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Season 2 If Netflix Weren’t Cowards

Summary:

When the Dead Boy Detectives find a chance that Niko could still be alive, they embark on a case to get her back. Crystal deals with David. Charles is confused. Edwin is slaying, as per usual — though gayer than usual. Cases are solved, shenanigans ensue, and Charles gets there eventually.

Chapter 1: Deranged Children and Lucky Charms

Summary:

We will be posting every Saturday unless someone dies i guess

Chapter Text

Here they were, Edwin and Charles, being lectured by The Night Nurse about a new case. She doesn’t understand how they function, and doesn’t quite fit into their dynamic quite yet, as she believes she can just boss them around.  

“I trust you boys can handle this one,” The Night Nurse says, before doing her weird disappearing thing.

“Charlie’s always a pleasure, isn’t she?” Charles leans over into Edwin’s space.

“If by pleasure you mean a rubbish againster.”

“Edwin, mate–”

Edwin stands from his seat abruptly, creating a new case card. 

Charles opens the short file The Night Nurse provided, reading down the bullets. “The ghost of the school basement. Not the best scenery down there, innit?”

“I believe not,” Edwin states looking at the small case file. “There’s not much detail provided here, so it’s best we be prepared for anything.  Charles, prepare your bag of tricks.”

Charles huffs, “It’s not a bag of tricks, mate. It’s an infinite pocket dimension that took years to master, but okay, sure, call it a bag of tricks.” he picks up said bag of tricks. “Should we wait for Crystal, then?”

“No, Charles. It’s midnight, and unfortunately the living need to sleep. It’s so inconvenient,” Edwin sarcastically sasses back sassily. 

“Alright then, shall we go?”

 

—--The Case of The Deranged School Basement Child—--

Edwin and Charles walked in silence through the abandoned school basement, it had dim lights and a musty floor with mold growing from parts of the ceiling, and Edwin was sure he’d have a headache if he were still alive. 

The atmosphere was not much different from when everyone would be ushered to their school basement during World War I to take shelter. It was so similar that it stirred a poignant feeling in Edwin’s stomach, that if he were alive goosebumps would crawl over his skin. These walls look like the walls he sat against hearing booms, and waiting for the ground to shift, looks like the roof he sat under reading letters from his older brother who was away at war. The shaky words on the paper, from someone Edwin knew, to someone he didn’t. He saw the letters as his brother lost hope, as his brother lost his will to continue fighting. This looked just like the very room Edwin sat in as he read what he didn’t know would be his last letter from his older brother. He was told that his brother sadly died a week after reading that letter. The room suffocated him with the smell of his brother’s death.

His older brother, who went, convinced it was to protect his family. Because at the end of the day, that’s what it was about. Protection of Oliver’s little brother. That’s what it was always about for Oliver. Oliver; who would cover Edwin’s ears when their parents were fighting again, who would listen to Edwin talk about whatever new random topic he took interest in, who was more like a parent to him than their actual parents, who gave up his life to protect Edwin. Edwin was the reason that Oliver became a stranger in his letters, the reason that his hope in the muddy hole of the trenches dwindled, the reason why his parents lost their brightest star in a foreign sky. 

These walls reminded him of Edwin’s inability to stick up for himself, the inability that led his brother to go to war because Edwin was too weak.  His failure to be strong in a family that accepted nothing less, a family in which he basically killed his older brother (in the cruel words of his mother). No matter how different the floors, how bright the lights, it looked like the same place with the same memories; his brother’s letters and Edwin’s own death.

From the distance, Charles begins to hear a noise, quiet at first, but slowly going louder. “Do you hear that, mate?” he asked, snapping Edwin out of his thoughts.

Edwin stilled for a moment to listen, and was about to answer when they noticed a shadow from a doorway. She was wailing, as a child would have if they had fallen down and scraped their knee. 

Charles and Edwin exchange a look, and Charles slowly walks forward, “'You alright?’ he asks, approaching the shadow, trying to be audible over the cries. 

The shadow only shrinks back and wails louder. The cries were pulsing through the air, as if cracking the bones of Edwin and Charles’ heads, well, if they were still solid, that is. 

Charles notices the shadow backing away, and steps back, and the shadow steps into the light. The shadow is a young girl dressed in a plain white gown no older than nine, though the file says she’s seven, her hair is dark brown, but matted with blood that has trickled down her face, her neck, staining her nightgown red. Her hair is in pigtails. She’s crying, and she looks forward as if seeing through Edwin and Charles. As if they’re not even there.

She releases more soundwaves from her cries, this time stronger, flinging both Edwin and Charles back into the walls. It surprises Edwin, but now she won’t stay still, running about, breaking things she shouldn’t.

Charles being Charles, moves forward again, this time grabbing her shoulder. Her volume increases so much that he’s not only flung back, but the lights overhead shatter. The only thing the boys can recognize her by is her glowing white eyes, and a subtle glow from one of her pockets. 

“Charles, get the lantern–” Edwin shouts, fighting to be heard. Thankfully the boys are close enough to each other that Charles does hear Edwin, and does as told. Then Edwin asks for a specific book that identifies spells, hexes, and charms, but the girl dashes forward to knock them back again. 

Charles takes this as his sign to try and lead her away from Edwin so he can take his space to flip through the book.

Charles is flung back multiple times in multiple different ways from the soundwaves, the noise of him making contact with different walls leading her away. Edwin finds the two spells he’s looking for, and approaches her from behind.

“Silentium quamlibet molesta est perferenda. Tace verba ut aperias sono novo.” he recites, and it’s almost as if she were a TV character being muted. 

She charges Edwin, and goes to bite him, but Charles grabs her shoulders to keep her in place. Edwin crouches in front of her, the look on her face is one Edwin recognizes from all the children that died from World War I. He finds the small magic charm in her pocket, and recites a spell, “Commendo operam, sed abosrb hanc virtutem spongiae more.” which absorbs the power and effect from the charm.

Edwin and Charles hurry away, Edwin taking the charm, and hiding in a doorway as the blue light of death takes the girl. 

 

—--Charms of the Alive are the Same as Charms to the Dead—--

 

Edwin lounges in the office, writing his report. Edwin’s fists clench and grind together in front of his torso as he does when he’s tense and stressed.

“You alright, mate?” Charles asks upon seeing his partner’s tenseness.

Edwin notices his fists, and brings them down, onto the table. “I can’t stop thinking about that charm the girl had–”

“What charm?” Crystal asks, barging into the boys’ office.

“Good morning to you too, Crystal.” Edwin says, almost annoyed.

“Good morning,” she says almost aggressively, “what charm?”

“Last night we were dealing with a crazy amped up ghost running off of magic fumes from a charm.” Charles states in vague detail.

Edwin now has a book in front of him in greater detail on different charms. As Charles catches Crystal up on all the details of the case the two had just closed, Edwin pours over the book. 

After some time, the atmosphere falls quiet as Crystal and Charles sit in silence, Charles going to read over Edwin’s report written to check for anything missing from the report (not that there would be, Edwin is very thorough when it comes to reports). 

Crystal goes over to bother Edwin, until she sees what he’s reading.

“Hey, wait, lucky charms?” she asks, looking at the chapter title.

“Yes? Is this some obscure pop culture reference? Because I’m not really–” Edwin begins.

“Niko was given a polar bear charm from Tragic Mick before we went to save you and Charles–” Crystal starts to say.

“Wait, what?” Charles says, now listening in to the conversation.

“Yeah, Tragic Mick gave her a charm. I think he said it was a lucky one.” Crystal says.

“Niko could still be alive.” Edwin states. It’s time to visit Tragic Mick’s.