occurrence. It just blended in whenever he would see him. Or because he was too busy staring at his round eyes, softest smile that lifted in the corners paired with rose-tinted cheeks. Euijoo had unmatched beauty, one that Nicholas had never noticed in anyone before he met him. It was uncontrollable for him to look, just for a little longer than he did for others. Admire him even though he didn't care much for appearance whether it be things or people. Laying eyes on him was valuable, it almost felt illegal to gaze at someone so pretty for too long in fears of tainting their beautifulness.
Also, did he mention that Euijoo had the softest, most comforting smile ever? Oh, he did. Well, it was true. The way Euijoo smiled at him now, holding the scarf with two hands, careful for it not to graze the god-knows-what-had-touched-it-in-the-past ground. He looked at Nicholas like he hung the stars up into the sky, but he did the same too, so at least it was mutual.
All of a sudden, Euijoo took a step closer to Nicholas, and shortly after he felt a strong heat fold over his neck and Euijoo's slender fingers trickle down his biceps and forearms. His mouth was soon buried in a fuzzy fabric and it drooped down the sides of his arms. Huh?
"You won't die in the cold now, I hope," Euijoo fiddled with the end of the scarf that was no longer worn by him, but Nicholas instead. "Don't worry, you can keep it for as long as you want. But give it back eventually, it's my favourite."
Nicholas was beyond thankful for the scarf covering majority of his face, because he probably looked like a blushing mess in that moment. Red as a tomato, mushy inside like when you accidentally squish raspberries between the pads of your fingers before actually being able to eat them. His heart was most likely beating so fast that it was about to blow up into a mix of a million different fruit juices.
And also no, he wasn't planning on giving it back any time soon. He would indeed be exploiting the fact he said 'keep it as long as you want'.
The scarf was just as cosy as the owner himself. Nicholas and Euijoo were opposite in many, many ways, but their difference in body temperatures was one of the obvious ones. Nicholas always seemed to be like Antarctica personified and Euijoo could easily be someone's personal heater. The heat from the accessory travelled at a rapid speed throughout his entire body, yet chills still ran down his spine even faster. He didn't understand why his own best friend made him so nervous. Surely all best friends lended each other their clothes, right?
It wasn't long before the smell of Euijoo filled his nostrils. The familiar floral, orange blossom scent that he had smelt like for years. It made Nicholas feel a buzzing inside of his chest, like the way you feel after you bundle yourself up in thousands of blankets on a day where it's far too cold to do anything. Euijoo had a very distinct aroma and Nicholas had it engraved in his brain, tattooed on his arm, pasted in his long-term memory forever until he died.
Sometimes when he would visit Nicholas' dorm and they would nap together, he would get a tiny whiff of him, just for a moment. Then when he would go to his, he would secretly spray his things with the perfume so they could share his fragrance, despite it only lasting for a day or so. It did sound really creepy and obsessive out loud though...
Was he making it too obvious? He was certain Euijoo thought he was absolutely insane, but in truth, it was all his fault. He was the one driving him insane! If there was anyone to blame, it was Byun Euijoo himself.
The brown-haired boy, who stood in front of the other with a look of endearment plastered on his face, reminded Nicholas of a banana. One of those bananas that are so brown that when you take a bite, it's practically like consuming a spoonful of sugar. Though Nicholas didn't like the ripest of bananas, he kept going for them when it came to Euijoo. He was undoubtedly sweet, the kind of sweet that made you sick to the stomach but yearn for more at the same time. Really, he would risk so much more than an aching stomach for a little taste of Euijoo, although he tried to convince himself he hated this feeling.
There were two things Nicholas was certain he hated: fruits and winter.
But maybe, just maybe, if during every winter, he could have the honour of receiving Euijoo's dear, beloved scarf, the season wouldn't be too bad.
🍊
One thing that fruits and winter have in common is that they are both extremely deceptive. A strawberry could look adorable and ripe, but once you take that first bite, you realise that it really isn't. You have no idea what you're putting yourself into until it's too late.
That was similar to this day. During the morning, the weather was bright, sunny and Nicholas thought that it was perfect considering how horrible it had been in the past week. He was unfortunately very wrong, because now, even though he planned to walk back to his dorm in hopes of enjoying the pleasant weather, he had no choice except for waiting for the downpour that banged against the roof of every classroom, the aggressive wind shaking the already lack of leaves on the trees, and muddy puddles that stretched over every footpath to calm down a bit.
He would have been wrong to curse himself for not bringing an umbrella — he'd likely have thousands of curses by now if he did so.
"Nichol," Same nickname every time. "Is that you?"
Nicholas half-regretted turning around, but it was all worth it since he got to see his favourite person on earth standing there, looking gorgeous as ever.
Like always whenever Nicholas got himself stuck in a dumb situation, Euijoo's lips turned downwards. That was how you knew he cared. "You said you were gonna walk home today, right?"
"Yeah..." Nicholas sighed, looking back out to the rain. "But I can't now, so I dunno know what to do."
"Mmh, well, would you be mad if I told you something that might just upset you?" Euijoo's pout morphed into a small smirk as he fumbled with his fingers.
The black-haired boy furrowed his eyebrows, "I could never get upset at you, Juju. What is it?"
He chuckled lightly before answering, "I kinda already knew that it would rain today, I didn't tell you though."
"Huh, why would you do that?" Nicholas asked, not mad or upset, puzzled for the most part. "Are you messing with me?"
"No, no, of course not!" Euijoo denied, waving his hands in the air. "I-It sounds stupid if I say it but... I wanted to walk with you, in the rain."
Oh.
How is he accidentally being so cute?
"E-Euijoo, I..." Nicholas paused, words caught up in his throat. "You could've just asked you know!"
"Yeah, I know! But it's more special this way, 'cause it was a surprise," Euijoo pulled an umbrella with daisy designs on it out from his bag. It wasn't that big — probably only just fitting the two of them underneath — but it was perfect nonetheless. He held it up above their heads and looked into Nicholas' eyes, smiling widely.
"Let's go?"
" Mhm, let's go."
The silence was comfortable, interrupted by the faint pitter-patters of raindrops on the umbrella every few seconds. Nicholas was overheating to a degree that certainly was not healthy at all — noting the fact their shoulders would brush against each other as they walked, Euijoo's quiet panting with each step he'd take, the scent of him, everything. It made him feel like he was crazy. He was crazy. Absolutely crazy about Euijoo, that was for sure.
It came to his attention that Euijoo would point the umbrella slightly more towards Nicholas than him, which resulted in him getting more wet. The umbrella was small and trying to fit two adults under it was a challenge, especially if you take into account that one of those said adults was trying to take tiny steps away from the other adult because he was about to go psychotic breathing the same air as him.
Nicholas felt the hatred crawl all around his body again. He hated it so much. Why did Euijoo have to care so much? Risking his flawless, knitted sweater that 'Fashionista Nicholas' — or so Euijoo liked to call him — was definite should not get any water on it, just for his sake? He couldn't tell whether he was doing this on purpose or not. Maybe he did it because he was aware it made Nicholas insane.
Well, to be honest, Nicholas wasn't too nonchalant about it, so that was kind of possible.
But for some reason with Euijoo, he got desperate. It was like when you eat a watermelon, you have to chase the juice that drips down your arms by licking it away, but it still leaves a coat of sticky residue on your skin regardless.
Euijoo never went away. No matter how hard Nicholas tried to wash him out, Euijoo stuck to him in every way imaginable and wouldn’t let go. The stickiness suffocated him — a trapped feeling, every pore on his skin soaked, yet Nicholas didn’t want him to go away. He wanted to keep tasting, and tasting, sucking on the sweetness that was Byun Euijoo until he left a hole in his heart that was shaped exactly like him.
He hated this desperation. You can only eat fruits so much before you start to get bored, have a desire for something new. Why wouldn’t that happen with Euijoo? Why did he keep craving more?
"Euijoo, stop," Nicholas muttered, loud enough for the boy to hear.
Euijoo did so as he faced Nicholas, staring into his eyes with confusion. "Is everything alright, Nichol?"
Nicholas stomped a foot on the ground and raised his voice, "No, nothing is alright, Euijoo!"
A drop of hurt swept over his face, the confusion fading into a heartbroken expression that made Nicholas' chest ache more than it already was. "D-Did I do something wrong? I'm really sorry."
"Wait, no! Well yeah, but no you didn't," Nicholas stuttered embarrassingly. "I'm just... so sick of you, Euijoo! I'm sick of feeling this way around you. I act like a complete idiot when all you're doing is being nice to me and I hate it."
"Nichol..."
Nicholas interrupted, "Whenever you do these things, my words don't work, my throat goes spiky and I can't breathe. I hate it! I hate you, but I love you at the same time, does that make sense? I don't understand—"
Suddenly, Euijoo pulled the shorter towards him, dropping the umbrella onto the wet concrete. Soft lips folded over Nicholas’ own and a citrusy taste filled his mouth.
The kiss was uncertain at first, but slowly melted into something steady, something real, something that confirmed both of their feelings. Like a sappy love letter, just more physical. They finally let all of the unspoken words out, that both of them were too afraid to admit were there since the start.
Eventually, they broke apart and Euijoo giggled into Nicholas' teeth, "You're so silly, but I love you too."
Nicholas didn't even have enough time to think of a reply, because Euijoo dove in again, this time cherishing the tang of strawberry from the other. They could hardly care about the fact they were both completely drenched from the rain — Nicholas' wet hair dripping onto where Euijoo had cupped his face. It was perfect to them. All they needed was each other.
Nicholas wouldn't say he particularly hated fruits. Well, he used to hate them with all of his guts, but people change. Sometimes Euijoo made him want to skin himself alive, like you do to an apple before you put it into a pie or other pastry, yet none of that took away from the overflowing love he had for him. Euijoo was precious, kind, and a person that only heaven could create.
So no, Nicholas did not hate fruits at all. In fact, he was very grateful for them, because they helped him find Byun Euijoo.
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