Chapter Text
“It’s been too long since I gained a new title.” Rhinedottir gave a decisive nod as she gazed at the sprawling expanse of Teyvat beneath her, letting herself focus only on this, ignoring anything that would come after. This would work. She could do this. And it would barely take a thought.
“Is being the new Shade of Life not enough of a title, my Dear Rhinedottir?” The familiar voice came at once. She used to stay quiet so much more often, but since they’d made their vows and sorted out their relationship, she was only ever quiet when Rhinedottir needed to focus. It wasn’t a complaint, even when she wanted to work, she sometimes found herself missing Naberius on the rare occasion she was quiet. “You’ve grown so sweet.” Though it was difficult to grow accustomed to having someone who could hear her every thought when she’d always been rather private. “I enjoy how much of an open book you are to me.”
“Of course, my love. How could I keep anything from you?” She smirked, but she couldn’t keep the fondness from her words. Even her pestering had become more endearing. “I simply meant that I used to collect so many. I’m one of the Five Sinners, one of the Four Shades, R of the Hexenzirkel, and of course the world’s premier expert of Khemia. But I haven’t so much as gotten a new degree in a few decades. I miss it. I need something new to add on to all my titles. It’s always been a collection.” And, of course, she kept hearing of how many people in Teyvat were gathering up even more. An honorary knight becoming the first sage of Buer and earning an ancient name, Varka naming that young girl as acting grand master, it was simply time for her to join them. She could hardly end up with the least impressive assortment of epithets in Teyvat.
“I still think that my title ought to best all of those others. You are me, baby. The Shade of Life should be enough.”
“It is always my most meaningful title, dearest. I simply wish to acquire some more.”
Her mind didn’t jump into more words. Naberius seemed to be pondering matters. “And you don’t care what they are? You’re not going to go eat my siblings as well, are you?”
“I wouldn’t dream of it. You’re the only Shade I need.”
“You have become so much better at flattery. But I suppose if you simply wish for something to do and a name to make for yourself…”
“Pick a place and I’ll go there. I’m not attempting anything.”
Perhaps that had sounded too suspicious, as Naberius was silent again for a long moment. “Very well. If all you’re after is a walk and some new people to worship you, I suppose I can manage. How about Inazuma? It was where we had our first proper date after all.”
“As you wish.” She was certain there were titles to acquire there. And she had to admit, she did have some fond memories of her last visit.
With their power, it took but a moment to reach Inazuma City. Now it was simply a matter of finding who could give her the prize she sought.
The city was much as it had been on their prior visit. Full of people, talking, dogs barking, a few cats wandering about, and all varieties of smells in the air. But she wasn’t there for food, unless perhaps an eating contest would sate her ambitions. “You are very good at eating.”
That almost flustered her. It only took a moment to collect herself, but she walked along the road, watching for anything that might catch her interest. Unfortunately, she stood out, and quite a few people stopped to stare at her. She’d never quite settled on how best to respond to the gawking. The last time she’d made squirrels appear in their hands and that had been a good enough distraction that they hadn’t pestered her as she finished her business, but now that would likely only attract attention, and that wasn’t what she needed. At least, not for her horrors that man ought never have wrought lest they anger the gods. She already had all the titles she desired from that.
“Try describing the principles behind alchemy to them.”
Lacking any other answer, Rhinedottir did as she suggested, only to find the people’s eyes glaze over and for them to all make excuses as they left. She crossed her arms, narrowing her eyes. “Was your point that my lectures are so boring that they would leave me alone?”
“I always find them fascinating, my dear Rhinedottir. I just know that I’m quite unique.” It was so difficult having nowhere to glower at in response to that. “You can lecture me later. I’d love to hear more on how you created your children.”
She knew all of her weaknesses. It was truly unfair. “Fine.” The giggle in her head was hardly helping, though it was fortunately quite adorable. She continued her path through the streets, not quite certain of what she sought.
As she approached a field, she began to hear a commotion. A man was yelling, a woman was yelling louder, children laughed, and chitin seemed to be scraping against chitin. She didn’t hear that sound often, and yet it was hard to forget. She couldn’t help but give into her curiosity, heading toward the noises.
The cheers grew louder as the chitinous sounds came to an abrupt end, and a man wailed in anguish.
There were several people gathered around a table, with a few kids cheering, while the devastated man appeared to be an oni, crying over a beetle. He looked oddly familiar. Had she attended a physics lecture from him? As the sobbing continued, she assumed she had to be mistaken.
“It’s okay, Itto. We can find you a better beetle,” a green-haired woman said.
“But he was a real champ! He can never be replaced.”
“He lost every match he’s ever been in.”
“And he took those losses like a champ!”
Every part of her better senses knew that she ought to turn away and find literally any other situation to involve herself in, but she simply couldn’t pry her eyes from this scene.
The oni--Itto stood, looking even more crestfallen, as he cradled the fallen onikabuto in his hands. “Good night, sweet prince.”
“We’re sorry,” one of the kids said.
Itto shook his head. “No. He would’ve wanted me to take this loss the same way he would have. You fought bravely. Your victory was earned.”
“Aw, boss, you’re really growing,” another man said. “I’m so proud of you.”
A club appeared in Itto’s hand. Was he going to bludgeon the children? He quickly dug up a small hole and laid the beetle to rest within it, before the woman filled it back in. “Okay, let’s go find a new beetle.” He grinned, his eyes closed, his expression surprisingly matching the children when they’d been cheering their victory.
“Oh, lady, did you want to have the next match?” one of the children asked, and it took a long moment for Rhinedottir to realize they meant her. They didn’t even seem particularly frightened.
“No, I wasn’t here for beetle fighting.” She had no idea if that was even what the game or sport or whatever it was was called, but they seemed to accept her answer and ran off, hoisting their victorious beetle over their heads and cheering for it.
“Is there something we can help you with?” the woman asked, wiping dirt from her hands. “You must’ve seen the fliers for our odd job business. I assure you, there’s no job that we can’t complete.”
She dressed like an assassin, but Rhinedottir had never heard of anyone so flagrantly discussing wetwork in the open. Was it not a euphemism? Were they merely workers for hire?
“Just think how much easier it would’ve been to find your test subjects if you’d known people like this.”
That was a compelling option, but she didn’t have the need of any subject at the moment. She hadn’t created a new medicine in years and any more complicated experiments were simply easier when she could control all the variables by making the lifeform from scratch. “No, I was just curious as to the source of the commotion.”
“Have you never seen a beetle battle before?” one of the men asked.
“I could teach you about them!” Itto shouted. “A newbie would be the perfect way for me to rebuild my reputation.”
“It didn’t work the last time,” the woman muttered.
Itto seemed undeterred by her argument. He clapped his hands together before pumping his fists. “All right, let’s find you the perfect beetle, and then we can get to practicing. I promise you’re going to love it.”
“You don’t have to if you’d rather leave,” the woman added.
“You were looking for novelty.”
She’d been looking for titles more than novelty, but she supposed beetle battle champion was a title as good as any other. “Actually, it would be my pleasure to learn beetle battling. Perhaps it would give me something fun to do with my wife.”
“Aw, you’re always thinking of me. Are you going to try to introduce this to my sisters as well? I’m sure they could use a new way to bond with you. I bet Istaroth would enjoy it.” If it was anyone else, she’d assume they were being sarcastic. Perhaps she didn’t know the other Shades well enough.
“Perfect! Just help me look then.” Itto beamed broadly and patted her on the shoulder hard enough to jostle her. “I’m Itto by the way. This is my gang.”
“I’m Shinobu. This is Akira, Genta, and Mamoru.” She gestured to the other men still gathered around.
She hesitated for a moment. All of her names had already garnered quite a reputation, but none of these people seemed likely to have any preconceived notions of her. “I’m Gold.”
Shinobu’s eyes widened. “As in…”
“I swear I heard about someone called that in college,” Itto muttered, but he promptly shrugged. “It’s nice to meet you. Help us look for some beetles!” Clearly some things were more important.
“There’s no need.” Rhinedottir gestured at the table where two beetles who should be perfect for combat were already standing. “I made us some.”
“I always love seeing you use my power. It’s the most intimate thing I can imagine, and your work is, as ever, breathtakingly beautiful, my love.”
“You…made…” Itto’s jaw dropped as he crept toward the table. “They’re perfect!”
“You’re really her?” Shinobu asked.
Rhinedottir only answered with a smile.
“They’re even better than Grandmaster Hanakado’s mechanical beetle! They could beat dragons!” She had perhaps been a little overzealous in her handiwork. “He is going to lose his mind when he gets back from Liyue! And you made these for me! Or I guess this one for me and that one for you?” He slid one closer to him. They must have already bonded, as it nuzzled his finger.
“You can keep them both if you’d like, once we finish our match. I can always make more.”
He looked as if he’d been struck in the back of the head. He stammered, tears welling up. “I don’t know how I can ever thank you! Please, please, please, Gold, let me make you an honorary member of the Arataki Gang! It’s all I can offer. I don’t have any mora. Oh!” He fished in his pocket. “I have half a candy bar!”
“I haven’t had candy in decades.”
“Very well. I’ll take that title, and the candy bar.”
Shinobu snorted. “So we have—welcome to the Arataki Gang.” She smiled, her teeth showing, but it seemed she was trying to hold back laughter.
“Yay! A new member!” Genta shouted.
“Can you make us beetles too?” Akira asked.
She assumed he meant make beetles for them and not turning them into beetles, and promptly did so, to even more cheering.
“Now let’s see them fight!” Itto nudged his beetle forward and Rhinedottir took her spot opposite him.
When the beetles collided, the table split in two.
Itto fainted.
“We are going to win so much candy!” Mamoru cheered.
“Well now you’ve done it. They’re going to have to start making new regulations.”
“There’s a tournament tomorrow,” Shinobu said, shaking her head, that same amusement twinkling in her eyes. “I think our team would be guaranteed to win now. And the prize is enough to pay off our bill at Kiminami Restaurant.”
“That’s even better than candy!”
Beetle Battle Champion it was. She was already gaining two new titles. “I’d be happy to enter with you.”
The celebration of their victory brought them back into debt with the restaurant, but the tournament was the most fun she’d had in years, barring her recent dates with Naberius, and it was hard to ignore the pleasure of a new title. Rhinedottir, member of the Arataki Gang and Beetle Battle Champion, it had such an absurdist quality she couldn’t help but love. Perhaps this really was going to work. She only hoped Naberius would forgive her.