Work Text:
There was a time when I thought my era as a fanfiction writer was over.
My fanfiction demise started when I had an accident on the platform Wattpad. In the app, during the pandemic, I lost almost every fanfiction I have written but one, thankfully, the most important work to me. It took me about a year and a half to decide to start again, as I am enthusiastic about my letters. Recently, history repeated itself as, due to a bug on AO3, I lost my work once again, but one survived, and it became an orphan work. After that event, I gave up on writing fanfiction. Even though I failed as a fanfiction writer, there has been a constant in my life, essays. Despite English not being my first language, I consider it is the language in which I am most proficient when writing. One day, my acquaintances invited me to play a video game, but I thought of it as the most uninteresting thing, as I saw it as a copy of another video game. How foolish I was. The story did not need elaborate prose or grand design to move me. It only had the need to describe the story of a man who raised a son that was not his own. And that is the story that I will narrate to regain what technology once took from me.
The story begins with a man whose name was more code than something a mother would whisper: 007n7. Many would scoff at such a name, calling it cryptic, absurd, or artificial. I, too, am guilty of such a sin. Known throughout Robloxia as an exploiter, 007n7 was not a mere nuisance but a legend of disruption. With lines of code, he would invade peaceful places, corrupt many sessions, and shatter the illusion of normalcy for hundreds, if not thousands, who only wished for a moment of escape. Where others sought relaxation, 007n7 delivered chaos. What was built with effort, 007n7 destroyed in a matter of seconds. As a result, the man was not liked nor welcomed. However, it shall be recognized that the man was good, frighteningly good, at what he did, and he was proud of it.
One can easily condemn 007n7 when all he is highlighted for is the destruction he leaves behind. This, even more, when it is considered that the man will return to cause more destruction repeatedly, as if he is not already satisfied with his deeds. Perhaps he would have continued writing his scripts and launching his exploits without a second thought. However, something happened, something I can only describe as divine comedy or cruel irony, right?
The day everything supposedly changed started with a baby that appeared at 007n7’s doorstep. No sender. No warning. No note. Just a presence. A small, screaming child unlike any other, many would have discarded the child as a monster, even a demon. However, the man who had once brought servers to their knees paused. Some may say it was fate. Others might argue it was divine punishment. But I like to believe that, somewhere deep in his distorted desires, the Phantom Thieves worked their magic, and just like in Persona 5, something changed in him. It can also be arguable that perhaps it was not a stolen heart, but an altered one. And for the first time, the great exploiter looked not at code or chaos, but at life itself. And in that child’s corrupted cry, he saw a second opportunity. It was time to leave the exploits behind to become something more meaningful, a father, the figure of a child.
The story of a man abandoning the exploiter life to raise a son is quite moving, but when it comes to know that something is missing, the story will eventually shift. While many believe in the idea that 007n7 worked alone, that is far from the truth. There was a man, a friend of his, and they absolutely worked together; his name was Noli. There are many people, such as me, that believe in the possibility that both of them met in college, if there was any college in Robloxia. Maybe they were roommates, maybe they shared the same classes, nobody knows, everything is a speculation. There is another version that says they have possibly met online, never in person, however, but that version is not of my liking. Nonetheless, there is something that unites everyone interested in their story, which is no other than the truth; 007n7 was not a good friend, even to the point of being self-centered. The reasoning behind this is that 007n7 forced his own friend into taking the void star, how foolish Noli was.
With that stated, the story of a father seems to have erased the story of the worst friend someone can have. However, saying they were bad friends and leaving it like that might also be wrong. The level of importance one had for the other looks to be something beyond friendship. Maybe there is secret history that both have hidden from everyone: classmates, professors, janitors, and their other fellow hackers. It might have been something deep, something strong, something many societies like Robloxia doomed as wrong, as sinful; the love between two young men. How can a despicable man such as 007n7 have the capability to love? Well, everyone has one heart, so it is not wrong to say he was soft from the start, but hiding it with a hunger to cause chaos around Robloxia.
When the heart is present, even the most calculating man becomes a fool. Perhaps that is the reason for Noli; brilliant, arrogant, invincible Noli, listened when 007n7 whispered to his sensitive soul, “Take the Void Star.” Such a whisper was not a command... but a plea. And Noli, for all his intellect, obeyed. Not because he believed in the power, but because he believed in the man who said it.
"You never needed " Noli would have said with the little sanity he had left, and then, have forced himself to look at the man he loved, and whisper one more thing before succumbing to the star, "You just wanted to see if I’d do it for you, bitch."
"I- I didn’t think you’d actually listen," 007n7 would reply, stuttering, as the sight of his lover corrupting in seconds. Then, with guilt in his voice and watering eyes will whisper, "I thought you were smarter than that."
But love does not wait for logic. It demands, it devours, it blinds. And so, Noli took the star.
What could possibly draw someone as intelligent as Noli into such foolishness? Perhaps it was the strange charisma of a well-rounded man in a burger hat. Not romantic charm, not physical appeal, but a magnetic pull; words spoken with conviction, chaos wielded like a language. To ask why Noli listened is like asking why Elliot, in the forsaken realms, gives 007n7 pizza even after everything that happened to Builder Brothers Pizza. That man knows how to run his mouth; eloquence wrapped in irony; sincerity stitched into sarcasm. And sometimes, that is all it takes to enamor someone.
I would like to start again.
How does a man, a perverse entity, looks at a crying baby on his porch and suddenly reconsiders? There were no "Phantom Thieves," there was nothing like a "change of heart." No divine lightning, no cinematic redemption. It was quieter than that. It was a decision. The decision to start again… not in code, but in care; not in exploits, but in love. Not in exploits, not in madness, but in love. He had failed once, as a friend, as a lover, as a man. But perhaps, in the silence of a nursery, in the weight of a bottle or the warmth of a blanket, he could answer the question he never dared to ask: Can I do better this time?
In the soft lull of night, rocking the child to sleep, 007n7 remembered things he could never say aloud. The gaze they once shared. The kiss neither admitted to. The silences that screamed louder than any declaration. The forbidden touches that evoked a blush. And, in the end, a love not allowed to breathe, not because of the felonies they committed, but the label Robloxia gave to homosexuality during those days. One, cursed by the chaos he unleashed. The other, by the sin of loving a man who would never love himself enough to stay.
"Did you ever hate me?" 007n7 might murmur to the stars of the night.
"No," Noli would whisper back, "but I hated who I became when I loved you once."
And possibly, that fictional conversation was deep enough to make 007n7 weep in silent tears. Not for the servers he corrupted or the friends he lost. But for the one who stayed until it was too late. The one who took the star and corrupted. Because when you lose the love of your life once, you learn one cannot take love for granted. True love is fragile, mortal, fleeting, agonizing. And this child, this innocent weight in his arms, was not just responsibility, it was absolution. That baby was a second opportunity to live a pleasant life. Not to erase the sin of his past, but to ensure to himself that he will evolve to be someone better, someone he will become proud to be, someone his son will become proud of.
He still knew how to destroy. He could corrupt a thousand servers with a few keystrokes. His code might outlive him. However, none of it mattered anymore. Because once, he was loved. And now, maybe, he could learn to love back. If a man such as 007n7 gave himself the opportunity to love again, maybe it is time I give myself the opportunity to write again.